Bound to the Barbarian
Page 16
‘Ashfirth.’ She was kissing him like a Fury. ‘Ashfirth.’
Every muscle trembling, Ash was on the brink. He pushed on to his elbows and levered himself out of her; it would not do to lose all control. She was kissing his shoulder when his seed spilled on to the silken sheets.
He lay there, catching his breath.
A fine sheen of sweat gleamed on both their bodies. His tongue came out, he tasted salt on her neck. He stroked the back of her head, fingers winding into her hair.
She smiled at him, her expression adorably bemused. ‘That was—’ her voice was scarcely a whisper ‘—that was perfect.’
Winded, Ash muttered agreement, he would never move again. Perfect? Perhaps, but it had been so swift and withdrawing at the last moment had almost been impossible. Whoever she was, she would not want him to father a child on her.
‘You, my lady,’ he said, catching his breath, ‘are definitely not the Princess.’
Her eyes opened wide, her smile never faltered. ‘Commander Ashfirth, you are wrong. Quite, quite wrong.’
‘I am not wrong.’ He stroked her breast, cupping it in his palm, watching as the small bud tightened. ‘You, my lady, were no virgin.’
Katerina allowed her smile to widen, her gold ring caught the light as she reached up to run an exploratory fingertip across his cheekbone. The slight roughness of his cheek fascinated her.
The urge to tell Ashfirth part of the truth, of her truth, was dangerously alluring. ‘Princesses are not always innocent when they go to their marriage beds,’ she said. ‘Sometimes—for political reasons—they are forced to surrender their virtue early.’
His brows snapped together, he was immediately on the alert. ‘You were forced? You are saying that Prince Peter forced you?’
Wishing she could snatch back the words, Katerina shook her head. No, no, what are you doing? You cannot imply that Prince Peter forced Princess Theodora, particularly when they adored each other. ‘No…no, my apologies…I did not mean…I…I should not have said that. Prince Peter did not force me.’
Ashfirth watched her. ‘You were no innocent a moment ago.’
‘No.’
‘Nor are you the Princess, I am certain of that.’
He cannot be sure, he has no proof. The Commander had not seen her signature at the slave market; neither had he seen her document of manumission—the paper that had set her free. Before they had left the slave pen, Katerina had asked Anna to put the slaves’ documents safely under lock and key.
A smile came and went on his face, those blue eyes never left her, he was waiting for her to make the smallest slip.
Not yet. I cannot confide in him yet…I may never be able to confide in him.
He was playing with her hair, weaving a strand in and out of his fingers. Her belly fluttered, her heart constricted. She liked his touch and there he lay, watching. Waiting.
I must brazen this out. Katerina longed to unburden herself, she wanted to tell him everything. Instead she had to content herself with giving him a smile that came from her heart. She rested her head against a broad shoulder.
‘Thank you, Ashfirth. That was most…enjoyable.’ In truth, Katerina was stunned—she had never experienced such pleasure in her life. When he had pushed her into this bedchamber, intent only on revealing her identity, she had set out to tempt him, to distract him from his purpose. Except that she had been the one to lose her purpose. Ashfirth, with a few gentle touches, had transported her—she would need time to recover herself.
‘You are welcome.’ His lips twisted. ‘I am happy that as a lover I meet with your approval.’
He can never know all of my truth, that I am a maidservant who was once a slave.
It was bad enough that Ashfirth Saxon, a man she had come to admire, should discover that she had been deceiving him, but for him to learn that she had herself been a slave…that she could not bear.
Katerina had lost her innocence to Vukan in the days before the Princess had bought her. No love had been involved and, on her part, little attraction. Katerina had never enjoyed relations with him. She had simply been thankful there had never been a child.
The window hangings swayed and a shaft of sunlight fell across the bed. Ashfirth had become her lover and the world was a different place. Sliding an arm about his waist, Katerina allowed herself a smile. Most enjoyable was perhaps not the best description of how she felt now. The sensations had astonished her.
