Hot Fudge (A Loretta Kovacs thriller)

by Anthony Bruno

  Krupnick was standing right on the other side of the bars. He wasn’t smiling.

  “What do you think?” Marvelli asked. “Am I right?”

  The hot poker crashed onto the top of the cage with a jarring clang. The fiery end spit embers inside, making Marvelli turn away. Krupnick laid the poker on one of the crossbars as if he intended to thrust it at Marvelli’s face. Marvelli backed away, but Krupnick didn’t do anything. He was watching Marvelli’s eyes.

  “I get what I want, Marvelli,” he said. “I always have.”

  Marvelli locked eyes with him. “Not everything,” he said, shaking his head. “No one gets everything. So what if you don’t get to do a murder? It’s no big deal. You’ll live.”

  “But you won’t.” Krupnick removed the poker from the bars and walked around to the door of the cage. He threw the bolt and opened it. “Come on out,” he said. “Take it like a man.”

  Marvelli didn’t move.

  “You gonna make me go in there and get you?”

  “You’re just gonna slaughter me like a dog? I don’t get a fighting chance? It won’t be very satisfying for you when you think back on it. Sort of like a dentist who has to put his patient under before he can have sex with her. It doesn’t really count as a score.”

  “Do you ever stop talking, Marvelli?” Krupnick asked wearily. “Stop trying to analyze me and look at yourself. Are you gonna just cower in there like a little veal? Come on out and take it like a freakin’ man. You’re the one who’s gonna be chewing on this in his grave. ‘I shouldn’t have been such a goddamn coward,’ you’re gonna be thinking as the maggots eat your skin. ‘I should’ve just faced the music.’”

  “No, you’re the one who’s gonna be chewing on this because it won’t count. It’ll be too easy. You’ll always know you really didn’t take me down.”

  “Just keep talking,” Krupnick said. He swiped the air with the poker a few times to stoke up the glow, then he bent his head and went into the cage, leading with the hot tip. “Any last words, Marvelli?”

  “Forget it. You say I talk too much as it is.”

  “No, no, make your peace.” Krupnick moved closer. Marvelli could see the glowing orange X as clearly as the big ? on an eye exam chart. But he was trying not to stare at it. He wanted to keep his focus on Krupnick’s entire body. “What’s the problem, Marvelli? I’ve never seen you so quiet. You must be nervous.”

  “Yeah, a little.”

  “Well, at least you’re honest.”

  “I try to be.”

  Krupnick waved the poker in slow figure eights. Marvelli could feel the heat on his bare chest. “Follow it with your eye,” Krupnick said. “It’s hypnotizing, isn’t it? Like a cobra’s stare.”

  Marvelli looked at it for a second, then looked away, forcing himself to zero in on Krupnick’s stare instead. Unfortunately, one was as bad as the other.

  A sick grin uncoiled under Krupnick’s mustache. “It’s wienie-roast time,” he said. He was looking down at Marvelli’s crotch.

  Suddenly Krupnick lunged, thrusting the poker, going for a direct strike to Marvelli’s jewels. But Marvelli saw it coming, and he rolled to Krupnick’s side, getting shoulder-to-shoulder with him, then kept rolling until he was back-to-back with Krupnick. He turned around fast and kneed Krupnick in the butt, which knocked him down onto his hands and knees. While he was down, Marvelli stepped out of the cage and kicked the door closed. But without the use of his hands, he couldn’t throw the bolt, so put his foot up against the door to hold it closed.

  Krupnick climbed to his feet. A thin line of blood ran down his forehead and into his eyebrow. He’d cut his head. “Pretty slick,” he said, seemingly unfazed. “That some kind of martial art move?”

  “Yeah. Something I learned a long time ago,” Marvelli said.

  “Well, it worked.” Krupnick picked up the poker and waved it as much as the space in the cage would allow. The tip, which had lost its color, started to glow again. He moved slowly toward the door. He seemed to be in a daze until he struck, jamming the poker through the bars, aiming low for Marvelli’s foot.

  Marvelli moved his foot out of the way, and Krupnick immediately kicked the door. It flew open all the way with a vibrating clang.

  “Are you trying to get me mad?” Krupnick asked as he stepped out of the cage.

