by West, Maven
I touched my face. “What does that mean?” What did he agree with? He was so unlike me it wasn’t funny.
“Pissing Ana off would be bad for the both of us,” he said.
“See, I knew you were seeing her to better your chances with her father,” I said through clenched teeth.
The waitress placed our basket of mozzarella sticks between us.
“At first no, I didn’t even know who were father was. I met her at a nightclub, I fucked her three days later. She didn’t tell me who her dad was until I drove her to his office so she could pick up money from him,” Carter explained.
“At your brother’s graduation,” I pointed out.
Carter raised an eyebrow. “Bullshit. We went back to her place.”
“Why would she tell me that?”
He shook his head. “I haven’t the slightest idea. I have one brother and he graduated a long time ago.”
I couldn’t understand why Ana would need to lie about where she had sex with Carter the first time. Why would I care where it happened?
Or was Carter lying?
That made no sense, why would a guy like Carter lie about fucking a girl at his brother’s graduation? He wouldn’t, he would own it.
That only meant one thing. Ana lied, and for whatever reason I didn’t know.
***
I dropped the Styrofoam container of my lunch on my counter, shaking my shoes off before I headed for my normal spot in the living room.
A stack of mail sat on the coffee table calling out to me. It had been some time since I paid my bills; I was surprised they hadn’t shut some of them off. I thanked Eric for setting some of them up on automatic bill pay otherwise I would be living by candle light and dumping my pee out the window.
I tossed the junk mail aside and tore open the credit card statement. I really needed to start paying attention to our mail. I skimmed down the transactions from the delinquent statement and sat up.
“We never used this card,” I muttered to myself. I opened the junk drawer beside the couch it could wait until tomorrow. And then I would call the credit card company and give them a piece of my mind.
I stopped short, my hand hovering the drawer. I pulled the receipt from beneath several other credit card bills that I never noticed before. I couldn’t remember the last time I was even in the drawer to be honest.
I scratched at my temple staring at the hotel’s emblem at the top of the receipt. The place was out of town and Eric and I never been there before. I fumbled with the paper looking at the date.
My heart sink.
I bit my lip, looking around the room as if the answers were there waiting for me. It was like a cruel joke. A sick joke of sorts, that I just so happened to open the junk drawer. The one place in my house I hated to touch because it wasn’t mine. I was clean and Eric was untidy. It was his one space that I didn’t complain about.
And once he died I didn’t care anymore about being tidy. Looking around the apartment at my dirty clothes laying on the floor it was apparent.
I touched my temple closing my eyes, bringing my knees to my chest, I wrapped my arms around them and lost it. I was numb.
I screamed, my nails cutting into my palms, this wasn’t what I needed.
Chapter thirteen
I needed to pull it together.
I wiped my eyes pulling myself up from the floor; the coffee table was knocked over in my complete meltdown. And I didn’t care.
I paced the room. Was I really about to call the hotel?
Phone in hand I dialed the number.
“Lux Royal, Marge speaking?” The woman on the other end said politely.
I swallowed. “Yes, I know this sounds crazy, but I wanted to find out if you could tell me about something I found on my husband’s receipt and credit card statement.”
The line grew silent, and finally she spoke. “That depends on what you’re looking for.”
I sighed. “My husband died in a car accident. And tonight I found a receipt that came from your hotel. We were never there together.” I pursed my lips, hoping his death was enough to gain some sympathy. I needed to know.
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Can you help me?”
“I just went through an awful divorce; men are not on my good list right now. What did you say your name was again sir?” She said.
I smiled. “Eric Daniels.”
There was a long pause, with the faint sound that I was sure were her fingers clicking across the keys of a computer. Thank god for bitter wives I thought to myself.
“It shows Eric Daniels checked in on April 7th. Into one of our vip suites.”
My stomach hurt the moment she told me the news. “Is there any way to know who he was with?”
“Well, we know it wasn’t you. I’m sure you have a good imagination.”
I closed my eyes. “Thank you. It means a lot what you did for me.”
“You’re welcome, I’m sorry you had to find this out after such a loss. Have a nice night.” The call ended.
I would have thrown myself into traffic as long as this feeling stopped.
I dropped down onto the couch.
The moment Eric and I met I thought was magical, it was all disintegrating in the matter of minutes. One simple phone call crushed my entire reality.
If this was real and true than that meant Eric wasn’t who I thought he was at all. I didn’t know what the meant for me. But I knew one thing, I needed to know for certain or I was going to drive myself crazy.
Running across my apartment I threw open the closet in our bedroom. I used my tiptoes to help me reach the black box that sat for months unopened on the top shelf of our closet. The box that housed everything Eric kept under lock and key. His important paperwork and whatever else he found necessary to lock away.
I pulled it down almost falling backwards in the process and dropped it on the floor. Eric kept a baseball bat in our closet, a pass time he gave up a year after we married.
