by K. C. Wells
Okay, so using spanking as a punishment? Is so not gonna work!
13 November.
Well, that was a new experience. I just had a medical check-up… as part of my club application! LOL. Apparently everyone has this. Got sent an appointment to go to this clinic—really nice place, btw—and was given a thorough going over by the doc. Clean as a whistle—yay! Just waiting for blood test results, and I’m all done!
Later—night.
I will not scream.
I will not yell.
I will keep telling myself that it won’t be long now until I’m outta here.
God… please tell me I’m adopted. I’m begging you. ’Cause I can’t really be related to that little fuck….
14 November
I needed him tonight. Told him I needed him to make me forget, to just take it all away. And boy… did he….
So he got out these Velcro straps and tied me to the bed. And then…. He started kissing me. That’s it—just kissing. ’Cept it just kept getting hotter. He never even touched my cock, just kept kissing me, sliding his tongue inside, fucking my mouth with it… those kisses went on and on ’til I was shaking, trembling, desperate to come. There were the most amazing noises filling that room, really fucking sexy noises, the sexiest porno soundtrack ever… and it was me making them.
Leo made me come—just by kissing me.
It still makes me shiver.
And then he made me walk into the lounge, come still on my belly, and pressed me against that huge window, my hands flat on the glass. He put his cock against my hole and just shoved that fucker into me, placing his hands over mine.
OMFG…. So there I was, face and chest up against the glass, hands held prisoner by his, ass tilted… and he plowed into me over and over, until I was screaming out “Sir” every few seconds. I was his—totally, utterly his. My body was his to do with as he liked. I gave everything up to him.
Only thing was… it was on the tip of my tongue. I wanted to call him “Master.”
20 November.
I need to write this down, before I forget…. Yeah, like I could ever forget tonight.
What did I learn tonight? Wow… where do I start?
Leo’s been talking about us going to the club. My membership’s come through, and he wants to take me and “show me off”—his words. So he’s been training me… how he’ll expect me to behave once we’re in there. And that’s the weirdest part. ’Cause surely that should feel strange, right? This man is basically telling me how to walk, stand, kneel, sit… he’s telling me he’s going to control everything about me—and that he has the right to do whatever he wants to me.
Well, tonight, there was this one moment…. When I reread some of the stuff I’ve written in here, I realize there’s been a lot of sex. Like…. A lot. And yeah, it’s been fantastic. But tonight, Leo made me put my hands above my head on the pillow while he fingered me, and I wasn’t allowed to move them. Thing was, I didn’t want to move them—I wanted to please Leo. His fingers felt great in my ass—LOL, they always do—but it was different. I forgot about the pleasure he was giving me, and I focused on giving him pleasure instead. And when he was fucking me, I was conscious for the first time of being there for his pleasure, not mine… and that sent chills through me. It wasn’t about me—it was about him.
I was there for Leo. If he’d wanted to fist me in that moment, I wouldn’t have batted an eyelid. I’d have just taken his hand. If he’d stopped midfuck and told me he wanted to strap up my cock so I couldn’t come, that would have been fine. Shit, he could have done anything….
Okay, so I’m only just scratching the surface of submission as I see it, and I know I’ve got a long way to go, but tonight it all came down to one realization.
My body is his to do with as he wishes. He can whip me, slap me, spank me, tie me up—whatever he wants—and I’ll take it, because it pleases him. Oh fuck, I really want to please him, diary.
26 November
Oh. Fuck. Gotta write this down. ’Cause this is fucking huge. How could I not have seen…?
Okay, so I’m meeting Pietro for one of our regular before-work coffeefests. We’re chatting away, shooting the breeze about loads of different stuff—work, the club (think I’m finally going to go there with Leo real soon!), sex—like that surprises you, diary!—and then Pietro starts talking about Miles. Seems Miles wants to collar Pietro.
Now, I got confused. I mean, doesn’t Pietro already have a collar? So when I ask him about this, he blushes and tells me this is a different kind of collar, a more permanent one. Then it turns out there’s a ceremony that goes with getting this collar. As far as I can see, this ceremony is like the BDSM equivalent of getting married. It’s that big of a deal—well, it certainly seems that way for Pietro and Miles. Come to think of it… yeah, Tobias and Noah! Deviations Book 3!
