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"You're right," I said. "It shouldn't take long at all, because what I have to say on the subject can be said in one minute or less: Amy and Ron Peters are excellent parents. It's ridiculous for anyone to imply otherwise."
"What makes you think I'm here to discuss Ron and Amy Peters?" Hilda Chisholm asked, eyeing me coldly.
That surprised me. "Aren't you?" I asked.
"Actually," she replied, "no, I am not."
"I see," I said, although that was a lie. I didn't see at all.
When we reached Belltown Terrace's top floor, once again the elevator doors swished open. "This way," I said, pointing her to the door of my apartment. Using my key, I unlocked the door, then held it open to allow Hilda Chisholm to enter.
My high-tech security system was on, which meant that as we entered the foyer, both lights and music came on automatically. I motioned Hilda into the living room. Again, alerted and directed by a sensor I carry on my key chain, both lights and music followed.
Hilda Chisholm stopped in the middle of the room and glanced around. "Very nice," she said.
"Thank you," I replied, although I didn't realize until much later that she never intended her comment as a compliment.
"Won't you sit down?" I invited.
Most people coming into my apartment for the first time are irresistibly drawn to the spectacular view to be seen from the window seat that lines the entire western exposure of the living room. Seated on the cushions under a long expanse of glass, my guests look out over the shipping lanes both in and out of Elliott Bay as well as farther out on Puget Sound. With the help of a mirrored corner column, nighttime visitors can also peer around the corner of the building to view the panorama of downtown city lights. In daylight, when the weather is clear and the Cascades aren't shrouded in clouds, that same mirror sometimes reflects back glimpses of a snowcapped Mount Rainier rising up above and beyond the downtown high-rises.
Hilda Chisholm made for the window seat, all right, but obviously, she was no connoisseur of views. Without even bothering to glance outside, she sat down with her back to the window, with her briefcase balanced on her lap, with her sock-clad legs clapped firmly and primly together and with her sour expression permanently etched on her face. Everything about her manner announced clearly that this wasn't a social visit. That being the case, I saw no reason to play host. Settling into my leather lounger, I pushed it back into a fully reclining position.
I was tired. I'd had one hell of a day. Still, I suppose dropping into the recliner that way showed a certain contempt for someone who, as an investigator for Child Protective Services, ought to have been a cosupporter of truth, justice, and the American way. In view of what was coming, however, a little healthy disrespect for my fellow public servant was definitely the order of the day.
"If you didn't come to talk to me about Ron and Amy's parenting skills, what are you doing here?" I asked.
"I came to talk about you," she said.
"Me?" I asked in surprise. "Why me?"
"Because you are a prime consideration in my investigation." Once again, she smiled her chilly smile, one that lowered the temperature in my living room by a full ten degrees. "What I'm most interested in knowing, Mr. Beaumont," she continued, "is why a man like you-a man with all the money in the world and with known transsexual contacts-would take such an unhealthy interest in those two little girls."
"Transsexual contacts?" I echoed.
"One of your fellow detectives mentioned to me that Johnny Bickford, one of Seattle's most infamous cross-dressers, is a special friend of yours."
"Special friend!" I choked. "Are you kidding? I barely know the man, but obviously, you've been chatting with Detective Kramer behind my back. That creep…"
"Naturally, I spoke with several of your coworkers," Hilda returned, unperturbed. "I'm conducting an investigation, you see."
Gradually, an understanding of the scope of her accusations was beginning to seep into my consciousness. "An investigation, or a kangaroo court?" I demanded, while my temper rose several degrees.
The room was quiet for several moments while Hilda Chisholm eyed my reaction with a disquieting, coolly speculative gaze.
"The girls' mother, Constance Peters, is very much concerned about that, especially now that she's learned-through a local television news broadcast, no less-that the girls are sometimes left alone in your care and under your control."
