Almost Lovers

by Cassidy Raindance

  "It would piss her off," said Victoria.

  "Yes..." not really understanding how that was a good thing.

  "Get her really mad and she'll talk. It might start with some screaming," said Victoria, shrugging, "But if you can deal with Lydia...I doubt Prussia will throw that level of crazy at you. You'll be fine, smooth things over,"

  I couldn’t argue with her logic so I just nodded, mind wandering. I knew she had called this meeting wanting to talk about Prussia but I had other things on my mind too. I had been trying to wait for the right time and it didn’t seem like it was every going to come. The words always stuck in my throat.

  “Anything else?” she asked.

  She must have sensed my hesitance to leave now that I didn’t seem to have anything else to say on Prussia. I decided to just clear the air and get it out there. The worst thing that could happen is…she could kill me. I tried to shake that thought out of my head and just spit out what I wanted to ask.

  "Victoria, are we going to talk about how we're human or are you just going to let that bombshell hang over us?" I asked.

  She made some random scratches on a piece of paper and then looked up at me, smiling. She must have been prepared for me to ask because she didn’t skip a beat.

  "What would you like to know?" asked Victoria, "Three questions. Go."

  I was caught off guard with that. Only three questions? I had hoped for a lengthy discussion. But at least I’m getting some answers as opposed to none. I tried to think of three questions and drew a blank. She wasn’t going to wait forever I realized as her smile started to fade and her eyes wandered back to the dusty documents as I tried to blurt out the first questions that came to mind.

  "Why didn't you say anything before and when were you going to tell us?" I asked first, "What are we?" I asked with a huff because I knew she would probably give a generic answer and my final question I struggled with asking. I wanted to ask a good one.

  "What makes you think Prussia is so special?" I blurted out, realizing I could have phrased it a little better.

  Victoria didn't look up from the documents she was going over. She made a few scratches on another document with her pen and then began speaking as she wrote.

  "Because all hell would've broken loose,” she said, looking at me with her smile again, “We are humans infected with a virus over generations that has been passed down or infected others as we've fed, and honestly I hadn't ever intended to tell anyone. I've kept this secret for more than eighty thousand years. I'm good at keeping secrets."

  She looked at me then, looking very much like someone's grandmother the way she peered over her reading glasses. I had no way to know if she actually needed those reading glasses. I wasn't about to waste a question on her spectacles.

  "You only answered two questions," I pointed out.

  "You asked four, I answered three. Two questions were very similar is all," she said, going back to her document, "In time, I hope to have answers enough myself to fill you in. I need more time,"

  “You can’t tell me anything else?” I asked, “Anything that might be important? To help me protect her?”

  I baited her with the one thing that mattered to her – Prussia’s safety.

  Victoria looked up from her work again, papers still in hand, and this time she nibbled at the corner of her lip. She did that when deciding if she could trust someone with information she thought important. It was her most telling sign and I had picked it up right away when I first came to court as captain of the Royal Guard.

  She set down the papers and took off her glasses. She looked at me then and I knew I had her complete attention. All of her focus was on me and whatever she had decided she wanted to share with me.

  "Do you know my friend Felecia?" asked Victoria.

  "No," I said, "Mother had mentioned her years ago but..." I trailed off, avoiding any memory of my mother. Her loss was still close to my heart.

  Victoria nodded understanding that I didn’t want to go on about my mother, her daughter. The loss must have left a wound for her as well.

  "Felecia and I have been friends longer than I've been on this planet," said Victoria.

  "I don't understand," I said, "She’s not from this planet?"

  "Not important," said Victoria, "The point is - she's an old friend. And someone has been killing off her bloodline."

  That sent one of my eyebrows up in interest.

  "Someone's killing off an entire line of ancient vampires?" I asked, more to hear the words out loud than to have her repeat herself.

  "Yes," said Victoria, "The last time I spoke to her had been about this girl. She had asked me to relocate her here soon after the girl was born."

  "Why go through so much trouble for a human?" I asked, puzzled.

  "I thought, as you thought of me, that she had just adopted a sort of pet," said Victoria, "And old friends do what old friends can for old friends. I obliged and kept her close but at a distance,"

  "Until now," I said, "You think she has to do with vampires being killed?"

  "I'm not sure," said Victoria, "A few months ago I got a letter from Felecia. It said Prussia had the answers. It was the last letter I received."

  "You think she was kidnapped?" I asked.

