The Pleasure Series: Complete Box Set

by M. S. Parker

  “I'm here,” he whispered fiercely. “I have you and I'm never letting go. I've got you.”

  I woke with tears still streaming down my cheeks.

  Chapter 6

  I studied my reflection with a critical eye. I was paler than usual, but it was winter, so I doubted anyone would think anything of it. I'd managed to hide the dark circles under my eyes with make-up and even though my clothes felt a bit loose, I hadn't lost enough weight for it to really be noticeable to anyone. I'd chosen one of my few conservative outfits: black dress pants, a plain white blouse and a black jacket. I'd always thought that it made me look like some sort of government agent, so I supposed it was my best bet. I didn't, however, have any decent shoes to wear, not in this kind of weather anyway. It had been snowing on and off all week and all of Fort Collins was blanketed in at least six inches of the stuff. No way was I wearing anything other than boots.

  As I headed downstairs, I rubbed my palms against my pant legs. I wasn't sure why I was nervous. I was only meeting with Agent Matthews. It wasn't like I was being taken in for questioning or even having to face Christophe. It was only a job interview.

  Right. I snorted a laugh, earning a disapproving look from the woman standing next to me at the bus stop. I ignored her. A job interview with the FBI. It still didn't seem real.

  The bus dropped me off across the street from the police station and I gave myself a moment to steady my nerves before crossing and heading inside. The officer at the desk gave me a polite smile and pointed me towards the office Agent Matthews was using. I had to admit, it was an advantage to having changed my appearance. If I'd come in with my usual dress and blue hair, I doubted I would've been sent straight back on my own.

  “Miss Lang.” Agent Matthews stood as I entered the room and held out his hand. I shook it and he motioned for me to have a seat. “Thank you for coming in.”

  “I have to admit,” I said as I sat. “I hadn't seen this coming.”

  He grinned, leaning back in his chair. “Trust me, I hadn't either.”

  “Then where did this come from?”

  “You told the ADA that you'd hacked into some government systems to erase your previous identity as well as damaging any files containing your name or image,” he began. “So I decided to take a closer look at you.”

  I folded my hands on my lap and hoped that the agent couldn't see how hard I was gripping them together.

  “Now, I'm no computer expert, but I had one of my guys who is look into it. From what he tells me, you're not just good, Miss Lang. You're exceptional.”

  I didn't know how to respond so I settled for a simple. “Thank you.”

  “I also see why you need the immunity.” He had a half-smile on his face. “If you wanted to, you could do some serious damage to national security.”

  I shrugged, neither admitting nor denying it. He was right, of course, but I wasn't dumb enough to say it.

  “We could really use someone with your skill set in our cyber-crimes division.”

  I started to say that I didn't want to track down hackers and terrorists, no matter how much that might be a good thing, but he held up a hand and I let him finish.

  “Specifically, I want you to work with a sub-division of cyber-crimes, one specifically formed to track down and stop child pornography.” He paused to give me a moment to absorb that and then kept going. “Technology is always a few steps ahead of the law and we're working to catch up. Part of the problem is that we're constantly reacting to things rather than going on the offensive. We don't have anyone who can keep up with these guys, so we're always trailing behind, picking up the pieces and hoping we get lucky once in a while and manage to catch someone.”

  That didn't surprise me. The people who ran sites like that, who distributed films, they were usually smart. The dumb ones got caught because they screwed up. Men like Christophe could give us names of some of the higher ups, but I didn't doubt they'd be gone before the FBI got to them. Lily had told me that the man who'd run a lot of that stuff for my mom had gotten away.

  “So that's what you want me for,” I said. “To find these guys faster than they realize it.”

  Agent Matthews nodded. “We need you to track these guys, find out where they are. If possible, find where the kids are so they can't be used as leverage for lower sentences.”

  “And your bosses are aware of my...past?” I asked.

  He nodded. “Once I explained to them what you'd managed to do, they were definitely willing to overlook previous offenses to get you on our side.”

