Dear Neighbor

by River Laurent

  I woke up on Saturday morning and felt pleased with myself. I had survived a whole working week and to be honest, it had not been too difficult. My work performance had not suffered either. In fact, Tracee had complimented me on one of my reports. In my mind, Josh had already become history.

  Dressing in a white sweater, white jeans, and a dainty pair of pink butterfly sandals, I set off for the bakery around the corner from me.

  “I’ll have that coffee cake, please,” I said, pointing to the last cake in the glass case. Thank God, I’d come in when I did because at least fifteen people had come up behind me to join the queue. No way would the bakery’s legendary coffee not been snapped up by the time the line cleared up, not on a Saturday morning, anyway. I’d be the heroine of our brunch at Megan’s.

  I watched the girl behind the counter carefully put the cake into their distinctive purple box. A couple of moist, golden brown crumbs that were stuck to the utensil she used to move the cake dropped to the counter and lay there. Seductively. As if they were daring me to lick them off. This was cake porn at its finest. The girl, who was obviously a monster, wiped the lovely crumbs off with a dishcloth.

  I transferred my lust to the cake in the box. It looked so good for a whole second I considered taking it home and having it all for myself. It would be worth the hours of toil at the gym as penance, not to mention Megan’s disappointment. I watched the woman close the box and tie a purple ribbon around it.

  Just then, as though Megan had read my mind, she texted me.

  You’d better bring that coffee cake, lady. I swear I’ll come around and search your apartment for it if you tell me they’ve run out.

  Oh, well. There went that idea. I replied:

  Got the last one! You may start raising money for the statue in my honor.

  Carrying the bakery box by the ribbon, I elbowed my way to the door. Already, I was scanning the street for an available cab through the store’s plate-glass windows. On a chilly Saturday morning, it usually wasn’t easy to find one. We were in that time of year when nobody was quite used to the cooler temperatures yet and wanted to get into a warm car as quickly as possible. If we got to sixty degrees in January, on the other hand, the sidewalk would be thick with people jogging in t-shirts and shorts. Funny how that worked.

  I looked down the length of the crowded street, hoping to spot a cab when my heart started fluttering. I recognized the dark hair, square jaw, and the broad shoulders. He seemed to leap out from the sea of mere mortals he walked among.

  Oh shit!

  I had, through a carefully thought-out schedule, managed to avoid running into him at our building, but of course, I would have to meet him on the street with a million other people. Just my luck.

  Still, there was no guarantee he had noticed me. I was one of dozens of people on the sidewalk. I decided to play it off like I hadn’t noticed him as if I had way too many things on my mind to see him. Even if he was easily the most glorious thing in my line of sight. I kept walking, head held high as I scanned the street for a cab, still holding onto my coffee cake. Nobody could say my priorities weren’t intact.

  “Mimi!”

  I froze in horror. That wasn’t the voice I had expected to hear. All of a sudden, I realized Max was the least of my worries. I turned to find Josh striding toward me, an idiotic smile on his face. How could I ever have thought he was handsome? Oh, God, I actually slept with him. I needed to have my head examined.

  With him was a tall glamazon of a woman, her face half-concealed by huge designer sunglasses. Her golden hair sparkled in the sun, and her clothing screamed ‘I paid a small fortune for this’. She had one hand possessively curled round his arm. She could only be one person.

  Unless I was willing to risk jumping into traffic as both Max and my ex along with his pregnant girlfriend, closed in on me from either side, there was just nowhere to run. My brain screamed in desperation.

  “Mimi.” Josh reached me, still smiling. To my shock and surprise, Lillian was smiling as well. Broadly too, I might add.

  “Hi,” I croaked. Why was she smiling? She thought I was a slut. The text of her email was burned into my poor brain forever. I’d never forget the feeling of her hatred coming through the screen at me. Yet there she was, beaming at me.

