Stardust And Shadows

by Janelle Taylor

  “I’ve viewed many of the tapes I had my spies make of you during the auctions. I have also read your complete file. I must admit Varian and his staff did an excellent job of selecting, training, and documenting you. I’ve heard only good reports about you from those who met you along your journey. You make an excellent impression on everyone.”

  And I must admit, you’re quick, Varian. You cover yourself faster than a flash flood does the Texas desert. “Thank you for the compliment and confidence.”

  “You don’t like talking about the days before you came here, do you?”

  Keep up the deceitful probing and you might hear something you wish you hadn’t evoked. “Why should I? My life and career were torn apart by that bas—beast. I lost my home, my friends, my job, my possessions, my … everything. I was on my way to a party when three men in silvery jumpsuits and impenetrable helmets surrounded me, drugged me, and kidnapped me. I awoke on a starship heading out of my galaxy, destined to become a captive mate to an alien. He destroyed every new beginning I made. As I was recovering my courage, self-esteem, and a measure of happiness, he yanked them from me. First, he did it on Earth. Then, he did it on his ship; those were the only friends and only life I knew for a long time. I was terrified and confused, but people like Martella, Tris, and Nigel made it better for me. Varian and I fought until I didn’t have the strength or will to defy him and his plans for me anymore. I wound up in sickbay once for provoking him to strike me during an attempted escape attempt. I quickly learned he was telling the truth about where I was and about there being no escape or rescue for me. It gave him great delight to wield his power over me.”

  Following a glare of coldness at that memory, she continued. “He duped us into thinking he had let these huge spiders eat one of the girls. Later I saw her sold on Kudora and learned scarfelli are trained for terror tactics. Yes, I did have privileges the other captives didn’t: nice quarters, clothes, extra training, and special treatment, but he was only grooming me as bait for you and a cover for his mission. He threatened to sell me to a terrible beast if I didn’t do whatever he ordered. Later he said he’d been joking to halt my defiance, but I have no doubt he would have carried out his threat if I hadn’t complied. Then, he began his romantic assault. He was constantly teasing and taunting me. If I let him kiss me, he was furious and mocking. If I refused, he was furious and vindictive. He swore neither he nor his crew were allowed to touch any of us captives, and I foolishly believed him. I realized it was safer to be his friend and student than his enemy. My change of behavior seemed to satisfy him for a while. I thought it was foolish not to take advantage of my lessons when I needed everything I could get to help me adjust and survive in an alien environment. After he … we … You know what I mean. I didn’t think he would sell me to another man, not the affectionate way he acted toward me. Heavens, that was the worst experience of my life, standing half naked before a crowd of strange men listening to myself being auctioned to the highest bidder like a piece of merchandise. He led me to believe I was Draco’s charl. I tried to make a new life there because Draco was so kind and gentle. For the record, Councilman Procyon never touched me.”

  “I believe you, Jana. What happened next?”

  “Just as I settled in, he showed up one night and ripped my new life apart. I was drugged. When I awoke, I was back with him, at his grandfather’s on the planet Eire. He even went so far as to say he would keep me forever and I would become his mate. He romanced me at his grandfather’s. Even Kadim Tirol aided his deceitful ruse by telling me how much Varian wanted me and how he was risking his life to save my world. Then, I was drugged again and awakened to you. He won’t stay out of my life. He won’t allow me to get settled anywhere and find peace. For some reason, he wants to destroy me. I could have fallen in love with him, but he taught me to hate, mistrust, and pity him.”

  “Pity? I’ve never known anyone to pity Varian Saár. Explain.”

