Red Claw Alpha (Red Claw Rising Book 1)

by Zoey Harper

  An hour after his outburst, his mother had come into his room, perched on his bed, and told him to never allow the shifter culture around him to snuff out the good in him.

  Mom wouldn't want to see me give up. I've got to make things right.

  Colton rose and got into his truck. His heart beat in anticipation as he pulled out onto the road and headed back to Tegan's apartment.

  Yes, Colton wasn't right for Tegan. Yes, he'd already betrayed her before they began. Yes, he was a bullshit alpha who had no real power and was at the beck and call of someone else. But he was determined to turn it all around.

  "I've got to make it better. For Tegan," he vowed.

  Twenty minutes later, Colton stood outside of Tegan's apartment door and knocked gently. Getting no response, he tried the handle. When it turned, he let himself in.

  "Tegan," he called.

  The young woman was on top of her bed, curled up on her side, but she bolted upright into a sitting position when Colton shut the door.

  "Jesus!" she yelled, placing a hand over her chest. She was back in her pajamas, which Colton had found cute when he first saw them.

  On other women, they'd be childish. But he understood that Tegan probably hadn't had a lot of stuff growing up. He liked to see her have a little, even in the sparse apartment.

  I also want to give her everything she's never had.

  Colton walked toward Tegan, never taking his eyes off her. Once in front of her, he dropped to his knees, putting them at eye level. Colton knelt there and let Tegan make the first move.

  He knew what he wanted to say and do, but he was the guilty party here. He'd take any punishment she'd give him.

  Colton swallowed thickly. Tegan's eyes were void of any warmth. Usually, they'd brighten whenever he made her laugh, or opened up a little. Now there was only anger and hurt behind them. The thought of what she must be thinking made his ribs ache with pain.

  What if she turned him away?

  Colton had just found his mate. His bear wouldn't let him rest if he left her. Besides, he couldn't handle another heartbreak.

  "You left," Tegan said, her voice thick with emotion. She drew a shaky breath. "Y-you fucked me, then you left."

  Colton placed his hands on her thighs, but she brushed them off. "I didn't fuck you, Tegan. It wasn't just about sex for me. That's why I ran."

  Tegan scoffed. "Save me the 'it's not you, it's me, bullshit,’ Colton. I told you I liked you, and you sprinted out of bed so fast, it was like I'd said the most horrifying thing in the world."

  "It was the most horrifying thing in the world!" Tegan's eyes widened, and she gasped.

  Colton winced. "That came out wrong."

  "No." Tegan got up. "It seems you're finally using words that are in line with your actions. I've been reading into everything you say and do. It turns out you are who you say and act like you are."

  Colton rose and grabbed Tegan's arm. "Please. Just give me a minute to explain. I promise you this was more than just sex for me."

  Tegan snatched her hand away. "So why did you run?"

  "Because I'm fucked up." Tears filled Colton's eyes, and he blinked them away. "Jesus! You're making me want to cry. I haven't cried since my mother died. Not even when I got shot."

  Tegan's face seemed to soften. She took a step toward him, then stopped herself. She folded her arms.

  "Go on."

  Colton placed his hands on his hips and looked at the ceiling, trying to suck his tears back up. There was no reason for him to cry. He hated crying. It left a snotty mess and drained all his energy. Colton would take a migraine over a crying session any day.

  Once he was okay, he looked down at Tegan. Her eyes darted around his face. It seemed she was seeking truths, and she deserved hem.

  After making her feel used as every other man in her life had done, she'd earned the truth. No matter how heavy Colton's tongue got with the idea of spitting it out.

  "I lost my mother at twelve to a car accident."

  Tegan's eyebrows shot up. Colton smiled. "I'm giving you the truth, so I have to go back a bit."

  Tegan lowered her head in acknowledgment and shuffled her feet. Her patience was wearing thin. Colton had to give her the condensed version.

  "She was human. She used to send me to my father's clan on the weekends so I could learn more about being a shifter and how to control my bear."

  Colton smiled as he remembered his mother's face the first time he'd shown her a controlled shift, and the way she'd petted his cub's head.

