by S. J. Bishop
A skinny nurse with graying hair finally came up to me, a stack of papers under her arm.
"Hello, Mr. Stone. I’m Nurse Lauren. I hear you’re checking out. Glad you’re feeling better, though you’ll certainly be missed." She smiled at me. Olivia’s jaw tightened as she looked at the woman. The nurse’s smile faded fast and she handed me a bunch of papers to sign.
A second nurse, almost as skinny but much younger and with a sallow face, came up to the station while I was checking out. "That poor girl," she said to Nurse Lauren, who looked up from checking my papers.
"The three-year-old?" Nurse Lauren asked.
The second nurse nodded. "She’s the sweetest little girl ever. Her mom’s worried sick, and I don’t blame her. I don’t know how that child is still alive right now as it is, what with all the medical problems she’s got."
I felt Olivia stiffen beside me. I knew that I shouldn’t ask, especially with her standing right there, but I just had to know. "Excuse me, but are you talking about Lily Hart?"
The younger nurse’s face flushed. "I’m sorry," she said. "I shouldn’t have been discussing it in front of you. It’s just hard sometimes... the things we see."
"I’m not mad. I just wondered if you could give me some information. Her condition... is it really that serious?"
The nurses exchanged a look. "Are you family?" Nurse Lauren asked.
"A friend of the family."
"Well, we really shouldn’t say..."
I flashed her one of my million dollar smiles. "I understand. I’m an old friend of her mom’s. I was just wondering if there was anything I could do to help."
Nurse Lauren’s face softened. I saw Olivia’s hands grip tighter around the bars of my wheelchair.
"I don’t think so," the nurse said. "The child’s very ill. Not to sound cruel, but I honestly don’t think she’ll be able to last much longer."
My heart thumped in my chest, "There’s nothing they can do?" I asked.
"There’s surgery," the nurse said. "It’s risky, but it would probably help."
"Then why don’t they do it?" I asked, horrified that Ava wouldn’t agree to whatever the doctors advised.
"The mom’s trying," the younger nurse said, leaning in. "But it’s expensive. I know she’s talked to everyone in our billing department, but there’s nothing they can do."
"Insurance won’t cover it?"
"No insurance," Nurse Lauren said, shaking her head.
"Figures," Olivia mumbled. I shot her a look. Was she really so cruel that she could continue to criticize Ava despite how much pain she was obviously in over all of this.
"Just how expensive is the surgery?" I asked. I glanced sideways at Olivia just then and it looked like she was about to have an aneurysm her face was so red.
"At least a hundred grand," the nurse said. I let out a long, low whistle. That was a lot of money, but I had a hundred times that in my bank account this very second. I would help Ava, of course. That is if she wasn’t too proud to let me.
"Are we done here?" Olivia demanded.
"Yes," Nurse Lauren said, seeming to remember that Olivia was still there. She smiled at me one last time before Olivia hurled my chair towards the elevator.
"You better not be thinking what I think you’re thinking," she said, as she pushed me through the hall.
"Why not?" I asked, realizing it was no use to pretend.
"Because," she stammered. "You work hard for that money. Why would you just give it away? Is there something going on between you and that Ava person?" She stopped my wheelchair in front of the elevators. The doors opened and she pushed me inside, bumping my knees against the wall. No accident.
"Of course not." But a pang of guilt hit me. "Besides, I’m not even sure why you care so much. The last I’d heard you were dating your director."
Olivia smiled softly. "Over and done," she said. "Just like I expect you to be with your dear old friend."
14
Ava
I walked into Piccadilly’s, my eyes still red. Lily had been released. The worst was over for now. My parents were keeping a close watch on her. It was breaking me apart knowing that I had to act fast. I couldn’t come up with a plan beyond working more hours and selling everything I owned, which was very little. I doubted my 1994 Dodge Spirit would bring in more than two hundred dollars in its current condition or I’d have already sold it.