From head to toe, all was bliss. It was a complete revelation. For the first time in years, she felt truly at ease with a man. With Ashfirth’s heartbeat in her ear, she felt safe. It was utter folly, their liaison was impossible, but it felt as though Ashfirth Saxon had stripped her of her past when he had stripped off her clothes. At this moment, it even seemed possible that she might learn to trust a man again.
Trust a man? What a terrifying idea! Katerina had not had such a thought since her father had sold her into slavery. Yes, Ashfirth was a skilled lover, yes, he made her body glow from head to toe, but that was no reason for her to lose her head over him.
She shifted her cheek against his chest. It was astonishing how pleasurable it could be to listen to a man’s heartbeat. Small pleasures, I can allow myself small pleasures. She had been attracted to Ashfirth from that first look through the convent grille. Initially the attraction had been superficial, but every moment spent in his company had revealed more that was likeable about him. Gradually liking had turned to admiration.
None the less, she had been unprepared for how overwhelming it was to make love with a man one admired. One touch and I was lost—what a horrifying thought. Except that with Ashfirth it is far from horrifying.
His large, gentle fingers were caressing her cheek, sliding back into her hair, tipping her head back so their lips could meet…
Gentle. He can be so gentle.
Ashfirth’s lips were warm and soft as they moved over hers. Loving. She felt herself warming inside.
Loving? She drew back with a frown. They had come together and while Ashfirth Saxon clearly had the power to transport her, she must not delude herself. This was not love. He was a man and she was a woman; the attraction between them was carnal, nothing more.
The Commander of the Varangian Guard had taken her because he no longer believed her to be the Princess. The act of love was for him yet another weapon in his armoury, a weapon he had not hesitated to use because he hoped to lure the truth out of her. At her tiniest slip, he would pounce. His hands might treat her kindly at the moment, but would they continue to do so when he discovered her low status? Commander Ashfirth, taken in by a freed slave!
Anger had prompted her father to sell her into slavery—what form would this man’s anger take?
He was smiling, leaning over her so that those finely curved lips could chase hers.
This cannot go on for ever. This may be the only time we have together…
She kept smiling as she allowed his mouth to settle over hers. He had her firmly pinned to the bed with his hands on her shoulders and she was enjoying it. Bliss, this man makes me melt…
The kiss drew out until longing was a fierce pain in Katerina’s belly. He lifted his head and gave her a smile so sweet she blinked.
‘Ashfirth?’
A strong thigh inserted itself between hers and he pressed against her, hot and hard. Ashfirth Saxon wanted her again.
‘Already?’
‘If it pleases, my lady.’
It did please. It pleased very much, because while they were…making love, Katerina could stop worrying about deceiving him and what form his anger might take when she did at last admit the truth…
Chapter Eleven
Sated, content in ways he did not care to examine, Ash pillowed his head on his hands and looked past the gently wafting curtain. Gulls were calling in the harbour below, dusk would soon be darkening the sky. He could hear the clipped commands of a sergeant changing the guard and the tramp of booted feet.
They had not left the great bed for hours, making love time after time while the sun inched its way across the mulberry sheets. He could not stay closeted in the Princess’s bedchamber for ever. Soon, he must leave.
Whoever you are, we have managed to cause a scandal between us. To have remained in this bedchamber together for so long…!
It was a wrench to drag himself back to his duties, and as Ash forced himself to do so, his sense of contentment faded.
Had General Alexios made a move? Probably not. If Alexios Komnenos had entered the city, Sigurd would have summoned him, this was the lull before the storm.
And what about Emperor Nikephoros? With luck, the Emperor might have returned to his senses, he might be an inadequate ruler, but an inadequate ruler was better than none. When Ash left these chambers, he had best be prepared for anything.
Ash glanced at the ‘princess’.
I should not have seduced her, I have learned nothing.
She had fallen asleep with his name on her lips. Half-hidden beneath one of the mulberry-coloured sheets, she was tucked against his side, a slender ankle hooked over his calf.
