by West, Maven
Carter politely smiled at them; I smoothed his hair back and let him lead me by the hand out of the store.
We continued walking down the sidewalk hand in hand. I noticed, I wondered if he did.
I found the courage to look at him. “That was close.”
Carter smiled. “Not close enough. We need to finish what we started.”
I couldn’t agree more. But one thing was bothering me and I needed to say something before I burst. “This doesn’t feel wrong?”
Carter rubbed the back of his neck. “It feels right. It feels really fucking right.”
I tried to let go of his hand before we were caught in public, but he squeezed mine even tighter. So I held on, maybe he didn’t care if we were caught. Maybe, just maybe everything that was happening meant more than he was saying.
“I’m not taking you back to my place,” I said. I couldn’t it would be too strange.
“My place it is,” he said, hailing a taxi cab.
Chapter twenty one
“Get comfortable,” Carter said, tossing his keys on the coffee table in the middle of his living room.
He lived as I expected. A rather simple space, tidy, a big flat screen in the living room probably to watch some kind of sports and a kitchen with a pizza box and empty beer cans on the counter.
I sat down eyeing his laundry basket sitting beside the door.
“Are those Ana’s underwear?” I couldn’t believe I was in his apartment. And seeing his fiancé’s underwear was starting to freak me out.
I eyed the door, hoping it was locked and praying she didn’t have her own key, but who knew. He might have gone that far, he seemed crazy enough. He was willing to waste his life on a girl just to get a career in Hollywood.
Carter sat down next to me. “Are you thirsty?”
I shook my head. The moment had come and gone. I wasn’t sure if it would be that easy to bring it back again.
“You know she asked me to be her maid of honor,” I said.
Carter’s eyes widened. “You don’t let up do you?”
“I’m sorry this is just really strange.” I looked away, and started biting my nails.
Carter took my hand. “What can I do to put you at ease?”
“Assure me that Ana is not going to come through that door,” I said. I studied the clock on his wall, watching the hand move.
“Ana is not going to come over,” he assured me. “She doesn’t have a key either.”
I sighed, relaxing a bit. Carter placed a hand on my leg.
“You said life with your mom was hell,” I said. When I was nervous my mouth ran. And I was asking things I probably should have stayed away from.
“That it was. I was in and out of foster homes most of my life. She had a drug habit.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” I told him. “Do you talk to any of your family back home anymore?”
Carter rubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t discuss my life, anything you want to know I’ll just come right out and tell you. I’m fucked up, I have issues with woman, with relationships and trusting others.”
“Don’t we all?” I said.
“I’m sure, not everyone wants to admit it though.”
I admired him for being so honest. He didn’t have to tell me, he could keep it a secret and forever hide from the world if he wanted to. “I don’t think you’re so bad.”
Carter rubbed his bottom lip. “So you’re saying you’re a bad judge of character are you?”
I shoved him. “You’re too hard on yourself.”
“I don’t think I would say that. Ask all the woman that claim I emotionally fucked them. I bet they wouldn’t agree with you.” Carter tilted his head to the side, brushing my hair from my shoulder. “You’re beautiful.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” he said back.
We kissed.
“Is that why it doesn’t bother you, marrying Ana?” I crossed my arms studying his blank stare. “Are you planning on emotionally fucking her as well?”
His smile slowly grew. “How about you let me worry about that and let me fuck you.” He nipped my body lip pushing me down on his sofa.
I laughed, holding onto his t-shirt as we fell back. How could you argue with such a guy? Even when he said the ugliest things I still wanted him. I was sure everyone did.
And if after this I was as he put it emotionally fucked, so be it. The adventure was worth the risk. I wanted Carter Sterling to fuck me, even if he was damaged and going to hurt me in the end.
At least that was what I was saying right now.
When I kissed him again he caught my lip in between his teeth, I grabbed a hold of his hair, keeping him there. I slipped my hands underneath his shirt, enjoying the way his skin felt against my fingers. Carter groaned against my mouth, he tore his shirt over his head ending any curiosity about what was underneath.
He was flawless, my hands explored his perfect body, he was gorgeous the perfect amount of muscle under tan skin. And the tattoos on his arms added the extra bad ass sex appeal that made him even hotter to look at.
He hiked up my skirt, and my body ached knowing he had perfect access.
“God, your beautiful,” he said, his voice low as he looked at me.
I believed him as soon as he pressed himself against me, he was turned on, and as he lowered himself down onto me I closed my eyes enjoying the feel of him pinned between us, hard and thick.
God how I wanted him, every part of me needed him, I wiggled beneath him rubbing against him begging him to erase the distance his jeans were putting between us.
Warmth spread between my legs, I squeezed my thighs against him. A pleasurous shiver climbed my body every time he touched me. I could feel my heart beating, faster and faster every move he made.
He stole another kiss, settling between my legs, I moaned against his mouth; even his brilliant kiss couldn’t hide the sounds escaping me. Carter worked his hips, and I was his prisoner willing to do whatever he wanted. He circled his hips again, and I dug my nails into his back.