I caught sight of a photo of us on the end table raising the baseball bat above my head. I prayed he didn’t prove me wrong. The baseball bat smashed into the box, and after two more swings I was staring at dented and broken metal. As well as papers and photo debris at my feet.
I dropped the baseball bat with a thud at my feet, dropping to my knees. With trembling hands I lifted the first envelope, I covered my mouth staring at the handwriting. I understood why it looked so familiar.
It was a love letter, a love letter addressed to my husband from someone other than me. I dropped the letter too disgusted to read anymore of it.
I lifted the flash drive, grateful I hadn’t damaged it in my violent rage. Seconds later I was on the bed with my laptop waiting for my computer to load whatever was on the drive.
I double clicked the mouse and gritted my teeth as I stared at her. With shaking hands I clicked the next picture. And the next one, until Eric’s smiling face stared at me. There was no denying what I saw.
He was there, with another woman in the hotel room.
Oh what a fool I had been.
I snapped the computer shut and threw it down on the bed.
I ran for my phone, dialing the only person that could help me.
I grabbed a fistful of hair as I forced my words out. “Please come over right now. I need you.”
Chapter fourteen
“Why is your door wide open?” Jon asked, coming inside and locking the door behind him.
I shrugged. It didn’t matter, I didn’t have the energy to answer it when he came knocking.
He looked around my apartment at dirty clothes and piles of mail. “When’s the last time you cleaned up in here?”
Another shrug was all he got.
He lifted a newspaper from my chaise lounge and took a seat, hands on his blue jeans as he tried to make sense. He rubbed his forehead. “I came right over here because you were hysterical. Now I’m here and you’re calm. What the fuck is going on?”
; “Eric was seeing Ana.” Another twist of my heart, I hated the sound of it. “And before you tell me I’m crazy I have proof.”
Jon tilted his head to the side. “Say that again.”
I didn’t want to say it again. “He was seeing Ana behind my back. There are pictures on the computer in my bedroom. They were at a hotel two days before he died.”
Jon ran a hand through his brown hair. “I’m sorry.” He dropped his hands down on his leg again. “I- I’m shocked.”
“You’re shocked,” I said, at a loss for words. No matter how many times I said it I was numb to the idea that Eric would cheat on me.
But the pictures were all the proof in the world. He was in bed with my friend. She was wearing lingerie that I helped her pick out.
“Everything I thought, it just disappeared. It was all one huge lie all the way up until the day he died.” I shook my head.
“None of us are perfect. That’s the point I have been trying to get through to you all this time.” Jon said. “Eric was human just like the rest of us.”
“Eric fucked my friend,” I let out a heavy sigh.
“What does that tell you?”
“That he was nothing but a fraud, that would have ruined my life dead or alive,” I slammed my fist on the table, and jumped up, digging through the kitchen drawer.
Jon stood behind me. “What are you doing?”
“I’m going to get rid of everything in this house that reminds me of him.” I dumped the drawer on the floor, his wedding band rolling across the floor, and I pulled mine from my finger.
“Morgan, knock it off.” Jon said, watching me yank my window open.
“Why, because I’m not handling my feelings the right way?” Time and time again he told me to let go. Well, now I would let go.
I released the fine metal, leaving the window open.
Jon shut it. “You’re angry. You’re not letting go your being destructive.”
I kicked the plant Eric bought me on our first anniversary over, spilling dirt across the carpet. “I am angry and it feels good. It feels better than depressed.”
I went for the pictures on the wall, ready to claw them down. Jon grabbed me. “Anger and depression do nothing for you. Be something else,” he insisted, gripping my shoulders.
I pushed him into the wall, my lips on his. He took me by the neck, his other hand sliding down my body. I pushed into him, moaning against his mouth as his hands lifted my dress and slipped past my underwear.
Finally I could feel what it was like to kiss Jon for what he was, a man that had a whole lot more going for him than my husband. I pulled his shirt over his head, kissing him, consuming his flesh with my tongue.
I tore his belt from his jeans, throwing it across the room hurrying to get his pants down. I freed him from his pants, palming the length of him, his tongue trailed along my bottom lip, and then he bit down, pressing himself into me, pinning my hands above my head against the wall.
I rubbed against him. “I want you right now. Put me out of my misery.”
Jon released my hands, pulling my dress over my head. He kissed down my body, releasing my breast, squeezing them. I wrapped my legs around him, as he steadied me against the wall pulling my panties to the side. His fingers grazed my clit and with a few quick rubs he forced himself inside of me.
I dropped my head back, relieved to feel him, relieved not to feel angry. We worked together, my hips moving at a quick beat, his hands holding me by the waist.
He squeezed my ass, pushing himself even deeper. We slid to the floor, I pressed my hands into his chest, moving up and down. My hands pressed against his stomach flattening against the muscles of his abdomen.
I made another slow swirl, watching Jon react. Our fingers tangled together as I continued to move against him. He freed one of his hands rubbing my clit in circles.
I doubled over, dropping my head forward, my hair spilling on his chest and like no time before I did what I wanted to do all along. I shuddered around his the length of him, coming undone, my hips grinding and rocking, my nails digging into his flesh as I let the orgasm take over.