  "Anyway, I had a hard time being with other shifters. I wasn't like them. I had this good inside me that wouldn't die."

  Tegan cocked her head. "Why would you want to get rid of that?"

  "Because my brother and his friends tortured me. You know what shifter life is like. It's brutal. Anyway, as my shifter instincts kicked in, I started to change. I still had some good in me, and my mother told me never to let it die.

  "I ignored her and tried to get rid of it. What shifter feels guilty after taking a life? Or making fun of a friend? So, I went hard and did everything the other boys did. I fought and brawled and vandalized, but it wouldn't budge. It's been with me ever since."

  Colton stared at the ground, then cleared his throat, revealing how stupid and weak he'd been hurt. But Tegan needed to understand it all if she was ever going to take him back.

  She had a wall a thousand feet high, and if she didn't let it down a bit, he'd lose her forever.

  "Anyway, it's that part of me that made me fall for my childhood friend, Emma. Although now that I think about it, I was infatuated. The point is, I liked her. About six months ago, we got together, but then I found out she was cheating on me with my half-brother."

  Tegan inhaled sharply. Colton looked up and saw her eyes soften.

  It's working. Go on.

  "I was so mad, I ended up in the worst fight with Ramsey. His goons were always with him, and I almost died. Then Damon stepped in and got me out of there.

  "I left the clan and established the Red Claw Rising. That's how I ended up doing bounty hunting for Patrick Hargrove and the Ebon Wolf Pack."

  Colton took a step toward Tegan. "I ran away because I got scared. What Emma did to me just about broke me. My bear was wild. He thought someone else had been taking what was ours. I brawled like never before trying to keep him steady."

  Colton shook his head. "I've always had a problem controlling him. I think it has something to do with the fact that I started shifting so late in life. Anyway, those months were hell, and sometimes I wished I'd die. I think that's why I got into so many crazy fights. I even took on a dragon, if you believe that."

  Tegan sighed. "I'm sorry you went through all of that, but you know I'd never hurt you like that."

  "It was more than that." Colton took a deep breath, then his gaze locked on Tegan's big, hazel eyes. "You told me you liked me, but your eyes said something else. I got scared of what I saw in them when my own heart resonated with those words."

  Colton took the final step toward Tegan and took her hands in his. "I know we've only known each other for a stupidly short time, and that there's so much more we need to learn about each other. But there's no denying it."

  Colton took a deep breath. "I've fallen for you, Tegan. It probably happened the day I found you in that parking lot. I was so fucking mad, for no reason. I wanted to kill those guys. Then we went out to lunch, and it was like you could see right through me.

  "I've thought about you several times each day, and even though I know I'm not right for you, I want to make this work. I think you're my mate. I want to build a life that'll make you happy."

  Colton stared at their hands, afraid to look up. If there was pity or embarrassment on Tegan's face, he didn't want to see it. He had to spit this out. If nothing else, then to let her know that what she'd shared with him had meant the world to him.

  "Sometimes I get angry and moody, especially when Patrick is around. Speaking of Patrick, I
still don't have a solid plan to get my clan out from under him. That means that I'm at his beck and call and that I'll probably end up doing things you don't like.

  "I also don't have a lot of money, but if you give me time, then one day I can give you the life you want. I know that I don't deserve—"

  The insistent pressing of Tegan's lips to his shut Colton up. He quickly wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him, picking her up. Tegan pulled away and squealed, wrapping her legs around his waist.

  Colton loved the pure sound, but he needed confirmation that she'd forgiven him. He kissed her once more before making his way to her bed. He sat down and pulled away, resting his forehead on hers.

  "Do you forgive me?"

  Tegan cupped his face and locked eyes with him. The light that he loved to see in her eyes was back, and his heart melted at the sight. Colton mentally rolled his eyes.

  Enough with the mushy shit.

  "I forgive you. You said you got freaked out. I know what that's like. I get freaked out every day. I can't blame you for that."

