Burned

by J. Nichole Parkins

  “You are working on control, right?”

  “Yes, but-”

  “But nothing. You’ll get it.”

  “Not to be pessimistic, but by the time I get this under control, it’ll be something else.” I took a deep breath. “I. Am. Dangerous.” Finally. I seemed to have broken through. I could almost feel his hopes and dreams shatter around us like broken glass. The future he obviously still had planned with us together living on the ranch bringing up the next generation of hell-raisers, gone, slipping through his fingers like the sand he was raking. He swallowed, the sound an audible click. It was better this way. Now he could start over, find someone who deserved dreams like that, deserved to be his mate, deserved to have his children. Someone who wasn’t me.

  The silence stretch for several minutes. I wanted to get back onto safer topics. Get back onto friend territory.

  “So, what do you do in Wyoming without me to get you into trouble?” I bumped his shoulder with mine.

  “I have a hell of a lot more free time, that’s for sure.” He cleared his throat. “In addition to some of the day-to-day ranch duties, I work with Tori focusing on marketing and social media. We have a Facebook page now.”

  “Vern let you put up a Facebook page?” Incredulity filled my voice. I couldn’t imagine Uncle Vernon allowing such “new-fangled” changes.

  “He’s mostly retired now. Most of the business has been passed on to me and my cousins. I’m probably going to be named head of marketing within the next year or two when he fully retires.”

  “That’s great! Congratulations! I’m glad your degree has paid off.”

  “Thanks, me too.”

  “How long are you going to be away?” I hoped he wasn’t jeopardizing his career by taking time off to search for me.

  “Just a couple more weeks. It really is my vacation. I don’t take a lot, so I indulged in a long break.”

  “Do the others know you were down here looking for me?”

  “No. After you left I was frantic searching for you. I took the summer off looking all over the place. It was like you dropped off the planet. Not a trace. I went back to school in the fall and stopped talking about finding you after you didn’t come back for Christmas. I didn’t want to worry my family. I’m sure they were concerned about me at that point. But every so often I’d get an idea and try again, without being obvious to them about it. Only Cole knows I’ve been looking all these years. He thinks I’m crazy.”

  “You are crazy.”

  “Agreed, but I did find you.” He bumped my shoulder, a ghost of a smile flickered.

  “True.” My laughter was hollow. “They think you are down here having a nice relaxing vacation alone at the beach huh?”

  “Well, not exactly. Cole is here too.”

  “What?” My eyes widened as I looked around, not ready for that confrontation.

  “He’s visiting with his wife’s family in Orlando but he was here the first couple of days and will be back tomorrow.”

  “Oh man. I’m sure I’ll get to hear it from him too, huh?”

  “Probably. You know he’s relentless.” He was there to deal with the aftermath of my leaving. I’m sure I’d get blasted once he got back.

  “Wait a minute. What about his wife and kids?” My heart pounded.

  “They are staying in Orlando with her parents. He didn’t want to be around his in-laws that long. It worked out great for all of us.”

  “I could imagine. You guys can have a male bonding caveman type vacation now.” I toyed with the frayed edge of the towel. Picking at it.

  “Well, I’m sure there’ll be a visit to Tropicana Field for a Rays game or two. Too bad it’s not football season, I bet a Buccaneers game would be fun.”

  “You and your sports.”

  “If I remember correctly, you enjoyed dating the quarterback of our high school.”

  “It certainly wasn’t the fact you were quarterback.”

  “That’s right, it was my manly charm.”

  “Sure.” I forgot how much fun Gavin was to be around. He and his cousin had kept me from my pensive thoughts and were always good to get me out of a funk.

  I wanted to have some fun - the non-violent kind. It would be nice to simply enjoy spending time with someone. I could feel the energy building up in me again, swirling around me. Despite all the power I had, sometimes I think I’d give it all up just to be normal.

  “Gavin, I can’t sit here much longer.” I stretched feeling my muscles extend. Even though I spent the last hour swimming, it just wasn’t enough. These power shifts were causing havoc on my system.