  “Me?” Marvelli said, backing away. He looked over his shoulder to make sure he didn’t trip over anything. He caught a glimpse of Dorie. She was clutching her knees, sobbing into her arms. “Dorie?” he called out, but she didn’t answer. It didn’t look like she was going to be much help.

  Krupnick was laughing through his nose. “You didn’t really think she’d do anything, did you?”

  “I don’t know. I was hoping.”

  “Not her,” Krupnick whispered, as if he cared about hurting her feelings. “Not against me.”

  “Hey, I have faith in everybody.”

  “You’re such a positive guy, Marvelli. Maybe that’s why I envy you so much.” Krupnick raised the poker over his head and brought it down hard, aiming for Marvelli’s skull.

  But Marvelli stepped aside and avoided the blow. The poker missed and hit the wood floor, leaving a brown scorch mark. Marvelli moved away quickly, opening up some distance between them, but Krupnick was undaunted. He faced Marvelli squarely and continued to stalk him.

  “Know any good jokes, Marvelli?”

  “Nah, I’m bad at jokes. I never tell them right.”

  “Good reason to kill you then.” Krupnick raised the poker and took another swing at Marvelli, aiming for the side of his head this time.

  Marvelli ducked and moved forward, slipping behind Krupnick. He got his foot in the small of Krupnick’s back and gave him a good shove. Krupnick hurtled forward and went down hard on one knee. He came right back up, though, and faced Marvelli, shaking his head disapprovingly.

  “Bad move, Marvelli. Didn’t your mother ever tell you never to piss off the guy with the hot poker?”

  Marvelli glanced at the door on the other side of the room. It appeared to be the only way out. But even if he could get past Krupnick, he’d have a hell of a time trying to turn the knob with the handcuffs on. If only Dorie would just snap out of it.

  “Dorie—” he started to say, but Krupnick was coming at him with the poker again. He was aiming to bash Marvelli over the head.

  Marvelli moved fast, stepping into Krupnick and dropping to a crouch as the poker came crashing down. The force of the blow, having missing its target, took Krupnick’s balance. Marvelli stood up with his back against Krupnick’s gut and lifted the big man off his feet, flipping him over onto the hard floor.

  “Shit!” Krupnick hissed. The poker had somehow gotten under him, and he’d burned himself. Cursing and groaning, he scrambled to his knees. The smell of burning leather traveled over to Marvelli. He could see a small irregular burn hole in Krupnick’s pants behind his thigh.

  Krupnick covered his wound and reached for the poker at the same time. “Bad, bad, bad, Marvelli. Now I’m mad. I was trying to keep my emotions out of this, but you ruined it.”

  “My apologies,” Marvelli said as he made a run for the door. He knew he had to give it a try, but as he ran, he noticed Dorie, and he realized that he couldn’t leave her here with this maniac. She’d seen too much. Krupnick probably planned to kill her, too. Marvelli stopped short and turned around.

  Krupnick was standing over by the hibachi. He’d thrown his old poker back in and pulled out two fresh ones, holding them up high to show Marvelli. “Do you think if I pressed one of these things into each side of you, I could burn a hole right through?”

  Marvelli shrugged. “Beats me.”

  “Let’s try it.” Krupnick hobbled forward like a pirate on a peg leg, holding the pokers like hooks.

  Marvelli was looking all around, searching for an idea. They could keep this up for a little while longer, but without the use of his hands, he was bound to lose. He looked to Dorie, who was
still inconsolable.

  “Dorie?” he said gently. “Dorie, listen to me.”

  But Dorie wasn’t responding to anything, not even his impending shish kebabing.

  Krupnick was lumbering closer. Marvelli stepped backward, keeping his distance from the hot pokers. Suddenly he stumbled over a misplaced pair of thigh-high, stiletto-heeled boots, but he caught himself before he fell.

  “Watch it,” Krupnick said. “Don’t want you hurting yourself.”

  “Wouldn’t want that.”

  “No, no, no,” Krupnick said. “I want to do the hurting. All of it.”

  Without warning the door opened, and Dragon rushed in, followed by Loretta, Sunny, and Vissa.

  Krupnick’s Jolly Roger mood instantly turned foul. He glared at Loretta and Vissa. “You’re supposed to be dead,” he yelled at Vissa. He shifted his gaze to Loretta. “And who the hell let you out?”

