The Berenstain Bears Chapter Book: The G-Rex Bones

by Stan Berenstain

  “Where did you get that crummy little thing, anyway?” said Sister.

  “From a box of Grizzly Jack,” said Barry. “It was the prize. It must have broken when I bit it by accident.”

  “Great!” said Sister. “You’re a prize, too, Barry.”

  “So how do we figure out which way east is?” asked Lizzy.

  “I know!” said Fred. “The sun! It rises in the east and sets in the west!”

  Shading their eyes, they all looked up. And groaned in unison. The sun was directly overhead.

  “That means it’s noon!” cried Barry.

  “So what?” said Sister.

  Barry shrugged. “So, at least we know what time it is.”

  More groans.

  “We’re saved!” cried Fred all of a sudden. He pointed at the spot his binoculars were aimed at. “I see the bus! We’re only about a mile from the highway. Let’s get going.”

  The cubs headed for the highway side of the mesa. But then they held back. “Come on, Liz!” called Barry.

  Lizzy hadn’t budged. She was training her binoculars on something far off in the opposite direction. The others hurried to her side. “What is it, Liz?” asked Brother.

  “I see some bears out there,” she said. “In a shallow gulch. Look.”

  They scanned the area Lizzy was aiming at until they all found the bears.

  “Five of ’em,” said Fred. “And there’s a pickup truck at the edge of the gulch.”

  “They’re all holding something,” said Sister. “Shovels, I think. Hey, one of them just looked up. Now he’s looking all around. He’s looking in this direction.”

  “Who are they?” Brother asked Lizzy, who had the sharpest eyesight of any of the cubs.

  Lizzy peered extra hard through the rising heat waves that made everything wiggly and watery. “I can’t make out any faces,” she said. “But one of them is wearing a straw hat. Now he’s looking around too. He’s got a green suit on. And white things down around his ankles.”

  “Spats?” said Fred. “Green suit? Straw hat? You just described Ralph Ripoff.”

  “What the heck is Ralph doing way out here in the desert?” said Sister.

  “Hmm,” said Brother. “Something tells me that’s for Ralph to know and us to find out.”

  “Does that mean you’re gonna call a meeting of the Bear Detectives?” asked Fred eagerly.

  “Not yet,” said Brother. “We need more to go on. Maybe something will turn up in the next few days. Meanwhile, let’s get back to the bus. Sooner or later Teacher Bob and Teacher Jane will look for us there.”

  Chapter 5

  Fossil Furor

  It turned out that Brother was right about both things. Teacher Bob and Teacher Jane did eventually check the bus for the lost cubs. And something did turn up about Ralph’s desert trip in the next few days. The very next day, in fact.

  The Bear family was gathered in front of the TV in the family room after dinner. Papa aimed the remote at the TV and pressed the on button. They were all very excited because they’d just gotten cable. Papa and Mama wanted to watch the Bear News Network (BNN), Brother wanted sports (BSPN), and Sister wanted Bear Music Television (BMTV). But Papa was the supreme lord and master of the remote (at least, whenever Mama let him be). So on came BNN.

  A BNN-Live telecast was in progress. On camera was some sandy ground, on which rested some very large bones. The camera shifted to a group of bears digging with shovels in the sandy earth.

  “Hey, that’s Dan Digger and his team of workbears,” said Papa. “I wonder what they found.”

  Then came the voice of Christiane Amanbear, the famous roving newscaster. “I’m out here in Great Grizzly Desert, where an old hermit named Sandcrab Jones has discovered fossils of a dinosaur near his shack.”

  The camera shifted to another very recognizable bear, who was more infamous than famous. “Standing next to me,” continued Amanbear, “is Ralph Ripoff, Beartown’s well-known small-time crook and swindler. I understand, Mr. Ripoff, that Sandcrab Jones contacted you soon after he found the dinosaur bones. Is that correct?”

  “That is correct, Christiane,” said Ralph, grabbing the mike from her as he smiled broadly at the camera. “Sandcrab knew there was going to be a lot of publicity from this, not to mention a little money, and he was worried about handling such complicated matters all by himself. So I agreed to be his agent. He and I go way back, you know.”