  Colton bounced his lap, making Tegan jiggle. He looked down at her breasts and watched them bounce too. Before he let his mind wander, he refocused.

  "So?"

  "So, what?"

  Tegan placed her arms on his shoulders and let her fingers play with the hair at the nape of his neck. The sensation was soothing, and Colton purred.

  "So, do you love me, too?"

  Tegan grinned, then nodded. Colton gawked. "You're not going to say it?"

  "I just admitted it to myself. You had an hour to process it. It feels weird saying it out loud."

  Colton rolled his eyes. "Just my fucking luck! I say I love you and don't get it back. I've never said those words before, you know. You're lucky—"

  "I love you," Tegan yelled. "I was teasing. I had to give you a taste of your own medicine."

  Colton clenched his jaw. "Devious little wolf." He picked Tegan up and flipped her onto her back, pouncing on her as soon as her shoulders hit the bed. "You're gonna pay for that."

  Tegan giggled, her face full of joy. Colton's heart swelled to think that he'd had a part in that. He vowed to build a life where that would be the expression he'd see on Tegan's face for the rest of his life.

  One thing was for sure, he wasn't about to let her go, and everything and everyone that got in his way would pay for it.

  "How am I going to pay for that?" Tegan asked, a sultry smile on her face.

  "I'm going to eat your pussy so good; your knees will turn to jelly"

  Colton grinned when he saw her jaw drop. "But I'll only do that after lunch. So, you'll have to be a good girl and wait. Trust me, Tegan. It's going to be better than anything I did to you before."

  Tegan shut her eyes and groaned. The sound was low and sexy, and Colton felt his cock harden at the way she wiggled underneath him. He could get used to this.

  "You're a monster."

  He pecked her lips before getting up and pulling her to stand with him. "Yeah, but I'm your monster."

  11

  A couple of days later, Colton lay in bed in his boxers with his hands clasped behind his head. He and Tegan had just had the most fantastic sex. For once, popular belief was right: sex did get better after a period of drought.

  Colton scoffed. One could hardly call a couple of days a drought.

  After their first time together, Tegan had admitted that she was still really sore. Not wanting to force her like every other asshole she'd dated, Colton had declared a two-day fast.

  He chuckled to himself as he remembered how Tegan's face crumpled.

  Colton had talked a good game about going down on her. He was glad he'd insisted they refrain from all sex because the intermediate time had allowed him to do some serious research.

  Tegan walked out of the bathroom, dressed in a threadbare t-shirt and nothing else. Colton licked his lips. He'd like to go down on her again.

  It wasn't so much the taste, but her reactions to his actions. Tegan twisted, bucked, and moaned like nothing he'd heard before. It was an instant turn-on, and he'd come close to having an orgasm just from her sounds.

  When he'd finally penetrated her, the sex had been incredible, and Colton had gotten his relief.

  Watching Tegan study him from the doorway of the bathroom made his cock stir.

  "You ready for round two?"

  Tegan winced. "I'm a little sore. I guess my body's still adjusting to more sex than it's ever known." Tegan gave a fake chuckle. "Sorry."

  Colton sat up and crossed his legs. "There's nothing to be sorry for. I'm just greedy. You'll get used to that."

  Tegan bent down and started picking up his clothes from where he'd thrown them. Then, to Colton's shock, she began folding them.

  "Well, maybe I can make you something to make up for the lack of sex. Right after I clear up this mess."

  Colton shot up and snatched his clothes out of Tegan's hand. He threw them across the room. "What do you think you're doing?"

  Tegan shrank back and stared at the ground.

  "Fuck." Colton ran a hand through his hair and did his best to slow down his breathing and his heartbeat. He hadn't meant to scare Tegan.

  Now that they spent so much time together, he regularly saw just how much of his behavior made Tegan uncomfortable. Colton had vowed to tone some of it down, but it was a work in progress.

  "Sorry," he said, taking a step toward Tegan. When she didn't flinch, he pulled her to him and rubbed circles on her back.

  Tegan had taught him a lot about what she liked and didn't like without saying a word. Whenever Colton rubbed her back, she melted against him and purred.

