An Honorable Man

by Margaret Watson

  He didn’t want to think about some thug on her trail. Worse, he didn’t want to think about what could happen if that thug decided to do more than just follow her. Tossing the files back on the desk, he walked over to the window and shoved his hands into his pockets.

  He was just protecting his paycheck, he told himself, watching the people on the street below him. His unwanted reaction to Julia Carleton had nothing to do with it. Three hundred bucks a day would pay a lot of bills. And if something happened to Julia, he could kiss that money goodbye.

  It only made sense to protect his gold mine. It was just good business. The fact that his body reacted like he was sixteen again every time he thought about Julia Carleton didn’t make any difference. She could be the last woman on earth and he wouldn’t be interested in her.

  A black sedan cruising by on Milwaukee Avenue caught his eye, and he leaned forward in the deep window. Was it his imagination or did the car slow down, just a bit, as it passed beneath his windows? He watched with narrowed eyes as it blended with the flow of traffic and turned a corner. There were a lot of black sedans on the road. This one might have nothing to do with Julia Carleton or the detectives she was investigating.

  On the other hand, he was paid to be suspicious. Reaching into the top drawer of his desk, he pulled out his car keys. Stuffing the stack of files under his arm, he locked the door to his office and hurried down the stairs.

  Police headquarters hadn’t changed in the past two years. It still smelled like old coffee and stale air, and the walls were still painted the same dull gray. It was still full of suits, too, hurrying around as if they had someplace important to go. He stood inside the door and watched the activity for a moment, feeling the old excitement begin to drum through his veins.

  He’d loved police work from his first day as a raw recruit at the police academy. Nothing else could ever provide quite the same high, the same rush of adrenaline, as stepping into a dark alley and coming out victorious. And nothing else provided the same sense of satisfaction as knowing you were one of the good guys, that you did make a difference in the world.

  Julia Carleton had taken this away from him, he reminded himself, pushing away from the wall. The next time he was tempted to let his gaze linger on her face or her body, he’d do well to remember that.

  He didn’t have to look at the directory on the wall next to him to know where to find her office. The numbers on her door were burned into his memory. Heading for the elevator, he paused just before stepping into it and turned for the stairs instead. He’d never spent much time in this building until that summer two years ago, and he hadn’t been thinking about architectural details back then. It wouldn’t do any harm to become familiar with the layout.

  When he emerged onto the sixth floor he headed straight for Julia’s office. He’d seen enough of the building, and what he’d seen made him real nervous. The place was a maze of corridors and dead ends. Julia’s door was open a crack, and just as he raised his hand to knock he heard her voice.

  “I am not being nosy, I simply asked a civil question. I didn’t think your whereabouts last night was a state secret.”

  In the silence that followed her words, he heard a faint tapping sound that made him wonder if she was bouncing a pen on her desktop.

  She sighed. “Sorry, Bobby, I’m a little testy, too.”

  When he realized she was on the phone he lowered his hand. Faintly ashamed of himself for eavesdropping, he still couldn’t force himself to move away. Telling himself he needed to get as much information about Julia Carleton as possible couldn’t stop the hot licks of an emotion he didn’t want to name from sweeping over him as he listened to her.

  “I know,” she continued. He thought she sounded weary. “I love you, too, Bobby. I’ll see you tonight.”

  He slowly curled his hand into a fist and eased it into his pocket. So what? he asked himself. You’re not interested in her, anyway. You couldn’t be jealous because of a woman you dislike.

  Scowling, he raised his hand after a few moments had elapsed and knocked softly on her door.

  “Come in,” she called, and he pushed the door open.

  Surprise flickered across her face as he closed the door behind him. It only took a moment, though, for her to compose her features into the cool mask that so irritated him.

  “Hello, Mr. McKinley,” she murmured. “Have you read all the files already? I didn’t realize you were such a quick study.”

