Nebula Nights: Love Among The Stars

by Melisse Aires

  “Yes, I never expected him to marry ever. He’s so cold and detached. Who would want him? I certainly didn’t.”

  “Oh no. You mean he…”

  “Yes, Sanaa-chan. He was in love with me forever. I can’t tell you how many times I refused him, and he kept trying and trying. Even after marrying Koichi and having two children. The man just does not give up.”

  This conversation is not boding well for my future. If Matsuda is this persistent, he will not rest until I’m dead or in the hands of someone who wants me dead. I’ve already pissed him off by being alive.

  “He revealed last night he trained Jiro in sword fighting.” I’ve hit a wall with eating, anxiety making my stomach shrink to the size of a grain of rice.

  “Sanaa, Jiro is very talented, and I’m not just saying that because I’m his mother.” She smiles at me. “He advanced so fast. Outgrew everything Koichi could teach him. Tadao is a master at fighting — read every book, trained with every master — and when that wasn’t enough, he figured it out for himself. Tadao offered to train Jiro, and, at first, they were a good match.”

  She sets down her chopsticks and dabs at her mouth with a napkin. “Jiro is so kind and good — good to the core. He can be stern and commanding, much like Mark.” I nod. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. “But he has a soft heart, very loving. Nothing at all like Tadao. They clashed often.”

  “What happened? Something must have happened.”

  “Eight years ago was the last time Tadao tried to proposition me. When I told him ‘no’ for the billionth time, he lashed out and hit me. I was never so angry in my entire life. I’m good at defending myself — most of the women in this family are — but he was lightning fast. Jiro confronted him, and they fought. I think it was the first time Jiro had ever drawn his sword against another person, but Jiro surprised him. It’s a good thing for Tadao, bad for us, his leg healed after that. Jiro was aiming for the femoral artery.”

  The blood in my head is slowly moving south. “Jiro actually tried to kill him?”

  “Yes, Sanaa-chan,” she says with surprise. “Of course. Tadao was close to the family, but he was, still is, suspected in the murders of several people. Jiro would have been doing everyone a favor.”

  “But wait… wait… Jiro was only fourteen.” Fourteen years old and already such a good fighter he could have killed Matsuda. If I couldn’t close my eyes and imagine his smiling face, remember his warm hands on my body, or his playful laugh, I would be sick with fear. It says something about me too that I love him even more now.

  The blood must be back in my head because the blush returning. Mariko is watching me with a slow smile forming.

  “Sanaa-chan, you must get better at hiding your feelings if you’re going to do this job. Your face went straight from fear to love in the span of five seconds.” She smiles and shakes her head a few times. “Wow, Jiro’s last girlfriend wasn’t even half the woman you are, and I realize now how stupid Koichi and I were to try to set him up with other girls before her. I’m glad they all didn’t work out.”

  My blush response is threatening to turn my face to ash, but I do my best to think cool, calming thoughts and keep it away. “Me, too.”

  I pick up my chopsticks again, my appetite returning, and remember something I had been meaning to ask Mariko about.

  “Now Mariko, you’re going to teach me your secret to Rock Paper Scissors. I must know and will not leave until you do.”

  Chapter

  Thirty-One

  “You’re not scared of me, Sanaa?” Jiro asks in disbelief. “I spent the last hour and a half sweating and wondering what you were thinking.”

  “Lay down on the bed and be silent for a bit Jiro.”

  He does as I instruct, and I lay down on top of him, turning my ear to his chest and listening to his heartbeat. This is the heart of a sweet, compassionate, intense, powerful person, and I’m not frightened by him. I love him. Slipping my hands over his on the bed, I press him down harder until he feels so real, I’ll never be rid of the sensation. He’s solid and constant, living with me not just an affair I’ll have once a month. Not fake. Not imaginary. Not a daydream.

  Relief washes over me, and I let my hands slip from on top of his, my body relaxing.

  “No, I’m not afraid of you, Jiro. If anything, I love you even more now.”

  Jiro squeezes me. “I love you, too, Sanaa. I especially love when you pin me down and take control.”

