Living in Darkness (Bloodbreeders)

by Robin Renee Ray,

  The night was getting on when he stood, said his thanks to my mother for the tea, which I swear he never took a drink of, and thanked my father for his company. I watched intently as he headed out the door on his way to the bunkhouse. As he turned to close the door, I noticed that he was staring right at me, only this time there was no smile on his face. Martin’s face had changed, the expression no longer friendly. It was almost frightening—almost. Just watching him walk gave me goose bumps of a fearful manner, because I had no idea that the mere appearance of a person could churn my stomach into knots. The fear from the look he gave me was fleeting, gone as quickly as it came, and it left me wondering what our next encounter would hold. I said goodnight to my parents and headed up to bed, in hopes that he would still be there in the morning.

  Chapter 2

  I could hardly fall asleep that night. All that I could think about were his eyes, and how they seemed to be so different from any other person that I knew. As a farmer's daughter, I didn’t meet many people out of our county, except during the time of our church revival. Folks came from all over to attend the Church of Christ’s three day long revivals. For the most part, they consisted of a bunch of older women with a few older men, but there were always a few young men around in hopes of finding a wife, and believe me, I was always ready to run if I saw one coming my way. That was one of the main reasons that I always hated to go. That and being bored out of my mind.

  I had already gotten comfortable in my bed and was close to falling asleep when the strangest thing came into my mind. I could have sworn that I heard Martin calling my name, but I wasn’t sure because it felt too much like a dream. Go to sleep, Renee, I told myself. You are just thinking about him too hard. Right about then, I heard it again, but it was different this time, much more profound in its clarity.

  “Come to the barn,” he said. "I wish to speak with you.”

  I sat up in my bed to see if anybody else had heard what I had, but no one moved. Even Edna, who was mere inches from me, didn’t stir. I wanted to go so badly, but I was afraid I was just daydreaming; perhaps even wishing it was something I would hear him say.

  "Renee.” I heard again, as plain as if he were sitting right next to me. “Come to me. Please.” That was all it took.

  I knew somehow that Martin was really talking to me in my mind, where no one else could hear, but how I didn’t know. It just didn’t make sense. I put on my housecoat and slipped past my folk's room. I knew my parents would kill me if they knew what I was about to do. I could hear it now. We taught you better than this, young lady! Regardless, I couldn’t make myself stop. I just couldn’t. I closed the door as softly as I dared, then rushed across the yard to the bunkhouse. There must have been a candle burning inside, because I saw a dim light escaping under the large wooden door. I stood there for what seemed like a lifetime, too afraid of what was waiting for me on the other side.

  "Come in, Renee," I heard from inside.

  This time, I was actually hearing the words with my ears. I came to the conclusion that I must not have been daydreaming after all. I opened the door and walked in, trying to pretend that the fine tremble that had just taken over my body was from the cool night air and not from laying eyes on him.

  “How’d you do that?” I whispered. “Call me the way you did?”

  He stood from the bench and began walking closer. Instinctively, I started walking backwards, but all of a sudden he was there holding my arm. I didn’t even see him move.

  “What is your hurry? I just wish to speak with you for a while,” he said, somewhat eerily.

  “Who are you?” I asked, with a hint of panic in my voice.

  He proceeded to gently pull me toward the bench that he had been sitting on, and once there, then pulled my down to sit. I was going with him and why I couldn’t say, but strangely enough, there I was.

  “I find you most interesting,” he said as soon as we sat down. “Please, do not fear me… just relax."

  No sooner than the words left his mouth, I began to relax some, but my heart was still close to bursting. He brought up his hand and began to touch my face. When I pulled back, he said softly, "I would like to feel your skin, to see if you are as soft as I believe you to be."

  At this point, I knew I was blushing, wanting him to touch me at the same time. Despite my fear and everything that I had been taught about being a lady when in the company of a man, I leaned back into him. His touch was strong, yet tender as he ran his fingers down the side of my face. All I wanted at that moment was for him to kiss me. As if reading my mind, he did just that. The kiss was light, just a small brush of his lips against mine. My breath came out a little fast, and more audible than I had hoped, which was a little embarrassing.