  “So I hear, Mr. Ripoff,” said Amanbear, snatching back the mike. “Our research staff has found that some time ago you sold Sandcrab Jones a termite insurance policy for his shack. They also found that the yearly price of the policy is more than it would cost Mr. Jones to rebuild his shack if it were completely destroyed by termites.”

  “Termites?” said Ralph nervously. “I thought we were gonna talk about dinosaurs, not termites.”

  “Maybe I should ask Mr. Jones himself about the termite insurance,” said Amanbear. “Where is he?”

  “He’s holed up in his shack over yonder,” said Ralph quickly. “Kinda camera-shy, you know …”

  Papa hit the mute button and turned to Mama. “This is really big news,” he said. “Did you see the size of those bones? Wait’ll Professor Actual Factual hears about this!”

  “I’m sure he already has, dear,” said Mama. “But it bothers me that Ralph is involved …”

  “Nonsense!” said Papa. “You heard Amanbear. Ralph sold Sandcrab some phony termite insurance. The old coot is probably feeble-minded. Natural for him to contact Ralph. Besides, there’s no chance in the whole wide world that Ralph would try to swindle Actual Factual. The professor knows fossils through and through. And that includes knowing what they’re worth.”

  “I guess you’re right,” said Mama. “Still …”

  “What do you think, cubs?” said Papa. “Pretty exciting, eh?”

  The cubs had been transfixed by the sight of Ralph Ripoff and bears with shovels in Great Grizzly Desert for the second day in a row. They were still staring at the TV screen.

  “Who, me?” said Brother. “Sure, Dad, it’s great. I think I’ll go upstairs and do my homework now.” He started up the stairs, then stopped and announced more loudly, “I said: I THINK I’LL GO UPSTAIRS AND DO MY HOMEWORK NOW …”

  Sister jumped up. “Oh, yeah, me too,” she said, and hurried after Brother to talk about what they had just seen on TV.

  Chapter 6

  Gigantosaurus rex!

  By the time the Bear Detectives gathered in their usual booth at the Burger Bear the next evening, it was all over town that Professor Actual Factual had agreed to buy the fossils from Sandcrab Jones for the Bearsonian Institution. The price: five million dollars. That morning, Actual Factual had visited the discovery site to examine the bones, which Ralph and Sandcrab had stored in a big tent. Actual Factual had announced that the fossil bones belonged to a new species of meat-eater similar to Tyrannosaurus rex. When the whole skeleton was finally put together and displayed in the rotunda of the Hall of Dinosaurs, he predicted, it would stand fully twice as tall as a T-rex. Not just the science world but all Bear Country was abuzz about the spectacular new find.

  “Well, let’s start the meeting,” said Cousin Fred when the cubs’ milk shakes had been served.

  “Let’s wait for Ferdy,” said Brother. “I invited him to join us because of his knowledge of fossils and dinosaurs.” Ferdy Factual, cub genius, was Actual Factual’s nephew.

  “You did?” said Fred. He looked hurt. “But I know a lot about fossils and dinosaurs …”

  “No offense, Fred,” said Brother. “But your knowledge is all from books. Ferdy has worked with his uncle in the Bearsonian fossil lab. Real hands-on experience.”

  “Well, okay,” said Fred. “Just so long as he keeps his hands off my Bear Detective spot.”

  Brother assured Fred that no one wanted to replace him as a permanent Bear Detective. Ferdy would only be sworn in as a temporary Bear Detective.

  Moments
later, Ferdy arrived. He was late because he’d come directly from the Bearsonian, where he’d had trouble getting through the crush of media bears camped outside the entrance. Brother swore him in and told him about what the cubs had seen in the desert during the school field trip.

  Ferdy stroked his chin as he listened. Then he said, “That is a very suspicious story, indeed. Ralph Ripoff and four other bears with shovels. On the day before Sandcrab Jones is supposed to have found the fossils. But we don’t know for sure if Sandcrab was one of those bears with Ralph, or even if it was the same spot where the fossils were found.”

  “That’s right,” said Lizzy. “Maybe Ralph was out there looking for fossils in some other spot.”