"Give me a break! Are we back to those stupid soapsuds again?" I sat up abruptly, letting the recliner's footrest slam down to the thickly carpeted floor with a resounding thump. "If so, you need to talk to Gail Richardson down on nineteen. Her mother's been visiting. It turns out she's the one whose attempt at cleaning turned into a mountain of suds."
"This has nothing whatever to do with soapsuds," Hilda interrupted, "although that incident is part of what brought this unfortunate situation to our attention. If the girls had been properly supervised at the time-"
"What unfortunate situation?" I interrupted.
"Your inappropriate involvement with the Peters girls."
"Inappropriate!" I exclaimed while the social worker's cold, unwavering stare sent a chill clear through me.
"Wait just a damn minute here! What exactly do you mean by inappropriate?"
She smiled. "You tell me."
"Are you suggesting that I'm some kind of dirty old man and that I'm interested in the girls for some kind of immoral purpose?"
Hilda Chisholm raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you?" she returned.
Calmly, she removed a notebook from her briefcase and thumbed it open. "For starters," she said, "let me ask you this, Mr. Beaumont. Did you or did you not pay money-your own personal money-to fund a good deal of the mission that sent Constance Peters to Central America three and a half years ago?"
"She was Roslyn Peters then," I told her. "And that was a contribution. A charitable contribution."
"I'm sure it was," Hilda smiled again. "Arranged by a man named Ralph Ames, I believe. Who exactly is he?"
"Ralph? He's my attorney."
"Your personal attorney?"
"Yes."
"And you keep him on retainer?"
"Yes."
"And why would an ordinary homicide detective need to have a personal attorney on retainer?"
"My reasons for having an attorney on retainer are none of your business, Ms. Chisholm. Although they could be. I'm sure Ralph would be more than happy to help me take you to court. Defamation of character is no joke, and I'm not going to take it lying down. And based on that, I think you'd better leave."
It took every bit of self-restraint I could muster to keep from leaping out of the recliner and simply throttling the woman on the spot.
Hilda Chisholm, however, made no move to leave. "But, Mr. Beaumont," she said, "I was sure you'd want to give me your side of the story."
"No," I returned, "I don't think so. I'm not going to dignify this ridiculous process by according it the benefit of two sides. In addition, as long as I have an attorney available to protect my interests, I don't intend to say another word to you until he is present."
"Your insisting on the presence of an attorney indicates a certain reluctance on your part, Mr. Beaumont. An unwillingness to cooperate. It makes it sound as though you have something to hide."
"I'm a police officer," I reminded her. "You're accusing me of a serious crime-a felony. Not having my attorney present at the time of questioning is a violation of my constitutional rights."
"This is simply an informal inquiry," she said.
"Like hell it is," I retorted. "Now get out of here."
"Very well, Mr. Beaumont," she said, carefully returning her notebook to the briefcase and closing the lock with a sharp snap. "But I will have to say in my report that you were uncooperative and abusive. Cursing is considered abusive, you know."
"You can put any damned thing you want to in your report, but only if you're out of my apartment within the next thirty seconds. Otherwise, you'll
be writing that report with two broken arms."
"And I'll have to report that as a threat," she responded.
"No, Madame Chisholm," I said, "that was no threat. It's a goddamned promise!"
She retreated as far as the doorway before she paused long enough to deliver her parting shot. "I suppose you know Captain Freeman?"
"Tony Freeman, of Internal Investigations?"
"Yes, that's the one. I have an appointment to discuss this matter with him tomorrow morning at nine o'clock. I expect he'll be taking some action pending the outcome of my investigation, of course."
Thankfully, she left then. And it's a good thing, too. If she had stayed one second longer, there's a good possibility I might have done something I would have regretted for the rest of my life.
Fifteen
I brooded over Hilda Chisholm's visit all the way to Bellevue. Once there, I found my way to the Grove on Twelfth. Following Virginia Marks' directions, I parked beneath the building in a spot designated VISITOR. Then I locked the door to the Porsche and walked over to the elevator. There, almost on top of the elevator, sat the powder-blue Crown Victoria complete with its Braun Chair Topper. At least she's here, I thought.
