Pull

by Rachel Van Dyken

  Couldn’t he just be normal for one day, so the girl would follow me

  instead of him? Did I need to take off my shirt? Belt out a song? Get

  down on one knee? Oh shit, I just said knee, which meant proposal,

  which meant marriage. Why were my hands sweating? I glanced at

  Alyssa. Okay, it was more of a stare, a stalker stare that had me

  watching every breath that escaped her perfectly bow-shaped lips.

  God, I wanted to taste her again. Would I ever get enough? I

  adjusted in my seat and cursed the fact that I was a guy.

  Mrs. Miller came with our drinks. Alyssa closed her eyes

  and took a sip. Damn, what I wouldn’t do to be hot chocolate right

  now. Chocolate ran down the side of the white cup. Her pink

  tongue darted out and licked the liquid as she moaned to herself. I

  take everything back. I just want to be a cheap ass cup. That’s what

  I want to be.

  “I can tell taffy flavors by smelling the wrappers,” Alyssa

  said, interrupting my ceramic daydream.

  “No way!” Nat slapped her own leg. “I bet that comes in

  handy.”

  Alyssa rolled her eyes and took another sip of her hot

  chocolate. She needed to be done with that drink before I threw

  caution to the wind and mauled her. “Not really. I mean, I was able

  to guess what type of taffy Demetri was eating, but that’s it.”

  “Let me guess.” Alec leaned forward. “He makes you sniff

  all the wrappers after he eats them to see if you’re right?”

  “Every time.” Alyssa winked in my direction. My arousal

  just jumped into overdrive. Watching her joke with Nat and Alec,

  the two most important people in my life and then be so easy-going

  while doing it. I wanted her so bad. I wanted to throw the hot

  chocolate to the ground, jump onto her lap, and have my way with

  her.

  She sighed and tucked a piece of fallen hair behind her ear,

  giving me full view of her lips and a tiny drop of hot chocolate that

  was at the corner of her mouth.

  I needed a cold shower stat. Desperate, I looked around for

  something to distract me. Anything really. My eyes fell on Mrs.

  Miller kissing her husband. He swatted her ass. She wiggled in his

  arms and then did a dance I can only describe as something that

  should be outlawed in every state. And arousal gone. Good. That

  was easy. I cleared my throat and tried to relax. This was supposed

  to be fun. I was supposed to be bonding; instead I was resorting to

  staring at old people in order to keep my pants on. Hi, my name’s

  Mighty, and yes. Yes, I have so incredibly fallen.

  “So what else is going on? My mom says you’re leading

  group therapy?” Nat asked, sufficiently changing the subject,

  which I was thankful for, considering I had just thought of at least

  seven different ways I could kiss Alyssa’s neck. Apparently

  watching old people wasn’t as good of a distraction as I thought.

  “Yup.” I leaned back in the chair. The smell of steak filled

  the salty air. “I’ve only led group once. Actually our next meeting is

  in a few days I don’t know. I mean, at first I kept saying no. I hate

  to admit, I finally said yes, because I wanted to see Alyssa again,

  but then… I don’t know. I feel like a chick saying this, but I liked it.

  I mean, I liked feeling like I was helping people.”

  Nat shrugged. “Demetri, you’ve always been that way, you

  just never saw that about yourself.”

  “Probably because you were high most the time,” Alec

  interjected.

  “Thanks, man.” Always good to know I had his support. He

  smirked in my direction while I gave him the finger. I glanced back

  at Nat and took another sip of coffee. “Anyway, it’s been really

  good.”

  Alyssa was silent next to me. Crap, I had totally outed her in

  front of Nat and Alec. I reached for her hand. She squeezed it and

  then winked at me. I didn’t realize I’d been holding my breath until

  she did that. Relaxing, I leaned back again and listened to the

  waves.

  “I like it here.” Alyssa sighed. “It’s peaceful.”

  “No autographs,” Alec said.

  Nat laughed. “Or panty throwing.”