  His body and mine shake in giggles, and I sit up and smack him on the chest. “Watch out or I’ll do it more often.”

  “Try me.”

  Hmmm, tempting, especially when he’s gazing so intently at me like this, and my heart is beating with excitement. Is this how it’s going to be with us? Fun and thrilling and loving and a little dangerous at all times?

  He grabs my shirt and tugs. “Come on. Show me who’s boss.”

  I lick my dry lips and think, what should I go for first? His arms? His chest? But then the door chimes, and Jiro falls back on the bed with a grunt and a sigh. “Just when things were getting good.”

  I twist up my hair, straighten myself out, and find Sakai and Usagi waiting in the hallway. I’m glad Jiro and I are the only people authorized to this apartment.

  “Koichi and I have been talking about this all morning,” he says, coming straight in with no greeting. Hello, Sakai. Nice to see you too. “We think Matsuda is too much of a wild card to trust right now. We’ve called a meeting of all three heads of the clans, and we’re going to out ourselves to them. Tonight.” He stops at the couch, but I’m frozen by the door, overcome with situational whiplash. Events change quickly around here.

  “What?” Jiro and I ask at the same time. Usagi remains silent.

  “You heard me. Tonight, as in…” He looks at the wall clock. The time is 2:15 now. “Five hours and fifteen minutes from now. Do whatever you need to do to get ready for this. We’re meeting in the general assembly room on the first floor of the Ame Okiya, and Usagi will brief you on all the exits and escape routes.”

  “I have everything set, Sakai-san.” Usagi gestures to the tablet in his hand.

  “Sanaa, how do you want to do this?”

  “What? What do you mean how do I want to do this? You don’t have a plan?” Panic. I’m panicking and spurred into pacing the room, back and forth. “Aren’t I a little under-qualified for this sort of thing?”

  “I spoke with Jiro about what happened last night in the alley,” Sakai says, and my head snaps at Jiro. Jiro quickly looks at the ceiling. I narrow my eyes at him. “He said you were quick to think on your feet and performed well under pressure. I thought you might want to go into this meeting with no real plan and see what happens.”

  “Are you serious?” My voice cracks, and Jiro winces. Wait! Deep breath. He may have an idea here. I do work better when I go in and fly by the seat of my pants. Just a little forethought, that’s all.

  “Okay. This is what we do.”

  * * * *

  We stride into the Ame Okiya eight people deep. Sakai and Koichi followed by a guard in front, Jiro and me together, and Usagi brings up the rear with two other men. Paper screens are moved aside for us, but no one dares to speak or direct us. Without being asked to we kick off our sandals at the door and not bother to put any of them away. Two okiya staff members scramble in our wake to line them up as we walk down the hallway.

  I have the escape routes mapped out in my head, and Kazenoho on my back. Actually, everyone but Sakai and Koichi carry weapons. I wonder if Sakai has ever held a katana. He must have. I can imagine one in his hand. It’s not a stretch.

  As we approach the okiya meeting room, a rush of adrenaline comes coursing into my veins with every heartbeat. I take a deep breath and smooth out the front of my butter yellow kimono, glancing at Sakai, Koichi, and Jiro all next to me. I hope I don’t regret anything I say tonight. I’m usually pretty good about holding my tongue, but I cannot be held accountable when there is this much
anxiety in me, addling my brain and causing my stomach to clench. I spent most of the afternoon pacing the apartment.

  We stop and form up outside of the last screen door to the meeting room, and two okiya staff members slide them open for us. Sakai and Koichi are blocking my view but they immediately walk in and to the right. I enter forward and stand at the table, Jiro beside me. Several men on the other side sit seiza. They all distanced themselves from each other, and I smile lightly. When was the last time Yoshinori Minamoto, Tomio Miura, and Noburo Maeda were in the same room together? Probably never.

  I let everyone file into the room and sit seiza first before I take the center position — Jiro at my left, Sakai and Koichi to my right, Usagi at my back. I look at each of these men in the eye as dispassionately as I can. I’ve watched them for so long, and now they are in front of me. Don’t blow it, Sanaa.