After consulting the listing next to the door, I punched the proper number into the security phone and waited for her phone to ring. It did. Several times. On about the sixth ring, the same old voice mail recording I had heard before came on once again, inviting me to leave a message at the sound of the tone.
I didn't want to leave a message. I wanted to talk to this woman in person. And for good reason. Virginia Marks, a detective who certainly should have known better, had nonetheless conspired with Grace Highsmith to conceal evidence in a homicide investigation. To my way of thinking, not only did I have a reason to talk to Virginia Marks; I also had a scheduled appointment, so she, by God, owed me the common courtesy of answering her goddamned door. A glance at my watch told me I was five minutes early. Still, my old door-to-door-salesman instincts were already sending me the message that I was about to be stood up.
For a few minutes, I stayed where I was, standing next to the security phone and the elevator door. Three residents came by and let themselves into the locked elevator with keys. The last one, an elderly gentleman, gave me a particularly questioning look. "Can I help you with something?" he asked.
"It's all right," I said vaguely. "I'm just waiting for someone."
Rather than continue standing there looking like an idiot, I retreated to the Porsche. Five minutes passed; fifteen; then twenty. Every five minutes or so, I would climb out of the car, walk over to the phone, and dial her up again. Each time when there was no answer in Virginia Marks' apartment, I let it get to me that much more.
I say it, but I'm not talking about just one it. That it was all-encompassing-including everything and nothing. It was Virginia Marks for messing with the evidence and then standing me up when I knew damned good and well she was up in her apartment and simply not answering her phone. It was Karen Beaumont Livingston for having the bad manners to up and die on me. It was a pushy bureaucrat named Hilda Chisholm for accusing me of being a goddamned child molester. It was Grace Highsmith for being a dotty little old lady who carried a gun in her purse that turned out to be a damned murder weapon. And for Paul Kramer for being a gossipy, loose-mouthed son of a bitch.
All of those things taken together added up to quite a load.
Half an hour went by; thirty-five minutes; forty. I was still getting in and out of the car every five minutes to check on my appointment, and every five minutes, there still wasn't any answer. Finally, all those its became too much. Too damned much!
There were tools I could have used if I had wanted to avail myself of them. My cellular phone was right there in the car. My AA sponsor, Lars Jenssen, was literally only a phone call away. But I didn't care, and I didn't call.
Around ten or so, cold and disgusted, I decided to go somewhere and buy myself a cup of coffee, because by then, I had made up my mind that no matter how long it took, I was going to wait out Virginia Marks. I was far too stubborn to give up and go home. I had an appointment, by God, and I wasn't leaving before Virginia Marks shaped up and answered her phone. And since I was right there practically in the middle of downtown Bellevue, I decided to walk to wherever I was going to get that cup of coffee.
Bad decision.
There was a bank on the corner of Twelfth and Bellevue Way, and a strip shopping mall of some kind beyond that. But the very next place on the left-hand side of the street was a restaurant-one of those barbecued-rib joints. Drawn by the warm aroma of meat cooked over an open flame, I stepped inside.
Compared to outside, the restaurant was warm and inviting. A young, smiling hostess hurried to the front podium to inform me that the kitchen was just closing. "That's all right," I said, "all I want is a cup of coffee."
"In that case," she said, "would you mind sitting at the bar?"
"Not at all," I answered. "No problem."
I grabbed a stool at the near end of the bar, and there on the counter right in front of me, as if it were fate itself, I saw an old, dear friend of mine-a bottle of MacNaughton's.
"Did I hear you say coffee?" the bartender asked, hurrying toward me.
"No," I said, "I changed my mind. Give me a Mac and water."
And that was all there was to it. No drumrolls. No lightning flashes, just, Give me a Mac and water. The bartender who served it up to me was totally innocent of any wrongdoing. He had no way of knowing that this was my first drink in over two years.