  “Does that mean if I decline the offer, you're going to pursue a case against me?” It wasn't that I didn't trust the government, but I knew there were a lot of people who were willing to do whatever it took to get what they wanted. Since they wanted me, I needed to know the lengths to which the FBI would go.

  “No.” His voice was firm. “I don't work like that.”

  My estimation of Agent Matthews went up even more. “What if your bosses decide they'll do it without you?”

  He gave me a half-grin. “I trust you're good enough not to have left tracks.”

  “I am.”

  “Then all they have is a hypothetical statement that I made based on what I'd heard you tell the ADA after signing the immunity agreement. I'm pretty sure a half-decent lawyer would be able to get that thrown out without a problem.”

  “You do know that a lot of the restrictions in place are the reasons why people like that are able to get away,” I said.

  “I know.” A flash of anger went through his dark eyes. “Laws meant to protect the innocent have become the same ones that the guilty hide behind.” He looked at me. “That's why we need you. You're good enough to work within the system and still get results.”

  Not as good as the results I could get outside the system, I thought, but he was right. I was still faster than most, if not all, the techs the FBI had working for them. I might've had confidence issues in some areas, but this wasn't one of them.

  “Does that mean I'd be working from the field office in Denver?” I asked. I wasn't sure how I felt about that.

  “If you want. Or you could go to DC and work with the main task force there.”

  “What about freelancing?” I nearly blurted the question out and wasn't sure why. “It's not like I'd be going on raids or anything, just doing the computer work. I wouldn't have to relocate that way.”

  Agent Matthews studied me for a moment, and I knew what he was thinking. He knew something was going on with Rylan and me, or at least he'd known it when it had been true. The thing was, I knew I should've jumped at the chance to move. Denver was still near the mountains, which I loved. DC was back on the East Coast, but north enough not to feel like Florida. Either one would be far enough from Rylan that I wouldn't risk a random run-in, or him finding me...if he started searching again. It'd be a fresh start, something that I should have wanted. That I did want.

  But I wasn't ready to say good-bye to Fort Collins yet. Sure, I had things to work through here, but this had been the first place I'd ever chosen to be. At the moment, the city itself was the closest thing to a home that I had.

  “I'm sure I can convince my bosses to set up a freelance agreement, at least for a few months. Call it a trial period. We can feel each other out and see how we all work together.”

  “That sounds good,” I said. “As for Denver or DC...I'll think about it.”

  Chapter 7

  After my interview with Agent Matthews, I headed over to a small grocery to stock up on some food. I hadn't had much left in the apartment to begin with and even though I hadn't had an appetite over the past week, I'd managed to finish it all anyway. I didn't know if I was going to go back to my apartment or not, but I'd need food either way. By the time I finished, it was almost noon and I took a cab back to the hotel, not wanting to have to deal with my bags on a bus.

  My arms were full enough that I didn't see the figure waiting by my door until I was a couple feet away
. I caught my breath as I looked up, seeing only the outline of a tall, muscular body at first. Then the rest of it registered as he stepped out of the shadows and I saw light brown hair and eyes the color of moss. It would have been a handsome face if it hadn't been scowling at me.

  “Zeke.” I tried not to sound unwelcoming, but it wasn't easy.

  Zeke Wesson was one of Rylan's oldest friends and, like Rylan's family, didn't like me. In fact, I was pretty sure he hated me. I'd tried to be polite to him, for Rylan's sake, but Zeke had made it almost impossible. Our last confrontation had been at Christmas when he'd come into the house while Rylan had been visiting his family. If Rylan hadn't come back when he did, I suspected things would've gotten physical. Zeke had me backed up against a wall, getting in my face, and I'd almost had a panic attack.

  I was especially glad now that I hadn't told Rylan what had happened. At least he had his family and friends to stand with him through this. I would've felt even worse about what had happened if I'd ruined things between Zeke and him, even though I knew Zeke was probably reinforcing all of the negative things Rylan's family was already telling him.

  I'd just never expected Zeke to be helping Rylan find me.

