Dizzy Dilemmas

by Mary Beeken

  Then he frowned. The frown turned into a growl. “Oh for the love of Zeus!”

  His companions turned to him in surprise but it was Erica who asked the obvious question.

  “What’s the matter?”

  “It’s her! The water-wielding she devil from last night. What is she doing here?”

  “Viewing the marbles, I should think,” Ross was amused at his friend’s discomposure.

  “Very amusing I’m sure!”

  “Which one is it?” Erica asked, looking at the two young women who were engrossed in what appeared to be an intense conversation halfway down the room.

  “The one with the chestnut coloured hair.”

  “They both have chestnut coloured hair so that is not helpful. Is it the one on the left or the one on the right?” Erica persisted.

  “Will you not be so obvious, Erica. Stop laughing Ross. I have no wish to attract her attention!”

  “What has happened to our calm, rational friend, Ross? Have you ever seen him so flustered? This girl must be something special do you think?” Erica could not help but tease much to Marcus’ disgust.

  “No indeed. Even when we were in imminent danger of being caught by the enemy, he remained utterly composed and yet here he is falling to pieces over a chit of a girl.” Ross joined in the teasing.

  Marcus harrumphed “Do not be fooled, my friends, by that exterior. She is more dangerous than a battalion of French soldiers, believe me. Her brother, Lord Brockton, told me something of her past exploits last night after my encounter with her. He seemed quite keen to formally introduce us, no doubt in attempt to offload her. Any sane man would jump at the chance of ridding his household of such a mayhem maker. He has probably followed us here to force the issue!”

  “That is Gideon Brockton over there isn’t it?” Erica asked, gesturing with a nod of her head to her left. “I have heard that they are a very close family so I think you are reading too much into it. Besides, they were here first and as we only decided to come ourselves less than an hour ago, it is impossible for them to have known our intentions!”

  Marcus harrumphed again.

  Erica and Marcus laughed but taking pity on their friend, Ross said. “Come on. We will head on to the Egyptian exhibit and return when the coast is clear. I know Erica wants to see the mummified cats and I want to see what they keep under those mummy bandages.”

  The Egyptian exhibits were housed at the back of the museum on the second floor and therefore to reach it one had to climb a wide, shallow staircase and traverse along a gallery of portraits of people famous for exploration and scientific endeavours. Georgiana was particularly interested in the paintings and frequently stopped to read the information attached.

  “Have you noticed how they are all men, Dizzy? Surely women are just as capable?”

  “We are not given the same opportunities in education though are we? It is assumed that our brains are too delicate to understand basic politics, let alone scientific theories or philosophical debates. Of-course you and I know that is rubbish but the fact remains, until women are seen as the intellectual equal of men and are given equal access to education, then they will not be able to compete with their male counterparts.”

  “Women make up half the population and so one should really see it as a serious waste of potential. I wonder if women will ever be able to attend university,” Georgiana said.

  “I doubt it will happen in our lifetime, if ever,” Dizzy shook her head. “If we are looking at lost potential in gently bred females, how much are we losing in not educating the lower orders of society?”

  “Just listen to us? We had better keep our voices down less we be mistaken for bluestockings!” Georgie said in a loud whisper.

  “We are closet bluestockings!” Dizzy reminded her. “But we do not want to be mistaken for revolutionaries. We would be thrown in the Tower for sure.”

  “Can you imagine Gideon’s reaction if he had two of his sisters locked up in the Tower?” Georgiana asked. “Do you think he would charge to our rescue or leave us locked up?”

  “Oh definitely locked up! He would probably barter to have Genevieve thrown in as well,” Dizzy said. “It would relieve him of a great responsibility. No more chaperoning us around, chasing off fortune hunters or warning away rakes. It would be his idea of heaven.”

  They were just in the process of moving off when Dizzy became aware of voices approaching the corner they had just come around. Thinking it was Gideon, Genevieve and Gabriel she turned to greet them and came face to face with the one person she truly wished to avoid. The incident and the man could have been ignored if it had not been for Georgiana who had, like Dizzy, been expecting to see her siblings and had started to address them.