He kissed me harder, his thumb grazing my neck, and then my breast, teasing me with just a light touch before his hands slipped further, finding the curve of my waist and then my wiggling hips. He pinned me in place for just a moment, giving me another delicious tease of his hips and then his hands were around my thighs pulling me against him. He pushed against me.
“Are you ready to give in?”
I laughed, to turned on to argue with him. “I already have.”
He undid his belt, and before I let him do the rest I helped him with the zipper, freeing him from his jeans, his dick springing free. I stroked him, but for only a moment because he was ready for the next step.
He tugged me down the couch until his head was between my legs. His tongue on my clit in seconds, he slipped two fingers inside, licking and sucking. I wrapped a leg around his neck as he works his fingers inside of me hitting just the right spot, I threw my head back blown away that I was already about to lose my shit.
He wasn’t kidding when he said he fucked like a god.
He knew I was losing control and he wasn’t stopping.
I bit my lip, concentrating on work, anything to keep my mind from letting go. I thought about old people, and prostate exams. But the sight of Carter Sterling eating me out and doing such a great job at it, I wasn’t sure about my endurance anymore.
I squeezed Carter’s shoulders as his tongue plunged in and out. He did more than talk a good game when it came to his mouth.
When there was nothing left on earth that could keep my orgasm from escaping I wriggled and squirmed getting loose. Carter wiped his mouth, rubbing the back of his neck.
“You ok?”
I was more than okay. I was ready to explode. “I want you to fuck me, I can’t stand it anymore.”
With that I tugged him back down. The warmth of his chest against mine made the moment even more real and even more welcomed. Carter was like n
othing I ever expected.
He slipped a condom from the pocket of his jeans and fidgeted with the wrapper. And just when I thought I couldn’t take anymore and that my patience had run its course he grabbed hold of my thighs.
And then he stopped.
“What?” I said, sliding a hand through my hair. I wasn’t sure if it was medically possible to give a woman blue balls but I was closing in on something similar.
He tapped my leg. “I’m not fucking you on my couch.”
“Why not?” I watched him sit up, and untangle his jeans from his legs and tossed them on the floor.
“Because that’s boring, and I want the first time I’m inside you to be mind blowing,” he said.
Oh dear sweet god, I wasn’t sure my legs could withstand moving to any other location in his apartment. But I did my best, and let him pull me from the sofa, lost in a fog.
I gripped his tattooed bicep slinking across the room wiggling free of my clothes on the way. We were both naked and ready, and as I turned around I noticed just how ready Carter was.
He stroked himself, a slow smile forming on the lips that were just between my legs, and he walked over to me, closing the distance.
From the way he looked at me I figured he was about to kiss me, but instead he spun me around and pressed himself against me. His lips sending chills up my spine as he laid kiss after kiss on my skin.
“I think this is a form of torture,” I breathe.
“Of the best kind,” he said slapping my ass.
He lifted me up and carried me into his kitchen, knocking down the pizza boxes and toaster in the process and the fact that he didn’t care made everything happening even hotter.
And he took me from behind; with no warning he plunged deep inside me, bending me over his counter. I twisted and wiggled, working against him, sliding up and down his dick like it’s the last one on earth. Like I am doing a special dance, a sex fueled dance that is about to pay off big with me having the best orgasm of my entire life.
“I like how you’re working your hips,” he whispered in my ear, pumping even faster to keep up with me.
I moaned even louder when his hand wrapped around my hair, and the other one slipped between my legs playing with me. I grinded against him for the last chance to make him go before me and just when I was about to lose it he stopped and pulled out. He snapped the condom off and tossed it in his sink.
He guided me to my knees. And before I knew what was happening I was taking all of him in my mouth. I work hard on Carter, my only goal making him cum. It wasn’t anything I was used to; I was turned on at the thought of him finishing in my mouth.
He grabbed a hold of my shoulders. “Alright.” I stood up, and he bent me over his counter again, and in seconds he was inside me.
I matched every thrust he made, working my hips, his hands on my waist; he took over pulling and pushing me against him. He tightened his grip, biting down on my shoulder and pounded me harder.
Just when I thought he was about to cum he stopped long enough to get me on the floor. He tackled me like a linebacker, a sexy linebacker and coaxed me on top. And I obliged, happy to have my hands all over him, happy to watch him watch me as I fucked him to completion, because even if he was fighting the inevitable I was determined to make him or die trying.
“You’re not going to win,” he said, jaw tense, he was focused and I didn’t know why. I kept riding him like a horse to the finish line.
“I beg to differ,” I said, breathless hardly able to produce the words, my legs starting to burn from the cardio. What a way to workout.
Carter shook his head, closing his eyes and threw his head back. “It’s not going to happen.”
I slow my pace, pressing into his chest with my palms. “What are you talking about?”
Carter licked his lips, running a hand across my stomach. “I never give in that easily.”
I moved faster, enjoying the glorious joy of seeing him start to crumble.
“It’s mental, I don’t know what it is,” he avoided my gaze.
I stopped. “Sit up.”
“What?” He asked. “I told you.”
