by West, Maven
I took a deep breath letting it go. “What are you getting pissed about? You weren’t the one married to the man. I was. You’re just fucking the slut bag that ruined my life.”
Carter shook his head. “The guy is dead. He cheated on you, looks like he gladly participated. Why does it matter anymore?”
I winced, a bit bothered that he would make light of such a thing. “Because we are friends, and she is running around acting as if it doesn’t matter. How would you feel?”
He lifted his hands, palms to the ceiling. “I wouldn’t care, because anyone who says they care about you wouldn’t make such a dumb ass move.”
I swallowed, looking away.
“I might not understand, but I do see that you’re hurt.” He touched my arm. “But for the sake of everything going on right now will you agree to let it go. It’s not going to solve anything.”
I leaned in my hand on my knee. “I’m not trying to do anything besides move on. This fixes so much. It’s my out, my freedom card to move the fuck on with my life.”
Carter nodded. “Don’t let her have the satisfaction of knowing she ruined something in your life.”
“She’s going to do the same to you,” I told him.
He sat back in his chair. “I’m a lot smarter than I look.”
“You’re dating a liar,” I argued.
“I’m not dating her. I’m not looking for a relationship with Ana.” He extended his hand. “Let me see your phone.”
I furrowed my brow. “For what?”
I handed it over; certain Ana would be back any minute.
“I wanted to tell you something. It’s good news.” Carter punched his number into my cell phone. “And I need your number to do that.”
I took my phone back. “Did you get the part?”
He brought a finger to his lips. “I’m going to call you.”
Pressing my fist against my mouth I gave in. “Fine. Call me, and maybe during that phone call we can discuss all the reasons you need to drop her before she ruins your life.”
Carter leaned back, arms crossed, a smile on his perfect face. “I’d almost think that was you trying to act like you gave a shit about my well being. I thought I was an asshole.”
“I care about you because I don’t want to see you date a slutbag?”
The bathroom door opened. God why did she have to come back I thought feeling miserable.
“Okay are we ready?” Ana asked.
I stood up, slinging my purse over my shoulder. “Actually, I have to go. My mom called and she is going to be in town soon. So we can talk another time, it wasn’t anything major.”
Carter relaxed looking away from the two of us.
Maybe he was right. It would be more satisfying to Ana than myself to divulge my knowledge. I knew how bad it felt to be miserable; did I want to ruin whatever was going on with Carter to have a few minutes of an argument with Ana?
I didn’t.
I would let it be—for now.
And now that I knew Carter programmed his number in my phone, I felt a little better about walking away without a victory.
Chapter seventeen
I watched as the lighting crashed out my bedroom window. Thunderstorms were the perfect sleep inducer. They calmed me, and I really needed a way to sedate myself and drift off to sleep.
A way to break away from my pent up rage, a way to forget just for a couple hours that what once was my life was now transformed into something unrecognizable.
I turned away from the window, closing my eyes as the roll of thunder growled in the background.
My phone lit up, along with my room, I fumbled with the buttons, trying to figure out who would be calling me so late.
I rolled my eyes, dropping my feet to the floor. “Why can’t you just drop dead already?”
I didn’t want to talk to Ana. I wanted to punch her, and pretending to be a caring human being proved harder and harder each time I dealt with her.
I hit the button and closed my eyes. “Hey.”
“You have to come out tonight. This bar is packed with men,” her shrill tone slapped me in the eardrum. “Please.”
I wondered if the reason she called the widow was because no other girl’s could stand to be around her. It was all starting to make sense. I opened my closet, ignoring Eric’s suit that I was going to donate to a homeless shelter when I got home.
I pulled out the last thing in my closet, a tight dress that hadn’t seen the light of day since I bought it a year ago and refused to wear it. I needed to catch up on laundry I thought tossing the dress over my shoulder.
“I’ll come out, but I’m bringing a friend.” I told her. I rifled through the dresser and found a jean skirt.
“Did you meet someone?” She asked sounding more amazed than happy if that were the case.
“I made a friend at the last grief meeting I went to,” I said, working myself out of my shirt.
She sighed. “Oh no, how depressed is she? Did her husband just die or has it been some time?”
I bit my tongue, balancing the phone against my shoulder. “Is Carter going to be coming tonight?” I wasn’t about to humor her and even give that question an answer.
“I don’t know,” she said. “Let’s have a girl’s night. I’ve already saw Carter a couple of times this week.”
“Alright, I will see you in a little bit,” I said ending the call before she could say anything else.
I hopped in the shower, and did my best in fifteen minutes to get ready for the night out. Even if I had to ignore Ana, at least scouring the bar for a potential hookup would be worth it.
Or maybe Abbi would be great company and we would make bar hopping are new thing to do without Ana.
***
I shut the door to the lexus. “Wow, Abbi this is a pretty sweet car.”
Abbi chirped her alarm and smoothed her hair behind her ear. “My husband came from a wealthy family. And when he died his family was more than generous with his assets.”
I raised an eyebrow impressed. “You mean nobody fought you over money or anything?”
With a swing of the head, Abbi’s straight hair danced around her shoulders. “They have plenty of their own money. Besides, they knew how he felt about leaving me behind.”