  How could Varian sit there, she fumed, and calmly listen to her say such things without defending himself? How could he hear all those charges against him and still risk creating another one with this foul deception? Did he believe he had her so cleverly duped that she was only safeguarding herself from Ryker’s wrath? “Yes, pity him, becaue he has no feelings, no scruples, no conscience, no compassion, no honor. His war with you has made him that way. What is a man without such qualities? I would trade anything to have my innocence and ignorance back. He held me so tightly in his evil clutches and dazzled me with his mind-controlling and spell-binding Moondust that I was too cowardly and blind to defy him. I wish my life could be as it was before he kidnapped me and changed me forever. He lied to me from the start. He said I would be accepted and cherished as a charl, and I haven’t found that to be true. He said if I was nice to him, I would be fine, and I haven’t been. Somehow I antagonized him no matter what I said or did. He was suspicious and angry if I was receptive, but he was the same if I was resistant. He was contradictory and cruel. I could never please him. I won’t lie to you, Ryker; I was mesmerized by him for a while. He’s very appealing when he turns on his charm. He possessed such enormous power over me, even over the air I breathed, over my fate, my life. I feel as if I’ve been sprinkled with that minddazing Stardust and can’t think clearly or engulfed by Shadows and can’t find my way back to safety and sanity. Moondust and Stardust—such soft and pretty names for such insidious and lethal chemicals.”

  “You sound as if you know him well and hate him.” “How could any woman in her right mind love a man like that?”

  “Are you in your right mind, Jana of Earth?” She laughed skeptically. “According to you, Ryker, I’ve lost part of it, perhaps a good part of it. How much more will I lose here with you? What do you want from me? Can I trust you?”

  “Varian’s taught you to be distrustful of all men.”

  “Then prove to me why and how I can trust you.”

  “I will, Jana, given time and the opportunities.”

  “I hope so, Ryker, I truly hope so.”

  As they left the house later, Jana noticed the rondure center of the dwelling was of an unknown beige material. Four smaller semispheres stuck out from it like legs on a fat spider and connected to the largest one via passageways. Reflective transascreens were flush with the smooth surface, and each area possessed a large skylight. She knew three of those minidomes held bedrooms where she now slept, the dining area, and the greatroom for relaxing and entertaining. Others, he had told her after breakfast, consisted of the kitchen and storage locations. The unusual structure sat on a thick base similar to a concrete foundation slab.

  As if following her line of thought, the alien said, “It’s built on a platform that lowers itself underground in case of an attack. So is my private complex. Each has enough supplies to keep several people alive for a long time. A tunnel connects the two structures.”

  “If there was an attack, how could anyone last beyond the lengthy contamination that would follow total destruction?” she asked.

  “Each area, in case the tunnel collapsed, holds an escape pod, an airtight one with enough power and supplies to get us away from this sector.”

  “What about your workers? How would they escape?”

  “Most of them are robots or androids. They appear human in looks, but you can always tell one by his or her yellow eyes. Human personnel are mainly shuttle pilots. Most stay away on deliveries. Those few caught here during an attack will have time to escape in crafts before the self-destruct sequence completes itself. Survival is one reason I use androids; the other is their total loyalty to me and my work. Any attempt to dismantle them for their memory banks results in instant explosion.”

  “What if someone found the right command code and ordered them to dump their memories into a computer?”

  “They respond only to my voice and code. No matter how good an imposter is, my voice cannot be matched perfectly, not even by computer. Nor does anyone know the right code for extracting informati
on.”

  She eyed the many structures within sight: warehouses, greenhouses, a stable, huge shuttlebay, and the alien’s private complex with many laboratories. Plants and trees and flowers seemed to grow in every available location to create a colorful and breathtaking setting. Walkways connected the buildings in an artistic design based on function as well as looks. “This planetoid is so large and so beautiful,” Jana commented. “I don’t recall seeing the outside before.”

  “Beyond your vision capabilities are gardens and animal dwellings, some for raising and feeding specimens and some for human consumption. I saw on your file that you enjoy riding. I have a large stable of esprees, our specie of horse. Would you like to do that when you’re stronger?”

  “Yes. One of the things I lost on Earth was a fine, Appaloosa stallion named Apache. You probably know I was raised on a ranch in Texas, which I inherited after my parents were killed in a plane crash. My father was also involved in the oil business. I don’t know which he loved more, raising stock or bringing in an oil well.”