"Hi Ava," Myron greeted me as I walked into the kitchen. I flashed him a smile. Things had been slightly awkward after our kiss at the hospital, but he’d assured me that he wasn’t expecting anything more than friendship. I’d admitted to him that the kiss had been an act of loneliness and sorrow and he understood. At least, that was what he’d said. Seeing his puppy dog eyes, I wasn’t completely convinced that it had sunk in that I wasn’t into him like that, but it was nice to have someone to talk to.
"Hi Myron."
"Just a head’s up," he whispered, looking around. "Mr. Brewster is on the war path today. Three people called out sick tonight, and he’s mad."
"Oh. Thanks for the warning." I’d called out sick the last couple of nights myself. I hated to lose the money, of course, but I couldn’t just leave Lily alone in the hospital.
"Ava," Mr. Brewster called suddenly, popping out of the kitchen. "Can I see you a moment please?" Mr. Brewster was a short man with a lot of stomach pudge, which amounted to his sometimes being called "Doughboy" by the staff when he wasn’t around. He had strange bushy eyebrows, and waitresses often caught him flirting with young girls who came in with fake IDs.
I hadn’t even changed into my work shirt yet. But I quickly clocked in and went to Mr. Brewster’s office, which was little more than a closet without the brooms.
"Ava," he said. "First off, how’s Lily?"
"Not very good."
My answer seemed to startle him. I supposed he’d only been asking to be cordial, not because he really cared. Now he was stuck for what to say.
"Oh, well that’s unfortunate. I’m sorry to hear that. Listen, Ava, the reason I asked you in here is that you’ve been missing a lot of work lately."
"I know." Oh my god, was he going to fire me? "Lily’s just been so ill.” I stammered. "She only got out of the hospital this morning."
Mr. Brewster shifted his feet, looking uncomfortable. "I’m not a heartless man," he said. "But you know that I have a business to run here. I can’t let everyone call out sick every time something goes wrong in their life."
"This isn’t just ‘something’ that’s gone wrong. My daughter is dying, Mr. Brewster," I said, tears spilling over. "Dying." I collapsed in a nearby chair, my body shaking.
Mr. Brewster hesitated, then I felt him step closer to me, putting a hand on my shoulder.
"Please don’t fire me," I said through my tears. "I don’t know what I’ll do."
He patted my shoulder, trying to comfort me. His hand stopped then began to move around in a slow circle, drifting over to my back. I took in a sharp breath and the tears ceased. My body tensed up, waiting to see how far he was going to take this. I didn’t want to overreact. Maybe he was just trying to be a nice guy, to comfort me. But something about the way he was rubbing my back did not feel like he was a nice guy at all.
"Don’t worry, Ava," he said. "I promise not to fire you. Maybe I could even help a little. I didn’t realize how dire things were for you. Maybe some earlier shifts? Hmm? Would that help?"
"It might," I conceded, but now I was all too aware of Mr. Brewster’s hand as it drifted down my back now, pausing just below the line of my bra.
"I’d only have a favor or two to ask of you. A little side project you could help me with, and I’d pay you for your time, of course." His hand slid lower still on my back. It was just above my hips and his fingers began massaging my spine. I fought back the urge to scream or to shove his hand away. He was really creeping me out, but I was still afraid of getting him mad because I couldn’t even bear to think of what would happen to Lily if I
were to lose this job.
"Mr. Brewster," I jumped up from my seat now. "I-I..." But I was at a loss for words. Part of me couldn’t believe what was happening. I’d worked for Mr. Brewster for two years and he’d never once made a pass at me like he was now. Though I couldn’t help remembering a few waitresses, here and there, who had left their jobs suddenly.Some even in the middle of their shifts.
"Whoa, Ava, relax," Mr. Brewster said. "It’s alright. I don’t bite. He smiled at me, but his teeth were too white. Too sharp.
"Thanks. I’ll think about it." Then I quickly ran from his office. I almost knocked Myron over in the hall. He was standing just outside Mr. Brewster’s office. I felt my face go pale. "Did you hear...?" Myron nodded and my eyes spilled over. As the tears came, Myron drew me into a hug.
"Don’t worry," he told me. "He won’t touch you."
"I just can’t believe he’d do something like that."
