Dare To Run (The Sons of Steel Row #1)

by Jen McLaughlin

  Scotty was mine to take care of, no one else’s.

  I made quick work of my pants and boxers before sliding beneath the sheet. Heidi wasn’t the only one who liked to sleep naked, and right now, I needed my bed.

  Not my couch.

  The bedroom door opened, and Heidi came in. Her pale cheeks had a bit more color, but there were still shadows in those blue eyes of hers. “Hey.”

  “Hey.” I forced a smile and patted the spot next to me on the bed. I’d had more than a few drinks during and after the stitch-up, so I might have been sliding down the slope to smashed. Hypothetically. “Come here, darlin’.”

  She bit down on her lip as she crossed the room. Crawling onto the bed from the opposite side, she settled in next to my hip. “Does it hurt a lot?”

  Fuck, yeah. “Nope.”

  “Good.” She touched the white gauze Chris had wrapped around it. “Do you have any of the good stuff to numb the pain?”

  I chuckled. “I sell guns, not drugs.”

  “Shit.”

  “It’s fine. I’m fine.” It was true. I didn’t need any damn pills dulling my brain. Between the fact that I’d been shot in my dominant arm and had already had plenty of booze, I didn’t need anything else messing me up. Chris was watching my perimeter and would give me a heads-up if it looked like a threat was approaching. Or he’d just handle it himself. I’d told him to do whatever the fuck he wanted, so long as he stayed away from Scotty.

  I focused back on the woman in front of me. “You’re pretty, you know.”

  She’d been staring at my arm with a green tinge to her skin, but my words jerked her attention north. Yeah, my arm had just been shot, but I wouldn’t want to be anyplace else right now. “Uh, thanks?”

  “No, like, seriously. You’re really pretty. Like an angel come to earth.” Reaching out, I tugged on a piece of her light blond hair. It was as silky soft as always. “My own personal angel, trying to bring me to the good side . . .”

  She blinked. “I’m no angel, I assure you.”

  “I don’t agree.” I yanked her down till she sprawled across my chest. She landed with an oof, taking care to avoid my bad arm. “Not at all, darlin’. Just look at you.”

  Her brow furrowed. “Oh my God, are you drunk?”

  “No,” I whispered back, as dramatically as her. “Certainly not.”

  But I ruined it by laughing.

  Instead of looking annoyed, her lips twitched, and she laughed, too. “You’re way too cute when you’re drunk.”

  I ran my thumb over her mouth, watching as it swiped over that full lower lip of hers that had driven me insane countless times. Her breathing quickened. Despite the way she’d been acting earlier, during our fight, she wanted me now. That much was clearly evident. “Cute enough to get away with this?”

  Before she could reject me, I closed my mouth over hers, kissing her. Her lips parted on a sigh, and I took full advantage of that opening. My tongue swept inside her mouth, seeking and finding hers instantly. She tasted as good as I remembered.

  Hell, probably even better.

  And she still smelled like peaches.

  I’d expected her to tense. To pull away and tell me to keep my hands to myself. She should have. So when she moaned and climbed on top of me, I reveled in it.

  But the stupid, noble part of me wouldn’t shut up. Breaking off the kiss, I groaned and gripped her thigh, digging my fingers into the soft flesh. “You don’t have to do this. I know I’m not your type. Don’t feel you have to take pity on the wounded drunk.”

  What was it about this girl that made me want to be something I wasn’t? Shit, I’d had more moments of regret over the last three days than I’d had in the last fifteen years combined. I was turning into such a pussy.

  “About that?” She played with a piece of my hair. “I don’t know what the hell’s been running through your brain all day, but if you’ve thought about last night half as much as I have, it would’ve proved to you that you’re totally my type.”

  Gritting my teeth, I arched my hips up into her. Her heat pressed against me, and it took all my control not to roll her underneath me and take her, hard and fast, right now. The only thing that stopped me was the fact that the excruciating pain I was sure to feel would kill my hard-on.

  The reminder about my injury, and how I’d gotten it, made me make one last-ditch effort to get Heidi to see reason. “I’m no good for you, sweetheart. You deserve Prince Charming, not the villain. Whoever the fuck the villain was in that stupid story.”