  What if she was just trying to catch me off-guard? What if she took a swing at me? I couldn’t hit a pregnant woman. Maybe I could offer her my coffee cake as a gesture of peace. No. Not the cake.

  Josh put a hand on my arm. I told myself the burning sensation was just my imagination. The violent need to slap it off was not, though. I shook his hand off and took a step back.

  “How are you? I’ve hardly seen you around the office these last few days,” he boomed.

  Are you insane? Are you literally crazy? Either that or it was me. I had dreamed the entire, crazy situation. How else could I explain away the warm, friendly, oblivious vibes I was picking up from the two of them?

  “Listen,” he continued, smiling adoringly at Lillian before turning back to me again. “You’re one of the first to know. We got engaged and we’re having our engagement party at the St. Regis in three weeks. You’d better be there.” He laughed. “Or be square.”

  I blinked. What had I ever done to deserve this?

  For her part, Lillian grinned like a cat that got the whole tub of cream and held up her left hand. Sure enough, there was a medium-sized diamond on her wiggling ring finger.

  It was a nightmare. That was it. I was having a nightmare and in a few seconds, I’d look down and find out I wasn’t wearing clothes. And everybody would point and laugh at me.

  That had to be it. Nothing else made sense.

  I was facing my ex and the woman he’d cheated on with me, and they were both smiling and inviting me to their goddamned engagement party. Why wouldn’t I wake up already?

  I opened my mouth to speak, but another voice cut me off.

  18

  Mimi

  “We’d love to be there. Consider us a definite yes.” With that, Max snaked an arm around my waist, pulled me tight against his body, and proceeded to crush my mouth in a long and passionate kiss. My knees went weak and I couldn’t help my body from responding. Hormones were rushing around madly in my blood stream when he lifted his head and looked deep into my eyes. I stared back helplessly. After that lingering look, which I was completely unable to break, he turned to smile at Josh and Lillian.

  I dared a look at Josh, my head still reeling from Max’s sudden appearance and that kiss! I was glad for his arm around my waist, or I might have fallen to the ground. I was even quite shocked I had managed to hang on to the cake. The expression on my ex-boyfriend’s face was priceless. If I had to describe it, “speechless shock and horror” would have been what I would have gone for.

  “Uh…er…hi. Josh Williams.” He held out his hand towards Max.

  Max accepted it with a smile that reminded me of a shark. “Max Black.” He looked down at me indulgently. “Is this the Josh from work you told me about?”

  I wanted to kick him in the crotch, but I smiled, instead. “So, you do listen when I talk about work!”

  I grinned at Lillian. “I don’t know about you, but sometimes I feel like I’m talking to myself.”

  She didn’t answer. She looked like she wasn’t sure what was happening. She wasn’t alone. I was still half-sure it was all a dream and I’d wake up sweating but relieved.

  “Um, okay.” Josh looked at me, then back at Max. The wind had definitely been taken out of his sails, I noticed with satisfaction. I could hear his brain work. Was she cheating on me?

  I didn’t dare let the smile slide from my face. “I’ll see you at the office?”

  “Yeah. Okay,” he said but stood there like a dork.

  “Well then. Thanks for the invite,” I said into the awkward silence.

  “See you there or be square,” Max said for good measure. I nearly kicked him then.

  Josh shook himself out of his tranc
e and nodded. We both smiled and waved as my ex and his fiancée walked away. I managed to wait until they turned the corner before pushing Max’s arm off me, then whirling around on him.

  “Are you completely insane?” I hissed.

  “Whoa! Calm down. Don’t get your panties in a twist.”

  The cocky, arrogant SOB! “Calm down? Don’t get my panties in a twist? Who the hell do you think you are?” I bellowed.

  “You always this uptight?” His voice was mild.

  “How dare you?” I gasped. I could feel my face getting red with anger.

  “How dare I what?”

  I looked at him with frustration. “Kiss me. Invite yourself to my boss’s engagement party. Be a jerk.”

