As Gouda as Dead

by Avery Aames

  “Years ago. I’m rusty.”

  “I’ll meet you there after work.”

  “How about now?” He gestured to Rebecca. “Do you mind watching the shop while Charlotte and I go on an errand?”

  “Sure,” she said. “It’s slow this morning with everyone in church.”

  My insides snagged. Weddings and funerals. Beginnings and endings. Life and death. I pushed the thoughts from my mind.

  Jordan said, “We’ll be back in less than an hour.”

  “Whatever.” She shooed us away. “Go!”

  Jordan guided me across the street and onto the path through the Village Green.

  “What’s with the indirect route?” I asked. I didn’t mind. I was dressed for the cool weather.

  “I thought we could use a dose of sunshine.” He drew me close. We ambled through the park, pointing out other couples that looked as happy as we were.

  Minutes later, Jordan opened the door to the pub and allowed me to enter first.

  “Surprise!” more than thirty people yelled. Friends and family, all dressed for a party. Some were blowing party horns. Rice flew into the air and splattered my face and shoulders.

  Front and center stood Tyanne with a Cheshire cat grin on her face. She rushed to me carrying what looked like my ecru wedding dress. “Hurry, sugar. We don’t want to keep the minister waiting.” She started to lead me toward the kitchen.

  I gaped. “Minister?”

  “I’ve set up the bathroom in the back to be our staging area.”

  “Our what?” I turned to Jordan, who had trailed us to the back of the pub.

  He dropped to one knee and took my hand in his. “Charlotte Erin Bessette, will you marry me . . . today? Here, right now. In my new pub.”

  “Your . . .” I glanced over his shoulder and realized, for the first time, that the pub was decorated with white streamers, balloons, and daisies.

  “I . . .” He paused. “All of us want to make good memories at the pub again.”

  Rebecca emerged from the pack carrying a bouquet of daisies and baby’s breath. She thrust it at me. “Here you go.”

  “The shop.”

  “Closed for a celebration.”

  “You knew?”

  “We’re all in on it.” She swirled a hand to indicate the rest of the party.

  Grandmère and Pépère stood off to the side with Meredith, Matthew, and the twins. Delilah and Urso stood beyond them, as did Jacky and so many more friends. All were beaming.

  Meredith broke from the group and ran to me. “I stole into your house and filched your mother’s pearl earrings.” She held out her hand. The baubles gleamed in the soft light.

  Tyanne said, “I’ve hired the French horn player. He’s standing by. Delilah’s worked with the pub’s chef to put your menu together. The winter salad with chocolate-dipped strawberries, the chocolate cheesecake, and, well, everything. And, sugar, we have butterflies waiting to be released.”

  Tears sprang into my eyes. I turned to Jordan. “Are you sure?”

  “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

  “I’m impulsive and curious,” I admitted.

  “And loyal and true.” He tipped my chin up with a crooked finger. “Don’t forget, I have a few faults.”

  “Not many.”

  “By the way, I brought you something blue.” He withdrew a note from his pocket and handed it to me. “Open it.”

  It was a note in my handwriting—a note that I’d written a couple of years ago, thanking him for the first bouquet of flowers he’d ever brought me. It was our first love letter. I pressed it to my chest as a wealth of emotions caught in my throat. If only my mother and father were here to witness the occasion.

  “Yes, Jordan Pace, I will marry you. Right here. Right now.”

  Everyone cheered. The band lit into my mother’s favorite song. I swung around to signal my thanks and stopped, my mouth falling open. Jawbone Jones and Ilona Mueller headed up the band.

  “I thought they played blues,” I whispered to Jordan.

  “Not today. They’re good, aren’t they?”

  “Yes.”

  “Glad you approve. Now, get a move on, woman. Don’t keep me waiting any longer.”

  We married.

  The next day, after the coroner made official determinations as to the causes of death in both cases, which matched Ray’s account—death by drowning and death by suffocation—Urso released Tim’s and Dottie’s bodies, and the families held funeral services, not just memorials.

  At Tim’s service, Tyanne’s eyes brimmed with tears as she gave the eulogy. Deputy O’Shea followed her with an earnest speech. After Tim’s body was laid to rest in the cemetery, Jordan closed the event saying how much Tim, a friend to all, would be missed. His voice caught three times during the talk.

