Release

by Brenda Rothert

  Being filmed while working out was an odd feeling. I was conscious of my form on every rep. And I couldn’t help hoping my labored expression while deadlifting didn’t make me look like I was taking a shit.

  Dan assured me I’d get used to the camera and eventually forget it was even there. He was a short dude with a black goatee who didn’t say a whole lot.

  “That was great,” he said, approaching me as I was taking a water break. “I’m done for today.”

  “You sure? I’ve got another hour to go.”

  “Nope, I’m just gonna pack up and go. A producer will be with me next time to do some sit-down interview footage. We’ll let you know when. Sometime next week.”

  I nodded and shook his outstretched hand. “See you then, man.”

  Samara was on my mind as I went through the motions of the rest of my workout. I couldn’t stop seeing her expression as she looked at me, her hazel eyes glazed with lust. The way she’d moaned and responded to the slightest touch made me wonder if anyone had ever touched her that way before.

  Surely a woman so beautiful had at least gotten close to sex. But I wasn’t so sure. She’d jumped and given me a terrified look when I touched the bare skin of her stomach.

  I dropped the bar, done with my workout. Sweat rolled down my face in streams, and I pulled up my t-shirt to mop it dry.

  After a quick shower in the gym’s locker room, I headed for the Dugout to get lunch and watch baseball. I sat alone at the bar, waiting for my food, when I felt someone walk up beside me and pause.

  When I turned and saw Amy’s platinum blonde hair and dark pink lips, I didn’t even try to suppress my glare of annoyance.

  “Hey,” she said softly.

  “Hi.” I spoke curtly and turned away, hoping she’d take the hint.

  “Can we talk?”

  “We have nothing to talk about.”

  “Orion … we never resolved things. Look, I know—”

  “Breaking up was the resolution,” I said, hoping she heard the annoyance in my tone.

  She scoffed and inched closer to me. “Don’t you remember how upset you were when we broke up?” she said. “It’s because we were in love. You couldn’t imagine your life without me.”

  I glared at her. “It was because you were fucking Brett behind my back.”

  “But that was just a symptom of what was going on in our relationship. It wasn’t really about him. It’s too hard for me to be away from you all the time. I think if we tried again and I moved in with you, everything would be different. It would be so much better.”

  My lips parted with shock. “That’s not happening, Amy.”

  “I know I screwed up, okay? I know. How long are you going to stay pissed at me? It’s been almost six months. This is ridiculous.”

  “Yeah, it is ridiculous,” I agreed. “I’m home to see my family, not you. Just let it go, alright? Things are over with us. They’ve been over for a while.”

  Her eyes filled with tears and she looked at me. Waiting. She thought if she looked pathetic enough, I’d try to console her. Instead, I turned toward the baseball game on TV.

  “But …” Her voice broke and I sighed, realizing this had turned into a scene. “Can’t we at least be friends? I miss that. I miss hanging out with you.”

  I gave her a stern look. “No. I’m busy with other things, and we’ve already gone separate ways anyway. It needs to stay that way.”

  She blinked and tears spilled onto her cheeks. “I’m so sorry. I just missed you. I never thought you’d find out. And now … my dreams are dead. I thought we’d be together forever, but I’m gonna end up living in Henley forever now.”

  I shook my head and took a deep breath, my temper flaring. “I don’t know how many ways I can say it, Amy. We’re over. I’m trying to have lunch and watch the game here.”

  “What happened to you?” she said, her voice rising. “You used to be the nicest person I knew, but you’ve turned cold or something.”

  People were glancing at us, trying to figure out what was going on. I got up and pulled out my wallet, setting some money on the bar. Without another word, I turned and left, but Amy kept going, speaking to my retreating back.

  “I’m not giving up on us, Orion. I still love you.”

  I let the words roll off. There’d been a time when Amy could get to me, but it was long past. She’d fucked her way out of my good graces, and she was never getting back in.

