Rubbed Out (A Memphis BBQ Mystery)

by Riley Adams

  Now this was something she tried harder to react to. “No,” she managed to groan. “No hospital.”

  Tim and Pink exchanged glances. Pink said, “Lulu, you had a pretty big smack to the back of your head. You might even have a concussion.”

  Lulu quickly gave them the current year and current president.

  Tim gave a relieved laugh and Pink said, “All right, well, I guess you passed that test. Maybe you don’t have a concussion.”

  Lulu was starting to feel less dizzy, which meant that her head was starting to hurt. “I just want to go home. Can y’all help get me home?”

  Tim said to Pink, “I could drive Mrs. Taylor’s car if you drive me back here to get mine afterwards.”

  Lulu said, “That’s too much trouble, y’all. Tim, you’ve had a long day on your feet at the restaurant. If Pink will drop me off at the house, then I can get a ride to Aunt Pat’s tomorrow morning from Cherry or somebody. No worries.”

  So that’s what they did. Once she stood up, she was a lot more unsteady than she thought. Good thing she wasn’t driving. Pink offered his arm to her and guided her to the police car.

  As they were driving to Lulu’s house, Pink said, “I guess you didn’t see or hear anything that would give us any clues?”

  Lulu tried to remember. Now she really couldn’t recollect anything in those few minutes even before she was hit in the head. Not that she was going to share that with Pink or else she might end up spending the night at the hospital, which was not what she wanted. “No, I don’t think I did,” she said ruefully. “I was being careful, though—I’m always careful when I leave the restaurant at night. But I’ve been making that trek for many years now and never had a problem.”

  “They didn’t take your purse,” Pink pointed out. “And you don’t have any contents of your purse missing, do you?”

  He turned on the car’s interior lights for her and Lulu made a perfunctory search of her pocketbook. She knew that she hadn’t been mugged, though. She had the strong feeling that she’d been warned. Still, she rummaged through her bag. She had the cheerful makeup bag with the powder and the pink lipstick. She had her fat wallet that was fair to bursting with quarters. She had her cell phone. A baggie of dog treats for the restaurant’s Labs. A pack of tissues, a pair of plastic sunglasses, her keys. “Everything is here,” she reported.

  It felt like there was an important detail that she was missing. But she couldn’t remember what it was.

  Lulu said, “I’m so lucky that y’all were still hanging around. Did Tim say if he got a glimpse of the person who attacked me?”

  Pink shook his head as he drove her through the dark streets. “He didn’t. He was driving out of the parking deck when he saw you lying on the ground.”

  “So it wasn’t like the attack was interrupted then,” said Lulu. Somebody must be trying to scare her. But why? Did someone think she was getting too close to the truth? It sure didn’t feel that way.

  Pink said, echoing her thoughts, “Now I know you told me tonight that you didn’t know anything. I need you to try and think back…are you certain you don’t? Because it looks like somebody thinks you do.”

  “No, now that you know about Tim, you know everything that I do,” said Lulu. “And I don’t think somebody was trying to knock me off tonight. I guess this takes Tim off the list of suspects, too.”

  “No, if somebody wanted to kill you tonight, you’d be dead. Because whoever this killer is, they’re good. I know you’re used to walking back to your car by yourself, but you need to take extra precautions until this case is wrapped up.”

  Lulu frowned. “Like what? You’re not wanting me to pack heat or anything.”

  Pink snorted. “Like you would, even if I asked you to. No, but think ahead. Try not to walk alone, be alert to your surroundings, draw attention to an attack, react quickly, and fight back hard. You know.”

  Lulu did. But she didn’t usually think that way, she had to admit.

  “I’m guessing this person wants you to back off. And I think that might be a good plan, Lulu. You’re my friend and I don’t want to lose you.”

  Lulu misted up just a little.

  “Besides,” Pink drawled, “how would I get my daily fix of ribs?” He turned to give Lulu a wink and she laughed.

  “And Lulu,” said Pink, getting serious again. “You crossed Tim off your list of suspects, but he could have been the one to whack you over the head before he conveniently discovered you. Don’t feel too safe around any body.”