  “You’re not a villain. Not to me.” She rested a hand over my heart. “You’re a Prince Charming who’s suffered in defense of his kingdom. You did what needed to be done, no matter how dark it might have gotten. And you won. That doesn’t make you a villain. It makes you a survivor. It makes you you.”

  Her open acceptance filled the cracks in my soul. I’d needed to hear that. My arm gripped her tighter and she gave me a watery smile. Shaking my head, I swallowed back the words I’d never let myself say. I was drunk, and now was not the time to spill my guts. Yeah, I had some regrets right now, and that was a new feeling. Fucking up Scotty was one of them. But there was one thing I wouldn’t regret. Not in a million years. And that was her. “I want to take you again. I want to make you mine.”

  She nodded. “Yes. I am yours, Lucas. All yours.”

  “God help us both.”

  I tugged her down and kissed her again, closing my eyes and letting go of all the reasons I shouldn’t be touching her. Claiming her. I was in an impossible situation with no way out. We were doomed. Hopeless. Screwed. Even so, I couldn’t have stopped if someone held a gun to my head.

  She was worth dying for.

  Skimming my hand down her leg, I slipped my fingers up the inside of her thigh, creeping closer to what I wanted. But she had too many clothes on, and I didn’t have enough hands available to take them off properly. “Take your clothes off for me, sweetheart.”

  “Yes, sir,” she teased, straightening and tugging her shirt over her head inch by tantalizing inch. “Are you naked under that sheet?”

  I smirked. “Take one guess.”

  “Good.” Tossing her shirt on the floor, she reached behind her back and undid her bra. After shooting me a naughty grin, she let it slide off her arms and hit me in the face. “That’s the way I like you. Naked and helpless in my bed.”

  My bed. That’s what she’d said. The fact that she considered my bed to be hers, with everything that had happened between us over the last four days, filled me with that unfamiliar warmth all over again. And it felt good. I dragged her bra off my face and tossed it over the edge of the bed, smiling way too big considering all she’d done was call my bed hers. “Tease.”

  “You know it.” Shimmying off me, she stood and pulled her pants down. Every inch of skin she bared stoked the fire in my blood higher and higher. “You love it.”

  The second her pants hit the floor, I yanked her onto my lap with my good hand. Our lips fused and our tongues entwined, and everything felt right. Being in her arms felt like coming home. A home I hadn’t had in a long damn time. Growling low in my throat, I deepened the kiss.

  Her nails dragged down my chest, circled around my piercing, and then slid under the sheet. When she closed her soft, warm hand over my cock, I knew I needed her. Now. I didn’t usually rush through sex. The act was a display of discipline and skill. It wasn’t a time to get lost in the moment and forget yourself. But with Heidi, I wanted to.

  I wanted to lose myself so fucking bad.

  Tugging the sheet down, I hauled her onto me so she straddled my hips. Breaking off the kiss, I demanded, “Condom. Now.”

  For once, she didn’t argue with me. She just reached out, opened the drawer I’d used last night, and took one out. Ripping it open, she scooted down my legs and slid it on, licking her lips as she did so. She was killing me. After she rolled the condom on, I buried my hand in her hair, fisted it, and slowly pulled her down.
r />   She followed my guidance until her lips were an inch from mine. Breathing heavily, she straddled me and locked her stare with mine. When she positioned my cock at the entry of her pussy, I tsked. “Not yet, darlin’.”

  Freezing, she bit down on her lower lip. This close up, I could see the darker specks of blue hidden near her pupils. I’d never noticed them before, but now I knew I’d always see them. She licked her lips, her tongue brushing against my mouth because we were that close together. “Lucas . . .”

  “I know, darlin’. I know.”

  Yanking her closer, I kissed her, and at the same moment, I lifted my hips and thrust inside her. She whimpered into my mouth, her whole body tightening around mine, and tugged on my nipple ring. For once, I didn’t hold myself back. My attention wasn’t split between the woman beneath me and the environment around me.

  I just let my instincts guide me, and I let Heidi take me away.