Ash hadn’t been able to stop himself. Not that he had tried very hard. Initially, he would swear that the passion that had flared up between them had startled her—but once it had been ignited, she had been as hungry for him as he had been for her. In the end, he had resorted to drawing a sheet over them both. As an attempt to kill the desire he felt for her, it had been utterly futile—that slight, sweet body drew him as none had ever done. He wanted her still.
Perhaps I should have resisted, but I hoped she might betray herself.
Unfortunately, she had not.
Thanks to her, Ash found himself in an untenable position. Without doubt, she was not the woman he had been ordered to bring back to the capital, but he wanted proof. At the least, he wanted her to admit what she had done. Ash gave a self-deprecating smile. The only thing that this woman had revealed was an intensely passionate nature.
Who is she?
Each time, and Ash had lost count of how many times their bodies had joined, he had been careful to ensure that he had not left his seed inside her. He had not lost control.
Who is she? It was likely she would have been chosen from the most faithful of Princess Theodora’s ladies-in-waiting. As such, she would certainly not welcome quickening with his child.
Who is she? As the light faded to violet and the shadows began to thicken, he felt his face soften as he studied her. Why did she draw him so? She was surely out of bounds for him, he should never have touched her.
What if—his skin iced over—what if she is married?
No! She was not married, she could not be married, her responses were so warm, so unfeigned. Unfeigned? Holy Virgin, what was he doing trying to justify her? The woman had deceived him, she was continuing to deceive him!
His fingers crushed the silk sheet. A trace of anger remained, confusingly mixed with what Ash recognised was concern. God’s blood, he should not feel concern for the woman, that had not been part of his plan.
Who is she?
The most loyal of Princess Theodora’s ladies? She looked heart-wrenchingly young. So small and defenceless tucked up against him. That air of unworldliness had taken him in from the start. Could it be that she was unaware of the enormity of what she had done? Of the penalties that might be imposed upon her? Banishment…torture…death.
She had mentioned the Prince of Rascia—had hinted at being forced. Frowning, Ash reached for a shining strand of hair and wound it round his finger. That simply did not fit with what Ash knew. Princess Theodora was said to have been enamoured of her prince. Was it likely that the Princess would entrust the extraordinarily challenging task of impersonating her to a woman she did not trust? To a woman who had had relations with her prince? If Prince Peter had forced this girl—no, the Princess would have to be a saint to have kept this girl in her entourage after that.
Ash stared at the sleeping face so close to his on the pillows, and sighed. She was so beautiful. Why had she mentioned being forced in that way? Again the thought came to him that the truth was there, interwoven with lies. It would be good to think that she wanted to give him the truth, and that it was loyalty to the Princess that prevented her from giving him more. Could her evasiveness be caused by more than loyalty, could fear also be part of the weave? Lord.
She had been no innocent when they had taken their joy of each other. She had been startled, pleased even, but she was definitely no innocent. It was possible that somewhere in her past someone had forced her. His chest tightened. Shaking his head, he ran his hand down a length of soft, perfumed hair. Someone had forced this girl. His jaw clenched as the thought became cold certainty. How could they? She was so delicate and fragile, so caring of those around her—the Princess, the slaves…
Who cares for her? This girl may not be the Princess, but surely she is just as deserving of protection?
Silk rustled as he shifted. Was he being taken in by a pretty face? It was possible. No one knew better than he what it was like in Imperial service, having to jump the moment word was given. Ash had seen a servant beaten to within an inch of her life, simply for dropping a glass goblet.
The Princess might have some hold over her…
A glossy strand of hair fell over her face, Ash stroked it away. For this girl to keep up the pretence once she had left the Princess’s sight, her motive must be powerful indeed.
What kind of a hold might the Princess have over her?
The jewel chest—was that her motive? The Princess must have given her those jewels, and there was more wealth in that enamelled casket than most people saw in their entire lives.
