by Claire Adams
I took a deep breath of the cold air and turned the corner, deciding to do another loop before heading back to the house. I needed to get my thoughts together before I approached Quinn; she was too important for me to talk to her haphazardly. As I ran through the neighborhood streets, I closed my eyes, feeling the wind hitting my face and waking up all of my senses. I needed to do this more often; running always allowed me to think things through without rushing to a decision, and causing even more problems than before. I thought about Quinn, what she meant to me, what she meant to Jake, and where I wanted to see our relationship go. I wanted her to know that I cared deeply for her, but that I wasn’t ready for another family.
When I was content with my voice and knew exactly how to talk to her to try to lessen the hurt feelings as much as possible, I headed back toward the house. As I turned the corner and headed up the street, I glanced up at my driveway, slowing my pace as I approached. There was an unfamiliar black sedan sitting in the driveway. I wasn’t expecting anyone and assumed that Quinn wasn’t either. I picked the pace back up, worried that something had happened to Jake or someone else. As I reached the edge of the pavement, the car door opened and a woman maneuvered her way to her feet. She was middle-aged, with dark hair pulled back at the collar, her white shirt pressed and crisp beneath her perfectly hemmed and pressed suit jacket and skirt. She was wearing black stockings and modest, but fashionable heels. She looked like a female FBI agent, and I slowed my pace, coming to a stop in front of her.
“Hello,” I said with confusion. “How can I help you?”
“Good morning,” she said, pulling her glasses away revealing dark brown eyes. “Are you Mr. Luke Thompson?”
“Yes,” I said, with a half-smile as I reached out and shook the woman’s hand.
“Excellent,” she said, shaking my hand strongly and turning to the car to grab her briefcase.
From the looks of it, I already had a pretty good idea who she was, but I wanted to make sure before I just walked her straight into the house. I couldn’t be too careful since I knew that Sarah was vying to get me caught in the lie we had perpetrated in court. I didn’t put it past her at all to hire a private investigator to handle the situation.
“I’m sorry,” I said, with a kind smile. “And you are?”
“Oh,” she said, shaking her head. “I’m sorry, where are my manners? I am Sylvia Brown, the court-appointed official, here to do a surprise inspection of your household.”
“Nice to meet you,” I said, clearing my throat. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were coming, I would have made sure I wasn’t all sweaty from a run.”
“Not a problem,” she said, closing her car door. “That is why these are a surprise. We want to see you and your family in more natural surroundings. We don’t want you just cooking up a fake family, after all.”
She laughed loudly, and I joined in, not knowing if she was joking or taking a stab because of what Sarah had said about everything. She looked at me with teary eyes and her laughter, short and abrupt, ended quickly, leaving me feeling slightly uncomfortable. I lifted my eyebrows and took a deep breath turning toward the yard.
“Well, what would you like to see first?”
“Since we are outside, you can show me around here first,” she said, nodding her head.
“All right,” I replied. “I bought this house shortly after the divorce was final. It’s nothing massive or luxurious, but it’s perfect for the three of us. Come on; I’ll show you the fenced yard in the back.”
I walked Ms. Brown around to the back and unlatched the gate, happy that I got around to fixing that before she showed up. We walked into the back, and I stood to the side as she wandered around the freshly cut lawn, making note of different things, including where the lawn equipment was stored, if the railings on the porch were stable, and how many square feet there actually was.
“Does Jake play out here a lot?”
“Well, I just got him for the first time last weekend, so he hasn’t had a lot of time here,” I said with a smile. “But I’m hoping come summer I can get him a kiddie pool maybe, and some soccer balls to kick around. This was why I wanted this house to begin with: the backyard for Jake.”
“I see,” she said, making a note. “All right, let’s go on inside and meet the future Mrs. Thompson.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
Quinn
When I woke up, Luke wasn’t in the bed any longer, so I pulled on some yoga pants, a t-shirt, and a long open sweater. I made my way out to the kitchen and started the coffee, looking at the window and watching as Luke passed by, looping around for a morning jog. I was glad he was doing something he liked to do, and it was healthy for him too. I immediately started making breakfast, humming to myself as I prepared the bacon and eggs. As I pulled the toast from the toaster, I heard the front door open and close.
“Breakfast is almost ready,” I hollered out to Luke.
I pulled the toast to the plate and slathered it with butter before cutting it diagonally across and putting it on the plate. I smiled as I worked, knowing Luke would appreciate the effort I put in to make sure he had a good breakfast before heading off to work. I pulled down two mugs and poured us each a cup of coffee, fixing mine just the way I liked it and leaving his black, which is what he preferred. As I stood there leaning against the counter and sipping my brew, I saw movement out of the corner of my eye.
“How was your run?” I looked over and stopped, pulling my sweater closed at the sight of a strange woman walking beside him.
“Quinn, this is Ms. Brown; she is the court-appointed official for our case and will be doing a quick surprise inspection of us,” Luke said, smiling nervously. “Ms. Brown, this is my fiancée, Quinn Mallorie.”
“Nice to meet you,” she said, stepping forward and shaking my hand firmly.