  “Or taffy jingles.” I lifted my cup into the air. “Cheers,

  everyone.”

  We all laughed and clinked glasses. After a few minutes of

  silence, where I’m happy to announce Justin Bieber and One

  Direction did not make a musical appearance, Mr. Miller came out

  with a huge platter of food.

  My stomach growled on cue.

  “Okay, boys, got some steak here for you. Rare, just how you

  like it. The missus cooked up some potatoes, carrots, and of course,

  chicken, just in case the girls don’t want red meat.” He set the

  platter down while Mrs. Miller came around and put the plates on

  the tables sitting next to each of our chairs.

  “Oh.” Mr. Miller held up his finger. “I almost forgot the

  applesauce, I’ll be right back.”

  “Applesauce?” Alyssa asked.

  “Yeah, for the steak and potatoes.” Duh, it was a staple! Like

  ketchup or mustard.

  “Not following.” Alyssa laughed and looked at Nat. “Is he

  being serious?”

  Nat shook her head. “Don’t knock it till you try it. I

  remember the first time Alec introduced me to applesauce at

  dinner. I thought he was crazy, but it’s pretty good.”

  Mr. Miller returned with a huge bowl of applesauce. I threw

  it onto my plate and gave Alyssa a wink.

  She scrunched her nose. “Are you really going to eat that

  with your meat and potatoes?”

  “It’s tradition.” I acted offended, but really I knew it wasn’t

  that normal for people to put applesauce with dinner. “Actually, I

  blame our Dutch friends from Canada. They used to always eat like

  that when we were kids, and it just kinda stuck.”

  “Hmm.” Alyssa took a spoonful of applesauce and tossed it

  onto her plate. “If I hate it, I’m blaming you guys.”

  “Fine.” I chuckled and cut up my meat.

  “No way!” Alyssa yelled. I dropped my fork.

  “What? What’s wrong?”

  Her eyes lit up with astonishment. “That’s amazing!”

  I took a large bite and shrugged. “So from here on out you

  should just take my word for it. Demetri is always right.”

  “And Demetri shouldn’t refer to himself in the third person.

  It’s weird,” Alec interjected.

  “Also true.” I thrust my fork into the air. “So what movie are

  we seeing?”

  “Romance,” Nat answered. “And before either one of you

  argue with me, just know that I had to go to not one, not two, but

  three movie premiers when I was with Alec, and they were all gory

  action movies that made me want to bang my head against my own

  hand.”

  “They were pretty rough,” Alec agreed. “But he’s a cool

  dude, so I wanted to support him.”

  “He?” Alyssa asked tentatively.

  Alec grinned. “Jamie Jaymeson. He’s from England. Girls

  love him, but he sports an American accent in all his action movies.
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  Anyways He’s good people.”

  Alyssa nodded. This was the part that made me nervous.

  Everyone knew who Jaymeson was. I mean, next to Robert Pattison

  he was the biggest thing to cross the Atlantic since Twilight. Did it

  freak her out to know we were all friends? That it was part of our

  world and would soon be part of hers too? It scared the hell out of

  me when I thought of merging my life with the one in Seaside. It

  didn’t fit. I wanted it to, but it was like two puzzle pieces that

  weren’t cut to go together, and I didn’t know how to fix it. I looked

  down at my food and sighed.

  We ate the rest of our food in silence. I was too hungry to

  talk, and then when I was finished I couldn’t help but stare at

  Alyssa. Everything about her was sensual. The way she ate bread

  was freaking sensual. I really needed to get a hold of myself if I was

  going to be in the same room with her without dying.

  Pretty sure I read somewhere that it could happen to a guy.

  It seriously felt like it now. I cleared my throat and looked away,

  even though all I wanted to do was be the creepy dude that

  watched her cut her meat.

  Yes. I wanted to watch her cut her meat. That was how hard

  I had fallen. I dug out a piece of taffy from my pocket and popped

  it into my mouth.

  Jack Daniels taffy sure did take the edge off. What I

  wouldn’t do for a joint.