  Following the ceremony, Jordan and I took a contemplative walk.

  The next day, we moved ahead with our lives and went on our long-anticipated honeymoon. Bliss.

  RECIPES

  Cheese Pops

  À la Tyanne

  (MAKES 12)

  1 8-ounce container mascarpone cheese

  2 tablespoons honey

  1⁄2 cup craisins

  1⁄2 cup sunflower seeds

  8 ounces Gouda, shredded, room temperature

  Put all the ingredients into a large bowl and mix well. Using your hands, form the mixture into balls. Insert a white lollipop-style stick. Set the pops, cheese-side down and sticks in the air, on parchment paper and place in the refrigerator to harden.

  When ready to serve, cut a piece of Styrofoam to fit into a serving bowl or basket. Cover the Styrofoam with a piece of parchment. Make 12 slits in the parchment. Shove the cheese pops, stick-side down, through the slits into the Styrofoam. Bring to room temperature and serve.

  [Note from Tyanne: These are so easy to make, even my children could do it. In fact, it’s a fun activity for families. If you prefer, you can always substitute the craisins with raisins and the sunflower seeds with a nut of your choice. Pecans are my favorite. If you’re not a Gouda fan, try another cheese that you like, for example, Monterey Jack, Cheddar, or Havarti. Savor the flavors!]

  Macaroni and Cheese Appetizer

  À la Timothy O’Shea’s Irish Pub

  (SERVES 4)

  2 cups dried macaroni, cooked to tender (about 4–5 cups cooked)

  4 tablespoons butter

  1 clove garlic, chopped

  1⁄2 teaspoon salt

  1⁄2 teaspoon white pepper

  1⁄2 teaspoon paprika

  11⁄2 tablespoons cornstarch

  3⁄4 cup milk

  1⁄4 cup white wine

  1⁄2 cup mascarpone cheese

  1 cup grated cheese (equal parts Cheddar, Gouda, Monterey Jack)

  1⁄4 cup bread crumbs

  1⁄4 cup Parmesan cheese

  Cook macaroni according to package directions. Drain and set aside. Pasta may be made a day ahead. Note: Do not forget to drain and set aside. You do not want the pasta to be wet.

  In a large saucepan, melt the butter over medium heat. Add garlic, salt, pepper, paprika, and cornstarch. Cook about 1–2 minutes. It will boil and thicken. Stir constantly.

  Add milk and wine, stir, and let boil to thicken.

  Remove from heat and add mascarpone cheese and grated cheeses.

  Pour sauce over drained macaroni. Stir well. Fill 6–8 appetizer-sized ramekins with the mixture. Top with bread crumbs mixed with the Parmesan cheese.

  Turn oven on to broil. Set the ramekins about 4 inches under broiler. Broil for 5–6 minutes until crisp.

  Serve hot.

  [Note from Charlotte: This is perhaps my all-time favorite comfort-food appetizer. It simply melts in your mouth. The wine adds just a hint of
a kick! For a gluten-free option, which I make for the twins since Clair has to eat gluten-free, I use gluten-free pasta and gluten-free bread crumbs. Everything else is good to go! Enjoy!]

  Goat Cheese Cookies

  Gluten-Free

  (MAKES 36–48 COOKIES)

  21⁄2 cups gluten-free flour (I like sweet rice flour with tapioca starch)

  1⁄2 teaspoon baking soda

  1 teaspoon baking powder

  1⁄2 teaspoon xanthan gum

  1⁄2 teaspoon salt

  11⁄2 cups sugar

  1⁄2 cup crumbled goat cheese, room temperature

  6 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted

  1⁄4 cup vegetable oil

  1 large egg

  2 tablespoons milk

  1 teaspoon vanilla extract

  1⁄2 cup of sugar for coating cookies

  Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

  Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

  In a small bowl, whisk together gluten-free flour, baking powder, baking soda, xanthan gum, and salt. Set aside.

  In a large bowl, combine the sugar, crumbled goat cheese, and melted butter. Whip the mixture for 1 minute. Add in the vegetable oil. Stir. Add the egg, milk, and vanilla extract, and stir the mixture until smooth. (You might still see a few lumps; that’s okay.)

