Billionaire Baby Daddy: A Second Chance Romance

by Lara Swann

  But then, she’s more used to me taking her random places than I’d like.

  Dylan comes in a moment later and sits down on the easy chair opposite - and then we both seem to realize we’re alone in the room together at the same time.

  He looks at me uncertainly, and I try not to feel awkward about the whole thing. I wish I’d insisted on helping with the ice cream, now.

  The last time we’d seen each other, I’d been throwing the shit he’d left around my dorm back at him as he made a quick retreat.

  “So…it’s awesome that you and Emma are starting a clinic together.” I start, trying for the peace-offering approach.

  “Ugh, yeah.” He glances at Maddie, seemingly still surprised at the appearance of my daughter. “And, um…well, it seems you’ve been busy too.”

  I bristle for a moment, trying not to interpret that as having sex with loads of guys and getting pregnant way too early.

  Instead, I smile down at my daughter. “Yeah, this one keeps me on my toes.”

  Maddie gives me a sleepy look that seems to deny that claim, and I wonder whether I should just take her to bed. But now that ice cream has been mentioned, I’m only going to get a tantrum if I try that.

  “It’s not quite what I pictured for you, I gotta say.” Dylan gives a short laugh, displaying the same lack of tact I remember too well from college.

  “I guess things don’t always work out how you plan.” I shrug.

  “Yeah, that’s true. I never would’ve guessed Emma was looking to start something like this, but hey, if you’re in the right place…” He smiles at me, then looks over at Maddie again. “So is her father still around?”

  I have a moment to stare at him before outrage swamps me.

  Who the hell asks something like that?!

  And even worse, I notice Maddie look up at that, even in her sleepy state.

  Before I get the chance to retort with the sort of biting comment I want to, Emma walks in - which might be a good thing, because I can’t think of anything that would be appropriate around Maddie right now.

  “Ice cream!” Maddie jumps up, peering down at it as Emma places the bowls on the table in front of us. “Can I, Mommy?”

  I force my irritation with Dylan away and smile at her. “Sit down and I’ll get you some, sweetie. And then someone needs to be getting to sleep.”

  She doesn’t even object, bouncing back onto the couch while I pass her the bowl and spoon, making sure they’re balanced before I let go.

  “Brrrr…” She shivers. “It’s cold!”

  I ruffle her hair with a smile, watching as she squirms under the cold bowl, and simultaneously tries to scoop out the ice cream.

  At least it’s enough that she seems distracted from Dylan’s comment.

  I take some ice cream myself, and don’t miss the way Emma looks between the two of us, obviously picking up on the tension.

  We try and make a little awkward conversation after that, but it’s obvious that Emma’s intention of moving the evening from business to social doesn’t quite work with the three of us. Dylan is certainly not someone I would ever choose to hang out with - and while I don’t want to get in the way of Emma’s evening, their casual chat seems at least a little strained as well.

  They exchange a few comments about common friends or acquaintances - people I vaguely remember from college, and a couple I don’t know at all - but when the ice cream is finished, Dylan is quick to mention other plans for the evening, and I can’t deny being relieved to see him go.

  “Well, it was nice seeing you again Leah.” He says, standing up. “And I’ll catch up with you about that property next week, Emma, okay?”

  She nods, and I rise as well, pulling a full-and-happy little girl up into my arms as I do.

  “Yes, it was…unexpected. I hope your physio plans go well, Dylan.” I glance at Emma. “I should probably put this one to bed, too.”

  We all filter out into the hallway, and as we walk past Dylan, Maddie looks up at him from where I was sure she was half asleep.

  “Are you my Daddy?” She asks, curiosity mixed with sleep in her voice.

  We both freeze, and my cheeks burn in sudden embarrassment.

  “No!” Dylan shoots me a panicked look, and I can practically see him trying to guess how old she is and do the calculation in his head. “I’m not…right?”

  “No, no of course not.” I say. “It’s just…something she’s been asking recently.”

