Honeymoon from Hell Part I

by R. L. Mathewson

  Perhaps he should look into buying a lock to keep her glasses on her head…

  “Look,” she said, leaning over and grabbed the ice pack off her ankle and tossed it aside so that she could swing her legs over the side of the bed, “my ankle is fine.”

  “You don’t say,” he said dryly as he sat back on the bed and waited.

  “It feels great,” she said with a huge smile, no doubt hoping that it would be enough to convince him that she was more than up for a day at the park.

  It wasn’t, but he didn’t say anything. He just sat back and waited for it. With a little triumphant smile, she stood up, took a step, gasped in pain, hopped around a bit as she mumbled, “Ow, ouch, damn it, ouch!” before she finally returned to the bed, calmly sat back, put her foot back on the pillow, placed the ice pack on her ankle, sighed, and asked, “So, do you want to watch a movie?”

  Chuckling, he grabbed the remote and handed it over to her.

  *-*-*-*

  “Haley?”

  “Hmmm?” she murmured, struggling to keep her eyes open.

  “Are you hungry?” Jason asked as she felt him gently place another ice pack against her throbbing ankle.

  “No,” she mumbled, giving up on opening her eyes and just kept them closed. It was either that or continue sitting there, bored out of her mind.

  Today was probably the most boring day that she’d ever spent on a trip and sadly, she was including all the trips that she’d been on with her parents, whose idea of the perfect vacation was polo matches, fashion shows and cosmetic surgery. They’d spent the last five hours sitting in bed, watching really bad television and eating while she struggled against the urge to stare out the window at the bright lights calling her name.

  “Do you want me to run out and see if I can find you a book to read?”

  She shook her head as she carefully turned on her side away from him, careful not to dislodge the bag of ice resting against her foot. “I’m fine,” she mumbled, deciding that sleeping through the next few days was probably the only way that she was going to survive this.

  “I’m sorry about this, sweetheart,” Jason said as he shifted on the bed and curled up behind her.

  “It’s not your fault,” she reminded him as she tried to decide between dreaming about that rollercoaster ride that she would damn well be going on just as soon as her ankle was better and all the carnival games that she was going to play…and win.

  He sighed heavily as he wrapped his arm around her and carefully pulled her closer. “I’m going to make this up to you,” he promised as he kissed the back of her head.

  “It’s fine,” she said sleepily as she felt herself begin to drift off.

  “This trip doesn’t have to be a total waste,” he said a few seconds later as he kissed her neck.

  “Hmmm?”

  “Well, I was just thinking,” he said, pausing to gently pulled her shirt to the side so that he could kiss the top of her bare shoulder, “that there might be a way to salvage this honeymoon.”

  Feeling her lips tug up into a smile, she asked offhandedly, “What did you have in mind?”

  He turned his head and kissed her neck. “This and that,” he said absently against her neck as he ran the tips of his fingers down her side.

  “Would this plan of yours involve leaving this bed?” she asked around a groan as he moved his hand over her breast and gave it a gentle squeeze as he pressed that large bulge between his legs against her bottom.

  “That’s the beauty of this plan,” he whispered as he gently ground himself against her. “If we do it right, we won’t have to leave the bed for the next four days.”

  *-*-*-*

  “Are you done yet?”

  “No! Just keep your eyes closed,” he said, trying not to panic, but it was a quickly losing battle.

  Shit!

  “Is everything okay?”

  He glanced over his shoulder to make sure that Haley was still on the bed and completely oblivious to just how badly he’d managed to fuck this up. When he spotted her, lying there still wearing the blindfold he’d made for her and that sexy little number that she’d been wearing last night when he’d found her hopping around the hotel room and cursing her bag, he nearly sighed with relief.

  “Everything’s fine,” he said soothingly as he returned his attention back to the Jacuzzi tub only to release another string of curses when he realized that the bubbles were now pouring over the top of the tub and onto the white marble tile floor below.

  Shit!

  Everything was fine. This was not the fucking curse, but just bad luck. They were just having a bit of bad luck that was all, he silently chanted to himself as he reached over and once again fumbled with the controllers for the jets, but he couldn’t figure out how to shut the damn things off. Not knowing what else to do, he reached over and turned the water off, but that didn’t seem to help.

  Shit!

  Desperate to fix this before it ruined everything, he reached over the candles he’d placed around the tub and grabbed the stack of folded towels housekeeping had left for them. He tossed them on the floor to soak up the mess, which probably would have helped if he hadn’t knocked several of the candles down in the process.

  It probably also wouldn’t have hurt if he’d known that bubbles from the bubble bath solution were flammable under the right circumstances, something he was thinking about four hours later as he stood in the crowded parking lot, staring down at the waterlogged, burnt remains of their suitcases that hotel security had dropped at his feet a few minutes ago along with a polite request that they would perhaps be comfortable staying somewhere else.

  “It was a really sweet gesture,” Haley said as she sat on the hood of his truck, shifting the blanket wrapped around her so that she could push her glasses back up her soot covered nose.

  He didn’t say anything, because there really was nothing to say.