  Not taking his eyes off her, he lowered himself into the chair that sat next to her desk. “I’m fast at some things. Other things—” he paused and watched her for a moment from heavy-lidded eyes “—I’m not.”

  “Which is the reason for your visit today?” She folded her hands on her desk and stared back at him.

  He sat up slowly, fighting a smile. She was good, he had to give her that. She’d earned her reputation for being unshakable.

  “First of all, the name’s Luke. If we’re going to be working together, it’s going to be damned annoying to be so formal.”

  “You’re right. Please call me Julia.”

  “Fine…Julia.” He didn’t like the way her name felt on his tongue. Smooth and soft, it felt too much like a caress.

  “I haven’t looked at the files yet,” he said abruptly. “I came to ask you one question. Has Internal Affairs provided you with a bodyguard?”

  She looked at him with astonishment. “Of course not! Why would they do that?”

  “This is a pretty big case,” he answered softly. “Seven detectives accused of accepting bribes from drug dealers isn’t just a run-of-the-mill investigation. If it turns out to be true, even if only a couple of the detectives are guilty, it’s going to make the papers big-time. Isn’t the department concerned about your safety?”

  Her gaze dropped to her desk. “They don’t really know the extent of the investigation. It started out with just a suspicion of one or two guys. The more I looked at it, though, the bigger it got.”

  “You mean your boss doesn’t even know what you’re doing?” he asked, incredulous.

  “He has a general idea,” she said, finally looking up at him. “But like I told you at your office, everyone these days is looking out for themselves. ‘Get the cases closed’ is the word that’s come down the pike, and everyone is scrambling to get their own work finished.”

  “So no one here at Internal Affairs knows exactly what you’re up to,” he said, watching her.

  She looked him in the eye and said directly, “It seemed the best way to handle it. It’s been hard enough to get the evidence I need. I didn’t need any political pressure on top of everything else.”

  Once again, he had to admire her guts. “I guess it was the smart thing to do in terms of the investigation,” he said reluctantly. “But it was damn stupid from the standpoint of your own safety.”

  Her eyebrows rose. “Aren’t you exaggerating just a little?”

  “I don’t think so.” He leaned forward, his elbows resting on her desk, until she unconsciously backed up. “There was a punk in a black car following you this morning. Did you know that?”

  “Don’t be ridiculous, Mr…Luke. Why would anyone be following me?”

  “You don’t think that maybe you’ve annoyed someone with this investigation of yours?”

  “The only people I’ve annoyed are the clerks at the precinct. I’ve been there a lot, having them pull records and arrest sheets. But I really don’t think any of the clerks would be following me around in mysterious black cars.”

  His hand slashed through the air. “This isn’t a joke, Julia. Who else knows what you’re doing?”

  He saw her grip her pen more tightly, then consciously relax her fingers. “I suppose any of the men I’ve asked about could have found out, if the clerks happened to say something,” she said reluctantly. “If they are guilty, and I think they are, they would know immediately that we were on to them as soon as Internal Affairs was mentioned.”

  “Well,
someone knows,” he said grimly. “After you left my office, I saw someone come out of an alley near where you’d parked your car, get in his own car and follow you. I came down here to find out if there was any chance he was put there by your own department.”

  Slowly she shook her head. “No.” Licking her lips, she said, “We’re responsible for ourselves.”

  He stared at her for a moment, then slouched back in his chair. “And now I’m responsible for you,” he added grimly.

  “I hired you to help me investigate,” she retorted. “Not to act as my personal bodyguard.”

  “But if I want to collect a paycheck I have to make sure you’re around to write it out.”

  “Don’t worry, McKinley,” she said, a trace of scorn in her voice. “You do your job and I’ll do mine. As long as you help me get the evidence I need, you’ll get your paycheck.”

  He sat watching her for a moment, then stood. “I don’t think so. Until I figure out who it is that’s on to you, I’m sticking closer to you than a flea on a dog.” He stretched and rubbed his suddenly burning eyes. “Do you have any coffee around here? It’s a poor substitute for a few hours’ sleep, but it’ll have to do.”