  The next morning, Lulu felt every single one of her sixty-odd years. You’d think it would only be her head that hurt, but instead it seemed like she hurt all over. Falling down must have caused more bruising than she thought.

  She felt better after soaking in the tub and taking a couple of ibuprofen. The headache she’d woken up with, though, didn’t want to go away.

  Around lunch, she decided she might forget her aches and pains more if she drove over to Aunt Pat’s. At least there would be distractions there, and if she didn’t feel like waiting on tables or talking to customers in the dining room, she could sit on the porch and greet folks as they came in.

  She smiled when she walked onto the front porch at Aunt Pat’s and saw Morty, Buddy, and Big Ben there. “Exactly who I was hoping to see!” said Lulu, giving them hugs.

  Buddy peered at her. “Say, you’re looking peaked, Lulu. Are those bruises I’m seeing?”

  Lulu’s son, naturally, came out on the porch right about that time. “Mother?” asked Ben. “What happened to you?”

  Lulu sighed. On the one hand, it felt really good to have people who cared so much about her. On the other, it was tough when they hovered. And there was definitely hovering going on now.

  “I’m fine, y’all,” she said in what she hoped was a convincing voice. “I had a little incident last night, that’s all. A few bruises and a headache, but other than that, I’m fit as a fiddle.”

  Ben came closer, studying her carefully. “You’re all bruised up! What on earth happened, Mother? And—last night? You were fine when I left you at the restaurant last night. You even had a policeman with you! How could anything have happened to you last night?”

  Lulu told Ben and her friends what happened in as matter-of-fact a way as possible. If she was going to get to the bottom of this mess, it sure was going to be hard to do if Ben had her on lockdown for her own safety. “We don’t know what exactly the motivation was,” she said with what she hoped was a careless shrug. “It could have been a random act of violence. Or someone watching for an opportunity to steal something.”

  “Was anything stolen?” Ben demanded, arms crossed.

  “Well…no. But Tim was on the scene so quickly that maybe my attacker got spooked and wanted to get out of there before he was caught,” said Lulu.

  Ben, Morty, Buddy, and Big Ben looked at one another.

  Morty said slowly, “Doesn’t it seem coincidental that you’d get attacked while you’re trying to check out what’s going on with these murders?”

  “Awfully coincidental, I’d think,” said Buddy, nodding.

  “It might seem that way, but think about it,” said Lulu. “If this murderer wanted to get rid of me, don’t you think he would have? Like Pink said, this guy is good at what he does—there’s already two bodies he’s responsible for. Why wouldn’t he finish off the job?”

  “Maybe he wanted to scare you off,” said Ben. “I know he’s scaring me off. You need to stop nosing around on this case. Pink is a great cop. He’s going to figure out what’s going on and send him off to jail. I hate to think what might have happened last night. What if Tim hadn’t been there to find you?” asked Ben. “What would have happened then?”

  “Well, I don’t really know. I guess Pink might have spotted me,” said Lulu.

  “Not likely. Sounds like he was on the other side of the parking deck and only came over because Tim flagged him down,” said Ben.

  “You and Sara would have
seen me,” said Lulu, frowning.

  “No, remember, we’d already left for the night before you came out,” said Ben.

  Lulu kept frowning. “Well, then, I guess I’d have woken up on my own and gradually gotten in the car and driven myself home.”

  “With a really bad headache,” said Ben with a sigh. “Do you see where I’m going with this?”

  “Not really,” admitted Lulu.

  “Did you even have your cell phone with you?” asked Ben.

  “I surely did!” said Lulu quickly.

  “Do you have it on you now?” asked Ben.

  Lulu reached into her oversized pocketbook and pulled out the offending item. She had an active dislike for cell phones. It distressed her to see folks at Aunt Pat’s talking on their phones instead of visiting with the friends who were at the table with them. She’d never taken to the things, and barely tolerated having one in her purse.

  Ben took it and pushed the power button. It made no signs of coming to life.

  He solemnly stared at Lulu. “Mother, it appears that the battery needs to be charged.”

  “Why would it need to be charged if I don’t turn it on?”