  “That’s not quite what I had in mind,” said Ferdy. “It is highly unlikely that a small-time crook and swindler would become an amateur fossil hunter overnight. I was merely suggesting that before we develop any theories about what Ralph is up to, we should make sure that he was actually seen at the site of the discovery.”

  The cubs agreed with Ferdy and made plans to check it out. Brother thought he could find the mesa from which they’d spied Ralph. And Fred had a big map of Great Grizzly Desert to help them. Sister thought Papa would agree to drive them out there if they told him the truth about their investigation. After all, if there was something fishy about the new fossils, it wasn’t just a Bear Detective problem. It was a Bear Country problem.

  Ferdy insisted they go the very next day, which was Saturday. There was no telling, he said, where the investigation would lead or how long it would take. Actual Factual and Ralph had already made plans to sign the bill of sale in the rotunda at the Bearsonian the following Saturday, right beside the newly put together dinosaur skeleton. So the Bear Detectives had to act fast.

  “The only thing that might cause a delay in the signing,” said Ferdy, “is some problem with the tests in the Bearsonian chemistry lab.”

  “What tests?” asked Brother.

  “Uncle Actual brought a fossil toe bone back from the desert to run chemical tests on,” said Ferdy. “To make sure it’s a real fossil.”

  “You mean somebody might have made fake dinosaur fossils?” said Lizzy.

  “And buried them in the desert?” said Sister.

  “Well, it’s highly unlikely,” said Ferdy. “Not even Ralph’s involvement leads me to think so. No doubt, if Ralph is involved, it’s only to swindle Sandcrab Jones out of a lot of money. So the chemical tests on the G-rex bone are really just a precaution.”

  “Did you say G-rex bone?” asked Brother.

  Ferdy blushed and put his hand to his mouth. “It just slipped out,” he said. “It’s supposed to be a secret, so please don’t tell anyone. Uncle Actual has already decided on a name for the new species.”

  “But I thought it was a new species of Tyrannosaurus,” said Fred, eager to demonstrate his knowledge. He turned to the others. “You see,” he explained, “Tyrannosaurus means ‘tyrant lizard’ in Latin, and rex means ‘king.’ King of the Tyrant Lizards. Rex is the species, and Tyrannosaurus is the genus, which is a group of related species.”

  “Related like brother and sister?” asked Sister.

  “Related in evolution time, not family time,” said Fred.

  “We have family time every night after dinner,” said Lizzy.

  “Not that kind of family time!” said Fred.

  “Please, Fred, allow me,” Ferdy broke in. “Actually, related like brother and sister isn’t such a bad way of putting it. What Fred is trying to say is that if the new species were very closely related to the T-rex, sort of like brother and sister, it would also be called Tyrannosaurus but would have a different name in place of rex. I actually suggested two such names to my uncle. I assumed he would name the creature after himself, as so many fossil hunters do. ‘What about Tyrannosaurus actualfactualus?’ I asked him. He said it was too much of a tongue-twister. ‘Well, then, what about Tyrannosaurus professorus?’ He pointed out that he wasn’t the only professor in Bear Country. Then he told me that what I should be trying to think up was a replacement for ‘Tyrannosaurus,’ not for ‘rex.’ Because his examination of the entire set of bones had shown that the new species was not in the same genus as T-rex. Now, at twice the height of T-rex, the new species was clearly the true king of the tyrant lizards. But, of course, that name is already taken. So I suggested Gigantosaurus rex. King of the Giant Lizards. Uncle agreed. And that, my friends, is how the G-rex was born.”

  “Actually, it hatched out of an egg,” cracked Sister.

  “Wow,” breathed Fred. “Ferdy got to name the greatest of all the meat-eating dinosaurs! That must have felt awesome, Ferd!”

  Ferdy faked a yawn to hide his urge to grin with embarrassing glee. “Yes,” he admitted. “I did rather enjoy it.”

  Chapter 7

  Another Field Trip

  Papa Bear did agree to drive the Bear Detectives to the desert, and the very next morning they set out in the Bear family’s red roadster. Their plan was simple. First, they would find the mesa from which they’d spied Ralph and the other bears. Then they would climb to the top of it and train their binoculars on the spot where the bears had been. If they could see the big tent where the G-rex bones were stored, then they’d know for sure that Ralph was mixed up in some shady deal involving the fossils.