  She stared at him for a moment, then leaned back and shook her head. “I don’t need a nursemaid. Go home. Read the files, go to sleep, do whatever you want to do. But you’re not going to hang around in my office all day.”

  “I thought that was what you wanted. Remember? This is your case and we’re going to work together. You don’t want me going off half-cocked on my own.”

  “I hardly think that going home and getting some sleep is going off half-cocked,” she snapped. “Once you read the files and are ready to start nosing around and asking questions, then we can work out a strategy together.”

  “I’ve already worked out my strategy. Until I find out who’s on your tail, you’re stuck with me. You don’t have to get the coffee for me,” he added, turning toward the door. “Just tell me where it is and I’ll get it myself.”

  She was watching him, that intriguing anger simmering just below the surface. Were all her emotions, all her passions so well controlled? Did she always keep such a tight rein on herself?

  Interesting questions, but he wouldn’t be exploring either of them. There was no way this would ever be more than a business relationship.

  “Sit down,” she said abruptly. “I’ll get your coffee. How do you take it?”

  “Hot, strong and naked.” He lowered himself into the chair and leaned lazily back. “The same way I like my women.”

  Amazingly, he thought her lips twitched. “Not a bad line. You get points for originality,” she said as she stood at the door. Now definitely fighting a grin, she added, “You’ll have to work on delivery, though. Your leer was off just a little.”

  He sat up, watching in astonishment as she slipped out the door. Who would have thought that Miss Cool and Composed had a sense of humor? What’s more, he realized with grudging admiration, she’d managed to turn the tables on him very neatly. By laughing at his crude remark she’d made him feel faintly ashamed of himself. He stared at the door where she’d disappeared. It could be an interesting couple of weeks.

  A few minutes later he heard her heels tapping on the floor as she walked back to the office. As he wondered briefly why he was so certain that it was Julia and not some other woman walking down the hall, he heard her footsteps slow down.

  “How’re you doing, babe?” a male voice asked.

  “I’m fine, Fred. And you?” she answered politely.

  “I’m hangin’. You still haven’t answered me, you know. When’re you going to go out to dinner with me, Julia? We could have a real good time together.”

  “Don’t worry, Fred. If I ever lower my standards that far, you’ll be the first one I call.”

  Luke smothered a laugh as her heels resumed their tapping down the hall. If he wasn’t careful, he could find himself actually liking Julia Carleton. But he was always careful nowadays, he reminded himself, his smile slowly fading. And where Julia Carleton was concerned, he’d be especially careful.

  She walked into the room carrying a chipped mug that she set down on the desk in front of him. It bore a picture of a stick figure in a cowboy hat using a six-gun to blast away at some very nasty-looking bugs. Underneath the picture was an indecipherable word that was at least six syllables long.

  Noticing him staring at the mug, she smiled slightly. “It was a gift from one of my brothers. He’s a sales rep for one of the big drug companies and it’s advertising for their latest miracle cure.”

  He raised his eyebrows as he took a sip of the coffee. It was just as bad as the stuff he used to drink in the station house. “You have a big family?”

  For some reason she looked away. “I have three brothers. How about you?”

  Setting the coffee cup on her desk, he shrugged. “One sister. She lives on the West Coast and I don’t see her very often.”

  He settled back in the uncomfortable wooden chair and wondered briefly why she’d looked away when she mentioned her brothers. The question was forgotten, though, as he shifted again on the hard chair and thought longingly of the couch in his office. Even the high-octane coffee he’d been drinking was having a hard time cutting through the fatigue. “So tell me who you think could be following you.”

  “I already told you, I think it’s ludicrous that any of the men I’m investigating could be following me.”

  “I never said it was one of them. I would have recognized any of the names on that list. This was some young punk. The kind of muscle that you’d hire if you didn’t want to do a dirty job yourself.”