  He simply continued to stand there, staring down at their ruined bags as he waited for the fire department to search what was left of their hotel room for his car keys so that he could drive Haley home and put an end to their honeymoon from hell.

  Chapter 8

  “Oh God, will this nightmare never end?” Jason asked, banging his forehead against the steering wheel as she sat there, chewing on her bottom lip as she tried to figure out exactly where they were.

  She reached for her phone only remembering too late that it had been a casualty of the fire. She pushed her glasses back up her nose as she looked around the country road that the detour signs had pointed them towards, idly wondering what the odds of running into Big Foot were. As she glanced over her shoulder into the pitch-black night, she had to admit that they were probably pretty good.

  Then again, their chances of running into an ax murderer were probably high as well, she realized as she discretely reached over and locked her door.

  “Can you see if there’s a flashlight in the glove compartment?” he asked, giving her the distraction that she needed.

  “Sure,” she said, pasting a smile on her face that he probably couldn’t see as she opened the glove compartment and felt her way around until she found what felt like a flashlight. “Found it!”

  “Does it work?”

  “Yes!” she said, smiling as a beam of light suddenly cut through the dreary night only to groan seconds later when the light flickered out, once again leaving them in complete darkness. “Oh.”

  “Shit,” he muttered with a sigh, making her wish that she could see his expression, because she had a really bad feeling where this was heading.

  “I’m going to go find a gas station or something and call for a pickup truck, sweetheart. Stay here and lock the doors,” he announced, confirming her suspicions.

  Yeah, that wasn’t happening.

  As soon as she heard the telltale sounds of his car door opening, she was out of her seat and scrambling after him, uncaring that she was only wearing a soot-stained nightie and a blanket. Before he could shut h
is door, she was jumping out of the car and-

  “Ouch!” she gasped, hopping around on her good foot as she blindly reached out, looking for something to grab onto, only to realize that somehow during the last thirty seconds she’d managed to move away from the truck and her husband and was now hopping around blindly in the mud without the security of her blanket.

  “Haley?”

  “I’m fine!” she promised him as she continued to blindly hop around, desperately searching for something to grab hold of.

  “Where are you?”

  “Close by?” She hoped at least.

  “I see,” he murmured and she really hoped that was the case, because she wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep this up.

  *-*-*-*

  “Haley?” he said, squinting into the darkness.

  “Over here!” she said in between “Ows” and “Owies.”

  Raking his fingers through his hair in frustration, he took a step towards the direction of the last “Owie,” only to stop and glare into the darkness when the sound of the “Owie,” shifted to his right. He took a step in that direction only to come to a halt when the “owies” abruptly changed direction once again.

  “Uh, Haley?” he said, coming to a halt as the direction of her “owies” once again changed. “Think you could stay still for a minute?”

  “I’m trying!” she called out, sounding out of breath.

  “What are you doing?” he asked, keeping her talking so that he could follow the sound of her voice.

  “Ummm, nothing?” she said with an odd squishing sound accompany her words.

  He followed the sounds to his right and then to the left and back again until finally, he had his arms wrapped around her. He pulled her close and pressed a kiss against her forehead as he swept her off her feet and-

  “Oh, shit!” he managed to get out just as the world fell away beneath his feet.

  He managed to tighten his grip around Haley a split second before his feet went out from under him. He hit the ground with a pained grunt, the air rushed out of his lungs from the impact as he did his best to keep his hold around Haley. A pained groan burst from his lips as he lay there in the dark, and apparently in a large puddle, wondering how he’d managed to fuck this up so quickly and so thoroughly.

  Granted, this trip had been a spur of the moment kind of thing, but he’d thought he’d done a damn good job of giving Haley the perfect honeymoon given the circumstances. Well, perfect for her. Haley was so damn easy going, so easy to please and he’d never been happier about that than when he’d had to come up with a honeymoon at the last minute. While most women would have been disappointed with a trip to an amusement park for their honeymoon, Haley had loved it.

  What had started off with a glance at a brochure for New Hampshire had somehow ended with the two of them sprawled out in the mud at five in the morning in the middle of nowhere with no fucking clue how to fix this. Their cellphones were fried, they were wearing the only clothes they had and they didn’t have any blankets, food, or a fucking clue where they were.

  He’d officially just given his wife the most fucked up honeymoon in the history of the Bradford family, and considering all the horror stories that he’d heard over the years from his father, uncles and cousins, that was saying a lot. There really was no coming out of this ahead, he realized, closing his eyes in defeat as he lay there, holding his half-naked wife in a huge puddle in the middle of the night, wondering where he’d gone wrong. If he worked for his father every weekend and picked up a few shifts after work during the week, he should be able to save up enough money to take her on a honeymoon that she would never forget.

  Not that she was likely to forget this one anytime soon, he thought with a groan as the skies suddenly opened back up, forcing him to get up before they drowned. Keeping his arms firmly locked around his trembling wife, he carefully stood up and headed in the direction that he hoped his truck was in because the last thing they needed tonight was to get lost in the woods during a thunderstorm.