  “Excuse me,” I said as I stepped past him to get to the door. I half-expected him to grab my arm, but he didn't. He did, however, follow me into the hotel room without an invitation.

  I set the bags down on the small table in the corner of the room and took off my coat. I left the boots on even though they were dripping snow and water onto the carpet. I was only average height and the boots didn't give me more than an inch or so, but I remembered what I'd been wearing the last time I'd seen Zeke – sexy lingerie under a robe, an outfit meant for a romantic day with Rylan – and I refused to let myself feel anything close to vulnerable. Bare feet wouldn't help with that, so I kept the boots on.

  “How'd you find me?” I had a million other questions that I wanted to ask, but that was the one I needed the answer for first. Mostly because I wanted to make sure it wouldn't happen again if I needed to move.

  “That's what you're going to ask me? Really?” He laughed, a bitter, brittle sound. “You don't want to know how Rylan is?”

  “I do,” I said quietly. I set my jaw. I couldn't show weakness, especially not to Zeke. “But I need to know how you found me first.”

  “Rylan hacked your credit card to try to find you.”

  Of course he had. I'd known he could do it, so I'd made sure I was only using cash. Fortunately, I kept a decent amount on hand for any electronics I might need that had been obtained in less than legal ways.

  “I figured a girl like you would be using cash,” Zeke sneered at me.

  “A poor girl or a smart one?” I snapped. “Though I suppose not smart enough since you found me.” I didn't add what I thought of his intelligence, but it was implied.

  “He's spent the entire week trying to find you. Making calls, looking online, going to your apartment. He said if he didn't find you soon, he would hack the phone company and try to ping your phone.”

  Shit.

  I'd taken Agent Matthew's call here and I'd called Dr. MacLeod. I needed to change hotels and buy a burner cell. If Rylan was going to those kinds of lengths to find me, maybe I should take the Denver or DC offer, leave Fort Collins and not look back.

  “Fortunately, I found you first.”

  “You're not going to tell him where I am, are you?”

  Zeke laughed again. “Are you kidding me? I don't want him anywhere near you. That's why I told him I'd check out a couple hotels on foot. I called off work and started asking people if they'd seen anyone matching your description. Imagine my surprise when I found you here, under an alias, paying in cash.” He glanced towards the bed. “You working out of here too? You charge by the hour or take it a full night at a time?”

  “You're an ass, Zeke.” It felt good to finally say it.

  “You walked out on Rylan after everything he's given you and I'm the ass?” He glared at me. “You've got some nerve, bitch.”

  My hands curled into fists, but I pushed down my temper. I wasn't going to let him bait me. “I didn't take anything of his,” I said. I swallowed hard at the memory of the gift I'd left behind, a beautiful silver and sapphire necklace with matching earrings. Beautiful – and expensive. If it had only been beautiful, I would've taken it with me.

  “Whatever.” Zeke rolled his eyes.

  He really did act like a spoiled child at times. “What do you want, Zeke?” I tried not to sound as tired as I felt.

  “I want to know if you're going to keep fucking with his head.”

  I frowned. “Is he okay?”

  “Okay?” He snorted. “Are you fucking kidding me? No, he's not okay. Called me as soon as he got your note. Two fucking lines.” He glared at me, eyes bright with dislike strong enough to be called hatred. “I tried talking sense into him, but he wouldn't hear it.”

  Every word was like a needle shoved into my flesh, but I didn't stop him. I needed to hear it, needed to know, even if it hurt.

  “I told him you weren't worth it, but he just kept going on and on about how much he loved you and how he needed you. Bullshit.” He practically spat out the last word. “You took advantage of him, used him, and then left when you realized he wasn't going to make you rich.”

  “So which is it, Zeke? Did I fuck him for money or leave because he didn't give me any? I seem to recall you accusing me of both.” My nails were biting into my palms, but I ignored the physical pain. The emotional was worse.

  “You know, I hate seeing Rylan like this, broken-hearted over some bitch. I've seen it before, when Lara turned out to be a lesbian. But he got over her. He'll get over you too.”