I stopped moving. My heart thudding against my insides at a wicked rate of speed, Jon, touched my face. “You did it.”
I smirked, biting at my lip, my entire body throbbing from the letdown. “I did.”
He pulled me by the chin, his lips pressing into mine so perfectly. “We need to talk about this.”
Chapter fifteen
Jon ran a hand down my arm, his lips pressed into my shoulder. “You need to tell Ana that you know.”
I laughed out loud. “If I go anywhere near Ana I fear for her safety.” I couldn’t guarantee I wouldn’t kill her or attempt to.
I smoothed his hair back on his head. It felt good to be in someone’s arms again.
“No you wouldn’t. I know you, and if I thought you would kill her I would even be telling you to do this. That’s how much faith I have in you.” Jon’s fingertips skimmed my jawline.
I couldn’t believe I never saw it coming. That I was so stupid, was she laughing behind my back this entire time? Did it even matter to her?
Or was she just that awful of a human being that she would go around ruining other people’s lives without a second thought.
I sat up. Jon slid a hand across my back, his nails toying with my flesh.
“I guess it makes the most sense,” I sighed. “If I tell her, then I can move on with my life and get rid of every negative thing and start over.”
I could heal, something I wanted more than anything. Now Eric was a bitter reminder of fake happiness, nothing more than that.
“What would you do if you found out your wife did something so awful?” Jon knew what losing someone felt like. He lost his wife.
I couldn’t read him, his eyes grew dark. “I think maybe I’d feel like it was my out. It would feel like I didn’t have to grieve for her anymore. Who would want to feel anything for a person who could do something so wrong?”
He was right. And in a sick twisted way maybe it was fate. Maybe I wasn’t meant to go on mourning someone I couldn’t have.
“How do you tell your friend you know she slept with your husband?” That was the big question. I tapped my finger against my lips.
“You just say it. Don’t think about it, you don’t have to have a plan. You just tell her that you know and you end things. You move on with your life.” Jon kissed my forehead.
I mowed it over, watching as he dressed himself. “You’re leaving already?”
“I have another meeting in the morning. And you have some fences to mend.”
“More like tear down,” I smirked.
His smile wavered as he looked at me. “Think with your head. Or I might have to bail you out of jail.”
***
Jon was gone, my finger hovered over the call button of my cell phone. I never had to confront anyone before. I didn’t know how to do it. But I wasn’t stupid I could figure it out.
The phone rang. “Hey, Morgan.”
I forced a smile. “Ana. Hey what’s up?”
“Laying by the pool. And yourself?
“I was thinking about going to lunch. Did you want to join me?”
“Of course, I feel like it’s been forever since I’ve seen you.” She paused. “Do you want to meet up or should I come get you first?”
“Let’s meet up,” I said.
Chapter sixteen
There she sat, applying lip gloss as I approached the table at the café we agreed to meet at. I did my best to hold it together, the best I could do for the sake of us both.
“Morgan,” Ana said, she pocketed her lip gloss and flashed me a big smile. Oh how I wanted to roll my eyes.
I sat down across from her. “Nice color.” I wondered if it was the same shade she wore when she put her lips all over my husband.
“Thanks, do you want to try some?” She offered the tube. I waved a hand, lifting my menu instead.
With my
face shielded I could come out with it a lot easier. Now that I was there, smelling her perfume, listening to her voice, I didn’t have it in me to stay that much longer.
“I guess I should just come out and say it,” I started.
“Say what?” Ana said.
“I want to say something,” I said, struggling to find the right words to get it over with.
I wondered if she sensed what was coming. I doubted it, she seemed rather heartless if you asked me.
I lowered the menu and picked up my ice water, an ice cube almost lodging in my throat at the sight of Carter taking a seat across from me at the table.
“You didn’t tell me Carter was coming with you,” I choked out. I wiped water from the corner of my mouth. Oh this was getting better and better by the minute.
I watched her hand squeeze his thigh, her thumb grazing the seam of his jeans a little too close to the part of him I wished she would keep her hands off of now that I knew him better.
“Carter had some news to tell me about,” Ana said, she shrugged. “I’m sure whatever you want to say can wait or if it’s not too emotional you can tell the two of us.”
I scratched my neck, my lips pressing together. “Carter doesn’t need to hear what I have to say. I’d much prefer to talk about it just the two of us. If you don’t mind.”
Carter furrowed his eyebrows. “No problem.” He got up.
Ana stopped him standing up herself. “I need to pee. After that we can order our food and talk outside. Carter won’t mind waiting will you, babe?”
“Yeah, sure.” Carter scratched his head confused.
I turned to him as soon as she left the table. “I brought her here to confront her.”
“Sorry if this makes no sense to me. I don’t know what you mean.”
I sighed. “Ana slept with my husband. And I just found out. So I am here to tell her that I know.”
He threw his hands up. “You got to be fucking kidding me right now.”