by Jami Denise
I thought about it as I cracked some eggs in a dish. "We might as well go today. I'll ask the girls if they want to tag along."
The door swung open, flooding the cramped space with light, and Royal walked through the door.
"What are you two hens cackling about?"
He stood there, sleepy eyed and scratching his bare stomach, and he'd never looked more beautiful. He was a mess, but he was my mess.
"Good morning, sunshine!" My mother chirped. "I'm a mess over here, so come to me for sugar." She leaned out with the spatula in the other direction with her lips pursed for a kiss.
She was such an adorable dork.
"Morning, gorgeous," he said, giving her the "melt a mother's heart" smile. He kissed her twice and stole a piece of bacon off the plate.
"Now, you better watch it there, sweetheart. You're getting a little belly."
She pointed at his gut with the spatula—apparently, the prop for the morning—and raised her eyebrow. "Don't make me feed you turkey bacon, son."
I snorted and turned my head so he couldn't see me laugh.
"You calling me fat, Mom? Come on, look at me. I'm still a stud."
He winked at me, smiling. I loved their banter, and I'd missed it. We'd hardly done anything as a family in months, at least not with Royal, so watching them catch up made the sour in my stomach disappear.
"Well, you keep going on a beer gut and you won't be able to find your tallywacker."
Royal groaned and then laughed. "Jesus.”
“Mom! Seriously!"
It was amazing how she still had the ability to make me feel like a fourteen-year-old girl. I was mortified.
"I'm gonna," he said, pointing toward the bathroom.
I nodded and turned back to the stove. "Mom, I don't know what to do with you, but I love you anyway."
After breakfast, my mom, the girls, and I went into town and spent the day shopping and stocking up on things we hadn’t brought along. My mom loved the shops there, and the girls found plenty of things to keep them busy while we shopped.
Lots of boys.
It was late afternoon by the time we got back to camp, and the boys were already off the water. My dad and Royal were busy gutting fish for supper while I got Benji cleaned up for dinner. With all of us working together, it didn't take long to get dinner ready, and we all sat around the table, laughing, talking, and enjoying ourselves.
That night once everyone was ready for bed, Royal and I cleaned up and put out the fire and locked up. We worked together quietly and even though there were a thousand words to be said, it just felt better saying nothing at all.
Music trickled from the open window of the RV, and I turned to see the silhouette of my parents as they danced. It made me smile. Every night for as long as I could remember, my parents danced. It was always slow, and it was always to oldies.
I stopped and stared at them through the window. They were so much in love, and I idolized them. My dad wasn't any more romantic than Royal was, but he never, ever, forgot to dance with my mom. He never forgot to kiss her goodbye, and he always brought her lilies on her birthday.
The little things... they were the glue that held them together.
"Bow chica bow wow," Royal sang crudely from behind me.
"Shut up," I whispered loudly. "They're so cute. I love watching them."
He stepped behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, laying his head on my shoulder. "You think we'll be like them when we get that old?" he asked, rocking me slowly back and forth.
I put my hands on top of his. "I'm not sure that we're like them now," I whispered sadly.
My parents had been married for over forty years, and they were still in love and as strong as ever.
He turned me in his arms and stared at me. There was a determination raging inside of him—like hope could carry us away. The soft sound of Smokey Robinson’s voice filled the space between us and memories shuffled through our thoughts.
Memories of us, the song, the past. It was a delicate moment—one I knew could shatter any second.
His hands slid from my waist, across my back and down to my bottom. When I looked up at him, ready to give him a piece of my mind for copping a feel at a moment like that, his eyes knocked me off my feet.
Those hazel eyes, the unique marble that I'd always loved, glistened. Unshed tears swam and threatened to spill over.
"Royal?"
"Shh," he said, "you talk too much, and it screws everything up."
I opened my mouth to say something, but he squeezed my cheeks again to shut me up.
"Do you remember when your mom and dad invited me over for dinner for the first time?"