  I tried not to let him see how much that statement hurt. “I suppose he will.”

  “But you're not making it easy for him.”

  I almost laughed at that, but I could see that Zeke was serious.

  “I thought he'd give up after a couple days. Take the hint when you didn't answer his calls and texts.” He took a step towards me. “Then you send an email quitting your job, leaving him in the lurch there. I tried telling him that it was just more proof of how little you cared for him.”

  My chest tightened. Rylan couldn't believe that. He had to know how much I loved him. Had to believe that I hadn't left because I didn't love him.

  “But he's stubborn. Won't believe that's the case. He keeps pointing out that you left that fucking necklace behind. Said that if all you'd cared about was money, you would've taken it with you.”

  Which was exactly why I hadn't taken it. I would never have sold it, but no one would've believed it. I couldn't even say it now because Zeke would call me a liar. I didn't feel the need to say it though. It didn't matter what he thought of me, not anymore.

  “Rylan will get over you,” Zeke repeated. “But not for a long time, and not without a fight.”

  I'd known that, of course, but hearing it said made it hit home. This wasn't going to go away. I'd been hoping that his not calling anymore, not being at my apartment, had meant that he'd given up. He'd sulk and be depressed for a bit, but he'd get over it, get over me. What Zeke was saying, though, made it sound like Rylan hadn't given up. He'd just changed tactics.

  “I'm not coming back,” I said softly. The words hurt coming out, but I knew they had to be said. “That's why you came, isn't it? You needed to know if I was going to go back to him.”

  “That's one reason,” he admitted. “And I'm glad you're not. But that's not all of it.” He took another step towards me.

  My stomach tightened. Damn him. “What else could you possibly want?”

  “I know my friend,” he said. “Better than anyone. Better than you certainly.”

  He gave me a look that said he was waiting for me to contradict him, but I didn't say a word, just waited for him to tell me what he wanted. I was suddenly very tired and all I wanted was this to be over. All of it.

  “You said
you loved him,” he said. “Not quite sure I believe that, but if you do, or if you just want to make a break of it, you have to show him what the rest of us already know.”

  “What's that?” The words were choked, but I managed to get them out.

  “That you don't really care about anyone but yourself.” His lips twisted around into what almost looked like a smile. “That he should move on.”

  “I want him to move on,” I said.

  “Me, too,” he said. “And I have a simple solution.”

  I was almost afraid to ask. “What's that?”

  “We fuck.”

  Chapter 8

  When I'd seen Zeke standing in front of my door, I'd imagined a lot of things. That Rylan had sent him here to get me. That he would tell me to stay away even though I'd already made that decision. I'd imagined him screaming at me, calling me names – which he had. I even thought he might try to pay me off. Violence was even possibly an option. There were two things I'd never thought I'd hear coming out of Zeke's mouth, however. One was him saying that he actually thought I was good enough for Rylan, which I knew would never happen. The other was anything along the lines of the words that now hung in the air between us.

  We fuck.

  I was still staring at him, trying to wrap my head around two words that I'd heard before, but never imagine used in the context of Zeke and myself. Him telling me to go fuck myself, yes. Him wanting to fuck me, not so much. In fact, not at all.

  “Are you stoned?” I asked when I found my voice. “Or maybe drunk?”

  “It's the best way to convince him to move on. I tell him I came over here and you seduced me.”

  “And you don't think he'll be a little annoyed that, when you found me, you slept with me rather than telling him where I was?” I still wasn't entirely sure I was comprehending what he was saying. I had to have misunderstood.

  “He won't be pissed at me, if that's what you're thinking,” he said. After a moment's pause, he added, “Or, at least not as much as he'll be pissed at you.”

  I narrowed my eyes, studying his face. I could read people pretty well and I was usually very good at figuring out what people wanted. I might've found it difficult to trust people with good intentions, especially when they were directed towards me, but when it came to sex, I was rarely wrong about what someone wanted. I'd seen lust for me displayed in all sorts of different ways. Denied. Overt. Hidden behind other things.