  "Do you like my touch, my lady?" he asked.

  I answered with a smile, and bashfully put my head down. He reached up, placing his hand under my chin, and raised it so that I was looking into his eyes.

  "Do not shy from me, Renee. You are far too beautiful." What was he doing to me? I had never once in all my days let a man touch me this way. Yet all I craved was more.

  “Where did you come from?” I asked him. “Why did you come here?”

  “I have come a long way in search of something to take back to my home,” he said, moving a single lock of hair away from my cheek. “And I believe I have found what I was looking for.”

  “So, does that mean you’ll be leavin’ soon?” I asked in my usual naive manner.

  “It is time for you to go back inside,” he replied after staring at me for a long moment. “Dawn approaches, and you need your rest.”

  As soon as the words left his lips, blackness fell over me, and the next thing I knew, I was in my bed, the sun shining brightly through the window. Could I have just dreamed about last night? I asked myself. It seemed so real. I was lying there trying to make sense of it when I heard my mother calling me from the kitchen.

  “Renee, you best be gettin’ up ‘fore your Pa comes back in,” she hollered. When I didn’t come down, she came to my room. “Child, what's wrong? You feelin’ under the weather today?”

  “No, Ma. I’m just tired,” I said as I attempted to get out of bed.

  I tried to stand with all of my might, but just toppled back onto the old mattress. My mother screamed for my father, and he came running.

  “What in tarnation’s goin’ on in…?” That was all he managed to say. The second he saw me, he put his hand to my head.

  “Myrtle, send Sam Jr. into town and fetch Doc Taylor,” he instructed her, then turned back to me. “What happened to you, child? You feel like you caught somethin’?”

  “I don’t know, Pa,” I said shakily. “I just feel a little weak. I’ll be okay after breakfast.”

  Ma left momentarily and came back with a cloth and basin of water. She wet the cloth, and then tenderly started wiping down my face.

  “She's burning up, Sam,” my mother said. “I think she's got the flu. Run and get some more blankets out the closet, would ya?”

  They were acting like I was on my deathbed. I didn’t feel all that bad, I just felt like I didn’t have much strength.

  The doctor got there no more than an hour later and checked me from head to toe. When he was done, he turned to my folks.

  “We need to get her cooled down. Best get some ice from the icehouse, Sam. And I need you to bring in all the clean sheets you have, and some more water, if you would Mrs. Crocker.” As my mother was heading out the door, the doctor called to her. “I think it might be best to send the youngens over to the Miller’s farm for a few days, just in case this is scarlet fever.” That’s when my mother really started to cry. Not many made it with scarlet fever, and they all knew it.

  *****

  Later that afternoon, the doctor stopped back by to bring my mother some salve to rub on me in case I started getting the infamous red spots that are well known with scarlet fever. He gave me the once-over again and rubbed his head.

  “Mrs.
Crocker, I just don’t understand. It ain’t like nothing I’ve seen before.”

  “Doc, please just tell us,” she pleaded. “She's my oldest, and I ain’t looking to lose her.” She desperately covered her mouth with her hands, and practically screamed into them, asking, “Is it scarlet fever or not?”

  “I don’t see no signs of scarlet in her skin, and other than her being weak she seems fine,” the doctor replied slowly shaking his head.

  My mother fell to her knees and cried, until my father went over, took her up under the arm, and sat her in the rocker. The doctor asked my folks if I had been asking for lots of water, and both said no.

  “So what is it, Doc? She can’t look that way, and not be able to get up, if somethin’ ain’t wrong,” my father exclaimed, standing up staring the doctor square in the eye, angrily. “You best not be wrong about this, when you could be treatin’ her the way you should.”