  “We were wondering when you were going to catch us up. Oh!”

  “Were you expecting us to catch you up?” Erica asked shooting a glance at Marcus who she saw wore an ‘I told you so’ sort of expression that unfortunately also looked a bit smug and superior all at the same time which was guaranteed to set the young ladies teeth on edge!

  “Yes. I mean, no! That is to say…” Georgiana started to explain but was a bit distracted by the pain caused by her sister’s nails digging grooves into her forearm whilst the low growling next to her seemed to be escalating in volume.

  “What my sister means to say,” Dizzy jumped in a little too loudly, “is that we thought you were our companions, whom we are expecting; who we expect to join us any minute now!”

  “We left them with the marbles, you understand,” Georgie tried to clarify.

  The absurdity of the situation was beginning to tickle her sense of humour but she knew if she gave in to the laughter bubbling up, Dizzy would probably slay her with just one scorching look. The result was that her voice came out somewhere between a snort and a giggle that would have made even her dear parents think she had lost her own marbles and was in need of urgent medical care!

  Silence!

  Only for a matter of a few seconds granted but to Georgie, who was trying to hold herself together and to Dizzy, who was looking at her sister in bewilderment; it seemed to go on for an awful lot longer. The three people facing them also seemed a little befuddled but nonetheless very much amused if their frown twisted smiles were anything to go by.

  “It is always amusing in an embarrassing sort of way when one mistakes someone for an acquaintance, don’t you think?” Ross smiled. “Erica does it all the time, don’t you my love?”

  “Me!” Erica glared at him but not wishing to make the young women in front of her any more uncomfortable or that is to say, one of them for the other one seemed to be highly diverted rather than embarrassed. “Yes of-course. It happens to me and lots of other people all the time!”

  “I cannot say I am in the habit of addressing strangers, through mistaken identity, on a regular basis or indeed ever!” Marcus commented folding his arms and grinning as the water nymph squirmed before him.

  “Oh come old friend, I seem to recall you mistaking the Conte de Levres son for the groom,” Ross reminded him.

  “Ah but he was acting inappropriately in the stables and dressed like a groom and as I had never met him before it is hardly the same, more a case of me mistaking his position, justifiably so considering his attire, rather than his identity, wouldn’t you say?”

  “As I remember it he wasn’t dressed in much at all” Ross began to reply but Erica fearing a story unfit for maiden ears jumped in with, “well never mind that!”

  But then Dizzy was unable to restrain herself from asking “What was he doing in the stables?”

  “Never mind that either!” Erica said. “Let us just agree that it could happen, and does happen Marcus,” daring him to deny it again; “to everyone and anyone.” She looked around to make sure everyone had been silenced but before she could continue Ross jumped in.

  “She is very commanding isn’t she?” Ross asked the girls. “Can be a bit scary too when she takes charge like this.”


  “Dizzy is the same. She has the look you know! One that can freeze you at a thousand paces!” Georgiana said impulsively.

  “Georgie!”

  “Sorry! But it is true!” Georgiana apologised but felt the need to justify her comment.

  The shout of laughter that echoed around the gallery from Ross and Marcus, fortunately forestalled either Erica or Dizzy from exacting retribution for such disloyal utterances.

  “What is all this hilarity? May I remind you there are sleeping Mummies within hearing?” Gabriel and the rest of the Brockton clan, including Mrs Honey Dew, had at last caught up with the sisters.

  “There you are!” Dizzy said, visibly relieved and hoping to move on without any more to do. “Georgie and I were wondering where you were but now you are here we can go and find those slumbering Mummies.” Turning quickly to the three strangers in front of her, she hastily added with a quick curtsey for good measure. “We are so sorry to have troubled you. I hope you enjoy the rest of your visit.”