Their love was sweet. So sweet I almost smacked right into the door of the bar thinking about how lucky she was to have a man like him.
“Is everything alright?” Abbi asked, she handed over her license.
“Yeah, fine.” I sighed. “I sort of realized that a big part of my marriage was a joke. And as much as I try to hide it it still hurts.”
She gave a sympathetic smile, touching my arm. “I’m sorry.”
I ignored the sympathy Abbi tried to shell out. “I’m fine. If anything I think it’s for the best.”
I was sure she thought that I was crazy. But I didn’t care. I experienced crazy once. I thought I was crazy for Eric and then it all fell apart in the matter of minutes. It was funny how a few minutes could destroy something so fast.
“So what now?” She asked.
I shrugged. “I don’t know, I don’t think I’ve thought that far into things. I know I would love to meet somebody who made me feel that way again. Only this time let it be real.”
Abbi bit her lip smiling. “That would be nice. I’m worried Joey set the bar to high. Or am I just crazy?”
At one time I would have said that she wasn’t. “You were happy, that’s a good thing to remember. And its good to strive to have that again. There’s nothing wrong with that.”
“What about you?” Abbi waited patiently to hear my answer.
“There’s been guys,” I said. Lots of guys. I wasn’t about to tell her that though. “I can’t say there has been too much of a connection with anyone, I’ve held back because of Eric.”
“But not anymore?” Abbi asked.
“Not anymore. Now I am ready and willing. Just waiting for the right one to show up.” I fiddled with
the strap of my tank top.
“Prince charming, that’s who I’m waiting for,” Abbi said with a sigh.
“Not me, I’ll take Mr. been there done that,” I said. Like Carter I thought to myself. He was a breath of fresh air, air I wanted to breathe.
Ana waved fighting through a slew of men to get to the doors, clad in her famous plunging neck line dress. “I thought you would never get here.”
I raised an eyebrow. “So you drink yourself stupid?”
She shot me a confident smile crossing her arms. “You should see the boys here tonight.”
Abbi and I took the scenery in. “This is a crowd, that’s for sure.”
I nodded my head in Abbi’s direction once Ana started shooting daggers into my new gal pal. “Ana, Abbi, Abbi this is Ana.”
They shook hands, Ana gripped my shoulder steering me through the crowd to her table.
I took a seat, surprised to see a man at it. Abbi ran her hand through her hair, her eyebrows going together. The poor girl wasn’t used to this social atmosphere and I felt for her.
“Ana, aren’t you going to introduce us to your two beautiful friends?” The guy said, winking in her direction.
I studied the college ring he wore on his finger.
“This is Ana, and her friend.” She took her spot beside the blonde.
“How do you know Ana?” He asked, taking a swig of his beer.
I bit my tongue on my little secret and settled for a different response. “Ana used to work at the office I work at.”
She laughed. “Until I was fired, what can I say I’m not office material like Morgan.” She ran a hand through her hair, her hand patting the football jock on the leg.
Abbi raised an eyebrow. “Where did the two of you meet?”
Ana exchanged glances with her pal. “We’ve done lunch a couple times.”
“Amongst other things,” he grinned, and slipped an arm around Ana.
I dropped down from the stool. “I’m gonna get drinks. Abbi you want to come?”
Abbi followed eager to escape. “She’s interesting.” She watched from the bar as Ana hung all over the guy at our table.
“Oh she is,” I said, digging my wallet from my pocket. “Two beers please.”
Abbi twirled her hair around her finger, and gasped. “Judging from the looks of that guy he must think so too.”
I turned around, glancing around the bar.
Chapter eighteen
I grabbed our beers and pushed through the crowd to get back to the table where Ana was busy groping the new guy in front of everyone. Including her so called boy toy Carter.
Abbi followed on my heels eager to get in on the action. “This is different than my usual nights. He looks like he might kick that guy’s ass. Is that her boyfriend?”
Ana did a double take shocked to see Carter heading for the table.
“I thought you were home sick tonight, Ana.” Carter said, rubbing the back of his neck.
Ana’s eyes were ready to pop out of her head. “I-I was, but I took some Tylenol and felt better.”
I took my seat, ready to watch the showdown.
“I can totally see that,” he said. “I’m going to go get a drink. Anyone want anything?”
Abbi shook her head, I raised my beer indicating I was all set.
“You want another one?” He raised an eyebrow at me.
I shrugged. “I suppose so. What the hell.”
Carter kept his eyes on me. “Then get your ass up and help me carry drinks back to the table.”
I raised an eyebrow.
He nodded his head, as if whatever he was thinking I understood and I had not a clue.
Ana reached for Carter’s arm, stroking the tattoos on his forearm. “Babe, are you upset?”
Carter flexed his jaw, leaning down and planting a kiss on her lips. His lips devouring hers in the most dazzling pda I ever witnessed.
I clutched my chest, shooting a look in Abbi’s direction. She too seemed to pick up on the sexual electricity Carter exuded.
Ana gripped his belt buckle letting go after the lip lock was over.
“Why would I be upset?” Carter asked, giving her every opportunity to explain why he would be.