  “Your file said you owned an aeronautical company.”

  “Yes, Stacy Aerospace Firm. I inherited that from my mother. We design and manufacture equipment and parts for satellites, missiles, shuttles, and spacelabs, at least as we know them at our level: things like flight control systems, radar, sensors, and probes. I really don’t know much about all that, but I held on to the firm because of the medical and scientific breakthroughs involved in outer space research. A great deal of knowledge and technology comes from space flights, but of course you know that.”

  “How did you get into researching cures for terminally ill children?”

  “I saw several children of family friends die from incurable diseases. One of them I had babysat for years. I was a volunteer at our local hospital—a Candy-Striper—when I was younger. I saw children on telethons—television programs to raise money—who gripped my heart with their sufferings. I had always loved science. I entered every science fair our school promoted. Once I did a life-support exchange between mother and fetus using a tiny doll inside a plastic bubble, complete with a straw for an umbilical cord, attached to a larger doll as the mother. I had charts with diagrams and information and little jars of mouse fetuses in different stages of development that I had gotten from a researcher friend of my father. The school thought the project was too advanced and detailed for a sixth-grader to have executed alone so I was disqualified. I think it was the subject of my paper and the demonstration that made them uncomfortable.”

  “I can imagine. Tell me, Jana of Earth, how did you get so far in twenty-four years?”

  Jana pushed windblown wisps of her tawny hair with its silvery highlights from her face as she realized she hadn’t even told such things to Varian during all their days together. He had never asked or seemed interested, whereas a scientific man like Ryker … Don’t confuse yourself about who’s standing here with you, J. G.! “I went to school year round. I loved the work, and I did extra projects. I majored in biochemistry and did graduate work in microbiology and chemistry. I worked at the Baylor Medical Complex until graduation. I went home for a few months to see my friends and to handle my business and personal affairs before relocating to Baltimore to take a research position at Johns Hopkins. I was to start there the day I reached Draco’s world, to begin life as a captive charl rather than saving children’s lives on mine. My will left everything I own to research for terminally ill children. I suppose it’s been executed by now. At least something good came from this evil.”

  “I’m sorry, Jana, those must have been terrible losses for you.”

  “Along with my freedom and pride.”

  “But you have those back now.”

  “Do I, Ryker? Is limited, controlled existence really being free? Does being at the beck and call of another person allow for pride?”

  “I hope so, Jana. It can if you allow it. All of this explains why Dr. Zarcoff and Lieutenant Sanger were so interested in you.”

  “What do you mean? How do you know that?”

  “It’s no secret both of Varian’s officers and good friends wanted him to keep you. I saw you on tape with Nigel Sanger several times. It was easy to see you two were friends; that’s natural between two scientists. It’s to my advantage they didn’t convince him to keep you. I also recall your file listing caritrary as the color of your eyes. I can see why Dr. Zarcoff did so. As with that precious gem found on the planet Caguas, your eyes are a coalescence of blue, green, and violet. I’ve never seen eyes this shade in our world: a kaleidoscope of magical allure and sweet mystery. Despite the fact you’ve been mostly inside for months, your skin still appears kissed by an adoring sun. The first time I saw you, I didn’t think a female so beautiful and perfect could be real. It’s understandable why every man in the Universe would desire you.”

  “That’s an exaggeration, but thank you. Every male alive couldn’t find the same female desirable. I know I’m attractive and have certain charms. I have intelligence and strengths and good traits, but I’m not matchless or either a goddess or an angel.”

  “That’s what you told me upon your arrival. As I said that day, you’re far too modest, and you’re wrong.”

  “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, as we say on Earth.”

  “And everyone who beholds you thinks as I do.”

  “But doesn’t feel as you do, whatever that is.”

  When he chuckled and seared her with his jungle-green gaze, Jana asked, “Why are you talking this way to me? We hardly know each other.”