“Nice to meet you, too,” I said, clutching my sweater closed. “I’m sorry, if I’d known you were coming, I’d have put on some better clothes.”
“No need to apologize; that is why we call it a surprise inspection,” she smiled. “Like I told your fiancé, we like people to be thrown off guard a bit, not standing and waiting for us like the Cleavers. This is actually a very nice scene to walk into; believe me, I’ve had my share of unexpected surprises just showing up at people’s houses.”
“Oh,” I said, dismally, scrunching my nose. “Well, I’m glad to report you won’t find anything much more interesting than me in my pajamas. That’s about as shocking as we get.”
“That, my dear, is a good thing,” she said, winking at me and walking past into the kitchen.
I glanced over at Luke, who walked up to the breakfast bar and took a seat, winking at me. I could feel my cheeks begin to blush, and I turned back to the official, watching her look around and take notes on her clipboard. I walked over and pulled a mug from the cabinet and held it up.
“Can I offer you some coffee?”
“Oh, no thank you,” she said, with a smile.
I smiled and put the mug back in the cabinet and picked up Luke’s breakfast. I walked around the counter and set the plate down in front of him and slid his coffee across to his spot. He smiled at me and picked up his fork as I leaned over and kissed him on top of the head, trying to ignore the fact that we were being watched. It was a very strange feeling. As I moved to walk away, Luke grabbed my wrist and pulled me back over to him, reaching his head up and giving me a proper kiss. My heart fluttered at the feeling of his lips on mine, and I smiled as he pulled back, looking deep into my eyes. I didn’t know whether that was real or for show, but I liked it.
While Luke sat at the table eating his eggs, I stood beside him sipping my coffee and trying not to stare at Ms. Brown. She was looking around the kitchen and taking notes as she went, her face completely straight with no emotion. When she was done, she walked over to the counter and flipped the sheet on the clipboard.
“Just a few questions here,” she said, with a smile. “How often is Jake here?�
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“Well, we just started, so I brought him over last weekend for a few days to get him used to the place, but we haven’t been to mediation yet to make a set schedule,” Luke said.
“And how did he do?”
“He did wonderfully,” I responded. “He acted like he’d lived here his whole life. He didn’t have any problem falling asleep, waking up, or making his way around the house. He actually seemed happier than I had seen him in a long time; it was really nice.”
“That’s right,” she said, skimming her notes. “You used to be the boy’s sitter.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I said, with blushed cheeks.
When she was done asking questions, the official requested a tour of the house. We quickly obliged, and I let Luke lead her through the different areas of the house, explaining whatever she had questions on. Since Jake wasn’t that young, she didn’t require child safety devices on anything and seemed very impressed by the house. I knew everything was going perfectly. Luke was an adoring fiancé and father, and I was a doting homemaker, cooking in the kitchen when she arrived. I couldn’t have planned it any better myself; we looked relaxed, natural, in love, and completely in tune with Jake and his needs. I was really proud of what we had accomplished, and though I didn’t know whether it was all an act on Luke’s part or not, I knew that I felt right at home playing the wife and stay-at-home mom. When the tour was over, we walked back to the kitchen and stood, waiting for her comments.
“Well,” she said, taking in a deep breath. “I am very impressed by the two of you and your home. You seem to be a really loving couple that has provided Jake with everything here that he needs to be successful. It is actually a breath of fresh air, knowing that there are people out there really doing what is needed to give their children, or future step-children, all the tools they need to grow and be healthy, happy adults.”
“Thank you,” Luke said. “Jake is our life, and we are waiting patiently for him to start coming more often so we can really provide him with the things we see he is lacking.”
“Good,” she said. “That is what makes a successful co-parent, which is what is important for Jake right now. As far as the custody agreement, we’ll have one more surprise visit, but I think that if it goes as well as this one, I won’t need to continue. I will have no problem going to the judge and requesting that they go ahead and make the shared custody permanent.”
“Oh, thank you, Ms. Brown,” I said, stepping forward and shaking her hand. “That really is amazing news. Jake will be so excited when everything is over, and we can get Jake on a regular schedule so can finally know that no one will keep him from spending time with his dad.”
“And you,” Ms. Brown replied. “From what I’m seeing, that little boy is very important to you.”
“And he loves her very much,” Luke said, with a smile.
“I love to hear that,” she said, writing something on her clipboard. “Okay, well we are all done here for the day, and I will be back, probably sometime later this week so that I can speak to Jake and see him interacting with the two of you.”
“We can’t wait,” I said, walking with Ms. Brown toward the door. “Drive safely.”
“I will,” she said. “It was lovely meeting you.”
“You too,” I replied, watching her walk down the steps and out to her car.
I closed the front door and took in a deep breath of air, leaning back against the door. I smiled big, feeling absolutely elated on the inside. Everything had gone even better than I expected, and it looked like Luke was going to get his wish to have his son by his side. I walked into the kitchen and over to the counter, leaning back and smiling big.
“Could you have imagined that going any better? I mean, she was so impressed with us, the house, and how we are together,” I said, smiling. “I am so excited that things turned out like that.”