  That would be a horrific idea. But I still don’t like Maddie seeing him react that way to the idea, and I know I’m scowling as I turn away.

  I bounce her on my hip, and force my expression to smooth out.

  “No, baby girl, he’s not your Daddy.” I say softly.

  “Okay.” She says, and I don’t know whether I’m imagining the disappointment there or not.

  “Maddie…baby…you can’t ask people that. It’s not nice for them, okay?”

  “But…then…how will I find him?” She’s frowning up at me, and I can feel my heart contracting in my chest.

  “You don’t have to worry about that, Maddie. Okay? That’s something for your Mommy to worry about.” I say quietly.

  “You’re going to find my Daddy?” Her solemn eyes seem to pierce mine, and I can’t look away.

  My breath catches, but then I take a deep breath and lean in close.

  “I’ll try, baby. I’m going to try.” I whisper it, then kiss her forehead and cuddle her closer as the magnitude of what’s been on my mind the last few days starts becoming real.

  She looks at me for a long moment, then nods.

  “But right now, I have one very tired little girl to look after.”

  I glance over my shoulder to see Emma exchanging a few last words with Dylan - who looks unnerved enough that he’s definitely trying to get out of here - and then I head down the hallway with Maddie.

  After all the travel, then the food and it being far past her bedtime, it’s easy to get her settled. By the time I’ve tucked her in, I can already hear her breathing steadily, and I brush a light hand over her forehead before tip-toeing out of the room.

  Thank god for that.

  I come face-to-face with Emma a moment later, and she gives me an unrepentant look of curiosity.

  “Is she okay?” She has enough sense to talk quietly, and I just nod.

  “Hopefully out for the night.”

  I gesture away from the spare room with my head, and we move slowly back into the living room.

  Once we get there though, there’s no getting away from Emma.

  “Okay, girl - you have some talking to do.” She says it with a grin though, and I can see her eyes sparkling. “Shall I get the wine?”

  I laugh lightly, and can’t help returning her grin as she jumps up to pour us a couple of glasses.

  By the time she’s back, I’ve relaxed into the couch and I’m almost ready to follow Maddie to sleep myself. It’s not even 9pm, and it’d be the earliest night’s sleep I would have had in a long time, but I can feel how badly my body wants it.

  As soon as Emma curls up on the couch next to me - nudging my feet out of the way and handing me a glass of wine - I quickly forget about that, though. My body might want rest, but my mind doesn’t get to have a girls’ evening on the couch nearly as often as I’d like.

  I take a sip of the wine and relax even further.

  I can’t deny how nice it is, just being here. It’s not just how nice Emma’s little place is - tastefully decorated, cozy and with the vibe of a well lived in home - though that’s part of it. It’s partly how different it is from the run-down, chaotic mess of my place - and, if I’m honest, my whole life.

  It reminds me of the sort of place I used to live.

  It takes a long moment before I open my eyes and smile at Emma again, and she gives an exaggerated breath of relief.

  “Thank god, hun. I thought I was going to have to wake you up just to get a little conversation out of you, and I w
ould’ve felt pretty bad about that.”

  “But you’d have done it anyway, huh?”

  “Yeah, sorry hun. Priorities.” She grins, a flash of perfectly white teeth that only make her cherubic face even cuter. “So, c’mon…you know you’re always welcome here, but I never thought you’d actually come. And you could’ve given me some warning - this place is hardly child-safe, you know - I’m dying of curiosity here. You are okay, right? Has something happened?”

  She squeezes my knee where it’s curled up under me and I smile, a little awkwardly. Sometimes I think Emma is a better friend than I deserve.

  She’s certainly the only one I still have from college - and I wouldn’t even have her, if she hadn’t been so determined about it. Dylan was right about that - I did disappear. I dropped out of college and left without a word.

  I’m not sure what it was, but after Alistair it was hard enough living and studying here - and then when I discovered I was pregnant…I couldn’t bring myself to tell anyone.