How could I forget that night? I couldn't eat or sleep for a week. My dad hated him, so his motives were shady at best asking Royal over for dinner. I was sure he was going to kill him and bury the body in the backyard. I was daddy’s girl, his little angel, and he saw Royal as a hoodlum, determined to soil his baby.
In the end, it was one of the most memorable nights we'd ever shared. It was the night my parents fell in love with Royal, and he fell in love with us. It was also the first night Royal got the privilege of watching my parents dance.
We watched from the kitchen while they danced in the middle of the living room. He held me close, swaying and humming softly in my ear. I wanted more than anything for him to dance with me that way, but for the longest time, he refused.
"I remember."
He hummed. "You remember how I said I didn't want to dance with you?"
I nodded against his chest, and he went on. “I didn’t know how to dance, but I felt like an idiot. I saw how moved you were while you watched your parents, and shit... I wanted that. Fuck, I wanted that so much. I was too proud to admit it.”
I laughed softly. "Why are you telling me this now, after all these years? You danced with me at our wedding."
He sighed and rubbed his chin over the top of my head. “Your mom taught me the night before the wedding.” He chuckled, tickled by the memory. “There we were, me, your mom, and your dad dancing in the living room.”
"My dad?"
"He said he was just there to watch my hands."
I smiled. Sounded like my dad.
"I didn't blame him. Your mom was beautiful. She made me nervous. Still does sometimes."
We swayed back and forth, not really dancing, just holding each other when he spoke again. "Why’d we stop dancing, cookie? We shouldn't have stopped." His voice was so low I barely heard him, but I was glad I did.
"I know."
Then, there was a rustling behind me, and I stilled. "Did you hear that?" he asked.
I nodded against him. "We need to get in the tent with Benji. He'll be scared to death."
"Shhh. Come on," he said, pulling me behind him toward the RV.
He went to the back and pushed me against the vehicle and pressed his finger against his lips to tell me to stay quiet.
I wasn't exactly scared—there wasn't anything predatory in the area—but it freaked me out.
"What is it?" I asked quietly.
He gave me a sharp nod toward the other side of the RV and scowled. "It's your freaking daughters sneaking around."
I gasped. I couldn’t believe they’d do something like that—especially Laney. I couldn’t see her going along with it. Macy, however, was a loose cannon lately. It was dangerous for them to be lurking around alone in the dark. They were smarter than that.
"Wait right here."
The whispers and giggles were getting closer, and once their footsteps were past us, Royal took my hand and dragged me down the dark path behind them. When we got closer, he told me to wait and took off after them.
"Jenna!" Abbie yelled, running up behind me. “Where’s your stupid husband?”
She sounded frantic and my heart leapt out of my chest. “What’s wrong? He’s following the girls!”
She leaned down in front of me with her hands against her thighs and tried to catch
her breath. She shook her head twice, lifted one hand, and held the phone up in front of me.
“Swear to God, I’m going to kill him.”
I gave her a confused look and turned to look for Royal. I wasn’t sure what the girls were up to, but if it involved boys, he would go ballistic. Without me there to calm him down, no telling what he’d do.
“Come on. Royal is going to kill someone if boys are with them—which I would bet my left tit there’s boys."
We’d only walked a few feet before they were coming out of the trees, each one of them looking more than pissed.
"I swear; you guys act like we're twelve! We were just going to the bathrooms!” Macy said. Snotty attitude, snarling lips and all.
"Look, you need to watch your mouth. You've been nasty for weeks, and I'm sick of it. What's gotten in to you?"
She stomped off, crying and cursing Royal and me, and climbed back in the tent.
"Laney, you better get your ass in that tent with your sisters. I’ll talk to you girls tomorrow.”
"You thought it'd be a good idea for them to sneak off with boys, Abbie?" Royal snapped when he approached us.
He was out of breath from running, and if the circumstances were different, I would’ve razzed him about being out of shape. He was in no mood for jokes, so I let that one go.
