“Are you going to be here later or are you working late again?” She puts a hand on my shoulder and squeezes.
“I’m sorry honey, I need to be at the studio. It’s almost all completed and with the amount of money I’m being paid for it, I think I’ll take a break for a few weeks when its all done. We can spend some real time together. I never would have said yes to it if I realised that it would have taken up so much of my time.” I notice she looks tired and I like the sound of spending some time with her.
“No problem, it’s fine. Honestly, but yeah I would like that. When you’re finished. Don’t rush it, we have plenty of time to do stuff.” I keep thinking about what a big change for me it is to live here. I keep forgetting that it’s a big change for her too. However now I have the issue that she won’t be home after school and I really don’t want to be here on my own antmore.
A knock on the front door brings me out of my thoughts and aunt Sara goes to answer it while I clear away the table of all the breakfast things. She walks back laughing, being utterly charmed by whoever was at the door. I’m not surprised to see Chris walking in behind her.
“Hey.” I say quickly over my shoulder as I finish clearing up.
“Morning gorgeous” He walks over to me and places a kiss on top of my head. Aunt Sara catches my eye and winks at me then quietly slips out of the kitchen.
“So looks like you have another woman falling at your feet.” I say with a smile. He just shrugs his shoulders and smiles back.
“What can I say? When you’ve got it, you’ve just got it. I can’t help it. Women just can’t resist me.” He says smugly leaning back against the kitchen worktop, looking as relaxed as ever.
“Whatever you say Casanova. Come on. Lets go to school.” I reach out to take his hand and pull him towards the door, shouting goodbyes to aunt Sara on the way.
“So do you want to do something after school? Grab some food or a movie or....”
I finish my sentence early because he is just sat in the car smirking at me.
“What?” I ask. He starts to wiggle his eyebrows up and down in a cheeky way
“Like a date? Are you asking me out?” Oh..., I didn’t think about how it would sound when I asked him. I just didn’t want to be on my own.
“No, not like a date. Maybe just good friends? Is that ok?” Please say its ok. I don’t think I can lose Chris from my life right now too.
“That’s great with me. I say food and then movie. Maybe grab some of the other guys to come to if you want?” This is why I like him so much, he always knows the exact right thing to say to make me feel more at ease.
“I like the sound of that. I’ll ask Amber when I see her later.” We pull into the car park and he gently puts a hand on my arm to stop me.
“One condition on others coming with us tonight....” I raise my eyebrows in a questioning manner.
“You ride with me in my car, and I take you home.” He has an intense look in his eye and it makes me think back to the day he had the fight with Logan and he told me he wanted to spend more time with me. I’m good with spending time with him and I’m good with the conditions so I just smile.
“That’s fine. I would have asked for a lift anyway. Come on, better not be late.”
The day passes by without any major incidents. Just queen bitch Tara giving me the evil eye all day. I can cope with that though. What I can’t cope with is the fact I can’t help but notice that Logan’s not here, and I can’t stop my mind from thinking about him.
I’m sat in the last class of the day and I’m actually looking forward to doing something this evening. I have plans with friends. Chris is going to take me home first so I can get freshened up and change then we are going to his place and then to Joe’s pizza and a movie. As the bell sounds I quickly rush out of my seat to take the books I don’t need to my locker. There’s no point in taking them home, I don’t plan on doing any homework tonight.
I put the combination into the dial on my locker to open it and go to put my books in, but they never make it. Instead they end up on the floor and I’m stood like an idiot just staring into my locker. Inside there is a white flower and a folded piece of paper. I can hear Amber talking and laughing as she walks towards me and it brings me to focus and I quickly pick up my books, glad that no body was really paying me any attention and no one has witnessed me dropping my books. I shove the flower and note in my bag, not caring if I crush either of them, and put my books in the locker just as Amber gets to me.
“Hey so you sure you don’t want me to take you tonight? I don’t mind.” She asks with a friendly smile that I try my best to return. She looks at me a little harder and frowns.
“Are you alright? You look a little bit like you’re about to pass out” She puts a hand on my shoulder making me jump slightly then places the back of her hand my brow to check my temperature. I gently push her hand away and give a small laugh.
“Yeah I’m fine. I didn’t really eat enough at lunch. I was saving space for pizza later. No need to worry and yeah I already told Chris I would go with him. Thanks though.”
“No problem, See you later. I’ll be making sure you eat lots young lady!” she jokes.
“Ok mom” I joke back, then frown slightly when I realise what I called her. I know I was only joking but it sounds strange to just say it so easily. She walks away with a wave of her hand and I stay rooted by my locker. My hand is itching to grab the note and read it but I’m also petrified to do so. I wait until I know she won’t come back and take the note slowly out of my bag.