  He looked shocked, which only surprised me more. Was I supposed to be happy about that little display of his? He lifted his hands up. “Be a jerk? I was trying to help you.”

  I almost lost it. “Help me? That’s my boss. I have to work with him,” I growled.

  “You said he wasn’t your boss. He was just a manager.” He looked over his shoulder, to where Josh had already disappeared. “And he looks like a real asshole.”

  “Well, thanks for the assessment,” I said sarcastically, “but I have to coexist with him in the office.”

  “Yeah, and I just made it easier for you to do that,” he reminded. “Unless you like knowing he thinks you’re wasting away and still wishing the two of you were together.”

  “You don’t know that,” I said, rolling my eyes.

  “I don’t? What do you think that invitation was except for a way to rub it in your face? And don’t kid yourself into thinking that fiancée of his wants you at her party except to make you feel like shit. I made it so you could at least show up, but you don’t have to give her what she wants. I thought I was helping you save face,” he explained. “I guess I was wrong.”

  I realized he was right, but all he had done was complicate matters. “I wish you would have let me know you were going to do that.”

  “I didn’t know I was going to until I did. Besides,” he added with a smirk, “you were acting like you didn’t see me.”

  I tried not to look shifty. “Not true.”

  “True.” He smiled, looking down at me with laughter in his eyes. He was amused. I amused him.

  “I’m sort of in a hurry,” I said, holding up the box with the coffee cake. “I’m meeting a friend for brunch. That’s why I was a little distracted.”

  “Okay, okay. I’m not here to fight with you.” He held up his hands, backing off. “Have fun at your brunch. And be sure to let me know what time I should pick you up for the party.”

  “What?”

  “The engagement party.” He turned and started walking away.

  “Wait a minute!” I called out. “You don’t really think we’re going to that, do you?”

  “Miss a party at the St. Regis? I’ll even break out my good suit!” he called over one shoulder.

  I marched after him, grabbed his hand, and pulled him around to face me. “Not so fast, Mister. I’m not going to that stupid party. First of all, I cannot imagine anything worse than spending an evening watching my ex and his new fiancé celebrate their great love for each other. He was out of order to even think of inviting me. Second, there’s bound to be a bunch of people from work there, so I wouldn’t dare of go with a loose cannon like you. God knows what you could say or do. My job happens to be important to me.”

  “Not going would be a big mistake,” he said slowly.

  “Well, let me be the judge of that.”

  He shrugged. “Okay. It’s your life. You’re allowed to screw it up if you want to.”

  See, he didn’t need to say that last part. He just did it to piss me off. I took a deep breath. “I don’t want to sound ungrateful. So, thank you for helping me the other day, but from now on please do not help me. I do not need your help.”

  “100 bucks says you do!”

  “Excuse me?”

  He smirked and looked so damn sexy I wanted to bite him. “You heard.”

  “All right. You asked for it, buddy.”

  His expression lost that smug look. “What?”

  “Five hundred bucks says you’ll be needing my help before I need yours,” I challenged. I knew I wouldn’t need his help, but by chance, if he locked himself out of the building, needed to borrow sugar, or needed something, I could do with the money. I was lusting after a pair of shoes with a $465.00 sticker on it that I spotted in a shop window last week.

  He chuckled, a twinkle in his eyes. “You’re on.”

  “I’d like mine in fifty dollar bills, please,” I said, with a glint in my eye. I’ll show him.

  His eyebrows rose mockingly, and I pretended to laugh.

  Then he was gone, disappearing into the heavy Saturday morning crowd. And there I was, standing on the sidewalk with my heart banging, wanting him, and hating the fact that I wanted him.

  19

  Mimi

  “He did what?” Megan screamed. She was sitting beside me on the sofa, her feet tucked underneath her.

  I nodded. Thank heavens the other girls were running late, so I could run the whole terrible story past Megan in private. I sipped the Bloody Mary she’d handed me as soon as I arrived. She saw how stricken I looked and knew the very thing to make me feel better.