“Yeah,” Luke said, taking a deep breath. “It went great.”
“It went better than great,” I laughed, walking forward to give him a hug.
Before I could get there though, he scrambled slightly, stepping away from the breakfast bar and to the side. I stopped in my tracks and looked at him with confusion, not sure if he did that on purpose, or just didn’t realize what I was doing. I took another step forward and stopped again, watching as he turned and moved away. Obviously, he was purposely avoiding any contact with me, which was a stark contrast to the last twelve hours.
“I, uh, I have to get in the shower and get to work,” he mumbled, walking quickly toward the bedroom.
At first, I wanted to chase after him and call him out for whatever it was that he was pulling. He was obviously avoiding me, and I didn’t understand why. Everything was perfect the night before and had continued into that morning. I had made him breakfast, he had kissed me deeply, and we had knocked the socks off the court official. What had I done that had made him so jumpy that he was literally running away from me? I replayed every moment from the time we fell asleep the night before to this moment, and couldn’t figure out what had happened. I stood there in front of the coffee maker, staring down at the tile, completely confused. I could hear him in the bathroom getting ready, so I poured the remainder of the coffee into his mug and closed the lid.
When he came out of the bathroom, I put on a happy face, not wanting him to notice that his odd behavior had affected me at all. I thought maybe he was just processing what had happened and needed a few minutes alone to do so. However, as he rounded the corner, he didn’t even look up at me. He grabbed his bag, threw it over his shoulder, and walked straight to the door, pausing for just a moment as his hand turned the doorknob. I stood there shocked, holding his to-go mug in my hand and shuddering at the sound of the slamming door behind him. Immediately a trickle of fear ran through my stomach, and I pulled out the chair and sat down. He hadn’t even stopped to get his coffee or say goodbye.
I sat there in the chair for several minutes, trying to get a hold of the fear and anxiety that was steadily growing inside of me. The rest of the day I spent cleaning up, preparing for Jake’s arrival in a couple of days, and trying to keep my mind off of what happened. I still had hope that when he came home, he would be in a better mood, and maybe enlighten me on what I had done to make him treat me that way.
However, that night, he was borderline cold to me, not speaking at dinner, and retiring to the den without a word. I was beyond myself and didn’t know what to do. With this news of the impending approval of his child custody case, I was now more than fearful of what was yet to come.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Luke
I groaned as the alarm clock blared on the side table next to the pull-out. I slammed my hand down on the snooze button and laid there, not wanting to move. Two nights sleeping in the den had gotten me more than a little grumpy, and I hurt in places that I didn’t even realize could hurt. I pulled myself to a sitting position and ran my hands over my face, trying to straighten my back and shoulders without too much terrible pain. I was exhausted, stressed out, and not feeling like getting out of bed that morning. It was a Thursday, which meant I could pick up Jake at the end of the day, something that should have brightened my spirits.
Every single night it went the same way: I would go to the den, lie there until finally, I fell asleep, trying not to roll onto one of the hard springs almost protruding from the mattress, and then after about two hours, I would wake up. That same routine happened over and over throughout the night until it was finally time to pull myself out of bed. However, I realized that every time I fell asleep, I would have dreams about my soft mattress and that beautiful woman—Quinn of course—sleeping cozily beside me. Then, like clockwork, I would reach out for her and find nothing but a worn-down pull-out and a few ruffled blankets.
The only way I was able to get through it without going crazy or giving in was to think about why I was doing all of this in the first place. I focused my mind on Jake, thinking about my life without him in it and vice versa.
Everything I was doing was to make sure that I got permanent joint custody of Jake so I could help give him the tools he needs to be a strong and generous man when he grew up. I wanted to show him all the love he was not getting. I wanted to kiss him, hug him, and make memories with him. I did not go into this to become shackled in another marriage. I needed to keep my head on straight and remember my goals and wants for the future, and not give in to the emotions I was feeling at the moment.
I wasn’t sure how to handle the situation with Quinn, especially since I could tell after the last time we had sex that she had more than strong feelings for me. It wasn’t that I didn’t have feelings for her, but I couldn’t indulge those feelings and lead her to believe that I was ready for a brand-new family. Instead, I kept my distance from her, leaving for work without all the friendly banter, coming home, speaking directly and professionally during dinner, and retiring to the den long before bedtime. I hoped that she would start to understand that our feelings didn’t matter, and this was just the way it had to be.
The truth was, though, no matter how strong I was in my beliefs and visions of the future, the last few days had seemed almost torturous. I wanted to reach out and touch Quinn, to take her in my arms and apologize for hurting her. I wanted to crawl into my bed and wrap my arms around her at night, and not just because I was sleeping on the mattress from hell. When I had spent the night with her in my bed, I had never felt more comfortable or more content in my life. Everything seemed so absolutely perfect when she was with me, being herself and giving everything that she hid away during the prior days. I had never been this frustrated before, and not just in a sexual way. I didn’t know how to handle the emotions and thoughts I was experiencing where Quinn was concerned.