  The plan may have been simple, but pulling it off wasn’t. Once they reached the desert, everything looked the same. They couldn’t tell one mesa from another. So they were surprised when Lizzy spoke up. “Stop here,” she said, peering through her binoculars. “I think I see our mesa.”

  Papa insisted on going with the cubs. They had already filled their canteens from the water cooler in the trunk, so they put the top up on the roadster, locked the doors, and set off across the desert. But when they reached the top of the mesa and looked all around, nothing seemed familiar.

  “What do we do now?” said Sister.

  “Wait a second,” said Fred. He opened his map and spread it out on the ground. “It said in the newspaper that the fossil site is in a place called Dead Bear’s Gulch. Aha! Here’s Dead Bear’s Gulch on the map. Now all we have to do is figure out where we are so we’ll know what direction to go in. When we get there, we might recognize the place.”

  “Okay,” said Sister. “So where are we?”

  Fred examined the map for a while but got nowhere. Ferdy joined him, and they got nowhere together.

  “Step aside, you two,” said Papa. “It takes somebody with experience at map reading to solve a problem like this.” He knelt down and studied the map for a long time. Finally, he stood up. “I’ve got it!” He pointed off into the distance. “See that mesa way over there?”

  The cubs nodded.

  “Well,” said Papa, “we’re right on top of it.”

  Sister put her hands on her hips. “Papa!” she said. “Think about what you just said!”

  “Now hold on, Sis,” Brother broke in. “I think the desert sun is making us all a little goofy. We’d better get back to the car before we get even more lost.”

  Papa agreed, and they headed for the car. But when they reached it, they couldn’t get in. Papa had left the keys in the ignition.

  “Is there a spare key?” asked Brother.

  “Of course there is,” said Papa.

  “Well, where is it?” said Sister.

  Papa looked at the ground and mumbled, “Hanging from a nail in my workshop.”

  “That’s just great!” cried Sister. “Now what are we gonna do? Our canteens are almost empty, and the water cooler is locked in the trunk!”

  Papa and the cubs could already feel their throats going dry. They looked up to see vultures circling overhead.

  But then they heard a truly wonderful sound: the drone of an engine coming down the highway.

  Chapter 8

  Saved!

  Moments later Papa and the cubs saw that the droning engine belonged to a bus—a great big tour bus kicking up dust as
it raced along the highway.

  “Must be headed for Las Grizzly,” said Papa. “Full of gamblers from Big Bear City.”

  But as the bus neared, they could make out what was printed in big letters above the windshield: DEAD BEAR’S GULCH.

  “Dead Bear’s Gulch?” said Brother. “Wow. Some tour company sure acted fast to cash in on the fossil find.”

  Papa and the cubs jumped up and down and waved. The bus pulled to a stop. Behind the wheel was a bear wearing a straw hat and green jacket.

  “It’s Ralph Ripoff!” said Sister. “He’s organized tours to the fossil site!”

  Ralph hopped down from the bus and tilted his hat against the sun’s rays. “Well, well,” he said. “If it isn’t Papa Q. Bear and my favorite cubs. Car trouble?”

  “Er … not exactly,” said Papa. “Key trouble.”

  Ralph chuckled. “Locked yourselves out, did ya? Why don’t you hop on the bus and take the tour? On our way back I’ll tow your car. And I’ll only charge you half price for the tour. Of course, I’ll have to charge you the other half for the tow job. That’ll be twenty dollars each. Cash or credit?”

  Grumbling, Papa paid Ralph in cash. Seated next to Brother, he was still grumbling when the bus headed off down the highway again. “Your papa’s a real dummy,” he said. “Locking us out like that.”

  Ferdy leaned forward from the seat in back of them. “I disagree, Mr. Bear,” he said. “In fact, it was quite a brilliant thing to do. If you hadn’t locked us out, we’d be on our way home now, having accomplished nothing. But because you did, we’re getting a second chance to do what we set out to do: determine if the fossil site is where Ralph was seen the other day.”

  Papa’s frown faded. He grinned at Brother. “Ferdy has a point,” he said. “I guess locking us out of the car was a pretty smart move, after all.”