  Chapter 6

  Samara

  The Henley Ice Arena was a little run down. The parking lot was full of holes and the large white building was in need a fresh coat of paint. But it was a mainstay in the community, and no one really noticed its shortfalls.

  Orion approached the bench I was sitting on outside the entrance to the arena and my breath caught. Those beautiful blue eyes, looking only at me, got me every single time.

  When he’d texted and asked me to meet him here earlier, I’d almost said no. I was still mortified about the other night. But I liked being with him so much that I hadn’t been able to bring myself to refuse.

  He wore gray sweats and a t-shirt with his team logo, the sleeves of a lightweight long-sleeve shirt covering his forearms. A black canvas bag was slung over his shoulder.

  I stood, taking a deep breath to calm my pounding heart.

  “Hey,” he said softly, cupping my cheek in his hand. “It’s so good to see you.”

  “You too. I’m sorry about the other night.”

  “You’ve got nothing to apologize for. I’m just glad you texted me back. I was worried about you.”

  He was sweet for dismissing my crazy behavior so easily. Hell, I didn’t even understand it. The other night I’d wanted him with every ounce of my being one second and been too terrified to even breathe the next. He had to be all kinds of confused.

  “I did tell you I’ve never ice skated, right?” I said. “I’m gonna be a buzzkill for you.”

  He smiled and took his hand from my face, grabbing my fingertips to lead me to a side door to the arena.

  “Never,” he said. “There’s no shame in never having done something. In fact, I find it rather appealing.”

  It was appealing that I didn’t know how to ice skate? He was probably just trying to make me feel better about it.

  He used a key from his key chain to unlock the side door, which he held open for me to step inside.

  “I started my days at five AM here in high school,” he said. “And they let me keep the key.”

  “Are we supposed to be here?”

  “Yeah, I talked to Gus, the maintenance guy. He said he might be around cleaning, but the place is empty besides that.”

  “Good, so no one will see me fall,” I said lightly.

  “I’m not gonna let you fall, Samara.”

  His words wrapped around me like a warm embrace. He was the kind of man who held others up; fiercely loyal and devoted. It was one of my favorite things about him.

  He walked through a door and I followed him into a room where the smells of feet and leather were strong.

  “What size shoe do you wear?” he asked.

  I scanned the rows of ice skates. “Eight.”

  He went into another row and pulled a pair from the shelf.

  “How’d you know exactly where they were?” I asked, impressed.

  “I worked here in high school. I spent a good eight hours a day here most days.” He arched his brows and grinned. “And lucky for me, they haven’t moved anything around since then.”

  He led me to a bench and I set to work getting the skates on while he went to a booth to put on some music. I laced up the skates slowly, apprehensive about all my weight being balanced on two narrow blades.

  The music started and Orion returned to the bench. He sat down beside me and took off his shoes, putting on long socks and a pair of black ice skates.

  “The Black Keys?” I asked, referring to the music.

  “Yes, ma’am. This is my long workout playl
ist.”

  I wrapped my arms around myself. “It’s cold in here.”

  “Well, it is an ice rink.”

  I smiled and nudged my shoulder against his. “Haha, wise guy. I just wish I would’ve brought a sweatshirt. And a scarf. And some gloves.”

  “I brought you some stuff,” he said, nodding toward his black bag. “I wasn’t gonna let you freeze.”

  “Thanks.”

  He sorted through the bag and pulled out a gray hoodie, passing it to me. “It’ll be big on you, but it’ll keep you warm.”

  I slipped on the sweatshirt, taking in its scent of his cologne. He passed me gloves and a black fleece band to put over my ears.

  “Why aren’t you bundled up?” I asked when he stood up.

  “Because I’m warmed by your presence,” he said, winking.

  “Sometimes you’re adorable.”

  “Sometimes?” He cocked a brow at me skeptically.

  “Most of the time,” I conceded.

  He reached for both of my hands and helped me to a standing position.

  “I’m just used to the feel of a rink,” he said. “You ready?”