  “Oh.” Crestfallen he rose, brushing sand from his legs. His emotions plain on his face.

  “Do you want to go do something else?” His head shot up in surprise. “You are on vacation. What do you want to do? My only stipulation is I have to keep moving.”

  “Is that a side-effect of your fire-starter thing?”

  “Kind of. More from a shift in power. I’m more unstable than usual lately because of it. I have to move more or constantly hang onto Spencer.”

  “What do you mean?” He finished packing my stuff in my bag and we headed away from the water.

  “Spencer is a Grounder. He dissipates my energy overflow when it becomes too much. That’s one of his talents and why we make such great partners. I’m more stable around him.”

  “Convenient,” he quipped.

  “It is, although I hate it.” I shrugged at his questioning gaze. “I don’t like having to depend on anyone. I can’t wait until things even out again.” He looked thoughtful, but kept walking.

  We decided to cook up some meat on the plethora of outdoor grills at his hotel. After a quick stop at the grocery store, we pulled into the hotel’s parking lot. As he promised there was a volleyball net set up next to one. We spent the rest of the day playing and cooked up several pounds of burgers. It was relaxing, something I really needed. I almost felt restored. Until nightfall.

  I felt the moment Alejandro woke. The night stretched before me, long and cavernous. I wanted to go to him. He would take away all my pain, my-

  “Kyra? Are you okay?” My vision cleared. Gavin was staring at me, concern etched in his features. I shook myself. As much as I hated to admit it, Spencer was right. My involvement with the vampire was getting too dangerous. But for whom? I could feel the pull of the night. Was this how regular shifters felt with the moon? No wonder it was so hard to resist. But I would.

  “Um, yeah. Just… I need a second.” I walked. Walked because if I started running, I didn’t know when I would have stopped. The energy was seeking me out, swirling around me, filling me. I had no destination in mind. No plan. I just needed to move. I had forgotten about Gavin until he caught up with me.

  “Kyra, I’m coming with you. You seem out of sorts.” I nodded in acknowledgment, but kept walking. Down to the beach, along the shore. On and on. Until I realized I would keep walking until I ended up downtown. At Alejandro’s.

  “Shit.”

  “What is it?” His brow furrowed, his worried gaze met mine.

  “You need to go. It’s dark. The vampires will be out soon. Its not safe.”

  He scoffed, “Yeah right. I can handle a couple of vamps.”

  Maybe. But not Alejandro.

  “Let’s go back.”

  “You aren’t afraid of vampires?” Gavin asked incredulous. His mocking laugh bristled my already frayed nerves.

  “Not afraid. It’s just-” I didn’t know how much to say. Words escaped me. “It’s complicated.” His eyebrow rose. Of course it was.

  “Fine, but I’m not sure you should be alone right now. You seem off. I can feel the static in the air.” We started walking back to the hotel. I agreed to come up for a bit, just to show him I was fine, and then head out. I should have known better.

  “Do you want me to call Spencer?” I knew how much the question cost him.

  “No really, I’m fine.”

  “Yeah rig
ht,” he snorted. “You look fine.” He was right, I was pacing again. Forcing myself to stop, I turned on the TV. It was some sort of reality show. Not my reality. I hated these things, but it was noise. I was sweating, the room getting warm despite the cooling air from the open balcony. My hands trembled.

  “I am fine. I’m going to head home.” I swallowed thickly. My vision was getting a little spotty. I turned to head out when he grabbed my shoulder, spinning me around.

  “What’s Spencer’s number?” he clipped, eyes wide. “Just give me your cell. I’ll call him.”

  “No.” I was getting drunk off the power swelling within me. Calling Spencer would probably be a good idea, but he wouldn’t get here in time. It was singing to me, a seductive harmony. Unable to think clearly, I closed my eyes. Gavin was able to get my phone from my bag. With the first tone my eyes shot open. “No Spencer,” I growled.