So Pietro’s talking about the ceremony and his Master. Something crossed my mind, and I asked him when Miles went from being “Sir” to “Master” in Pietro’s mind. His reply was when he realized Miles was the most important person in his life. He was talking about how he came to realize he was in love with Miles, and how fucking wonderful he felt when Miles told him he felt the same way. There was this absolutely beautiful expression on his face when he spoke about his feelings for Miles….
And that’s when it hit me.
I know exactly how he feels. I mean, exactly. ’Cause he’d just described how I feel about Leo….
Christ, diary… when exactly did I fall in love with my Dom?
HUMMING quietly to himself, Alex deftly folded the snow-white napkins fresh from the laundry, getting ready to put them on the tables along with the white damask tablecloths and red top cloths. There was a smile on his face that seemed to live there permanently these days.
Alex was happy.
For what felt like the first time in his entire life, he was truly happy. His new life had opened a window for him, and the dazzling sunlight spilling through it spread into all the corners of his world and made everything it touched that much brighter. Well, nearly everything…. Home? Alex didn’t believe in Santa Claus, so he wasn’t expecting a miracle to take place any time soon. He simply kept out of his family’s way, keeping conversations—and the opportunities for them to take place—to a bare minimum. But as for Rob…. Spending time around Leo, getting to know the man, spending a lot of time in his bed—it all seemed to have the positive effect of building an impenetrable shield around Alex, one which seemed able to resist the vicious barbs and jabs of his little shit of a brother.
“Someone’s a happy bunny today!”
Alex glanced toward the door. Pietro was standing at the laundry door, holding two mugs, a wide smile across his face. Alex sniffed appreciatively. Oh, bless him, he thought, as he caught the aroma of green tea with vanilla. Pietro held out one of the mugs, and Alex took it gratefully, straightening his back as his did so—which caused something else to shift slightly. Alex bit his lip. Leo is a sadistic fuck sometimes.
“I’ve been standing here, trying to work out what’s different about you, apart from the huge shit-eating grin, that is.” Pietro’s eyes positively danced with amusement.
Alex said nothing. There was no way he was letting this particular cat out of the bag.
“You’ve not been fucked, I know that much,” Pietro said with a smirk. Alex raised his eyebrows in surprise, and Pietro laughed. “Nah, you always have this blissed-out look on your face the morning after Leo reams your ass.” Alex’s mouth dropped open, and Pietro laughed even harder.
“Seriously?” Alex demanded. “Do you think the others can tell…?” His words trailed off, his cheeks blushing furiously.
Pietro chuckled. “Hell, yeah,” he replied. “But not one of them would dare call you on it, especially not after the Vittorio episode last month.”
This time it was Alex who chuckled. He’d offered an embarrassed Vittorio his apology the following day, which Vittorio had grudgingly accepted. An
d now that Alex thought on it, Vittorio seemed to have learned his lesson. There’d been no more attempts to discuss Alex’s sex life in front of an audience, thank God. And work was better, he couldn’t deny it. His mates were more inclined to laugh and joke around with him, and he knew that stemmed from him standing up to Vittorio.
“Ahhhh.” Pietro’s face wore a triumphant smile. “Got it!” His eyes gleamed mischievously. “You’ve got a butt plug up your ass.”
“Hey!” Alex glanced around nervously, making sure no one was in earshot. “Tell everyone, why don’t you,” he hissed, blushing profusely. He grimaced slightly as he changed position and the plug shifted inside him, nudging his gland. “This was Leo’s idea. Something about focusing me for tonight.”
Pietro gave a quick glance over his shoulder, no doubt looking to see if Luca was on his trail, and then slipped into the laundry room and closed the door softly behind him. “Why? What’s happening tonight?” he asked, clearly bursting with curiosity.