Motive enough, but not for this girl.
Pensively, Ash rubbed his face. The girl slept on. She had bought slaves today. The large Norman and the two babes. Had she sold some of the Princess’s jewels to buy them?
Why buy slaves? Some ladies bought slaves to puff up their consequence.
Not this one. In the slave market her expression had been compassionate, and she had asked Lady Anna to find a litter for the Norman.
She wants to help slaves, why? There was some connection here that he had yet to fathom. Ash grimaced. There was so much about this woman that did not fit. Hell, the only thing that fitted was the way she had come into his arms, the way they had taken pleasure in each other. In that way, they were a perfect match.
The door rattled. Someone—Lady Anna, if he guessed aright—was outside and she sounded agitated.
‘Theodora, let me in!’
Another voice, this one low and male, murmured back. Kari?
And then it was Lady Anna again. ‘They have been in there the whole afternoon—I must see her!’
Ash eased the girl’s head from his shoulder and slipped out of bed. From the rising pitch of Anna’s voice, Kari would not be able to keep her at bay much longer.
Ash scooped up his clothes and dressed quickly. As he moved towards the door, he couldn’t resist a last look at the girl curled beneath the disordered bedclothes.
If only I knew her name…
Katerina woke with a start. Someone had opened the bedchamber door, she heard a curt muttered exchange.
Then, ‘Princess!’
She jerked upright, clutching the sheet to her breasts. As the door swung shut, she saw Ashfirth striding through the reception room beyond. His leg must be getting better, his limp was barely noticeable.
‘Are you mad?’ Anna rushed over, her eyes practically starting from her head. ‘What in Heaven is going on?’
Embarrassment was a hot flare in Katerina’s cheeks. Truth to tell, the sudden flowering of intimacy been her and Ash had shocked her. It is so easy to respond to him! It is all pleasurable with Ash…and not only that—Ash makes it a pleasure to give him pleasure. However, Katerina was far from ready to admit as much, even to Anna. She lifted her shoulders as though she did not care. ‘I would have thought that was obvious.’
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Anna’s jaw dropped. ‘The C-Commander and you…?’
‘Yes, Anna, the Commander and I…’
Anna bent to pick up Katerina’s gown and veil. ‘It must be the strain,’ she muttered. ‘I told the Princess that you were not suitable to take her place. She should have sent someone with real knowledge of the Palace, someone who understood the protocols.’
‘Someone with more breeding, you mean,’ Katerina said, drily.
‘Since you care to put it like that, yes! Someone with a little more breeding would have had some idea of what is, and what is not, acceptable behaviour.’ Anna met Katerina’s gaze squarely. ‘Princess Theodora would never have invited Commander Ashfirth into her bedchamber. Or into her bed.’
‘Pass me that robe, please, Anna.’
Frowning, Anna flung the robe at her, and Katerina got out of bed. ‘Really, Katerina, you should not have done it. And so blatantly! You are quite without shame.’ There was more muttering. ‘The Princess should have sent a lady in her stead, not a peasant! I told her, I told her!’
Katerina set her teeth. The first mention of her humble background had wounded her, she had ignored it out of deference to Anna’s nobility. But that did not mean she was going to permit her to rub salt in the wound. ‘I may only be a peasant, Anna, but I am doing my best to help Princess Theodora.’
‘I hardly see that sleeping with Commander Ashfirth was called for!’
‘If you would calm down and hear me out, I would be happy to explain.’ Katerina knew that there was no explanation for the way that intimacy with Ashfirth had turned out to be so wondrous an experience, but she could at least make Anna understand what she had set out to do.
Anna put her hands on her hips. ‘I am listening, but consider this: Princess Theodora would never have slept with one of the Emperor’s Guard.’
‘The Court is renowned for many things, but you must know that a strong sense of morality is not one of them. Why, back in Rascia, I heard one of the Princess’s ladies commenting on the prowess of a lover in the Varangian Guard.’