  “I knew he was a spineless worm, but he’s turning out to be a complete psychopath. You should be glad you’re not with him. You don’t want to be with someone like that. Are you glad it’s all over?” she demanded.

  I took a little sip my drink. It was very good, actually. “I don’t know! Jesus, it only happened on Monday!”

  Her eyes became round. “You still want that jerk?”

  “No, of course not. It’s just the way he rushed out to get engaged to her, and the way he acted just now like nothing had happened between us. It was like bizarro world. I guess it hurt me.”

  “They’re both sick. That’s the only way to describe it,” she spat. She looked at me, all expectation. “So? What did you say?”

  “I didn’t say anything,” I murmured, looking into my glass to avoid meeting her eyes. “Somebody else did the talking for me.”

  “Okay. Now you’re starting to really intrigue me. Who did the talking?”

  I laughed. “Don’t freak out, but remember Max?”

  I looked over to see her eyes get even wider and rounder than I’d ever seen them. “Your neighbor? Mr. You’re So Fucking Big?”

  I giggled. “Yeah. He saved me. I think.” I gave her the details, watching as her jaw dropped further with each detail.

  “He’s your hero,” she breathed, hands crossed over her chest.

  “Oh, spare me. Since when are you such a romantic?”

  “Since romantic things started happening in your life, Mimi Young!” She jumped up and down on the cushions, clapping her hands. Her silver bangles clashed musically.

  “It’s not romantic. It was just a coincidence that he happened to be there.”

  “You might try to sound convincing when you say things like that. I don’t even think you believe it yourself, girl.”

  “I do believe it,” I insisted firmly.

  “You don’t.” She laughed. “You forget, I’ve known you since the first day of freshman year. I remember the shy little girl sitting on the edge of her bed in our dorm room. I know all about you, including all your tells.”

  “My tells?”

  “What you do when you’re lying,” she said with a grin. “Even when you’re only lying to yourself.”

  “What do I do?” I asked, suddenly curious.

  “For one thing, you touch your ear. Left hand, left ear.”

  I dropped my hand to my lap. Megan threw her head back, laughing. “Next,” she said once she’d calmed down, “your nostrils flare out.”

  “Oh, no.” I pinched them closed.”

  “I’m just saying, you might want to think twice about spending money at the pok
er tables.”

  I sighed, chuckling in spite of myself. “All right,” I murmured since it was just the two of us and she could read me so well, anyway. “There might have been a bit of drooling going on. I might have swooned a little.”

  “A little?” I was sure she was about ready to crawl out of her skin. “He’s like a knight in shining armor. He keeps coming to your rescue.”

  “He was in the right place at the right time. He was probably chasing me down to embarrass me over Monday night, to tease me or whatever, and he overheard what was going on. I told him about Josh, remember.”

  “Right, and he spared you the embarrassment of being in that situation alone. He’s right—I bet that Lillian bitch told Josh to walk up and talk to you. I would bet anything she wanted to twist the knife in your chest.”

  “Yeah, well, the joke’s on her. I don’t know what I ever saw in him.” I shook my head mournfully. “And she’s marrying him! Shouldn’t she know better? He won’t change just because there’s a ring on his finger.”

  “Who knows? Maybe she thinks she can change him.” We both laughed, knowing that was impossible.

  “Yeah, it’s easier for her to blame me, even though I had no idea she existed until Monday.”

  “I guess she’s pregnant and desperate,” Megan conceded, jumping to her feet. Her long, loose caftan flowed, effortlessly exuding style as she moved. At least I hadn’t run into the Glamazon in my running clothes. I stood and followed her into the kitchen. It was a cramped little galley kitchen, just like mine, though hers was painted a sunny yellow to make up for the lack of windows.

  “Well, at least now you don’t need to worry about going to the party alone,” Megan opening the fridge and taking out a carton of tomato juice.

  “I’m not going to the party at all.”

  “You have to go.”

  “No, I don’t.”