  "I think she was murdered," said Victoria, "But why, I’m unsure. And that's why I need Prussia safe. I need answers,"

  "What of the vampire that came to attack Prussia when I was..." I trailed off again. I didn't really want to remind the Queen about Lydia and a trained killer coming after Prussia.

  "We tortured him for weeks. He didn’t give up much," said the Queen, "He had come to kidnap Prussia. He must have thought that if we knew he had not intended to kill her that it would mean an end to his torture,"

  "And did it?" I asked.

  Victoria pursed her lips and folded her hands on the desk. She didn't have to say anything. Queen Victoria had never been known for mercy. Torture, on the other hand, in the time of the Chancellor at least - had been her legacy. Strictly followed laws and strictly administered punishments.

  "Where does this leave me with Prussia?" I asked, “Where are you going with the entire consultant thing? You can’t honestly think that she could consult in court and not realize that she’s surrounded by vampires. And you can’t expect a room full of closet slave owners to curtsy and bow to a human you parade as royalty…”

  Victoria pursed her lips again and I regretted the way I had said it. Apparently, she thought her word as Queen meant she could order anything and have it followed without question, without mutiny.

  “If we’re going to parade her around our court of, what did you call them? Closet slave owners? Then we are going to need more than my orders not to harm her. I am still looking into legalities but I hoped that consultant would at least keep her safe in the house,” said Victoria.

  “I want to know what kind of legal wizardry you’re going to do to keep the hamburger safe,” I said, laughing a little.

  “Prussia is a sweet girl,” said Victoria, looking at me harshly, “You should be nicer to her. You’re supposed to at least care about her wellbeing,”

  “I am very nice to her. She’s a very nice hamburger,” I said. I had a nagging thought in the back of my head – the thought that perhaps I was starting to grow fonder of her than I had intended.

  Victoria gave me a stern look and I smiled. She didn’t seem to like my teasing.

  “Whether you think of her as food or not,” said Victoria, “No biting and do not, for heaven’s sake, turn her under any circumstances.”

  “Hadn’t given it a single thought,” I said, surprised that Victoria would think I would want that kind of responsibility at all, “I mean about the turning, of course,”

  “Sebastian, this is serious,” said Victoria, “Until I know what we’re dealing with, we have to…preserve her the way she is,”

  I nodded. Clearly not getting any laughs out of my teasing and jokes this evening I quit trying.

&
nbsp; “I promise not to eat the nice cheeseburger,” I said, one last jab.

  Victoria gave me a disapproving and annoyed look. She waved her hand to tell me I could go and I did just that. I went to close the door behind me but stopped. The Queen waved another hand, signaling me to leave the door open but not bothering to look up at me from the texts she read and notated.

  “Expecting someone?” I asked.

  “Nobody,” murmured the Queen, “and yes,”

  I ran into nobody as I was passing through the end of the hall, nearly to the entry way and out the doors. It would figure that I would run into the exact nobody the Queen had mentioned. She walked with her usual saunter, her over pronounced and over practiced stride that had her hips and even her hair bounce gently with ever step. She had mesmerized me in my youth. Even now, her walk still held an element of hypnosis to them. But I restrained as the memory of her betrayals kept stacking up.

  She didn’t seem as surprised to see me. I tried to look unchanged and uncaring. But I had a weakness still. I felt it. Faint, but it was still there.

  "After centuries, you're leaving me for a human?" asked Lydia. She threw a pout my way. I knew immediately what she was doing. She wanted to make amends and put it all behind us. She always used that pout to get her way. She wanted us together.

  Or she was messing with me, trying to get me to say I would always choose her over a human. And most of the time it would have been true. But she didn't know what I knew. It was enough to protect Prussia over Lydia's vanity and pride. Besides, what was Lydia to me if I couldn't trust her with my life? She isn't even back in the court and tosses me under the bus in pursuit of power and a position.

  "You left me first," I said, "I was just up front about it,"

  “I would never leave you, definitely not for a human. How could you ever choose a human?” She asked, her eyes watery and sad. She took my hand and placed it on her cheek, “Over me?”

  “Can’t actually live on love as some would have us believe,” I said, drawing my hand away.

  “Are you saying she’s just food to you?” asked Lydia, her face lighting up.

  “No,” I said, realizing exactly how I was going to get back at Lydia but unsure if I could go through with it, “I think she’s very sweet, charming and…nice,” I left off the hamburger part.