  "It's okay," she mumbled, pressing against his chest.

  "No, it's not. I scared you, and I'm sorry."

  Tegan pulled back and wrapped her arms around Colton's waist. "Why were you mad?"

  Colton sighed. "Because seeing you pick up after me, made me realize that you're treating me like you would a Bluewolf male."

  Tegan blinked repeatedly. "Excuse me?"

  "You heard me. Ever since you moved in, this hotel room has been spotless. It wasn't even that way when I first got it. And just now, you picked up after me. If I had to bet, you'd cook, too, if we had a stove."

  Tegan smiled. "I do those things because I love you."

  "Maybe some of them, but not all."

  Colton placed a finger under her chin and lifted it. "I've been studying you, Tegan Massey. It's my thing. You may not notice the things you do, but I do.

  "Yesterday, we were both tired after our hike, but you insisted on letting me shower first. When I came out, everything was back in its place. My clothes were in the laundry basket, my shoes were lined up against the wall, and the fucking bed had been turned down."

  Tegan's head dropped. "I thought it would make you happy."

  "You being happy is what makes me happy." Colton chuckled. "Why do you think I like going down on you?"

  Tegan's face colored. "So, you really liked doing that?"

  "Fuck yeah! Just now I was thinking about doing it again, and I have half a mind to. I don't need to fuck you to feel good."

  Tegan inhaled. "Wow. You're not like any guy I've ever met."

  "And don't you forget it."

  Colton backed up toward the bed and pulled Tegan onto his lap once he sat down.

  "I don't want you to do shit for me because you think that's what you should do. I'm not the type of guy that expects his woman to do things he wouldn't do. Do you know why I like things being messy?"

  Tegan shook her head and let her fingers play with the hair at the nape of his neck. He loved when she did that, but he wouldn't tell her that. She might add it to a list of dos and don'ts.

  Colton wanted them to be on equal ground. Different, but equal.

  Listen to me. I sound like a fucking feminist pamphlet.

  Colton had lied when he said he didn't know much about Gloria Steinem. When one of his exes brought up feminism,
he'd secretly gone home and read what was on a couple of websites. Surprisingly, he found that he agreed with a lot of what was on there.

  So much of shifter culture was about dominance. Smaller shifters were submissive to bigger ones.

  While Colton had taken advantage of his position on the shifter hierarchy, he did empathize with smaller shifters. Why should they be treated like dirt?

  The reading he'd done that night had opened his eyes to a lot. Most female shifters had comparable skills and strengths, but they weren't allowed to do more than work in the Gray Shade Clan's businesses.

  Security and protection was a matter for male shifters, but Colton knew for sure that, given the same training, most of those women could fight as well as he did.

  Now, looking at his mate, he could see the problem of such discrimination. Tegan couldn't protect herself. If he hadn't stepped in, those wolf shifters would have raped her.

  Colton's nostrils flared with the thought. He shook his head and refocused.

  "You got lost again," Tegan murmured.

  "I was thinking; I need to teach you to fight. I might not always be there to protect you."

  Tegan's eyes widened, and she climbed off his lap. "What are you trying to say?"

  Colton frowned. "Just that I might not always be around. Why did you freak out on me?"

  "Because you sounded like you were ready to leave me here and go back to Bolsend!"

  Colton laughed. "Never. I just wanted to give you time to get used to us before I brought it up."

  Colton reached out and pulled Tegan to him once more. She landed on his lap with a thud, and he tickled her sides.

  Tegan laughed. "So, you're not going back without me?"

  "Of course not. I'd move here, but I have responsibilities back home. I want you to come with me. I just wanted to do the right thing and ask after we'd spent a little more time together."

  Tegan smiled sheepishly. "Sorry. It just sounded like the beginning of a goodbye."

  Colton scoffed. "I'm not subtle, unless in a fight. I'll always be upfront with you. I brought up teaching you to fight so that my mind can rest. Yesterday, when you went to the restroom in that restaurant, I kept worrying about what would happen if you ran into a male wolf leaving the men's room."