‘Princess, You look beautiful first thing in the morning. Green really is your colour. I’ll be seeing you soon. Don’t forget what I told you. x’
I sag back against the locker hoping it will help to hold me up. I actually think I’m going to be sick. I put a shaky hand up to my mouth just in case and take a few moments to catch my breath. I was wearing my green pyjamas to bed last night. He must have still been in the yard this morning when I went out and discovered the flowers. Maybe the grey wolf isn’t wild, and it belongs to him?
I fold the note up and tuck it inside my notebook next to the first one. With un stable legs I make my way to Chris’ car, to my new safe place and as I pass the rubbish bin I dump the flower in it.
This person knows where I live, where I go to school, which locker is mine, my combination. Does that mean it’s someone from school? They must have been watching me here.
Who would do something like this? Would Logan do this? He’s the only person I know that acted in any way possessive of me. He started on Chris just because he had his arm on me. In my heart, I hope it wouldn’t be him; but the honest answer is that I really don’t know.
That’s the problem; I thought I knew what Logan was like. The truth is, I don’t know Logan at all.
I walked out to Chris’ car, constantly looking around me. I didn’t feel safe. School and home were those places where people were meant to feel safe, but I didn’t. I didn’t know if it was just a kid that was pulling a prank on the new girl, or something more sinister.
I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Chris waiting outside his car for me. He was chatting to some other teammates, they had a game soon and that seemed to be all the boys talked about at the moment.
“Hey gorgeous” He welcomed me with open arms and I willingly let him embrace me. He plants a kiss on the top of my head, which he seems to just do every time we say hello or goodbye. Like it’s just our thing now. He finishes his conversation and we get into his car.
“You ok? You seem a little quiet” He questions me, so I paste a smile on my face and nod my head.
“Yeah, I’m good, just thinking about what to get changed into.” He raises his eyebrows at me like he doesn’t quite believe me, but doesn’t push any further.
“So I was thinking shall I just drop you off and go get ready and come back for you or...” I don’t give him chance to finish before I interrupt him more sternly than I meant to.
> “No. No, stay with me and then we can just go to your house together. I wont be long. I’ll be super quick. I promise.” I don’t want to sound needy but at this point I’ll say anything. I don’t want to be on my own. He just chuckles at me though.
“Okay, that’s fine. Take as much time as you need. I don’t mind.” He says with a smile on his face and a wink.
I reach over and squeeze his hand on the gear lever.
“Thank you” I say and slowly pull my hand back to my lap.
A couple of hours later we park outside of Joe’s Pizza Place and make our way inside to meet everyone else. Chris opens the door for me like a gentleman and places his hand on the small of my back and ushers me inside.
As soon as my feet pass through the doorway I feel it. I feel him. My body knows exactly where he is the room.
Logan.
My eyes land on him to find he is already looking at me. My feet have stopped moving and I’m just stood staring at him. Chris moves his hand and pulls me closer to him and in the direction of our table. I don’t need to be closer to Logan to see that he looks furious. I’m guessing my being with Chris has something to do with that, but after what happened yesterday he has no say over anything that I do. Logan moves like he is about to stand up, but he doesn’t. Someone stops him.
She stops him.
With a simple touch to his arm by a girl I have never seen before, he looks down and sits back in his seat. Unconsciously I push myself even closer to Chris and carry on walking to our table.
I really try to join in with the conversation and laughter on the table and to most of everyone around the table I’m doing a great job. I can tell Amber knows something is wrong. I would probably say she knows its something to do with Logan too, because she keeps looking over to where he is sat with the other girl and then back to me.
Chris is picking up on something too but doesn’t say anything. He just carries on talking to everyone while relaxing back in his chair with his arm draped across the back of mine, casually playing with my hair. Occasionally I see him looking at me trying to work out what’s going on in my head when he thinks I won’t notice.
All I can think about is that yesterday morning Logan was kissing me, claiming I was his, and now less than forty-eight hours later he is sat having a romantic meal with another girl. She must her. The one he told me about. The girl his dad wants him to marry. Well she is welcome to him. She can have him and hopefully in time, these tingles in my body will stop. I can feel it now. The pull in my body. It’s like I’m a magnet and he is a piece of metal and I’m being pulled to him. It’s exhausting to constantly fight with my own body. I need a break from it and from all the noise around me and excuse myself to go to the bathroom.
When I exit the bathroom I know he is there. I can tell by the way my body feels that he is closer. My only other way out is back the way I came and there’s no exit that way. I’m going to have to go past him. I hold my head up high and turn the corner knowing exactly who’s waiting for me. I attempt to just walk straight past him but he steps in front of me blocking my path. I stop walking and he takes a step closer to me and gently takes a handful of my hair and runs his fingers through it. He takes another small step and closes the distance between us and puts his hand at the nape of my neck and inhales deeply.