  Doc Taylor almost fell over the table, then tripped on his case, and ended up on his backside on the floor. He, just like everybody in the area, knew not to piss off Sam Crocker. He pulled himself up using the side of the table, while my father stood watching, growing angrier by the second.

  ”Mr. Crocker…I truly ain’t never seen nothin’ like it.” Seeing that it wasn’t enough to satisfy my father, he continued. “Tell you what I'm gonna do. I'll call Doc Macaphee over in Brown County, see if he won’t come up and take a look.”

  “I think that's the best I heard out of ya yet,” my mother said, and with that she got up and came to my side.

  He and my father spoke for a while longer, then the doctor was gone. It was getting late, so everybody that was still at the house—my parents and Sam Jr.—started getting ready for bed. No one asked for supper that night. I know they were all worried about me. Mother came in to see if there was anything she could get me before she went on to bed, but all I wanted was to just fall asleep. I was so tired, my eyes shut as she was talking, and I don’t even remember answering her. Sleep had already taken me, and the dream world was slipping in.

  I don’t know what woke me, but when I opened my eyes, Martin was standing there with his hand extended in front of him, as if waiting for me to reach for it. I started to say something, but like a flash, he had his hand on my mouth with his finger to his lips letting me know to be quiet. He helped me sit up. Then, he very gently put my blanket over my shoulders and picked me up in his arms. I laid my head on his shoulder, and he carried me out of the house. I couldn’t even hear his footsteps, because he walked like he was as light as a feather, even with me in his arms. My mind swam with questions that I couldn’t answer. I kept asking myself, where are we going? Why is it that I can’t say no to this man? All I wanted at that moment was for him to never let me go, to hold me so close that we would melt into one. It wasn’t long until he sat down on a log out by the field, with me in his lap. I looked into his eyes and felt a heat rise from inside me that I had never felt, so intense that my mouth suddenly became dry.

  “I have longed for the hour that I could return to you, Renee. There are things I must know,” Martin said, looking at me passionately.

  I rose in his arms, and kissed his forehead. How was it that in two nights, I could want him so badly, maybe even love him?

  “What is it that you need to know?” I asked.

  "Would you leave your family for me?” he asked, pausing momentarily. “Never to return?”

  “Of course not,” I sat there stunned for a moment. “They need me, and I love them more than my own life.”

  “That displeases me so,” he whispered, frowning down at me. “Renee, you will be mine even if it be against your will. I will be able to explain more of my meaning in the next few nights. You will understand more of this…I promise.”

  I put my hand on his chest, leaning back to look him directly in the eyes and just as I started to protest, my body went limp and darkness was with me once more.

  *****

  The next morning, I awoke to my mother standing over me, crying. Next to her was a man I had never met.

  “Doc Macaphee, what do you think is wrong with her?” my father asked the unfamiliar man.

  “To tell you the truth, Mr. Crocker, I just don’t know. I can tell you for sure it’s not scarlet fever,” he answered.

  My father walked over and tried to comfort my mother, while the doctor began removing items from his bag. “Myrtle, why don’t you go down and make the doc and me a pot of coffee?” he asked. Her eyes quickly darted back to me, and it was obvious that she didn’t want to leave. However, she was not the kind of woman to question her husband’s wishes, so she simply nodded and slowly left my room. My father then turned and watched Doc Macaphee examine me. As he pulled down my lower eyelid and peered into it, he asked my father, “When was the last time she ate?”

  “Well, we got some tea down her yesterday, but that was all she’d take.”

  “In all my time, I ain’t never seen nothing that would turn a healthy young lady into a full blown anemic in two days’ time. Especially not one that was up and around just days ago,” the doc said, as he continued his exam.

  “So, how can we fix her, Doc?” he pleaded more with his eyes than his words. “My girl can’t even talk. She’s worse now than she was yesterday.”

  “I would say to take her on into the Brownwood hospital,” Doc Macaphee sighed heavily. “But I really don’t think she’d make it.”