  “Well, after a while, the battery still needs charging. And you need to keep the phone on anyway—remember that I told you that emergencies go both ways?” asked Ben.

  Lulu sighed. “I know. I meant to have it on. I guess I’m just not in the habit. And I’m not real fond of talking on the phone anyway. When I call people, I always feel like I’m interrupting them in the middle of something important.”

  “We’ve all got text plans,” said Ben. “Maybe Derrick can show you how to text. That way you’re not even talking on the phone, you’re typing on it. It doesn’t interrupt people like a phone call does. I know how you feel about interruptions.”

  “Derrick seems so busy lately,” said Lulu, feeling doubtful. “I know he’s around some, but I still don’t see him nearly as much as I used to.”

  Ben said, “Does it seem to y’all like he’s got some sort of secret? A couple of times he’s left the restaurant in a rush and wasn’t real clear where he was going or who he was hanging out with.”

  Lulu’s heart sank. “I’ve thought the same thing, but I didn’t want to say anything.”

  Morty said drily, “Know what? His secret is probably that he’s a teenager and doesn’t want adults messing about in his business. Don’t worry about it—Derrick is a great kid with a good head on his shoulders. Teenagers always are cagey when you try to nail down where they’re heading. And if he doesn’t have a chance to show you how to text on your phone, then I can show you, Lulu. I told you that I’m hip to that kind of stuff.”

  Buddy said, “Going back to what we were talking about, the whole reason you were asking questions and nosing around was that you were trying to make sure that Cherry wasn’t a suspect, isn’t that right? You wanted to clear her name, wasn’t that what Morty was telling me?” He finished off his barbeque plate.

  “That’s right,” said Lulu. “Plus the fact that I did discover the body.”

  Ben said, “I can’t imagine that anybody would take Cherry seriously as a suspect. She’s too flaky.”

  “Hey!” said a belligerent voice and Cherry opened the porch door. “Y’all are talking about me behind my back. I would too make a good murder suspect!”

  “Not really,” said Morty. “Maybe you might murder one person. I sure can’t picture you murdering two.”

  Buddy said, “She acts like she wants to murder her Johnny sometimes.” He laughed.

  “Besides, Cherry would definitely not be responsible for attacking you last night,” said Ben. “I mean—really. Do you really believe Pink will think that Cherry would lie in wait to kill you?”

  “What?” asked Cherry, wide-eyed with alarm.

  Of course they’d had to fill Cherry in. This time, at least, it was Ben telling the story with Lulu adding bits here and there. Lulu had the feeling this was a story she was going to quickly tire of telling.

  Ben wrapped up the tale. “So that’s why I was saying that I couldn’t imagine Pink would consider you a suspect, Cherry. And why Mother should stop snooping where someone obviously doesn’t like it.”

  Cherry said, “It’s going to be hard for Lulu to stop. But I can make sure I’m with her. I’m supposed to be her sidekick,” she said pointedly. “Although sometimes your mama wants to do things all by herself.”

  “It just turns out that way,” protested Lulu. “Sometimes I stumble into things when I’m alone—I don’t plan for it to happen. I sure didn’t plan on being hit over the head last night. I was minding my own business last night anyway.”

  “I think having you as a sidekick is a good plan,” said Morty. He said to Ben in a reasonable voice, “You don’t think a murderer could take on both of them, do you? This isn’t the Mafia we’re talking about. It’s somebody who got annoyed with Reuben and then needed to cover his tracks by killing someone who knew too much.”

  “I guess so,” said Ben. He still didn’t seem too tickled about it.

  A change of subject was in order. “Ben, how are things going in the kitchen? I haven’t seen you at all lately,” said Lulu.

  Ben shook his head. “It’s been completely nuts. I really need someone else to help me out. I’ve got one other cook, as you know, but splitting the work between the two of us is still making for too much work. I could use another part-time hand or even more than part-time.”

  “That’s a sign that business is doing good,” drawled Buddy. “I can think of worse problems to have.”

  Tim joined Ben on the porch. “Mrs. Taylor? I was checking in and wanted to see how you were doing.” He was carrying a grocery bag.