Alex sighed. “Tonight’s the first night I’m going with him to the club,” he explained. It was a big deal—no, strike that—it was a huge deal. In the month since he and Leo had worked out their contract, all their scenes had taken place in Leo’s apartment. Leo had started training him almost immediately, and Alex loved the routine of it all. Getting himself into the correct stance focused his thoughts and allowed him to slip more easily into the right mindset. He was still amazed how easily he’d taken on everything Leo had taught him. But still, his membership card had sat unused in his wallet until Leo casually suggested the previous night that he wanted Alex to accompany him to the club after work.
“Wow.” Pietro’s wide eyes definitely weren’t helping his nerves. “He must think you’re ready for it, or he wouldn’t have suggested it.”
He’d never looked at it from that particular angle. Oh yeah…. “I want to make him proud of me,” he confessed quietly, raising his gaze to look directly at his best friend. Pietro smiled, put down his mug, and grasped Alex in a tight hug. Alex accepted the affectionate gesture, his hands coming up to return the hug. This was the best part about having another submissive as his closest friend—Pietro understood so much of what Alex was going through.
Pietro spoke quietly into his ear, his cheek against Alex’s. “You’ll be fine, Alex.”
ALEX was trying to stay calm, but his heart was beating so fast, thundering so loudly in his ears, he was surprised those around him couldn’t hear it too. Leo was talking quietly to Miles by the stage, and Alex had immediately dropped down onto his knees, remembering Leo’s instructions. His gaze was lowered, his hands rested palms down on his thighs as he sat back on his heels, back straight. The butt plug was still inside him. Alex hadn’t dared ask if he could remove it, and Leo hadn’t said a thing about it. The collar lay snugly around his neck, and at that moment, Alex was so proud to be wearing it. He’d caught the surprised glances of Doms and subs alike when Leo led him into the club, nude, on a leash. Judging from at least some of their reactions, this wasn’t the norm, but Alex had been relieved to see there were other subs in a similar state. He had been absolutely horrified at first when Leo had given him his instructions as to how he wanted Alex to dress.
“You want me to go there naked?” Alex squeaked, staring incredulously, forgetting for a moment that he was speaking to his Dom.
Leo’s eyes widened. “Are you questioning my instructions, boy?” He spoke softly, but there was a dangerous quality to his voice that was suddenly very arousing. Alex’s cock stiffened in response.
“No, Sir,” he whispered. Oh fuck. This was the first occasion that he’d ever spoken in such a way, and he fucking knew there’d be a punishment for this at the end of the night—although it wouldn’t be a spanking. Leo already knew him too well for that. He just hoped to God Leo would spank him at some point that evening. ’Cause Lord knows, Alex was aching to feel Leo’s large, powerful hands on him again.
“You will strip now,” said Leo in a firm tone, “leaving all your clothes here.” He went to a cupboard in the hallway and pulled out a long greatcoat and a pair of knee-length leather riding boots. “You’ll wear this in the car to the club. Once we get in there, you will hand over the coat and boots to Elliott in reception. Apart from your collar and this”—Leo removed a long leash from his pocket, and Alex caught his breath—“you will be naked all night.” His eyes glinted. “Is that going to be a problem, boy?”
Alex took a deep, calming breath before replying, sinking more fully into his role. “No, Sir.” If that was what Leo wanted, Alex would do it. No questions asked.
Leo looked him up and down with obvious amusement, his eyebrows arched. “You’re still dressed, boy.”
Hastily, Alex pulled at his clothing, fingers trembling, until he stood there nude before his Dom, Leo’s eyes moving freely over him. He cupped Alex’s half-hard cock, working it with a firm grip until it reared up, thick and already beading with precome. Alex struggled to keep still all the while, his hands clenching and unclenching by his sides.
Leo pulled something from his pocket and fastened it around Alex’s cock and balls, then pulled it tight. Alex glanced down to see a leather cock ring. Leo had put a cock ring on him. Fuck, it looked almost… obscene. First the butt plug, now this? The man was definitely trying to kill him.
Alex let out a low moan as Leo tugged on his cock. “And, boy?” A firm squeeze ensured Leo had his complete attention. “You don’t come tonight. Not unless I tell you. Understood?”
Alex’s mouth dropped open, but he quickly remembered himself and nodded, swallowing hard. At least now he knew what his punishment was. “Yes, Sir.”