  She looked up from some papers she was sorting. “Are you trying to scare me, McKinley? Because it’s not going to work.”

  “Damn straight I’m trying to scare you. If you’re scared, maybe you’ll pay attention to what I’m saying.”

  She dropped the papers onto the desk, flattened her hands on its surface and stared at him defiantly. “Don’t you think I would have noticed if someone had been following me around? I would know if someone was watching me. And I haven’t seen a thing.”

  “The whole point of following someone,” he retorted, feeling himself start to get angry, “is not to let them know they’re being followed. What good would it do them if you know they’re watching you?”

  She looked down at the papers she’d dropped on her desk, but not before he saw the flash of uneasiness, quickly hidden, in her eyes. “Even if someone is watching me, what difference would it make?” she said in a low voice. “It’s not as if I’m going to give up.”

  “If you are being followed, then we figure out who it is and why they’re following you.” He scowled. That brief glimpse of vulnerability she’d tried to hide sent his protective impulses into overdrive, and he didn’t like the feeling one damn bit. Julia Carleton was nothing more than his employer. “Once we do that, we know which direction we need to go with this case.”

  Looking back up at him, she gave him an unflinching look. “So if it’s true, then it’s a break for us, right?”

  “Right,” he muttered, wrapping his hand around the hot coffee mug and staring into it while taking a gulp. No, he didn’t care for this feeling at all. Julia Carleton was his enemy, the woman who had ruined what was left of his life after that rainy evening two years ago. He did not want to admire anything about her.

  When he realized she was still watching him, he shifted in the chair. “Go ahead and do whatever you were doing when I got here.” He remembered her phone conversation with “Bobby” and her “I love you,” and scowled again. “Don’t let me stop you.”

  Julia leaned back in her desk chair and watched McKinley as he slouched in the supremely uncomfortable chair in front of her. How on earth did he think she was going to be able to concentrate with him stretched out like that in front of her?

  “If I promise you that I’m not going anywhere until I leave this evening, will you go home?” s
he asked almost desperately.

  “You wouldn’t be putting the shuck on me, now, would you, Julia?” he asked, watching her unnervingly from under half-closed eyelids. “Because if I found out you were just trying to ditch me, I wouldn’t be very happy.”

  “Why would I want to ditch you?” she asked, exasperated. “I’m paying you a fortune to help me with this case. Don’t you think I’m going to listen to your advice?”

  He sat up then stood in one smooth, liquid motion. After a moment she realized she was staring and looked hastily away.

  “I don’t know. I’ve never known what makes you tick,” he answered quietly. “All I know right now is that I’m not letting you wander around Chicago by yourself until I figure out who’s on your tail.” He paused, his eyes hardening. “Like I said, you’re the one who’s paying my bills. Whether you like it or not, we’re attached at the hip.”

  “Fine,” she snapped, trying to hide the stab of pain at being referred to as his meal ticket. After all, she reminded herself, that defined their relationship exactly. “You can leave and reattach yourself tonight at seven o’clock. Right now I have some work to do, and I don’t want to walk around you every time I need a file.”

  He stood by the door, watching her with that unwavering gaze of his. “I’ll be one unhappy camper if I find out you’ve left this building, Julia.” His voice was low and almost menacing. “I’ll be back at seven o’clock tonight, and I expect to find you right here. Do we understand each other?”

  “Perfectly,” she answered coolly, forcing herself to meet his gaze without looking away. “Get some sleep, and I’ll see you tonight.”

  He gave her one last, long look, then slipped out the door and was gone. Taking a deep breath, she slumped back in her chair and let out a long breath. What had she unleashed?

  Even when she’d been investigating him after the accident two years ago, Lucas McKinley had had an unsettling effect on her. Now, when they were more or less on an equal footing, he was almost overwhelming. It would take all the strength she possessed to maintain her professional persona in front of him. If he ever suspected the effect he had on her, he’d be ruthless in using it to his advantage.