  I nodded, my heart racing. He turned to face me, helping me gingerly step onto the ice. When I got there, he steadied me with his hands around my waist.

  “Put your hands on my arms,” he said. “Hold on beneath my biceps.”

  I clutched him tightly, unnerved by the gliding sensation beneath my feet. He skated backwards, not even looking behind him. My feet faltered and his biceps hardened, flexing to keep me upright.

  “I won’t let you fall,” he said. “I’ve got you.”

  He turned effortlessly, not even needing to check and see how close the walls were. I was in awe of the way he moved so gracefully over the ice.

  “Faster?” he asked.

  “Uh …”

  He broke out in a wide grin, his single note of laughter making my stomach flip nervously.

  “Want me to carry you?” he asked.

  I arched my brows with surprise. “What, like now? Here?”

  He did something with one of his skate blades, slowing him to a stop. Time seemed to stop along with him. We stood in the center of the rink, his blue eyes locked on mine. His hands tightened on my hips and he slid closer to me. I felt his warmth and remembered the way he’d awoken something inside me the other night. He’d roused my sexual side from a very long sleep, and now it wouldn’t be denied. The throbbing between my legs was back.

  “Can I say something?” I said, my awkwardness breaking the spell between us. “I’m sorry about the other night. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

  “I pushed you further than you were comfortable with. I’m the one who’s sorry.”

  “It’s not normal to flip out over someone touching you,” I said, looking down at the ice self-consciously. “I’m twenty-seven years old. It’s embarrassing.”

  “Don’t ever feel that way with me, Samara. I like you a lot. You’re the kind of person I can open up to, and I want you to feel the same way about me.”

  His hopeful, earnest expression was killing me. I sighed and glanced over at the empty blue bleachers.

  “There are things I don’t want you to know about me,” I said softly. “Things I don’t want anyone to know.”

  There was a pause before he spoke. “Okay. I respect that.”

  “Can we skate?” I asked. “I’m getting cold.”

  “Yeah.” His hands encircled my waist again and he slid back into motion. The music coming from the speakers and the swishing of our skate blades on the ice were the only sounds in the cavernous arena.

  I liked ice skating, probably because I didn’t have to worry about falling. It almost seemed cathartic, circling the arena and letting my legs do all the work. My mind was free to be lazy here, unlike when I was reading or working.

  “What did you ever see in Amy?” I asked Orion on impulse. It wasn’t so much that I cared, but that I wondered if I unknowingly had something in common with that ice queen.

  A slight smile tugged at the corners of his lips. “Fuck if I know.” He sighed. “I guess, if I’m being honest, she just made the whole thing very easy for me. I’ve never liked being single. And the women I meet through work aren’t really interested in me. It’s the job and the money they like. I figured since we’d gone to school together that Amy liked the real me.”

  “But she’s so awful.”

  “Tell me about it. I didn’t know the extent of her catty side when we were together.”

  I loosened my grip on his arms a little as he finished turning at the end of the rink.

  “How does it feel, being back here again?” I asked. “When she’s still here? Does it bother you?”

  His expression fell. “Yeah. I don’t like it. Mom and Liv needed me here or there’s no way I would’ve come. But truthfully … it’s not easy showing my face around here.”

  I scrunched my face in confusion. “Why? You didn’t do anything wrong. She did.”

  He sighed deeply. “It’s humiliating. She was cheating on me for two months. Everyone knew. My friend Casey tried to tell me several times, but I didn’t want to hear it. I’m too damned trusting, and when Amy said it was malicious gossip, I believed her. It took Liv telling me she saw them making out at the Dugout for me to believe it.”

  “She’s the one who ought to be embarrassed, not you.”

  He shrugged and looked away. “You wanna know the worst part?”

  My heart sped up. Was he about to tell me he still had feelings for her?

  “What?” I asked in a tiny voice.

  “I didn’t even learn my lesson. My teammates made it their mission to turn me into a guy who doesn’t give a shit, but I just couldn’t do it. I don’t have casual sex. And I’m not one of those people who says I’m better off alone, either. My parents had thirty-four great years together. That’s what I want.”