"For your information, dickhead, I didn't let them sneak off. You think I'm an amateur? They were going to the bathroom! You know, that brick building over there, in the direction they were walking? I’ve been in the tent with them all night. We were playing Uno, and I told them to take a piss before we went lights out!”
She glared at him and he glared right back.
“The reason I walked away was to get reception on my phone. I have four voicemails from your friend, so if you want to get pissy with someone, you can blame her. And tell her not to call my phone anymore.”
I tilted my head and looked at Royal, waiting for a good reason why she'd call. "What in the hell?"
"I don't know why she's calling!"
Abbie clucked her tongue and shook her head. "She said she'd been calling your phone for hours and you wouldn’t answer. Since the business phone is forwarded to mine, I got the call. At eleven at night. On vacation.”
"Jesus," Royal groaned. "This is a nightmare."
I huffed. A nightmare was putting it mildly. “Why is she calling you? I'm getting really fed up, Royal. You’re on vacation with your family."
"She’s a client now, Jenna. She hired me to redo her patio and landscape the front yard. She’s impatient, that’s all.”
"It's true, Jenna. I thought he told you. I would’ve said something, but he said you knew. I should’ve known better—I have to do everything for his sorry ass!"
“Easy, Abbie,” Royal growled.
Lana never gave up. I knew that from experience. She’d do anything to spend time with him, evening buying his attention and time if she had to. It was pathetic on her part, but he was wrong for falling for it.
"Quit. Tell her to shove the job up her ass. I mean it, Royal. She's trouble."
"Dramatics,” he said under his breath. “It’s good money, Jenna, and we can use it.”
My brain hurt from his stupidity. “Forget it, Royal. Do what you want. I’m going to bed. It doesn’t matter what I say, no one freaking listens.”
I walked away from him, from Abbie, and back to the tent. Benji was sprawled out on the mattress, and I climbed in behind him and pulled him against my body. Immediately I felt my center. Royal had his priorities out of order and his head up his ass. His excuses were wearing me out.
I was done.
Chapter 10
I'd been going nonstop since dawn. Between two softball games, carpooling Laney for a field trip, Benji's t-ball game, and dinner with my mom, I was exhausted. All I wanted to do was lose myself in a hot bubble bath and a trashy novel. I had a stack that I'd picked up at the grocery store and had yet to find time to read them. It was a rare night for me. All three of the girls were out with friends, Benji crashed early, and Royal was watching the game with Glenn. I had a nice, quiet house all to myself, and I was ready to take advantage of it.
I'd just run the water and filled the tub with my favorite bubble bath when I heard Macy scream my name from downstairs. I grabbed my robe, pulled it closed quickly, and ran down to see what was wrong.
The moment I saw her, my blood ran cold. She was in tears—no, she was hysterical. Wide eyes and mouth twisted with grief and Skylar holding her upright. Skylar looked as distraught as Macy did, but had managed to hold her composure.
My mind went straight to the worst-case scenarios every parent imagines when they see such a reaction. Car accidents, muggings, robbery, rape... death. My breath hitched, and my stomach turned in knots as I clutched a hand over my mouth, terrified of what she would say. I managed to clear the few remaining steps separating us and pulled her into my arms. "What happened, Macy? What's the matter?" I asked, smoothing my hand over her back.
"Daddy," she wailed. "Daddy... I saw him!"
I swung around and looked at Skylar, hoping she had answers. She shook her head, arms wrapped around her torso like she was trying to hold herself together. Her glassy eyes were so wide they looked eerie and fear stabbed me so hard my legs shook.
"What? Where is he? What happened? Oh God!" I cried.
I pulled Macy toward me and sat down on the bottom step and cradled her head against my chest.
“Call Tara and tell her something happened to Daddy. Tell her to come immediately—call 911.” I told Skylar forcefully.
"Mom!" she cried. "He's fine... he's..." she trailed off before covering her face with her hands and falling into sobs that wracked her entire body.
"Skylar!" I cried. "Please, someone call! You girls need to snap out of it and tell me what the hell is going on!"