"All men are scum," Myron said. "You can’t trust any of them."
I laughed, pulling away from him. "Myron, you’re a man."
"I know," he said smiling at me. Something about the way the light caught his eyes as his lips curled up made me shiver. It was gone just as fast.
15
Carter
I spent a restless night in my bed thinking about Ava and Lily. Three years old. Lily was three years old. The last time I’d been with Ava—with the exception of the night we’d shared before Olivia had shown up and ruined it all—was three years ago.
It can’t be; she would have told me for sure. But when dawn broke I was still awake, unable to quiet my mind from the gnawing thoughts that wouldn’t leave me in peace. I decided it was time to do some investigating.
Thankfully Hannah had talked Olivia into spending the night in her room at our parents’ house. Hannah had called it a pre-wedding girls’ night. Erik,her fiancé, hadn’t arrived from Los Angeles yet, so Hannah was still trying to keep herself entertained, and Olivia was definitely good in that department. She could turn brushing her teeth into a melodrama.
"Hey," I said, finding Hannah alone in the kitchen with a cup of coffee in one hand and her wedding planner in the other. "Where’s Olivia?"
"Still asleep. We had a late night. Were Mom and Dad super pissed at you?"
"Oh yeah," I laughed. "Let’s see... I’m irresponsible. I would deserve jail time if I got it. Drinking and driving is a serious crime. You know, all that good parental lecture stuff."
Hannah smiled at me. "You know, they do have a point about some of it. I mean, you could’ve been killed."
"I wasn’t drunk. The brakes didn’t work." I repeated for the fiftieth time. It was really starting to bug me that no one seemed to take that into consideration. But I guess years of being a partier had given me a reputation—even in my own family. "The only alcohol I had was that glass of champagne you gave me while you forced me to watch you try on dresses."
"It was only one dress," Hannah smirked, trying to hide a laugh. "Which I tried on multiple times."
I couldn’t help laughing along with her. "Hey," I said, getting to the real reason I’d gone looking for her. I sat down, and distractedly gripped my bad hand with my good one. I hadn’t hurt it badly in the accident, but it still ached whenever I moved it too much.
"What do you know about Ava? I mean, I know her daughter’s really sick. Have you talked to her at all?"
Hannah sighed. "I’ve tried, but Ava doesn’t seem to want to talk to me."
"Oh."
Hannah looked at me, a glint in her eye. "Why are you asking?"
I forced myself not to stammer. "I was just curious, that’s all. Ava was always like a little sister—a second little sister—growing up. I just wondered if maybe there was something I could do."
Hannah shrugged. "Sure. I’ve been wondering the same thing. But we can’t help her if she won’t let us."
"Do you... do you know who the father is?" I asked, holding my breath.
Hannah shook her head. "No. So far as I can tell, she’s never told anyone who the father is. I’m not even sure the father knows."
"What makes you say that?" I asked, my breath catching in my chest.
Hannah shrugged. "I don’t really know. It’s just a feeling I get. I popped into her daughter’s hospital room the other day when I was leaving yours. Ava said something kind of strange..."
"What?"
"Oh, it was probably nothing. I’m not even sure it made any sense. She was exhausted."
"What did she say?"
Hannah looked at him with curiosity. "I asked Ava if Lily’s father knew she was in the hospital, and she said yes. But then she said that it didn’t matter. That the most precious flowers died the quickest, and he’d never even know he had a Lily to lose."
I stared at her. He’d never know he had a Lily to lose.
"Yeah," I said, my mind spinning. "You’re right. I’m not sure that does make sense."
"Toldja."
I rose from the table.
"Where are you going?" Hannah asked.
"Just out for some air. I’m taking Dad’s car."
"With all those reporters trailing after you?" But I was already grabbing the keys. "Well Erik should be getting in later with Axel, so make sure you come back around and say hi. Axel Cooper is your best friend, after all, even if he’s getting transferred to Denver.”
"Will do."
I left my parents’ house quickly, intent on getting to Ava’s before I could change my mind about asking her the question that was still plaguing me. Mom looked up from her gardening as I pealed out of the driveway, a frown on her face.