In zoos you always see signs that say, DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. Maybe alcoholics should all be required to wear tattoos that say, NO BOOZE, PLEASE. I AM A DRUNK.
In Alcoholics Anonymous, I've often heard stories about people plotting out a game plan for falling off the wagon-planning the where, why, and when of it in great gory detail and well in advance of the actual event. For me, there was no planning. Until I saw the bottle of MacNaughton's sitting there on the counter staring back at me, I hadn't realized I wanted a drink-hadn't anticipated having one or even thought about it much. But when that first taste of booze touched my tongue-when that first long gulp of alcohol blasted into my long-sober system, it tasted great.
For the first half hour or so, I was on top of the world. Invincible. Nothing at all mattered. Nothing, including the fact that I hadn't had a bite to eat in more than ten hours.
"Ready for another?" the bartender asked sometime later.
That, of course, was the critical moment. If I could have walked away from the second drink, even more so than the first, I might have been all right. But it turns out that I'm an alcoholic. Saying no wasn't an option.
"Sure," I said, shoving my empty glass across the bar. "Why the hell not?"
By the end of the second drink, all the other things I had been worrying about and agonizing over disappeared off the face of the earth. They simply went away. I have no idea how many drinks I drank, because I don't remember much after I watched with grave interest while the bartender poured my third.
During most of my adult life, I prided myself on my tolerance for booze. When it came to drinking somebody under the table, I was usually the last man left standing in any given room. Maybe, without my noticing, that legendary tolerance may have been dropping some before I ever went into treatment. Inarguably, between then and the time I took that first drink in Bellevue, somebody pulled a dirty trick on me. It turns out that I couldn't hold my liquor anymore, not worth a tinker's damn.
From the time I took the first sip of the third drink to the time I woke up in what turned out to be the Silver Cloud Motel just up the street, I don't remember a thing-not a damned thing. And when I did wake up-when I finally came to my senses and opened my aching eyes-I wished I hadn't, because I was sick as a dog-more hung over than I've ever been in my whole life. Barely able to stand, I lurched into the bathroom and barfed my guts into the toilet.
Then, as I staggered back to bed, I r
ealized that midnight had come and gone without my ever calling Dave Livingston down in Rancho Cucamonga the way he'd asked me to. Once again, I'd screwed up and let my family down. As usual.
Filled with revulsion and self-loathing, I looked at my watch. It said it was eight o'clock in the morning on Thursday, January 4. I was lying stark naked on the bed of a strange motel room with no knowledge of how or when I'd come to be there. The only thing I did know for sure was that since it was eight A.M., I was now late for work.
Slowly and shakily, feeling like an old man, I showered and managed to clamber back into my stinky clothing. Aware that I was checking out of the place without benefit of luggage, I felt like an errant schoolboy when I walked up to the desk in the lobby.
"Why, good morning, Mr. Beaumont," a cheery young female desk clerk said to me, looking at the number on my key and comparing it to the name on her computer screen. "I hope you slept well."
"Oh, yes," I stammered, hoping I sounded more convincing than I felt or looked. "It was fine." I glanced outside, but there was no sign of a parking lot in front of the motel.
"Can I help you with something?" the young woman behind the desk wanted to know.
Embarrassed, my ears turned red. "I seem to have misplaced the parking lot," I said.
She smiled tolerantly, as though having overnight guests lose the parking lot was a commonplace occurrence. "It's around back," she said.
"Thanks."
I found the lot with no further difficulty, but my Guards Red Porsche wasn't there, either. Not only had I misplaced the parking lot, I had also lost my car.
I walked back to the front of the motel. I was standing there looking blankly to the right and left, up and down Twelfth, trying to figure out what the hell to do next, when a Bellevue city cop came steaming by in a black-and-white, lights flashing and siren screeching. When he jammed on his brakes, skidded, and slowed, and then bounced into the
parking garage underneath the Grove on Twelfth, I suddenly remembered very clearly exactly where I had left my missing 928.