  She rode me, hard and fast, and our lips never parted. Her hands framed my face, and she moaned, long and deep. I knew I was close to the edge. So close that all it would take was another one of those moans from her, and I’d be a goner. So I reached between our bodies and pressed my thumb against her clit, repositioning myself beneath her so her body rubbed against mine as she fucked me.

  Her thrusts became more frantic and needy, and each one made her walls close on me even more. Each restless cry, and held breath, made my body tighten even more. Breaking off the kiss, I growled and buried my face in her shoulder, lifting my hips off the bed and thrusting into her even deeper. “Come for me, sweetheart.”

  “Oh my God, Lucas.” She clung to my shoulder for dear life. “Again.”

  I lifted my hips again, still pressing my thumb against her. She threw her head back, and that hair I was obsessed with trailed down her back to my thighs. Her big, perky tits bounced, and she stared down at me with sparkling blue eyes that made my heart speed up for no reason at all. I knew, again, that this woman was special. That I’d never find another woman who made me feel this way.

  Not like her.

  Her mouth fell open, and she came, her pussy clamping down on my cock. I was already primed and ready to explode, so all it took was one more thrust into her wet heat, and I joined her in heaven. Because if ever a heaven existed? This was it.

  Knowing she was still soaring high, I pressed my thumb against her clit again, moving it in tiny, gentle circles. She tensed and started riding me again. It was the most exquisite torture I’d ever inflicted upon myself, but I’d be damned if I’d let her leave my bed with only one orgasm. Even if it killed me . . . which it just might.

  Biting down on her lip, she let out a shattered breath and rolled her hips in a figure eight, her cheeks flushed red and her entire body a tempting portrait I never wanted to stop admiring. And probably never would, years after she walked away from me. Her muscles tightened, and letting out a groan, she came again.

  Grinning, I slowly stopped massaging her, letting her come down slowly. She fell on top of my chest, her breathing hard. After a while, she lifted her face and stared down at me. Her cheeks were still flushed, and her lips were soft and swollen from my kisses. “Holy shit. That was . . . wow.”

  She started to climb off me, but I wrapped my good arm around her, hauling her even closer. Her bare skin on mine felt amazing. I didn’t want to read too much into it, or have her think this meant something more than it could, but I definitely didn’t want to let go of her, either. So I didn’t. The room spun, and I closed my eyes. The damn ceiling fan wouldn’t stop moving even though I was pretty sure I hadn’t turned it on.

  She tried to roll away again, so I held her even tighter. “Where do you think you’re going?”

  “Nowhere.” She rested a hand on my heart. Or, better yet, where my heart would be if I still had one. I wasn’t so certain I did, most of the time. “Nowhere at all.”

  Yawning, I nodded. “Damn right, you aren’t.”

  Exhaustion tried to claim me, but I fought it. In a minute, I’d get up and go lie down on the couch. In a minute, I’d separate myself from the woman who had already claimed too much of me for comfort. In a minute . . .

  CHAPTER 20

  HEIDI

  Three hours later, I sat on the couch, accounting ledger in my lap and my hair pulled back in a loose ponytail. I’d called out of work for the next two nights and asked my manager to cover my shift. I hadn’t wanted to leave Lucas alone. Earlier, Lucas had fallen asleep, and I hadn’t wanted to spoil the moment by slipping out of his arms and waking him. I’d lain there, enjoying the feel of his arms around me as his breathing evened . . . and I’d accidentally drifted off as well. When I’d woken up in his arms, I’d been torn between wanting to smile and giving in to sheer panic.

  If he knew that he’d slept beside me, he’d push me away even more than he already had. Something about that intimacy scared the crap out of him, and I had to respect that. I might have stupidly fallen in love with him, despite his telling me not to, but that love didn’t make me stupid. He’d made it very clear that he didn’t want to sleep with me, just like he’d made it perfectly clear that he would never care about me.

  So I’d climbed out of bed, gotten dressed, and decided to act as if it had never happened. To him, it probably hadn’t, since he’d been out cold.

  It was my dirty little secret.

  Footsteps sounded outside the door, followed by four knocks in a row. “Hello? Heidi? It’s me, Chris. Let me in. Lucas didn’t give me a new key yet.”