Fuck. This was going to be one hell of a night.
“TALK about piling pressure on the boy. Leo, you’re just plain evil!”
Leo grinned at Miles. “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said innocently.
Miles snorted. “Could you have even made a bigger entrance? Walking Alex through those doors, naked, on your leash…. Most of us are quite happy to let our subs change in the locker room, y’know.” He was smiling, however, as he spoke. Leo glanced down to where Alex was kneeling, fully aware his sub could hear this conversation, but give the boy his due, Alex’s stance was perfect.
“Yeah, but we’re not Leo Hart, are we?” Trevor was passing by and stopped to converse with them. “Besides, I don’t think it was about Leo making an entrance. I think it was Leo showing his complete and utter faith in his submissive. Hell, we all knew it was Alex’s first time, and Christ, Leo, he does you proud.” Trevor gave Alex a quick glance and leaned closer to Leo, lowering his voice. “I only hope you’ve got one hell of a reward planned for him. That boy hasn’t lost his hard-on since he came through that door.”
Leo looked down at Alex, noting the erection that rose from his newly bared groin. It had been a lot of fun shaving Alex tonight, even though the boy had been somewhat ticklish. Maintaining an erection, however, had been Alex’s suggestion, based on something he’d read in one of his books, and Leo wasn’t about to knock him back. Trevor was right: Alex was making him so proud.
“I worried I’d pushed him too far, too fast,” he confessed in a low voice to Miles and Trevor. “I asked a lot of him, I know.”
“Yeah, but you have the right to ask that of him—you’re his Dom,” replied Miles, equally quietly.
Leo gave him a grateful smile. He looked down once more and was suddenly seized by the urge to kiss his boy. He reached down and stroked the top of Alex’s head, noting with pleasure how Alex pushed into his soft caress, clearly seeking his Dom’s touch. Leo bent down and took Alex’s mouth in a possessive kiss, thrusting his tongue into that eager mouth, lips parting for him instantly. Alex’s cock twitched. Maybe it was time for Alex’s reward.
He broke the kiss and whispered into Alex’s ear, “Stand up, boy.” Alex got to his feet gracefully. Leo always marveled how someone with legs as long as his could still manage to put so
much poise into his movements. He knew, however, from his earlier encounters with the boy, Alex was naturally awkward. His boy was working damned hard to move like that, and Leo appreciated his efforts. He caught the admiring, appreciative glances of the other Doms as they passed, and it made his heart swell with pride in his sub.
A rich chuckle caught his attention. After making sure Alex was standing correctly, feet together, hands by his sides, Leo turned his attention to Miles, who was regarding the pair of them, shaking his head and still chuckling. “What’s tickled you?” Leo asked, unable to refrain from grinning.
Miles broke into a huge smile, his dark eyes twinkling with good humor. “I’m just finding this so fucking ironic, that’s all.” Leo gave him a puzzled look, and Miles lowered his voice to a whisper, leaning close. “Leo Hart is in love with his sub.” He straightened, grinning, his eyes fixed on Leo, as if daring him to deny it.
Leo caught his breath, glancing across at Alex. The boy stood quietly, eyes lowered, and gave no sign he’d heard Miles’s whispered utterance.
Miles’s eyes widened. “He doesn’t know how you feel,” he said in a whisper. Leo shook his head, flashing Miles a warning glance. Miles gave a brisk nod, but his expression of surprise gave way to a smile that lit up his whole face. He leaned in close. “I’m so happy for you,” he confided. “You deserve some happiness, especially after what you went through when Gabe….” He broke off, his smile fading instantly.
Leo hastened to reassure his fellow Dom. “It’s okay, Miles, really it is.” Leo smiled. “I’ve done a lot of healing in these last few months.” He glanced fondly in Alex’s direction. And it was all because of his boy. “So if you’ll excuse me,” he said, speaking loudly so Alex would be able to pick up every word, “I have a private room booked for me and my sub.” He caught the flash of joy in Alex’s eyes. Ooo, his boy was happy about that! He cupped Alex’s face. “Ready, boy?”