  “Isn’t this how people get acquainted on your world: chatting and observing? Am I being improper? Am I making you nervous?”

  “I find it surprising and unsettling that you’re being flirtatious.”

  He laughed heartily this time. “I’ve certainly never been accused of being flirtatious before. It must be your potent effect on me.”

  “You’ve read my file and questioned me. What more do you need to know? Surely we’ve covered all this ground before in the past week.”

  “Yes, but I like hearing about you from your lips and learning more than is recorded about you. Your file said nothing about childhood experiences or why you got involved in research, so I’ve already learned something about you that no other person here knows. Everything we experience in our lives helps to mold us into the people we are. I want to learn all I can about you, Jana of Earth, even the smallest detail.”

  “To see what really makes me tick?” He seemed to reason on her words for a time, then grinned when he grasped her meaning—a sexy grin.

  “Maybe I’ll come to learn and use Earth slang, too. There’s always something other people can teach us. I’m also trying to relax your doubts and fears by creating a genial atmosphere between us. There’s no need for them, not here, not with me.”

  “That’s your opinion, but I suppose you’re always right.”

  He shrugged and smiled. “I’ve made a few mistakes in my lifetime, but not many. One bad one was with you the first day we met. I don’t want to repeat it or to make another. Wait here a moment while I unlock the complex. We have something important to do in there.”

  What, the anxious Earthling wondered, is in store for me next?

  Chapter Three

  Jana stayed where she was while the man approached his complex and entered the code to open the door. She joined him when he summoned her and walked beside him down a hallway and into a laboratory. He lifted a set of notes in his language and went into an adjoining room, telling Jana he would only be a minute or two.

  While he busied himself, Jana watched him. He seemed to know what he was doing and seemed at ease in the surrounding. He measured several liquids in tall cylindrical tubes and poured them into various plants, then apparently recorded the amounts and types used. She strolled to one exquisite flower in a pot: Tarkitilae Moosi. Its lacy petals in shades of pink with vivid dots were lovely, but viewing it brought anguish to her heart.

  �
�Eyes of Kimon, Tarkitilae Moosi,” the man said over her shoulder. “Kimon is our mythological Goddess of Love and Beauty. In her pictures and statues, you look like her. Perhaps you are her incarnate. That would explain your magic and allure. Would you like to have it for your room? I’m finished with it.”

  “It’s magnificent, but no thank you.”

  “You can accept a gift from me, Jana.”

  “It’s Varian’s favorite, so I don’t want it around me.”

  “I understand.”

  As he returned to his task, Jana remembered the botanical garden on Varian’s ship; perhaps that was where her cunning love learned so much about plants that he could carry off this part so well. She approached an odd-looking one with a huge orchid-type flower. Just as she leaned over to smell it, Ryker seized her around the waist and yanked her backward. Startled, she shrieked and struggled for freedom, and he released her.

  “It hides a vicious little creature, Jana. Watch.”

  He fetched a small chunk of raw meat and held it toward the blossom with long tweezers. The petals opened and a wormlike creature shot out to snatch the meat. It vanished behind the velvety petals once more.

  “He can take a nice piece out of your finger or nose; has razor-sharp teeth and a hefty appetite for flesh of any kind. They co-exist, can’t survive without something each produces. Beauty and savagery bound as one by mutual needs. This is only one of the reasons you can’t work with me until you learn your way around such things. You aren’t familiar with our specimens and chemicals. Besides causing a terrible accident, you could get injured or even killed. Once you’re trained, you’ll be an excellent assistant, can even work on your own projects. Come along.”

  Jana tagged behind him down the hallway into another laboratory. She watched him pull on thick gloves that reached his elbows and approach a glass case on the floor, which was coated with a deep layer of sand. She inched forward with caution and alert this time. His protected hand searched the dirt until she saw a movement which he pursued with speed and accuracy, grasping the neck of a creature that sprung from its hiding place and struck his glove. She squealed in surprise and hurriedly stepped backward.