  “Your eyes are all freaky, kind of glowing. I don’t know how to help you so I’ll get someone who can.” Despite the fear I could smell coming off him in waves, his gaze was determined. He was strong. He would fight me if I didn’t let him. I came to my senses long enough to realize I was going to make a big mistake, but not as big as the one I was avoiding. I hoped. I had to do everything I could to keep from going to Alejandro. That, I was certain, would be really, really bad tonight.

  He was close. I grabbed his shirt. Pulling him closer I inhaled his scent, taking it deep into my lungs. Savoring it. Underneath the anxiety and worry he still wanted me. It was wrong, but I kissed him anyway. He responded immediately, dropping the phone and cupping my face hesitantly. Gentle despite his need, his want of me.

  It wasn’t like before, not when we were young nor our reunion the other night. It was energy, it was need, and it was dangerous. He met me as an equal, not as something to own or take care of, not tentative in exploration. Tonight was nothing more than need. The air was infused with it. The energy swirled around us, using us. Rising to a crescendo and crashing down as we did. Spent. I languished in his arms too tired to do anything more than breathe. And slipped away into sleep to the sound of his even breathing.

  “I swear.” The door crashed closed. “I love my in-laws but they get crazier every time I visit.” A bag thudded to the floor. “What the- Oops.” He still sounded the same, smelled like family, like home. I just wanted to hide under the sheets still twisted around us and never come out. I felt Gavin stir, his arm tensed around me, squeezing gently. Reassuring.

  “Sorry cuz. I’ll just get some breakfast downstairs.” Taking a couple of steps back toward the door he added under his breath, “Again.” Gavin untangled himself from the sheet.

  “It’s okay, Cole. We just lost track of time.” The bed shook as he pulled on shorts. “I’ll give you a moment,” he added to me as he walked out of the room with his cousin.

  “I’ll bet you lost track of time,” his cousin snickered as they walked out.

  It was time to face the music; best to get it over with quickly, like ripping off a Band-Aid. I dragged myself out of the bed and pulled on Gavin’s shirt. My bikini top and swim cover were nowhere to be found, but at least I located the bottoms.

  “What! Kyra?” Cole’s shocked bellow filtered clearly through the door. I was going to be in for it. I sucked in a fortifying breath and pulled open the hotel room door.

  I would have laughed if it weren’t such a fucked up situation. The look on Cole’s face was priceless; eyes wide and astonished. He may be the only person that knew about Gavin’s continual search for me, but he never thought he’d actually find me.

  “Oh my god. Kyra? It really is you!” He moved forward to pick me up in a hug but remembered at the last minute my reluctance at being touched. I leaped into his arms instead. He squeezed me so hard I couldn’t breathe. Laughing he spun me around. “Let me look at you! You barely look the same. Nice hair.” He rubbed my short spikes, still messy from sleep. “I just can’t believe it. After all this time. You-” I could see it the moment it hit him. His eyes flashed angrily. Another open book, his thoughts plastered clearly on his face. He’d hold it all in for now, for Gavin. But I’d get to hear it later. And soon. I nodded, understanding.

  He hadn’t changed much, a little bigger, more filled out. He looked good, so much like Gavin it was amazing. Same build, muscles rippled from working the ranch, same hazel eyes and blond hair. His was a little neater than Gavin’s though, probably a side effect from being married. Married! I had a hard time believing it. He was such a player when we were kids, never with the same girl longer than a few weeks.

  We decided to catch up over breakfast. Food was the primary focus for a shifter, high metabolism meant constant eating. While Gavin and I searched for my missing clothes, Cole ordered room service. We talked over a huge platter of eggs, bacon, grits, and sausage gravy biscuits. Did I mention I loved southern cooking?

  We skirted around taboo topics. Cole told me all about his family, how married life treated him, and life on the ranch. I talked about my job - it’s not like I had much else.

  “I just can’t believe it, Kyra. A PI? You?” He laughed and drank the rest of his orange juice. I was on my third cup of coffee already, it wasn’t near as strong as my brew. “What type of cases do you work on?”

  “A little bit of everything. Cheating spouses, corporate espionage, missing persons.”

  “Oh that’s ironic.” His warm laughter filled the room. I rolled my eyes at him. But he was right. “Are you any good?”