  Add the flour mixture and stir well. The dough will be soft but should be workable. If it’s not, refrigerate the dough until it stiffens up, about 15 minutes.

  Pour the 1⁄2 cup of sugar for coating cookies into a small cereal-sized bowl. Using your fingers, take a tablespoon of cookie dough, roll it into a ball, and roll it in the sugar to coat. Set the cookie on the prepared baking sheet. Remember to leave about 2 inches between cookies. They will spread.

  Bake each batch for 10–12 minutes, until the cookies are just set and slightly cracked. DON’T overcook.

  Cool on the baking sheet for 3 minutes, then transfer the cookies to a wire rack or paper towels to cool. Store the cookies in an airtight container for up to 1 week. They may be frozen if wrapped individually in plastic wrap.

  [Note from Charlotte: Goat cheese, like buttermilk, adds a delicate tang to these cookies, almost like lemon, which is a perfect balance for all the sugar. Trust me. They are chewy, yet crisp.]

  [Second note from Charlotte: For regular cookies, substitute out the gluten-free flour with regular flour and omit the xanthan gum.]

  Apple Bacon Gouda Quiche

  (SERVES 4–6)

  1 pie shell (homemade recipe below, or store-bought, usually frozen)

  1 green apple, pared and sliced into thin slices

  4–6 slices of bacon, crisply cooked and crumbled

  1 tablespoon brown sugar

  1⁄2 cup sour cream

  1⁄2 cup whipping cream

  1⁄2 cup milk

  1⁄2 cup mascarpone cheese (or cream cheese)

  2 eggs

  1⁄2 cup shredded Gouda cheese

  1⁄2 teaspoon cinnamon, if desired

  Heat oven to 400 degrees F. Bake pie shell for 5 minutes. Remove from oven and let cool. Reduce oven heat to 375 degrees F.

  Arrange apple slices in cooled pie shell. Arrange crumbled bacon on top. Sprinkle with brown sugar.

  In a small bowl, mix sour cream, whipping cream, milk, mascarpone cheese, and eggs. Mix in the shredded cheese. Pour the mixture into the pie shell on top of the apples and bacon. (The apples and bacon will rise in the cream. Don’t worry.) Dust with cinnamon, if desired.

  Bake 35 minutes until quiche is firm and lightly brown on top.

  [Note from Charlotte: If you need to eat gluten-free, either use a gluten-free pastry mix, a gluten-free store-bought pie crust, or substitute the sifted flour in the Pastry Dough recipe below with gluten-free flour. My favorite combo is sweet rice flour mixed with tapioca starch. Add 1⁄2 teaspoon xanthan gum to the mix. And make sure you roll out the dough between parchment paper for best flexibility. Gluten-free dough doesn’t hold together as well as regular dough, but be patient.]

  Pastry Dough for Pie Shell

  11⁄4 cups sifted flour

  1 teaspoon salt

  1⁄2 teaspoon white pepper

  6 tablespoons butter or shortening

  2–3 tablespoons water

  1 egg beaten with 1 tablespoon water, for egg wash on pastry

  Put flour, salt, and white pepper into food processor fitted with a blade. Cut in 3 tablespoons of butter or shortening and pulse for 30 seconds. Cut in another 3 tablespoons of butter. Pulse again for 30 seconds. Sprinkle with 2–3 tablespoons water and pulse a third time, for 30 seconds.

  Remove the dough from the food processor and form into a ball using your hands. Wrap with wax paper or plastic wrap. Chill the dough in the refrigerator for 30 minutes.

  Heat your oven to 400 degrees F.

  Remove the dough from the refrigerator and remove the covering. Place a large piece of parchment paper on a countertop. Sprinkle flour onto parchment paper. Place the dough on top of the parchment paper. If desired, cover with another large piece of parchment paper. This prevents the dough from sticking to the rolling pin. Roll out dough so it is 1⁄4-inch thick and large enough to fit into an 8-inch pie pan, with at least a 1⁄2-inch hangover around the edge.

  Remove the top parchment paper. Place the pie tin upside down on the dough. Flip the dough and pie tin. Remove the parchment paper. Press the dough into the pie tin. Crimp the edges.

  Brush with the egg wash. Bake the pastry shell for 5 minutes. Remove from the oven and let cool.