  “Glenmore, it is good to see you again so soon. I was not aware you had been introduced to my sisters.” Gideon ignored Dizzy’s attempt to escape and spoke jovially to Marcus.

  “Actually, I haven’t. They mistakenly thought we were you and began talking to us before they realised their mistake. Happens regularly or so Lady Trevellyn informs me, although I cannot recall ever doing it myself.” Marcus explained, tugging gently on his right ear whilst trying to remain straight faced.

  “Do not start that again!” Erica warned him. “Nor you!” she turned to her husband before he could say anything.

  “I would not dare to say anything, sweetheart,” he laughed, putting his hands up in mock defence.

  Gideon thought it prudent to refrain from asking what was behind the comments.

  “With your permission, then, Your Grace?” and when Glenmore nodded, he introduced his siblings in age order before adding. “And most importantly, this is Mrs Honey Dew; our cousin.”

  “We are pleased to make your acquaintance, your Grace” Mrs Honey Dew spoke for all as they curtseyed and bowed.

  Once Glenmore had made the Marquis and Marchioness of Trevellyn known to everyone, Erica asked “Your names all begin with a G and therefore I am assuming that Dizzy is not short for Desdemona or something like that?”

  “No, it is a pet name of many years standing; my Lady and I no longer answer to anything else.” Dizzy told her. “I do not think even my parents remember the name thy chose to give to me at my birth.”

  “No-one with any sense would recall it!” Gabriel snorted, “For a most mismatched…”

  “Thank you, Gabriel. I think everyone takes your meaning so there is no need to finish that sentence,” Dizzy interrupted.

  “Mismatched in what way?” Marcus was not slow in getting under his adversary’s skin by taking up on any opportunity presented by her brothers and sisters.

  “Mismatched in that it did not match!” Dizzy replied hoping to dampen any more enquiries but the Duke of Glenmore was enjoying himself hugely and was as tenacious as a small dog with an oversized bone.

  “In what way though did it not match?”

  “As in that is was mismatched. I do not think I can make it any clearer, Duke!” Dizzy had been about to use the term of address; ‘Your Grace’ as befitted his title but recognising the irony of it all at the last possible second, had bit out ‘Duke’ instead. The absurdity must have occurred to at least one of the Brockton clan for she was sure that she heard a smothered snort or two coming from the vicinity in which they stood; avid spectators.

  “Oh, I think you could be much clearer, Lady Dizzy. In fact I would go so far as to say you are being deliberately vague.”

  “How so? Mismatched is concise enough, I feel. It says everything it needs to say, quite,” she paused pondering her words. “Well; concisely!”

  Marcus leaned in towards her, arms still folded across his chest. “Perhaps you should tell us your given name. We would then be able to determine ourselves whether it is mismatched or not.”

  Dizzy knew he was hoping that having been asked directly, good manners would dictate she relinquish her name forthwith but he was to be sadly disappointed. She was no mismatch for his wiliness that was for certain.

  “On the acquaintance of less than twenty-four hours, my Lord Duke; not to mention an introduction performed a scant ten minutes ago; do you really believe you are in a position to judge a mismatch? One moreover that by its very nature is based on an understanding of my character, behaviour and actions.”

  “Time is relative, Lady Dizzy. Some people one could be acquainted with for ten years but still do not really know them whilst others one knows intimately within moments. I am confident I have the measure of you,” he smiled wolfishly.

  “First impressions are so rarely correct but in this instance I am inclined to almost agree with you, for I feel I have your measure too,” Dizzy returned.

  “Allow me to escort you into the Egyptian room then. Whilst under the watchful glare of the mummies we can allow ourselves a few extra moments in which we may both take the opportunity to ascertain whether we are indeed correct in our appraisal of the other’s character.” Straightening up, he uncrossed his arms and gestured for her to walk beside him. Dizzy hesitated a moment then looked beseechingly at her family to jump in and rescue her which of course none of them were inclined to do. Shrugging her shoulders in resignation, she stepped up beside him and together they walked purposefully on.