Macy’s arms tightened. “I’m sorry, Mommy. I’m sorry, sorry,” she chanted over and over again.
Before I knew it, I was in tears with the rest of them. Devastation like I’d never felt hit me with the force of a truck. If he was hurt, or worse, I had to get to him. Help him. What the hell would I do without him?
I rocked Macy back and forth and cried while Skylar took a seat on the other side of me and wrapped her arm around my waist. We were all in shock, but sitting there crying wasn’t helping Royal.
“Macy, sweetheart, please. We have to get him help. Where is he? What happened?”
She took a stuttering breath and looked up at me with such profound sadness it physically hurt me to see it. It was a look I never wanted to see on my daughter’s face ever.
Never.
"I hate him, Mom. I hate him!" she screamed.
I shrank back in horror. "Macy Margaret! Don't you ever say something like that! You take that back!" I yelled.
The girls rushed to the steps and wrapped around Macy, creating a protective fortress. All four girls—Skyler and their friends Katie and Emily, who I hadn’t even realized were still there, cried as Macy shook her head, desperately trying to tell me what happened.
"What, Macy? What is it, honey? Tell me! Please!"
"He's cheating on you, Mom! We saw him with that lady... that bitch with the blonde hair! They were kissing!" she cried.
Everything stopped. My heart bounced in my chest and then came to a complete halt. The room spun rapidly, and I didn’t know what end was up. My world—my life—had become as grainy as a broken television.
"Oh God." I fell back against the banister of the staircase and pinched my temples with both hands to stop the rush of blood pushing against my skull.
"Mommy!" I heard one of my children cry just before I felt myself slip away.
My eyes fluttered open with the chill of cold water touching my skin. Skyler hovered over me, eyes blood shot and red and still full of anger and hurt. The washcloth felt good against my throbbing head, but my headache was far from gone. I’d never felt so much pain—emotional or physical—in my life.
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"Are you okay? You scared us, Mom," Macy said softly.
I stood up quickly—too quick for my already spinning head and sat down again.
"I'm okay, baby. You girls had me so worried... I thought he was hurt," I told her. I rubbed my thumb along her cheekbone and smiled. "I'm going to be fine."
It was a lie—a bold-faced lie. I had to lie, though. I couldn’t let them watch me fall apart. They were already badly affected. I had to be strong.
"Mom..." she whined. “You aren't fine! You can't be fine with this! You love Daddy... he can't do this to you!"
I pulled my knees up against my chest and shook my head in disbelief. "Mace, you need to go stay with Aunt Tara. I'm confused, and I don't want you guys to be here while I'm like this," I said as calmly as I could.
"No!" she said, standing, hands on her hips. "Mom, no. We'll stay with you. I'm scared, Mom!"
My body shook as anger took over. All the hurt I’d bottled up was pushed out of the way and allowed full-blown rage to take over. As broken as I felt inside, and as badly as my heart ached, I was livid. Anger was a far more intense emotion in that moment as I watched my daughter's life fall apart. I never in my wildest imagination thought Royal would stoop so low. I never thought he'd hurt us intentionally, and yet, there I was, comforting my daughters as they wept for their parents.
"Baby, shhh," I said, holding her against me. "Everything will be fine. I promise. Please go stay with Aunt Tara so Mommy can sort this out, okay?"
She pulled away and stared at me, looking for confirmation in my words. I tried to give her the assurance she needed. It was the greatest lie I would ever tell my daughter. Inside, I knew. Inside and in my heart, I was shattered. But I had to give her something... anything. I couldn't stand watching her suffer.
She was hesitant, but eventually obeyed my wishes and went upstairs to pack a bag. I had Skylar call Laney so her friend’s mother could drop her off at Tara’s and then she went up to get her and Benji’s things ready. While they were busy, I took a deep breath and called Tara to let her know what was going on. I hated putting something like that on her, but I knew she’d understand, and I could trust her to take care of them.