The blonde guy next to her shifted in his seat. “I think I need to head out.”
Carter stopped him. “By all means, hang out. Don’t think twice about it buddy. We’re all friends here.”
“Do you think he’s mad at me?” Ana asked. She smoothed her hair, watching Carter.
I rolled my eyes. “You told him you were sick and he catches you at a bar. Gee, what do you think?”
Ana didn’t get it. We watched every girl around the bar check Carter out. Was she that oblivious to how much of a hot commodity this guy was? Did she not see that just about anyone near him wiped drool from their mouth?
“Carter is hard to read.” She tried explaining, and I don’t think a single person at the table wanted to hear it. I was sure the guy desperate to leave didn’t. And I knew I didn’t.
Abbi clutched her beer, looking down at the table. “Well, are you two seeing each other?”
Ana shrugged. “Are we sleeping together?”
Abbi touched her face. “Whatever you want to call it.”
“Yes, we are sleeping together. That doesn’t mean he’s the guy I want or need.”
“He’s not what you want?” I asked. “Then why the hell are you leading him on?”
Ana refused to look at me. “Just stop. All you and every other girl sees is the hot piece of ass with the killer smile. He’s fucked up and he knows it. I’d be an idiot to fall for him or act as if I cared that much.”
I stood up walking away before I socked her right in her smug little face.
Carter was a sex toy to Ana.
Ana seemed to think she could have whatever she wanted. Including Eric. Was Eric just a romp, just a fling, a thrill? I wondered if she thought sleeping with my husband was worth it. Or if it was some sick game to her.
“So, am I standing next to the next big thing?” I asked, trying to inject some amusement into the moment.
Carter pushed off the bar. “I guess you’re going to have to wait until I call you to find that out.” He playfully pushed me.
I pushed him back. “It’s been days, you never planned on calling me.”
His lips parted. “So does that mean you were waiting to hear from me?”
“No, that doesn’t mean that at all.”
He stepped forward, erasing the distance between us. “What would make you want to come hang out with the girl who fucked your husband then?”
I swallowed, my hand grazing my mouth as I looked at him. “Boredom.”
He stroked his neck, nodding. “I can think of better things to do with your time than hanging out with Ana.”
I smiled. “I’m sure you could.”
Carter released a sigh, his expression softer, we locked eyes.
“What?” I asked.
He smiled, a sweet knee knocking smile. “You’re testing me.”
I raised an eyebrow. “I am?”
He moved closer, allowing the people behind him by, staring down at me. “You want me to give in first.”
I bit my lip, tilting my head to the side. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m just here to get my beer.”
Carter brushed my hair from my eyes. “Maybe I was right at one time. Now I think you’re mad at me.”
I opened my mouth, but stopped myself from saying anything more. I didn’t want to put him down.
“What do I have to be mad about?” I asked.
“Ana. I stopped you from telling her about your husband. And now she’s hanging out with that douche and I don’t say anything.” He shrugged.
I sighed. “She said your fucked up.”
“And she’s right. I’m not afraid to admit that.”
Boy did he have pride. “She also told me you weren’t the kind of guy she wanted to be with.”
/> “Oh did she now?” Carter eyes were on Ana.
“Yes, and as much as you want to say that you don’t care and that you guys aren’t a thing, I think it bothers you.” I could feel my heart beating in my chest.
“And that’s when I would tell you that your wrong,” Carter said.
I wanted him to see that I was worth his time, not Ana. “She’s not the girl for you.”
“I agree.” He shrugged. “So you can stop being mad at me. Let’s go back to giving in.”
“Giving in?” I asked, Carter leaned down, his mouth at my ear. He smelled amazing and I could feel the heat from his skin.
“See that hallway over there?”
I nodded, I hadn’t but I was sure if I needed to find it I could in a few seconds. This wasn’t my first rodeo.
He very discreetly led me down the hallway, we slipped into the darkness, the only light illuminating was from the lights in the parking lot. I leaned against the wall, staring him down. I refused to be some little bitch that gave in that easily.
He was going to work for what he wanted from me. And I was dying to find out what it was.
“They call this sexual frustration,” he said,smirking.
I nodded. “I think only one of us is frustrated.”
He touched my face, licking his lips. This was the moment, I was about to kiss him. “Every time I look at you, I can’t get the thought of your lips out of my mind. And what I want them to do to me.”
I was entranced. I wanted to hear more.
“I can see right through those pretty brown eyes.” He traced my jaw line with his fingertips, leaning even closer, challenging me to pull away. With my head against the wall I stared him down. “Amazing eyes.”
I swallowed.
He cocked his head to the side, his lips inches away from mine. “You ready to give in?”
Oh I was, but I was also stubborn. “Nope. If you want to kiss me then kiss me. I don’t beg.”
“You say that now,” he teased, a playful smirk on his face.
The moment was ours, the world ceased to exist and I didn’t hear anything but his voice egging me on.
I lifted my chin. “I’m not going to kiss you.”
“Why not?” He took me by the chin, bringing my lips to his. Softly he pressed his into mine, his other hand on my ass guiding me against him, pressing our bodies together.