  Her face twisted with the rage I knew always bubbled at the surface.

  “You can’t be serious,” said Lydia, her hands on her hips now and her eyes narrowed, “Victoria would never approve,”

  I had her upset. I had found the button to push. I didn’t know if it meant she loved me or if she just didn’t like sharing but she was angry. And it made me smile. I think seeing me smile at her anger made her even angrier.

  “The Queen…,” I tried to think of the best way to get maximum impact out of my words, “…picked her out for me,”

  “Didn’t the Queen ever tell you not to play with your food?” Lydia asked, “Just because she brought you lunch doesn’t mean you name it and take it to birthday parties!”

  I had gotten her mad but not nearly as angry as I knew she could get. If I wanted to really twist the knife I knew the one thing that I could say. It had been the thing that had angered her the most. It had always been the cause of so many of our fights. And I didn’t know if I could do it.

  “She’s so much more than lunch,” I whispered into Lydia’s angry, flush face.

  “You’re making it up,” said Lydia, “You’re just trying to make me jealous,”

  She tried to look hurt for a moment but as long as I kept my face straight I could see that fake emotion flickering and finally fail. Lydia had never been good at faking emotion when angry. Anger always overrode all of her other emotions. Always.

  “I think I might even love her,” I said, lying to her now just to get a rise.

  Her eyes went wide. I could tell that we had almost reached epic proportions of anger. If I pushed it a little bit more there would be no turning back. My revenge would be complete but I would be saying goodbye to her for possibly forever.

  “Take it back,” she said in a hushed voice, anger so great it made her whisper, “You could never love that doormat over me,”

  “I happen to agree with the Queen,” I said in a lulled whispered, only loud enough for her ears to hear, “Prussia would make a much more agreeable wife…than you ever could have,”

  I think if I wanted to I could have picked her up at the shoulders and moved her like a statue. That’s how rigid with anger she was. I laughed and that’s what did it. I saw her hand come hard and fast, her claws out and she gave me one solid slap across the face. The blood streaked down the scratch marks she left on my face and made it to my chin by the time the wounds healed.

  “I don’t want to see you,” said Lydia, “ever again. And I hope you know what you’re doing. I’m a force…,” she sucked in a staggered breath that almost seemed like crying, “as an enemy.”

  She stormed off down to where the Queen still worked into the night. I thought I could hear the echoes of tears hit the plush carpet and the sound of footsteps turn into running. At least she was in a place that loved to roll around in the misery and drama of others. The court would welcome her with open arms. The only thing missing was a door being slammed. Perhaps Charlie had followed her through the house.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN - Prussia

  I hadn't said anything to Sebastian in days. I had avoided him at all costs, imagining different ways to tell him off. I settled for simply ignoring him. I had already agreed to the job Victoria had offered so I couldn't bail. And I needed the money now that I had no job. But that didn't mean that I needed to talk to or see Sebastian.

  Most of the time, when I saw him, I simply glared at him and kept walking. Today was no different. I saw him in passing in the halls of the castle, as I came to call Victoria’s beautiful family home, most days but I kept my lips pressed together and pretended never to see him.

  The first week of this I had been very hostile. I couldn't have talked to him if I had wanted to. The second week I had calmed down but I still wasn't ready to confront him. And while I still felt furious now on the third week of ignoring him and not talking to him, I did sympathize.

  I had trusted him. I had thought that he had been genuinely interested in me. And it turned out he had been lying since day one. Just like me. The realization had been heavy when it hit. He had been doing the exact same thing I had been doing - maybe.

  I didn't really know because I didn't give him a chance to explain. Heck, I didn't even tell him why I was mad at him. I just stopped talking and taking his calls altogether. At least he had been calm and given me a chance to explain. After a few weeks of reflection, I came to realize that I wasn't as perfect and blameless as I made myself out to be.

  But it didn't stop me from being angry at him. The hurt still felt real and the wound fresh. And of all people, to find that he had dated Lydia...it had cut even deeper. I imagine he must have realized it would have been painful knowledge. I wanted to think he had kept it from me for that reason and not some other motivating factor.

  I had to hope. I wiggled the house key in the front door of Victoria’s home and found Charlie, the doorman, opening it from the other side. He smiled at me and gave a gracious bow.

  "Lady Prussia," he said.

  "Oh you don't have to do that," I said, "There is no one to see. I feel so silly with all this formality,"