“Alexia” He says softly. I take a step back and break the contact between us.
“Please move out of my way Logan. Go back to your date.” I say trying to sound as strong as I can. He moves his arms to reach out to me again but I really can’t have that. I know that my body will betray me, so I take a bigger step back.
“That’s not what that is. You don’t understand. Why did you turn up with him? I could have coped if...” He rambles on.
Really? Is he serious right now?
That could have been the best thing for him to say because it makes me angry. He can sit on a date with someone his dad wants him to marry but I cant walk into a restaurant to sit with a group of friends with Chris? I can’t believe the nerve of him.
“Who I turn up with is none of your business actually; and no I don’t understand. And you know what? I don’t want to understand. Nothing that you do and say makes any sense to me. So you do what you want and I’ll do what I want. With whom I want. Okay?” I stand up taller and attempt to push past him again, but again he stops me easily and this time he does touch me. He firmly but gently takes a hold of my arms.
“No. Not okay with me. Not at all. You just have to trust me. I’m trying here...” I can tell he is being sincere, but after what happened, I wont be with someone who is ashamed of me but will then go out on a date with someone else the next day, and seem to think it’s fine to do so.
I don’t understand why but I know that this boy has the ability to completely shatter my heart and I know I wont survive it. I need to get out now before I get myself in any deeper; and he has given me the perfect opportunity by acting the way he has. I talk over him so he can’t even finish what he was saying.
“Trying? Trying at what? I don’t trust you Logan. How can I? I don’t even know you. You say one thing then do something that contradicts it. You get angry because I walked in with a friend, yet you’re here with your... your... your fiancé. Just go back to her Logan and leave me alone. You were wrong. I’m not yours. I never was. I never will be.” I’m fighting back tears and trying to hold my self together while trying to get out of his grip that has now got suddenly tighter.
“No, she’s not her. It’s not what you think. It’s you. You just don’t understand. Just give me time. You are mine, and I’m yours. Please Alexia just...” I’m not even listening to him anymore. It hurts my heart just to even hear his voice.
“Alex. Are you ok? Chris was worried. He asked me to check on you.” Amber speaks in a firm voice but I can see that she is concerned and probably for someone looking on, our stance and tone with each other doesn’t look very good.
“She’s fine Amber. We are just talking then I’m going to take her home. Right Alexia?” Logan isn’t even looking at her as he speaks. He is just looking straight at me. Into my soul.
“I wasn’t talking to you Logan, I was asking Alex. So Alex...” I shake my head from side to side slowly, and finally manage to peel his fingers from my arms and take yet another step away from him.
“No. You’re not. I’m came here with friends and a friend is taking me home. Stay away from me Logan. Please.” I hope the words sound more convincing than they feel inside.
“Alexia?” He pleads.
“She said to leave her alone.” Amber says and comes to stand by me.
“No. Wait. Alexia, please..." He asks quietly, reaching out for me again.
“You need to leave me alone Logan.” Amber takes my hand and leads me back to the table. Leaving Logan standing there, watching us walk away.
“Thank you” I say barely above a whisper.
“No need to thank me. It's what friends are for.” She says with a squeeze of my hand before letting go and we sit in our seats.
“Hey you ok? I thought you had gotten lost or something?” Chris asks easily with a smile.
“Yeah sorry, there was a queue.” I lie. I hate how effortlessly it slips off my tongue. A loud crashing sound startles us all and we look up to the main entrance to where someone has just stormed out and slammed the door afterwards, smashing all the glass in the process. Looking through the broken door I can see Logan marching across the car park to his truck.
The chatter that had died when the glass shattered starts up again after a few seconds of stunned silence. They all know it’s Logan who has done it, I can hear them all talking, asking each other why he got so angry. What will the Coach say? Can he still play in the game if coach finds out about this. I get a few curious looks my way, but I keep my head down and don’t join in the gossip.
The girl who was sat with Logan is stood by the manager, trying to apologise I would guess. I don’t care what she does, but looking at h
er now as she is standing there, I can see that she is absolutely stunning. She has the body that any celebrity would envy. I never stood a chance against her anyway.
I feel the first tiny crack inside of me. I’m scared I will end up like the doors. In pieces. Shattered.
I thought if I got out now I could stop this.
Maybe I was too late after all.
“That guy has serious issues.” I hear someone say. Chris slides his arm around my shoulders and pulls me closer.
“Yeah he does.” Chris replies to whoever it was. But he says it so quiet I think it’s only me who hears. He places his little kiss on my head.
“You ok? I’m guessing Logan was your queue in the bathroom?” he says to me, trying to get my eye contact.
River Falls: The Wolves Page 17