  “I did,” Sunny said defiantly.

  “And she had to throw the bed frame through a plate-glass window to do it,” Loretta said, echoing Sunny’s attitude.

  Dorie was on her feet. “He’s trying to kill Marvelli,” she said to the other women.

  “Well, duh,” Sunny said caustically. “He wants to kill us all.”

  “Oh, Sunny honey,” Krupnick said in mock shock and disappointment. “Would I do that?”

  “I never thought you had it in you,” Sunny said, “but you might.”

  Krupnick’s face contorted in barely concealed fury. “What do you mean, you never thought I had it in me?”

  “You’re a crook and a son of a bitch,” Sunny said, “but believe me, you’re no killer. Look.” She pointed at Vissa. “You botched her, didn’t you?”

  Vissa was rubbing her neck. “Yeah, thanks for nothing. Is this what I get for old times’ sake? A sheet around the neck? I don’t know what I ever saw in you.”

  “Me neither,” Dorie said.

  “Same here,” Sunny concurred.

  Loretta paused and looked at the other women, then looked at Krupnick. “Well, if I had slept with you, I’d feel the same way.”

  Even Dragon was snarling silently at Krupnick.

  He turned to Marvelli. “So do you have anything to add?”

  “No,” he said. “I think they’ve just about covered everything.”

  “Good,” Krupnick said. “Excellent. I’m glad for all of you.” He was moving slowly, stepping toward Marvelli, who was between him and the women. Krupnick’s face was flushed, and his eyebrows had taken on a wicked arch. “You know what else makes me glad? That you all think I’m incapable of murder. Somehow you all got the idea that I’m inadequate. Impotent, even. Well … you’re wrong.” He raised the poker in his right hand and lunged toward Marvelli.

  Marvelli started to move out of the way, but he was startled by Loretta, Sunny, and Vissa all yelling in one voice. “Dragon! Sic him!”

  “Yeah, sic him!” Dorie chimed in.

  Dragon was already in the air, sailing past Marvelli with teeth bared. Everyone except for Sunny was stunned. They’d never seen Dragon move like that before. The dog landed on his feet between Marvelli and Krupnick, who now had to shift his attention to the new nuisance. He lifted one of the heavy pokers across his shoulder, about to backhand Dragon with it.

  “No!” Loretta shouted.

  But Dragon moved like lightning. Before Krupnick could bring down the poker, Dragon leaped up and latched on to Krupnick’s codpiece.

  Krupnick’s eyes shot open, his brows disappearing in the accordion wrinkles in his forehead.

  “Half and half!” Sunny called out, and the dog obeyed, applying just enough pressure with his jaws to keep hold of the codpiece.

  Krupnick didn’t seem to be in pain, but he was white with fear. “Sunny! Please!” he begged. Frozen where he stood, he held the poker up over his head. He didn’t dare move a muscle.

  “Drop the pokers,” Sunny said.

  “But, Sunny honey—”

  Sunny shook her head. “Dragon only knows two jaw commands. ’Half and half means just hold it. The other command means bite it off. All I have to do is say the word, and you’ll be half the man you are right now.”

  “Sunny, please,” Krupnick sputtered. “You know I never intended to hurt you. You’re different.”

  Vissa rolled her eyes and looked at the other women. “How many times have we heard that before?”

  “Plenty,” Dorie said.

  “Come on now,” Krupnick pleaded, pointing with his eyes at the dog attached to his crotch. “Have a heart.” Dog saliva dribbled down the inseam of his leather pants.

  “Did I ever tell you that Dragon has a little pit bull in him, too?” Sunny said to Krupnick.

  “Sunny, call him off. Please!”

  “Drop the pokers first,” Loretta said, raising her voice.

  “But the noise might upset Dragon,” Krupnick said. “I don’t want him getting upset.” Sweat was dripping off his nose.

  “He won’t get upset,” Sunny assured him. “Not that way. To do that he has to hear me say—”

  “Don’t,” Krupnick blurted. “Here. Look. I’m putting them down. See?” He laid the pokers down as gently as he could. Dragon held his position like a gargoyle, keeping his teeth clamped on Krupnick.