  Silence reigned behind them but grins were careening around the circle none the less. No-one thought it prudent to make any comments however, and so Genevieve suggested they all move along to see the exhibit. By mutual consent they ambled along at a pace much slower than that set by Marcus and Dizzy.

  “It is only a matter of time, you know,” the Duke eventually broke the silence and when Dizzy did not respond he continued. “A well placed question in the right ear will soon furnish me with your name.”

  “Perhaps so, Duke but it would also set the gossip mongers off and they would come to all the wrong conclusions and before you know it, they would be linking our names; matrimonially speaking. Is that something you are prepared to risk over a name?”

  “The thought makes me shudder!” he replied more prompt than gentlemanly.

  “And me!” Dizzy laughed.

  Marcus was surprised at how pleasant he found the sound and felt the urge to make her laugh again just as soon as may be. It was a melodic sound, almost angelic which seemed in contrast to the imp of mischief presently looking up at him.

  “One of your brothers or sisters is likely to inform me. I only need to find a worthy bribe,” he was all confidence.

  “They would not betray me so readily!”

  “Do you not think?” he asked. “Are you so sure of that? I only ask because if I had taken Gideon up on his offer to introduce us last night, he had promised to furnish me with your real name!”

  Dizzy frowned suspiciously at him. “You are just trying to divide and conquer. Gideon would not betray me!” Then she added for good measure. “He wouldn’t dare!”

  “You know him best, I am sure but as I say he gave his word as a gentleman!”

  “Bitterballens”

  “I am sorry. Did you say something? I did not quite catch what you said?” Marcus lied.

  “Nothing, I said nothing!” Dizzy also lied.”

  “Gideon and I attended university at around the same time. It was good to catch up with him last night at the ball,” he carried on, pleased to see that she was frowning quite markedly now. “Although ‘catch up’ is perhaps misleading as we did not really talk about our recent histories. It was really more of an interesting tale about one of his sisters; namely you!”

  “I am sure you are exaggerating in some misguided belief that it will affect my equilibrium but I have to warn you it will fail. Gideon witnessed our unfortunate encounter last night and was probably just trying to make you see it for what i
t was; an accident. He would have known you would be reluctant to be introduced and was therefore assured that he would not have to reveal my birth name. Something, I might add, he has not done since I was a child.” Dizzy’s smile was rather smug she knew, but honestly, the man would have to try harder if he wanted to truly cause her any real concern.

  “Yes a child of seven was you not, when your brother tripped you over and sent you sprawling among the breakfast dishes? A Dizzy Disaster I believe was the term he coined. He waxed lyrically about your childhood,” Marcus took great pleasure in informing her.

  “Is that so? It is so unlike dear Gideon to be such a loose tongue!” Dizzy’s lips barely moved as she forced the words through gritted teeth. What her oldest brother was up to she could only guess and what she guessed seriously worried her!

  She decided to find out her companion’s thoughts on the matter. “How well do you know my brother? I mean, I know you attended university around the same time but I do not recall you being a particularly close friend of his. I am sure I would have remembered if you had ever come to stay when he entertained friends over the holidays.”

  “I’m flattered,” Marcus smirked.

  “You shouldn’t be.”

  “Oh I should be! But in answer to your question, your brother was the year above me and so we were mere acquaintances; having rooms on the same corridor,” Marcus told her.

  “So what then do you make of him sharing childhood reminisces with you?” she asked.

  “He witnessed you molesting me with water and thought to perhaps pour calming oils on by explaining your tendencies towards clumsiness.” Marcus offered in way of explanation. “But I don’t know him as you do. What are your thoughts?”

  “You are probably right,” she said although she did not sound at all convinced. She decided it would be prudent not to delve too deeply into Gideon’s motives with the Duke and so upon seeing they had reached the Egyptian exhibition she changed the subject. “Here we are. I must find the mummies and before Genevieve arrives.”