  Five minutes and several failed attempts later, he finally managed to find his truck. Grateful that something was finally going in his favor, he opened the door and carefully helped his trembling wife inside, who was actually starting to scare him a bit.

  “Haley?” he said as he climbed in after her, trying not to panic when she didn’t respond. “Baby, are you okay?” he asked, reaching for her only to curse and pull her back in his arms when he felt her body violently trembling.

  “I’m so sorry, Haley,” he mumbled as he ran his hands over her body, desperately trying to soothe her. “I’m so sorry that I fucked this up. I’m so fucking sorry. I’ll make this up to you one day, I promise. I’ll take you anywhere you want to go, sweetheart, and we can forget this ever happened. We can go to Europe, on a cruise, to Mexico, we can….,” he trailed off when he heard what sounded suspiciously like a snort of amusement.

  “Are you laughing at me?” he demanded, his eyes narrowing in the dark as the ungrateful woman in his arms started to giggle uncontrollably.

  “Yes!” she managed to get out on a gasp as she continued to laugh her adorable little ass off while he sat there, rightfully seething.

  How dare she laugh at him and the wonderful honeymoon that he’d worked his ass off to give her?

  Without another word, he picked up his ungrateful wife and placed her back on her side before he folded his arms over his chest and pointedly looked away with a sniff, not caring that she couldn’t see the move. After everything that he’d done to give her the perfect honeymoon and this was how she repaid him?

  “Jason?” his inconsiderate wife said around a snort of amusement.

  “Go away.”

  “I’m sorry!” she said, and he probably would have believed her if she hadn’t started laughing again.

  “That’s it. I want a divorce,” he said firmly, wondering just how hard it would be to get their marriage annulled.

  “Jason,” she said around a snort of amusement as she reached for him, but he pulled away and shifted closer to the door, refusing to allow the vicious woman to fill his head with patronizing apologies and caresses when they both knew that she didn’t mean any of it.

  “I believe we’ve said everything that needs to be said,” he said with a sniff as he once again pulled away from her touch.

  “Jason-”

  “Save if for the judge.”

  “But-”

  “I’ll be damned if I stay in a loveless marriage!”

  There was a slight pause before she said, “A loveless marriage,” in a tone that he did not care for, not at all.

  “I think it would be for the best if we didn’t say anything else.”

  “I see,” she murmured thoughtfully as he sat there, wondering how he’d missed the fact that he’d married such a heartless woman when he felt something wet dropped onto his lap. Frowning, he reached down and picked up the soaked rag.

  “What’s this?” he asked, trying to figure out why she was throwing things at him.

  “My nightie,” she said, sounding bored as he sat there, letting her words sink in and when they did, he slowly dropped the expensive wet rag on the floor of his truck with a murmured, “So, you’re naked?”

  “Completely.”

  “The panties?” he asked, reaching back and grabbed a hold of the wet shirt clinging to his back and slowly dragged it off.

  “Drying on your dashboard.”

  He toed off his waterlogged shoes as he unsnapped his jeans and shoved the soaked, uncooperative material off along with his boxers. This time when he felt her reach for him, he didn’t back away. When he felt her small hand land on his knee, he shifted at an angle and groaned when he felt her talented lips wrap around the tip of his cock.

  Licking his lips, he carefully threaded his fingers through her wet, tangled hair and somehow resisted the urge to the shift his hips when he felt her mouth slowly slide down his cock. With his other hand, he ran his hand over her back, maki
ng note of the cool skin covered in goose bumps before he skimmed his hand over her perfectly rounded ass and found what he was looking for.

  “So fucking wet,” he growled approvingly as he slid a finger inside her.

  “Do you still want a divorce?” she asked as she pulled her mouth free from his cock.

  “I don’t think it’s a good idea to talk to you without my lawyer present,” he explained as he slowly slid his finger out of her only to slide it back in, earning a sexy little moan that had him arching his hips.

  “That’s probably a good idea,” she murmured in agreement as she opened her mouth so that he could slide inside and lose his fucking mind.

  Chapter 9

  “Oh God…”

  Breaths coming faster, she moved her mouth down the large, thick erection sliding between her lips. She loved doing this for him, loved the feel of him sliding in her mouth, the noises that he made as he started to lose control, but more than anything, she loved it when he finally lost control.

  “Baby, stop,” he pleaded even as he continued to roll his hips, sliding his cock inside her mouth.

  She gladly took it as she reached between his legs and gently cupped his balls in her hand. She ran her hand over the cool silk skin, gently squeezing them as she allowed her teeth to graze the underside of his cock, earning a loud pained groan that told her everything that she needed to know.

  He wasn’t going to last very much longer, which made this the perfect time to settle something.

  “You still want a divorce?” she asked, pulling out of reach so that the next time that large cock glided towards her, she could trace the underside with her tongue.

  “I believe we’ve already discussed this,” he said, sliding a second finger inside her.

  “You know that I love you, right?” she whispered as she spread her legs a little wider and pushed back against his hand as she kissed the tip of his cock.

  “Yes,” he hissed in pleasure as she teased the thick, sensitive head with her tongue.

  “Do you love me?” she asked on a gasp as she pushed back against his fingers.