  The Country Kitchen Diner Chicken Potpie

  (SERVES 4–6)

  4 cups chicken broth (gluten-free, if necessary)

  1⁄2 cup butter (one stick)

  1 onion, chopped

  2 large carrots, peeled and cut into thin rounds

  1 celery stalk, diced

  1 tablespoon dried parsley

  1⁄2 teaspoon dried sage

  1 clove garlic, chopped fine (if desired)

  1 teaspoon salt

  1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

  1⁄4 cup cornstarch

  1⁄4 cup heavy cream

  3 tablespoons white wine

  1 pound skinless chicken breasts, precooked and shredded

  1 cup frozen peas

  1 recipe Pastry Dough (see below)

  [Note from Delilah: Make pastry dough first and refrigerate, then precook your chicken breasts. To cook chicken breasts, I wrap them in foil and pop them in the oven at 300 degrees F for 35–40 minutes. Remove from oven and let cool.]

  Preheat your oven to 375 degrees F.

  In a 6-quart saucepan, heat the chicken broth over medium heat for 2 minutes.

  Meanwhile, in large stockpot, melt butter over medium heat. Add onions, carrots, celery, parsley, sage, and garlic. Sauté until tender, about 10 minutes. Add salt and pepper. Stir.

  To the hot broth, add the cornstarch and whisk together until it thickens, about 5 minutes. Add the mixture to the vegetables. Stir in the heavy cream, white wine, chicken, and frozen peas. Bring to a boil then reduce to a simmer for 5 minutes.

  With a ladle, fill 4–6 ovenproof ramekins or bowls with the filling. Place the ramekins on a baking sheet.

  [Note from Delilah: For the crust, you can use store-bought pastry dough, or you can make it from scratch using this recipe. For gluten-free, substitute your favorite gluten-free mix for the flour. I use a blend of sweet rice flour and potato starch.]

  Pastry Dough for Potpie

  [Note from Charlotte: This recipe is slightly different from the recipe for the quiche pie shell, in which I use white pepper. All the savory quiche recipes I make at Fromagerie Bessette have white pepper in the pie shell. Without it, the pastry doesn’t have quite the kick.]

  11⁄
4 cups sifted flour

  1 teaspoon salt

  6 tablespoons butter or shortening

  2–3 tablespoons water

  1 egg beaten with 1 tablespoon water, for egg wash on pastry

  Kosher salt

  Put flour and salt into food processor fitted with a blade. Cut in 3 tablespoons of butter or shortening and pulse for 30 seconds. Cut in another 3 tablespoons of butter. Pulse again for 30 seconds. Sprinkle with 2–3 tablespoons water and pulse a third time, for 30 seconds.

  Remove the dough from the food processor and form into a ball. Wrap with wax paper or plastic wrap. Chill the dough in the refrigerator for 30 minutes.

  Remove the dough from the refrigerator and remove the covering. Place a large piece of parchment paper on a countertop. Sprinkle flour onto parchment paper. Place the dough on top. If desired, cover with another large piece of parchment paper. This prevents the dough from sticking to the rolling pin. Roll out dough so it is 1⁄4-inch thick. Using a biscuit round or mold (or be daring and go freehand), cut out dough large enough to cover the tops of the ovenproof ramekins, leaving about 1⁄2-inch hangover. Place each round on top of the individual bowls and crimp the dough over the edge.

  Brush with the egg wash and—IMPORTANT—make 4 small slits on the top of each to let out steam. Sprinkle with kosher salt. Place the baking sheet with ramekins in the preheated oven. Bake for 15–20 minutes. Remove from the oven and serve hot.

  [Note from Delilah: This is perhaps the most scrumptious potpie I’ve ever made. The stew is savory and reminds me of cool winter nights, tucked in front of a fire.]

  Triple-Chocolate Pudding

  From The Country Kitchen Diner

  (SERVES 6)

  3 tablespoons unsalted butter

  41⁄2 ounces semisweet chocolate

  1 ounce unsweetened chocolate

  1 cup sugar

  1⁄4 cup cocoa powder

  3 tablespoons cornstarch

  1⁄8 teaspoon fine kosher salt

  3 large eggs plus 1 egg yolk

  1⁄4 cup heavy cream

  3 cups whole milk