I wagged a finger at him until he was inches away from my face. I smoothed his hair, running my fingers against his jawline, enjoying the feel of his five o’clock shadow against my fingertips. And I kissed him, a slow kiss that deepened until I could feel Carter’s fingers squeezing my flesh, he pulled me closer.
I started moving again, this time he was more relaxed and our lip lock never ended. A few more jerks of the hips and he let out a glorious groan.
Everything slowed; I pressed my head into the space between his shoulders, pressing my lips into his neck. I stroked his hair. “Never say never, Carter.”
He smiled, out of breath, and dropped back on the carpet. “Holy fuck.”
I admired his relief, the same relief I had when I learned to let go.
There was a knock on his door. We both looked at each other not saying a word. Carter pressed a finger to my lips. “Who is it?”
There was a silence before Ana answered. “It’s me. What are you doing?”
Carter traced a few fingers through my hair, moving my hair out of my eyes. “I was sleeping. Hold on.” He drew me in, his lips on mine.
“Where am I going to go?” I asked, touching my mouth. The thought of lying in the middle of his floor kissing him sounded fantastic but Ana was right outside.
“I’m not done with you,” he said. “Let me try to get rid of her.”
Another knock on his door. He stood up, and hopped into his jeans. I found my clothes. “I can go. It’s obviously not a good time.”
Carter furrowed his eyebrows. “Are you kidding me?”
I sighed, slipping my top over my head. “She’s outside. Either you open the door and let her know what is going on or you find a way for me to leave without her seeing me.”
Carter clenched his jaw and swatted the air in annoyance. “I can’t win with you.”
I bit my tongue, I wanted to scream but I knew that was a bad idea. I kept calm and stayed quiet. “Or let me tell her.”
He gaze flicked upward. “Let’s not go there again.”
I crossed my arms. “Fine.”
“Give me a second,” Carter shouted, I headed down the only hallway in his apartment and found his bedroom. I sat down on his bed listening to his door open and shut.
He would come up with some stupid excuse as to why he was slow in answering the door. And she would believe it.
I touched my lips, remembering the kiss, remembering it all. It was a moment like no other.
It was only a few minutes before he came back.
“She’s gone,” he said in his doorway.
I stood. “Okay. I’ll get going then.”
He raked a hand through his hair, scratching at his neck. “What do you want me to do, Morgan?”
“I want you to let me tell her what I know,” I said. “And I want you to admit that there is something more between us than just attraction. Because I’m not afraid to admit it.”
There was something going on between us. And I felt it now more than ever.
Carter rubbed at his ear. “I have nothing to admit.”
I backed up, right into his dresser. “None of this meant anything. This was just sex to you?”
He nodded, refusing to look at me.
I stared at him, raising an eyebrow. “How fucking convenient.”
“I’ve wanted one thing in my life,” he said. “To reach my goal and not feel like a waste of space. And you’re set on ruining that, for what?”
I opened my mouth at a loss for words.
“For simple fucking gratification, Morgan, I have wanted something better for me my entire life, so if you think it’s worth it, then go right ahead. But you’re not winning me over in the process. Because whatever you think is going on right here, it’s not.”
Talk about a punch to the soul. I couldn’t look at him.
&n
bsp; “This false feeling of love or whatever you want to call it, it’s not real and I don’t feel it, I’ve never felt that way about anyone.”
I ran a hand through my hair, and looked away. “I think your lying. I think it meant something and you’re too scared to admit it, for whatever reason. So you had a messed up life, that doesn’t mean you run from everything.”
I wanted to hear him admit it. Admit that there was something going on between us and that he felt it just like I did. That even though we both tried to deny it we were drawn to each other. I admitted it, and I would admit it again and again.
He clenched his jaw, throwing his hands up, refusing to answer me.
“I’m leaving,” I informed him. “And just so you know you are right, you are an asshole.”
Carter sighed. “I told you this. Why are you acting surprised now?”
I glared at him, hands on my hips. “Sorry, I had a moment of stupidity. It’s long gone.”
He shook his head, I didn’t get it. “I know one thing about life. I know one day I will get where I need to be. I can land this job and things will take off for me. Love doesn’t get you anywhere, love gets you shit.”
I rolled my eyes, tugging at my hair. “That’s the stupidest thing I have ever heard.”
“My career, my goals, they will always be here for me, you won’t. That’s the difference. So take your storybook romance and throw it to the fucking wayside before it ruins your life, Morgan.”
Chapter twenty-two
“Chug, chug, chug!” The entire bar said, pushing me to finish my beer.
I slammed my giant mug on the bar and wiped my mouth. “Keep them coming, Sam.” Sam was the bartender, and also on my favorites list because he was plying my crushed heart with a bounty of beer.
Carter and Eric were becoming nothing but a blur the more I drink.
Abbi was my partner in crime and happily sitting beside me enjoying our drink fest. She was battling depression over her own husband’s demise and she was happy to accompany me out.
“This is way better than staying at home watching old home movies,” she admitted.
“Yeah, or sitting at home wishing men weren’t such complete assholes.” I hiccupped.