  I am not surprised Matsuda is hanging back behind Miura. His eyes are steady on me behind the hair falling over his face, no doubt thinking of our meeting last night. Things are not going according to his plan. He leans forward to whisper in Miura’s ear. Surprise hits Miura’s face, and he is about to speak out and try to get the first word in. Not happening.

  “You would do best to listen to Sakai-san before you make a very… big… mistake.” The words are out of my mouth before I can even check myself.

  Sakai lightly clears his throat.

  “Thank you for coming on such short notice. I know scheduling is difficult when we all have important business to attend to.” He stops to bow. You’re so diplomatic, Sakai.

  “We are less than a year away from launch of our first ship to Yūsei, and it’s time you heard the truth.”

  Maeda huffs. “The truth of what, Sakai? Who is this little girl?”

  “This little girl,” I say, meeting his cold, hard glare, “is your empress. You will not refer to me in such a manner again.” I may be a small, twenty year old girl, but I can command a man now. I need to believe I’m in control, even if I feel very far from it. Maeda will not respect me if I don’t command respect. “If you know what’s best for you, you will bow to me now.”

  Minamoto, the smartest of the bunch, is already making his way to the floor, forehead touched to the tatami.

  Koichi whistles low. “I’d bow if I were you. Sanaa does not take kindly to this sort of insubordination.”

  I take the index finger of my right hand and point it directly at Maeda moving it slowly to the mat. A small evil smile comes over my face as Miura and Matsuda bow. Maeda is the last to touch his forehead to the mat, and I will not forget it. I have a limited amount of time to gain this man’s respect before he tries to kill me because I just insulted his status in front of everyone. I better give a lot of thought as to how to win him over.

  “Thank you, gentleman. I am Sanaa Itami, last in the Kiku line, and rightful heir to the Chrysanthemum Throne.” Sakai eyes me out of my peripheral vision. I had been thinking about my name in the back of my head since I found out the truth of my family. I love my first name, but I want to carry my mother’s name now. Griffin doesn’t sound right to me anymore.

  “If you need proof, we will provide it. I am not as dead as youonce thought I was. My mother, Junko Itami, was prepared to take the throne, and, in her absence, it is my duty to unite us all on Yūsei. Before colonization, I will ask each of you to support me in my rule of New Japan. I am prepared to take us there together, as one nation, and I will not tolerate war amongst the clans or against non-Japanese. We must work together or all hope will be lost.”

  Miura is the first to interrupt. “What makes you think…”

  I raise my hand to silence him, and Jiro jerks his hand to Oninoten. The motion is not lost on Miura. He settles back on his feet and Jiro relaxes.

  “I am supported by Sakai clan currently. I am giving each of you five days to think this over carefully. You will either support me along with Sakai or you will be against me. Let there be no ambiguity in this. I will consider your lives forfeit if you do not support me. I have the best wishes of Nishikyōand Yūsei at heart. You will concede if you want what’s best for your people.”

  I turn to Sakai and nod my head. He looks at each of them. “Minamoto, Miura, and Maeda, you will deliver your answers to me within five days.”

  “If you have business with me, you take it up with Sakai-san. No one else but him speaks for me. Wakarimasu ka?”

  They all nod to me.

  “Very well.” I rise to go and am happy each man bows immediately as I stand. The doors open, and I walk out with everyone at my rear.

  That’s how I like it. Short, sweet, and to the point. Now we wait.

  Chapter

  Thirty-Two

  I am plagued by nightmares all night long. It’s the first time I ever dream of the colonization. I’m on a ship, backed into a corner by Miura, his sword held high, and I have nothing to defend myself. A door closes, and the air in the room is sucked out around me. Stars. It’s night, and I’m in a field of tall grass that sways and swirls at my feet, alive. I try to move and get out but the grass claws at my clothes, pulling me and pushing me so I can’t run anywhere, can’t lift my feet, can’t move. I strip off my pants and shirt so the grass has nothing to hold on to, but it climbs up my skin. I scream but my voice is silent.

  “Sanaa, wake up.”

  “No, no! Get it off of me. Get it off!” I jump up out of bed, sweating and panting but unable to see anything in the pitch black.