  I think I always intended to come back, eventually. After I’d had my child, had support worked out with my parents so that I could get my life in order and be able to study again. Then I’d be able to face the people that I’d known before, and feel like me - someone who was going somewhere, doing things.

  But that had never happened.

  Emma had been the one person who hadn’t accepted that disappearance. She’d tracked me down, months after I’d left, and I can still remember the shock we’d both had - her at seeing me eight months pregnant, and me at seeing her right there on my doorstep in Pittsburgh.

  I guess it’s moments like that when you know you’ve met someone special. Someone who’ll be there for you even after you make shit-stupid decisions that you cling onto because of damn stubborn pride.

  We talked for hours about anything and everything - except for the fact I’d left college, the obvious baby on the way, or what I was doing in a cramped, damp house that looked liable to fall down around me. Until I finally felt able to break down and tell her all the ways I’d fucked up my life.

  Since then, she’s come to visit whenever she can - and she obviously adores Maddie. I feel like she wants to do more to help us out, too, but there’s only so much I can take. What I’ve needed most has been a friend. And that’s what she’s always been for me.

  “I came back to find Maddie’s father.” I finally say.

  Emma just stares are me for a moment.

  “Her father?” She repeats, after a long silence.

  I take another sip of my wine - maybe a slightly big one - and nod.

  “You mean the father you made me swear up and down never to talk about, ever. That father?”

  I roll my eyes at her.

  “Yes, that father.” I try and put some exasperation into my voice, but it doesn’t quite work.

  I should’ve guessed at that reaction.

  “Okay, okay, so…who is he?” Her eyes are gleaming, and I suddenly realize she’s been wanting to ask about this for a long time. “Is he someone I know?”

  “No…well, I don’t know. Probably not.” I say, before I remember that I don’t want to talk about this.

  If it all goes wrong…

  “I can’t tell you, Em. Not yet. I don’t know…I don’t know what he’s going to say. And if it doesn’t work out…I just don’t want…”

  I can’t even explain what I don’t want, but I know she gets it. Even if she does let out a dramatic sigh and doesn’t quite let up.

  “Seriously? You’re going to go find him, and I can’t even know who the mystery man is? What is it about this dude? Oh, it’s definitely someone I know then…” Her eyes widen briefly, and she lets out a short gasp. “It’s not Dylan, is it? I mean I know you said, but—”

  “God, no. Fuck me, Em.” I throw a pillow at her, laughing, and then I make a point of shuddering. “Can you imagine if he was? Ugh…”

  “Well, he’s got a good chance of being father to more kids than he probably wants to think about…” She giggles naughtily. “Ohh, Leah, did you see his expression when Maddie asked that? I thought I was going to die watching.”

  Somehow, her laughter is infectious and I can’t help joining in - finally able to see the funny side of it now that Maddie is asleep and Dylan is gone.

  “He did look pretty terrified.” I agree, already feeling the wine start to mellow me a little.

  I’m not used to drinking it so often anymore - the days when I could put two bottles away with Emma in college seem long gone, and it’s probably fast on its way to knocking me out.

  “To be fair, I don’t know many guys that wouldn’t be - being suddenly confronted with something like that.” She laughs again, but the words hit me a little harder than I’d like.

  “Oh, shit.” She catches my expression. “Sorry, that was stupid. I didn’t mean…fuck. I do put my foot in it sometimes, don’t I?”

  I give her a reassuring smile, and shake my head, even if I can’t quite shake off the reminder of my own concerns about telling Alistair.

  “It’s okay. I don’t think I’m even expecting anything from him. But…I can’t ignore that he exists anymore.”

  “Because Maddie is asking about it?” Emma asks, not without sympathy.

  “Partly, I guess. I mean, it certainly doesn’t help that she seems to have picked up the habit of checking whether any new guy we encounter is, in fact, her father, but…” I shrug a little awkwardly. “It’s more than that.”