  “It pays the bills. Usually,” I added. Currently it was much more lucrative. Between the FBI and Alejandro’s “gifts” I was living quite comfortably.

  My phone vibrated on the table. After glancing at the caller ID I gulped the rest of my coffee and rose from the table. “Speaking of work.”

  “Richards,” I answered.

  “Another body.” The levity of the last few hours fled quickly. I shuttered my expression. Spencer wasted no time. “Docks. Pier 309.”

  “Got it. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” He hung up quickly. It must be bad. The strain was evident in his voice. Fortunately I didn’t have to stop by my condo; I kept a couple of spare outfits in the saddlebag on my bike. In my line of work I never knew if I was going to get bled on or end up naked somewhere.

  Maybe I should find a new line of work.

  “Sorry guys. I’ve gotta go.”

  “Spencer?” Gavin asked tightly. I nodded, sighing inside. This had been such a mistake. Again. No matter the best of intentions, we kept ending up in bed together.

  We were so dysfunctional. I’d hope Cole could talk some sense into him, but seeing as though it hadn’t worked in the years since I’d left, I doubt it would do any good now. Cole looked pissed again, assuming things that weren’t.

  “My partner,” I clarified for him. “He’s FBI.” Cole looked a little abashed, his eyes filled with questions. But I had no time to explain. I kissed him on the cheek. “We’ll catch up later. Enjoy your vacation guys.” I waved as I headed out the door.

  Gavin was there in a flash before I could escape. Stupid preternatural reflexes. I knew Cole could still hear us but he tried to give us at least a pretense of privacy by turning his back.

  “You’ve got another couple of weeks here, right?” He nodded. “I’ll try to call you later. That’s all I can give you. Don’t press for more.” I cautioned narrowing my eyes.

  “Fine.” He leaned into me, our breaths mingling. His scent enveloped me, drawing me in, making me want to stay. Our lips brushed in a sweet kiss. “Be careful, Kyra. We’ll talk later.”

  I’m sure we would.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Air whipped by as I sped my bike to the docks, the scents blew numerous and thick: salt, sea, decay. And under it all the unmistakable odor of decomposing meat.

  I swallowed thickly, steeling myself for what I’d find, but I knew nothing I could do would make this any easier.

  Chunks of the body were strewn from one end of the dock
to the other; no doubt we’d find several pieces in the water. Thankful that someone else would be collecting those in scuba gear and not me, I distanced myself from the scene. Approached it clinically. A job. It’s just a dead thing.

  Spencer stood at the end of the pier, staring into the horizon. His blue and white striped tie flapped in the breeze from the bay, the ends fluttering as if waving me over. Turning as he heard me approach, his eyes bored into mine.

  “I’m not going to like this am I?”

  His lips pressed together, narrowed.

  “Nope.” He was popping his p’s again.

  I wanted to sigh, but stopped myself, trying to keep the scent from invading my body any further.

  “Find any of the bone fragments yet?”

  At the negative shake of his head Spencer raised his eyebrow asking silently for my help.

  Dread weighed heavily on my chest, I didn’t want to risk shifting at the docks. The risk of exposure was great. I briefly considering asking Gavin or Cole to help, since they were open about shifting. My heart seized and I threw the idea out before it could take root. I didn’t want either of them involved.

  Could I really keep doing this? The death. The carnage. Brushing so close to the evil that surrounded us frequently. It was wearing on my soul. I wanted to run. To turn back time and pass on this job. I wasn’t even sure if all the added blackness to my soul was worth knowing who I was anymore.

  My life before seemed almost normal in comparison.

  I shook myself out of my morose mood. Focused on the scene. I had to make my choice worth the consequences. I had to solve this case.

  My partner ran his fingers through his hair, lengthening with neglect. His eyes were pinched, dark circles growing. This case was wearing on him too.

  “All we know at this point is that the body is pretty fresh and female.”

  My steps faltered as I walked closer to the scattered pieces, reminding myself to think of it as an object, not a person. With a good portion of the pieces lost in the water, the carnage was on a smaller scale than the others.