  It takes a moment to properly wake up and realize I am actually out of bed in my apartment, Jiro’s profile lit by the numbers from the clock face, and not being dragged to my death by living grass.

  “Come back to bed, love,” Jiro says, his arm extended out for me. “It was just a dream.”

  I stand and blink my eyes at the bed a few times to make sure nothing is there, nothing but Jiro. I climb back in bed next to him half asleep.

  “Do you want to tell me about it?” Jiro asks as he puts his arm around me. Looking at the clock, the time is 3:35.

  I shake my head. “No. I just remember grass. That’s it.” I blow out a deep breath. “I haven’t had nightmares in weeks. Sorry. Sorry I woke you.”

  “It’s fine, Sanaa, I doubt you’ll remember anything in the morning.”

  I’ll be thankful for that. I’m becoming increasingly afraid of what’s going to happen to me in the colonization. Too many things could go wrong.

  “Jiro, what scares you? It seems like nothing does.” I pull at his shirt and let the fabric snap back against his body.

  “Of course I get scared.” He hugs me, yawning at the same time. “What scares me most is losing my family, losing the people I love. So when I do family business and I’m close to drawing my sword to defend myself, you, or anyone else, the first thing I think about is losing the fight and how I can’t, but I set the fear aside and not let it control me.”

  I have got to figure out how to make it easy for me, as well. Right now, I try to control my fear in so many different ways: physical exercising, pacing, talking, hmmm, yes, even sex. I should pick something and stick with it.

  Jiro swipes away the hair on my neck and kisses me there. “With time, you can get better at managing fear. The fear you can control, at least. We’ll have to work on the other things.”

  Someday he is going to make me go back outside again. I’m not looking forward to it.

  * * * *

  6:45am and I can’t fall back to sleep. Even lying here listening to Jiro’s rhythmic breathing, all I can think about is the meeting we had last night, and the pros and cons list I’ve been making in my head for and against running away from all of this nonsense. I need to get up and get the day started. I’ll nap later.

  While I’m standing in the kitchen in my pajamas measuring coffee grounds, the door softly chimes and the read-out says it’s Mark Sakai. He’s up early, too.

  I open the door to let him in, and he’s the most dressed down I have ever seen him, black t-shir
t and gray pants. My eyes are immediately drawn to his neck and upper arms, the glimpse of the tattoos I have been waiting to see for months. The edge of a traditional samurai warrior design? I want to order him to take off his shirt right now, and the thought makes me giggle.

  “Ohayo, Sanaa-chan. What’s so funny?”

  “Nothing,” I say smiling and shaking my head.

  “I received news this morning and couldn’t go back to sleep. Can I come in?”

  “Of course, Mark. I’m making coffee. Do you want some tea? Jiro has some.”

  “Is he awake?”

  “No. Not yet.” I let him in and close the door.

  “Yes, tea sounds good.”

  He watches me while he sits down at the kitchen table. “Up late, Sanaa?”

  “No, actually. We went to bed early after the meeting. Well, after some sake. Just a rough night of sleep.” Jiro and I decided to sit and play drinking games last night, and we had a lot of fun. We were loud and obnoxious, though. It’s a good thing neither of my neighbors are going to complain.

  “Mark, did you walk over here like that?” I point to his shirt. Only his hair is put together. I wonder if he ever takes it out of his ponytail.

  “Sanaa,” he says with a laugh, “I don’t think you realize I live three floors above you in the penthouse.”

  “Really? Oh, Mark, sorry. I never thought to ask where you live.” He must think I’m the biggest, most insensitive jerk right now. I have often wondered where he sleeps at night, what his place looks like, what he does when he’s not with me. He does have a whole other life outside of what we do every day, but I never wanted to pry.

  I pour hot water from the electric kettle for him and put the canister of tea bags on the table so he can choose.

  “This building is home base for everyone in my clan. Basically, everything in a five block radius on either side of here is Sakai territory. Nobody comes within a block of this building unless they’re being watched by our security. The Itōdōjō is barely on the outskirts of our territory which is why Matsuda often spies on you without getting caught… though not anymore. You didn’t know this?”