  “Good boy,” Sunny said to her dog. “Isn’t he a good boy, Arnie? Come on, praise him. Say ‘good boy.’ ” “Good boy,” Krupnick murmured.

  “Louder. And you have to sound happy. Tell him you’re proud of him. Say, ‘Arnie’s proud.’ Say it like that.”

  “Good boy,” Krupnick said quickly and louder. “I’m proud of you. I am so proud of you.”

  “I trained him to hang on like that,” Sunny said. “One of my clients asked for it specifically. See, what he’s doing now is his soft mouth, which is for flesh. But he also has a hard mouth, which I always demonstrate to my clients to show them how much damage he can really do.”

  “Just out of curiosity,” Marvelli asked, “how do you demonstrate hard mouth?”

  “With a broomstick. He can bite one in half without even trying.”

  Krupnick was turning green.

  “And all he needs is to hear your command?” Marvelli asked.

  “That’s right. Two little words.”

  Loretta turned to Sunny. “So what are they?”

  “No!” Krupnick begged. “No! Don’t say it!”

  Sunny motioned for the other women to come closer. They huddled together, and she whispered in each of their ears. One by one they came up nodding and grinning after they’d heard it.

  “Now we all know the command,” Sunny announced. “So if you misbehave, any one of us can punish you.”

  “Severely,” Vissa said.

  “Horribly,” Dorie said.

  “Irreversibly,” Loretta said.

  Krupnick winced.

  Marvelli watched him with intense interest and maybe even a little sympathy.

  Loretta went over to Marvelli and stroked his cheek. “Are you all right?” she asked.

  “Yeah, I’m okay. How about you?”

  “I’m fine.” She threw her arms around him and hugged him tight.

  “I wish I could hug you back,” Marvelli said. “Think you could persuade Sunny to take the cuffs off?”

  “Sunny?” Loretta said.

  But Sunny already had the keys out of her pocket. “Here.” She tossed them to Loretta, who immediately picked out the smallest one on the chain and unlocked the cuffs.

  “Oh, that feels good,” Marvelli said, massaging his raw wrists as he hugged Loretta.

  “Sunny, please!” Krupnick hissed. He and Dragon were perfectly still, the dog up on his hind legs, his front paws on Krupnick’s thighs, the codpiece clamped in his jaws. The only thing that moved was the sweat trickling down Krupnick’s face.

  “Better than handcuffs,” Marvelli said.

  “Depends on your point of view,” Krupnick muttered.

  “Can I borrow these?” Vissa asked as s
he took the handcuffs from Loretta and went over to Krupnick. “Hands behind your back, Ira. You know the drill.”

  “But, Vissa, let’s discuss—”

  “Sssshhh! Don’t talk. I know the command.”

  Krupnick immediately buttoned his lip, though it was clear from his face that it was killing him.

  Loretta was laughing softly to herself. “A con artist who can’t talk is like a man without a …”

  The other women howled with laughter as Vissa secured the cuffs.

  But Marvelli was still curious about that command. He took Loretta aside and whispered to her. “So what is it?” he asked. “What’s the command?”

  Loretta’s eyes sparkled as she raised her eyebrows. She flashed a mock innocent grin and shrugged. “Sorry. It’s a woman thing.”

  Marvelli looked sideways at Krupnick’s crotch. “Just as long as it’s not my thing,” he murmured.

  Loretta took his face in her hands. “I don’t think you have to worry about that.”

  33

  The next day Loretta, Marvelli, and Dorie were in Krupnick’s living room in Haight-Ashbury. It was early in the afternoon, and they’d just arrived. Dorie had offered to let them in so that Marvelli could collect his clothes from the dungeon.

  “Can I get anybody anything to drink?” Dorie asked as they came in from the front hallway.

  “No, thanks,” Marvelli said.

  “Not for me,” Loretta said. “Anyway we don’t have much time. From here we have to go pick up Vissa and Krupnick at the county jail, then get to the airport. We’re flying Krupnick back to New Jersey this afternoon.”

  Dorie threw her a sly look. “With or without Dragon attached?”

  “I suggested that,” Loretta said, “but Sunny didn’t want to part with him, even temporarily. She said she was going to take him up north and let him run through the redwoods. She said she owed it to him.”