  I set the ledgers aside, smoothed my shirt over my stomach, and made my way to the door. When I got there, I cracked it open and peeked through, making sure he was alone. He was. “Hey. What’s up?”

  “I got you guys pizza.” He held the white box higher. “Pepperoni, Lucas’s favorite. I figured he needed it after today.”

  I opened the door and crossed my arms in front of me. It felt weird letting him in, even though he was clearly an ally. I hadn’t forgotten how we’d met. “Thanks.”

  “I got beer, too.” He walked past me, leaving the faint scent of Old Spice aftershave in his wake. After setting the pizza and a six-pack of Sam Adams on the table, he turned to me. Something of my feelings must have shown on my face, because he rubbed his jaw and said, “You don’t like me much, do you?”

  I lifted a shoulder and leaned on the closed door, hand on the knob. “Does it really matter if I do or don’t?”

  He walked over to me, stopping a few feet short. Close enough for eye contact, but not close enough to make me feel the urge to defend myself . . . again. This time, if he made a move, I’d be ready. And he’d get a knee to the nuts. “Look, I’m sorry I tackled you to the floor.”

  I choked on a laugh. “Uh, thanks?”

  “I’m serious.” He shoved a hand through his brown hair and stared at me. This close, I saw he had little flecks of dark green in his eyes. I’d never seen anything like it. “I know I came across like a dick, but I was just looking out for my buddy. He doesn’t have a lot of people in his corner, but he has me. He’s always had me and always will.”

  Sagging against the door, I bit down on my tongue. What he said, and how he said it, struck home with me. I didn’t really know what that felt like. Lucas was lucky to have someone who cared about him that much. “I know why you did what you did. It’s fine.”

  He rested a hand on my shoulder. “Are you sure, doll?”

  “Yes, of course.”

  The door opened and Lucas came out, yawning. He had on a loose pair of gray sweats and no shirt. “Heidi? Where are—?” He saw me and Chris standing together. “Oh. There you are.”

  “Hey.” Chris dropped his hand instantly. “You’re up.”

  “Yeah.” Lucas fisted his hands and locked those bright green eyes on me. “Everything okay out here, darlin’?”

  “Y-yes, of course.” I smiled. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

  “He had his hand on you,” Lucas pointed out. “For starters.”

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nbsp; Chris sighed. “Don’t go getting jealous, now. I wasn’t doing anything like that. We were just—”

  “I know.” Lucas frowned at both of us. “I didn’t think she was. I just wanted to make sure you weren’t about to tackle her to the floor again.”

  We all fell silent.

  Chris cleared his throat. “I brought up beer and pizza, so you have good timing. Sorry if my knock woke you up, but I don’t have a key anymore.”

  “Thanks, man.” Lucas walked to the window and peeked out, his shoulders hard and straight. “Your key is by the door.”

  Chris walked over and grabbed the gold key, holding it up and nodding once. “Got it.”

  Lucas still didn’t turn around. “Everything quiet out there?”

  “So far.”

  “Good. Thanks for keeping watch while I slept the whiskey off.”

  Chris nodded once. “Anytime, man. You know that.”

  “I do.” He turned back to us. “Thanks, again, for coming.”

  I recognized a dismissal when I saw one.

  So, apparently, did Chris.

  He headed for the door, zipping his brown leather jacket up. “Hey, by the way, Tate wants you to supervise the drop at the docks tomorrow at eleven, and then you need to be at the meeting afterward. It wasn’t a request. He said be there.”

  I frowned. “He can’t. He’s still recovering.”

  “He doesn’t have a choice,” Chris said.

  “I can talk for myself,” Lucas interjected, his voice rock hard. “I’ll be there.”

  I gritted my teeth, watching the men say their good-byes. As soon as the door shut behind Chris and we were alone, I let loose on him. “You were literally just shot, and you’re going to go back out there? Are you insane? What if they attack you again? You’re weak. You can’t fight back.”

  “The hell I can’t. Besides, I don’t have a choice,” he said, locking the door. “I already canceled on Tate once. To do it twice wouldn’t be wise.”