  Emma doesn’t say anything for a long time, just lets me sit there and think about it. She waits until I’ve built myself up, and can finally admit what I’ve been trying to hide for far too long.

  When I look up at her, I can’t help the tears in my eyes. The ones that never quite get a chance to fall, these days.

  “I think I’m failing her, Em.” I blink them closed, and take another long sip of wine, shaking my head angrily. “She’ll be going off to kindergarten in fall, and it’s bad enough that I couldn’t afford a pre-school, but…fuck. I’ve just barely been getting by for so long and…and if that’s how it’s got to be, then, then okay. I’ll do what I can. But if she’s got another chance? If her father might want to help out, just a little…I can’t live with the idea that I didn’t give her that.”

  “Ohh, Leah…” Emma sets her glass down and reaches out to pull me into a hug. “You’re not failing her, hun. Whatever happens, or whatever you want to do…Maddie is happy and healthy and it’s clear as day how much you matter to that girl. And…considering everything, what you’ve done is nothing short of completely remarkable. Hell, I wonder every day how you manage, and yet…you do—”

  “I don’t.” I finally let out, the sob coming out of me from somewhere far too deep. “I try, but I’m not. If something happens—anything—we’re screwed, Maddie and I.”

  “Hush, nonsense…lots of things have happened, Leah, and you’re still here. Maddie’s still smiling. And—”

  “No, it’s not that.” I interrupt, but I can’t hold myself back anymore. The things that I haven’t even wanted to admit to myself are spilling over. “You’re—you’re meant to want the best for your child, right? To give them all the things you never got, all the chances and opportunities you couldn’t have? But—but, with Maddie, it’s like it’s gone the other way. I—I could do so many things. Things she can’t. I had so—so much, in my future, and—and, I’m terrified that she…she…”

  Emma wraps me up into her arms as I lose control, for the first time I can remember in so long. All my fears and insecurities come bubbling out and I gasp them out between sniffling half-breaths.

  She soothes and murmurs me the same way I would with Maddie, and when I run out of energy to say anymore, she lets me slump back against the couch and close my eyes.

  My head is thumping with painful pulses, my whole body feels wrung out and I’m completely drained, but…somehow, I feel a little lighter. Like being able to admit all the things that have been on my mi
nd has made a difference somehow - or maybe it’s just having someone to talk to who isn’t the four-year-old directly affected by all those concerns.

  I don’t know.

  But when my breathing calms down again, I reach over and squeeze Emma’s hand.

  “I’m sorry—” I start, but she doesn’t let me.

  “Don’t be. I’m still in awe of you, for the record.” She says. “And I’d be worried if you weren’t shit-scared half the time. Hell, I was a little concerned at how well you seemed to be holding everything together. God knows, no one else I know would’ve been able to.”

  I give her a weak smile. I have no idea whether she means it or if she’s just trying to reassure me, but it’s nice to hear anyway.

  “And, if you want any help convincing this no-good deadbeat of a father to give you and Maddie a little support, you know where I am.” She says, supportive as always.

  I think of the premier business tycoon in the city and wince at her description.

  “He’s not exactly a deadbeat, Em - it’s not like I gave him a chance to help out.” I admit.

  Something that’s probably about to come back and bite me, in one way or another.

  “Well, okay then. But there must’ve been a reason you didn’t want to tell him, right? So I’ll kick him into shape in whatever way he needs.” She grins at me, and I laugh.

  I try to picture Alistair Sinclair going up against my friend, and have a disconcerting moment where I’m not actually sure who would come out on top.

  “Thanks, Em. But seriously, I’m not going to get my hopes up here. And it’s enough that you’ve given us a place to stay - I’ll try and get out of your hair—”

  She punches me lightly on the arm and scowls before I can finish the sentence, and I just smile. Then her expression softens.

  “It’s going to be okay, Leah. One way or another.”

  “I hope so, Em. I really do.”

  I murmur it, but I know she hears.

  And, strangely, I have to kick the nervous-anticipation that’s been building in me ever since I left Pittsburgh.