  “And if we just sit here and do nothing? You want us to not even try?” my father said just a little too loud, and my mother came rushing back into the room, wanting to know what was going on.

  “If she makes it through the rest of the day and starts looking better, then we’ll take her on in, first thing in the morning,” the doc said. My father nodded hesitantly, although he still wasn’t pleased. It was about that time that I began to stir. My mother came and sat next to me on my bed.

  “What’s the matter baby? You hurtin’?” she asked. I shook my head, but touched my lips with my hand.

  “You thirsty?” the doctor asked. “Wanna try some tea?”

  I nodded the best I could. What was going on? I was so weak that I could hardly move. I wanted to ask these questions badly, but I couldn’t speak, no matter how hard I tried. As my mother was walking toward me with a cup in her hand, the doctor stopped her.

  “Little bit of Laudanum will help her rest,” he said, mixing the substance into the cup of tea.

  With her help, I managed to get down more than half the cup, and quickly began feeling the effects of the drug. The last thing I remember was the doctor gathering his supplies, and my father stepping out to smoke his pipe.

  Chapter 3

  I woke up later that night, no longer in my bed, but in the arms of Martin, somewhere in the woods south of our farm. I was surprised to discover that I could speak, but before I could ask how it was that I had ended up there, Martin spoke.

  “I am sorry, but I had no choice but to take your voice. I knew it would not have been good if the others had known it was I you were with the past few nights,” he said, then sat on the ground next to the base of an oak tree with me in his arms. “I must finish this.”

  “Finish what?” I sluggishly asked, puzzled at his statement.

  “I will not be able to shield your mind from the pain that I must place upon you this night, my sweet, and for that I am truly sorry. When it is over, the next time that you open your eyes you will understand a great deal more about what I am speaking.”

  “I don’t think I’ll be around much longer for anything Martin, I think I’m dying,” I softly whimpered, fully knowing my death was close at hand.

  “Shhh,” he soothed, pulling me closer to his chest.

  He slowly rocked me while we were sitting on the ground, Martin cradling me in his arms as if we had been passionate lovers for years. He pulled me close—so close it was as if we were one, and that’s when he looked down into my eyes and said, “It is time.” He pushed my hair from my
face, laying me back just a little, and then leaned his face closer to mine. I closed my eyes, waiting for him to kiss me, but what happened instead was the end of my life as I once knew it.

  He bypassed my mouth altogether, whispering the words “Forgive me” in my ear as he nuzzled his face against my cheek. I thought to myself, what on God’s green earth is he doing, and why would he need my forgiveness? He kissed my neck, his lips as soft as the petals of a freshly bloomed rose. I will never forget what happened next. Pain worse than anything I’d ever felt coursed through my body, as each of his teeth sank into my flesh. My eyes flew open as I attempted to scream with the little strength I had left. He gripped me tighter, spoiling my attempts to push him off. My heart began to race faster with each passing second, as my head began to swim.

  I wretched my body, trying to fight harder, but he was too strong. Every ounce of strength seeped from my body as I became limp in his arms. He held me like a lover as I felt my life begin to slip away, and all I could think about was how he had said that I would be with him forever. Then, why God is he killing me? I screamed a silent scream for my mother, while my head fell slowly backwards. Someone help me, was my last thought…then I was gone.

  Martin carried my limp body back to the farm, and placed me in my father’s barn where he knew I would be found.

  *****

  Early the next morning, my brother Sam Jr. came waltzing into the barn, expecting to begin his daily chores no doubt. Instead, he found me lying at the bottom of the stairs amongst the loose hay.

  “Oh my God…Ma… Pa,” he screamed. He snatched up my lifeless body and ran back to the house. My father saw him coming, and knocked everything off of the kitchen table, that had just been set for breakfast. My mother just stood back shaking as my father helped Sam place my corpse upon the table. No doubt she was in shock. She just stood back staring, shaking her head in a manic fashion.

  “Woman, get a hold of yourself and help me,” he said in a stern voice, but she didn’t move.