  “Mrs. Taylor?” Morty glanced around him in mock confusion. “I don’t see any Mrs. Taylor out here, do y’all?”

  Lulu laughed. “He’s right, Tim. Just call me Lulu, like I asked you before. Everybody else does. And I’m fine, thanks for asking. A lot more fine than I would have been if I’d woken up by myself in that parking deck.”

  Ben held out his hand and said, “Tim, I want to thank you for seeing to my mother last night. I understand that you’re the one who found her and flagged down Pink. I really appreciate it.”

  Tim colored faintly. “I’m glad that I noticed her lying there when I was leaving. I really didn’t do anything. Except—I did want to tell you, or I guess Pink, about something that I remembered after I got home last night. When I was on my way out to my car, I did notice Brody’s truck.”

  Lulu’s breath caught. “You did? I didn’t know you’d recognize Brody’s truck.”

  “Of course, I didn’t actually know Brody from when Reuben and I were hanging out, but I recognized him from all the pictures with them together—hunting and fishing trips and all. And I did see Brody getting into his truck a few times at the festival when he was setting up the booth,” said Tim.

  Morty frowned. “Wouldn’t there be tons of trucks that look the same, though? How’d you know it was his?”

  “His really stands out—it’s a mustard yellow color. If it wasn’t his truck, it sure resembled it,” said Tim.

  Could Brody have been behind her attack? Making sure she backed off with her investigating? She hated to think so. But somebody sure wanted to scare her and it had to be one of the folks who were suspects. “Thanks for letting me know, Tim. I’ll pass that info along to Pink, too, the very next time I see him.”

  Tim flushed. “Oh, speaking of Pink—he called me early today to say there was no problem with the other thing. You know. From a couple of years ago. So now I’m just going to plan on contacting the family directly and see how I can help apologize to them.” He gave a shy smile as Lulu reached over to hug him.

  “Here you are being all cryptic again, Lulu,” said Buddy with a sigh. “Sometimes I think I never know what’s going on.”

  “Join the club,” bellowed Big Ben.

  Tim cleared his throat. “Mrs.—Lulu�
�I’m glad you’re feeling better.” He reached into the grocery bag and pulled out a plate wrapped with aluminum foil. “I wasn’t sure if you’d be in today or not, but I figured something sweet might help.”

  He pulled off the foil to reveal mini cheesecakes. Lulu clapped her hands.

  “Oh, you’ve done it now!” said Ben, laughing. “Mother will have to adopt you and make you an honorary son. She might even disown me in favor of you Cheesecake is one of her favorite desserts.”

  “I think it might be my most favorite,” said Lulu. “The only problem is that usually I have to cut myself a slice off the pie, and I can’t stop myself from cutting off a huge piece. With these little mini cheesecakes, I can have a taste and then be good and put the plate back in the fridge. Like this.”

  Lulu reached out to demonstrate eating only one. The cheesecake was absolutely amazing and melted in her mouth. “Mmm,” she said. “Heavenly. Chocolate chip cheesecake!”

  Ben said, “Hey, do you mind if I have a small bite, Tim? Only a nibble, because if everybody has a bite, then there won’t be any left for Mother.” He took an experimental bite, chewing thoughtfully. “So Tim,” he said, “you mentioned that you liked baking. Do you do a lot of cooking?”

  Tim nodded, looking at Ben quizzically. “I used to. When I had more time and…well, more money, I guess.”

  “I know you’ve done a great job helping us wait on tables while you’ve been here,” said Ben. “But now I’m thinking your talents might be wasted on serving food. Want to try spending time in the kitchen with me? If it works out for both of us, maybe we can work out a cooking shift for you. For more pay, of course.”

  Tim’s face lit up. “That would be great, Mr. Taylor.”

  “There he goes again,” said Morty in a dry voice.

  “Just Ben is fine, Tim,” said Ben. He glanced at his watch. “I’ve got to run. Time to start cooking. Mother, do we have enough waiters to help out today? Can I steal Tim for a while?”

  Tim’s face was a bit panicked at his sudden drafting. Ben quickly added, “Just to do some chopping for me—stuff like that.”