Ava’s apartment was small and in a not-so-great part of town. As I parked the car, I noticed for the first time how old her building actually looked. Brick was crumbling away from the outside and dirt covered most of the windows.
I knocked on her door and Ava’s mom answered. Somehow, I wasn’t expecting to see anyone but Ava at home. I realized now how foolish that had been. If I’d only stopped to think about it, I would have known that, of course, Ava wouldn’t be alone. Not only would Lily be there, but whoever would be watching Lily while Ava was at work.
"Carter," Martha exclaimed, embracing me in a light hug. "Come in. It’s so good to see you again."
"Is that Carter?" a man’s voice echoed from the back. I saw Ava’s father, David, walking towards me with his hand outstretched. I gripped it and pumped it once, feeling the strength the man still had even in his fifties.
"Good to see you, Carter," David said. "Say, got any tips on who I should lay my money on in the Super Bowl?"
I laughed. It didn’t matter that the season had just started. I got asked this question whether it was summer, winter, spring, or fall.
"David," Martha scolded.
"What?" he asked, his eyes portraying innocence. "Carter’s a great player. The 49ers are great. But," he said, a glint in his eye, "you never know. Maybe someone on his team is on drugs, or someone on another team got his girlfriend pregnant and it’s affecting his game. Insider tips are not illegal in football."
"Just insider betting," I smiled. I’d always liked Ava’s father.
Ava appeared from her bedroom just then. "I just put Lily down for a nap. I don’t think—" She stopped when she saw me. "Hi," she said. Her parents exchanged a look.
"I just..." I stammered. "Hannah asked me to come by."
"Oh?" Ava asked. "Does she need something for the wedding?"
"Yes," I said, feeling my cheeks burn. "Um, pictures. She wondered if you had any old pictures of you and her."
"Oh, gee, I don’t know. I can look."
"Sure, that would be great. Thanks."
Ava and I stood staring at each other. The energy in the room had shifted and even Ava’s parents were not oblivious to it. I saw them exchanging glances.
"I can’t look now," Ava said. "I’m on my way to work."
"I know where your pictures are, dear," Martha said. "I’ll look. Don’t you worry abo
ut it."
"Thanks, Mom," Ava said. She picked up her mail that was sitting on the counter and started sifting through it.
"I’ll walk you to your car," I said, looking for an opportunity to get some time alone with her. "That is, if you’re ready."
"I’m not driving today," Ava said, stuffing her mail into her purse and grabbing a jacket. "My car is broken. I’m walking."
"I can drive you." My heart wouldn’t stop hammering in my chest.
"No," Ava said. "I’m fine. Thanks."
"Ava," her mother whispered. "Don’t be silly. Let him drive you."
"I prefer to walk," Ava said. "It’s nice out and I need the exercise."
"Then I’ll walk with you."
"Fine," Ava said. "Only I have to go now." She hurried out the door with hardly a goodbye to her parents and I chased after her.
"Hey," I said, when we were finally alone. "Where’s the fire?"
"I can’t be late," she said. "My boss... it wouldn’t be good."
"Alright, but you can at least talk to me on the way, right?"
Ava slowed her pace. "I suppose."
"Listen, I know the last time I saw you, in the hospital with Olivia... well, she can be a real bitch."
Ava laughed. "I’ll say."
"She’s not all bad. She’s just insecure."
"Is there a point coming?" Ava asked.
"Just that, I’m sorry about those things that she said to you. I know they’re not true."
Ava paused mid-stride and turned to me. "Thanks," she said. Her eyes were wide and so blue that I saw the ocean in them. My breath was hot as I breathed in her vanilla scent. It was intoxicating
"Ava, I’m not sorry about the night we spent together. Are you?"
She hesitated, "I... I don’t know."
Before I knew what I was doing, I leaned towards her and kissed her. Her lips were wet and warm and filled with a sweetness I hadn’t found anywhere else in the last three years and that I hadn’t allowed myself to admit I’d been missing. But she pulled away from me almost as quickly as I pressed myself to her.