  He pulled me in a little closer, and I slid my hands up further on his arms. He had biceps of steel. I had a strong, sudden urge to feel these muscles skin to skin, without his shirt keeping me from the warmth of him.

  “I think it’s good that she didn’t kill your dreams,” I said. “She doesn’t deserve it.”

  He let his skates slow to a stop as they lost momentum. I wasn’t sure if I lunged or he pulled – maybe both. All I knew was that he tasted like cinnamon and I couldn’t get enough of him. His mouth was warm and sweet, his tongue equal parts tease and relief.

  “Is this okay?” he asked, breathless as he pulled away.

  “Yes.” I grabbed two fistfuls of his shirt and pulled his mouth back to mine. When he wrapped me into his arms and our bodies molded together, his desire was evident. He wanted me. And damn, did I want him back.

  We kissed and skated – with a lot more kissing than skating happening – for a couple more hours. And as we walked out, I couldn’t keep the goofy grin from my face. Because even though I was in an ice rink, I was warm all over.

  Orion

  I’d just pulled into the library parking lot when I pushed a button to pick up a call on my Bluetooth.

  “Niko,” I said, grinning. “You back from Russia? Did Sadie come to her senses and ditch your ass at the altar?”

  “Hey, asshole. The wedding was great. Thanks again for not coming.”

  “You said it was small and intimate,” I protested. “For your immediate family. You know I would’ve been there if you’d asked me to.”

  “I’m just bustin’ your balls. It was good. We didn’t think we’d get to spend much time sightseeing but we ended up staying an extra few days.”

  “So you’re Niko Alexander now?” I quipped, using his new wife’s maiden name.

  “You’re in fine form today, motherfucker. Have all the months of abstinence made you a cranky bitch or what?”

  “It’s cleared my mind,” I said. “Like one of those nasty cleanses but I didn’t have to shit my guts out.”

  Niko scoffed into the phone
. “I’d rather shit my guts out than give up sex any day.”

  “Yeah, me too. Don’t get me wrong, the dry spell sucks. I am kinda seeing someone here, though.”

  There was a beat of silence before he spoke. “If you’re seeing Amy again, I’m gonna beat your ass so fucking hard—”

  “No,” I said, cutting him off. “You know I’m over that.”

  “Okay, good. That’s good. You should have some fun in the offseason. That’s actually why I’m calling.”

  “What’s up?”

  “Me and Sadie are doing a week at a beach house in Mexico in a couple weeks. Luke and Dell are coming too. It’s kind of a spur of the moment thing. Two of Sadie and Dell’s college friends are coming, and they’re both single.”

  “Oh yeah?” I tried to sound interested, though I was staring at the front door of the library thinking about Samara.

  “Yeah. Come with us.”

  I took a deep breath and tried to think of the best way to refuse him. Niko was a stubborn asshole who’d made it his mission to get me to jump into bed with a woman – any woman – besides Amy.

  “Thanks man, but I really can’t,” I said.

  “Bullshit. You can.”

  “No, I’m busy here. I’m helping with my niece and nephew.”

  “You can get away for a few days, can’t you? Just hire a babysitter.”

  I smiled at his persistence. “Yeah, it’s not just that. I like this girl I’m seeing. I’d rather stay here.”

  “You finally bust out that condom?” he asked, amused.

  He was referring to the condom I’d had in my wallet since before Amy and I broke up. He’d swiped it one day in the locker room and drawn a big ‘x’ on it in magic marker. Now his main source of entertainment was checking for the ‘x’ to see if I’d used the condom yet.

  “Unlike you, I don’t run my mouth about the woman I’m with,” I said defensively.

  “So no.”

  “Fuck you.”

  “Relax, man. If you like her, I’m happy for you. Bring her to Mexico if you want.”

  I thought about Samara’s refusal to wear a swimsuit at the pool. She wouldn’t feel comfortable on a trip to Mexico in July wearing jeans.