  “Movie?” Alyssa asked once the plates were cleared.

  “Let’s do it,” I said, this time watching her as she stood and

  stretched her little arms above her head, giving me an amazing

  view of a tight little stomach. God, I was going to die this way.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Alyssa

  The drive to the small movie theatre wasn’t too bad. The

  closer we got to the narrow roads of Seaside, the easier it was for

  me to remain calm about the fact that for the first time in years I

  had traveled outside my tiny little hole of a town.

  My chest still hurt, but I swear it was like Demetri could tell

  when I would start to panic. He’d squeeze my hand, and then it

  was like by squeezing my hand, he somehow pushed the fear

  away.

  I sighed in relief the minute we rolled back into familiar

  territory.

  The movie theatre wasn’t crowded, which was a double

  bonus. I didn’t do crowds, and I knew Demetri and Alec would be

  irritated if there were lots of teen girls running around screaming

  their names and sobbing their eyes out.

  They were normal guys, right? I mean, it wasn’t as if

  anything about them was any different from any other guy in this

  world.

  I stole a glance at Demetri as he got out of the car and

  stretched his arms out in front of him. Seriously, how did that

  sweatshirt even fit him? It hugged every muscle in his arms. I had

  no idea guys even had that many muscles in their arms, and I used

  to hang out with football players all the time.

  He looked my way. I felt myself blush. Caught. Crap I was

  totally caught ogling the hottest guy I’ve ever seen. My mouth was

  even open. Perfect. He sauntered, yes, sauntered, as in slowly

  walked toward me with his hips swaying slightly back and forth. I

  looked down at the ground. My eyes were screaming at me to look

  at him, but I swear, in that moment I felt like if I did I would melt

  into a puddle, efficiently ruining one of the best days I’ve ever had.

  “Lyss? You okay?” He chuckled, tilting my chin toward him.

  His smile was my addiction; it was too bright, too beautiful not to

  respond to. His deep set dimples made his face light up into what I

  think every woman in my position would refer to as perfection.

  “Yup,” I croaked. “Just awesome.” I felt my eyebrows lift as

  if to prove how totally fine I was, when really on the inside my

  heart was racing like crazy.

  “Mmm…” His mouth descended.

  Forget what I said earlier about him being like any other

  guy.

  Other guys don’t kiss like that.

  What do they do in Hollywood? Give kissing lessons? Teach

  the art of seduction?

  His tongue tasted like the Jack Daniels taffy I had given him,

  sweet with a bit of salt. I opened my mouth to him as his warm

  hands braced my lower back, reaching lower than what was

  probably appropriate in public. He pushed me against the car and

  moaned into my mouth. I wrapped my arms around his neck and

  tried to press harder against him. It was as if I couldn’t get enough

  of him.

  “Dude,” Alec ground out. “We’re going to miss the movie.

  You can make out later. You’re going to kill her if you keep

  sweeping in like that with no warning whatsoever. She can barely

  stand straight!”

  Demetri pulled back chuckling. I was that girl. The girl that I

  swore I’d never be. The one that would literally stalk the object of

  her affection and never look back. His kiss did so many things to

  me. Things that, the minute Brady died, I thought too painful to

  experience again. I waited for the all too familiar stab in my chest.

  But it didn’t happen. Demetri held out his hand and smiled at me.

  Being with Demetri wasn’t the absence of pain. It was the

  added presence of peace, making it easier and easier for that little

  part of my heart to heal again.

  “Your call.” Demetri smirked, kissing me softly across the

  neck. “Movie or make out?”

  “No. No skipping out.” Alec approached us. “Don’t listen to

  him, Alyssa. He’s using his Jedi mind tricks on you. Look away!

  Look away!”

  I bit my lip and closed my eyes.

  “Or that,” Alec said.

  “Movie,” I squeaked. I hadn’t been to see in one in over a

  year. I just rented everything and sat alone at my house.

  No wonder I’d lost all my friends.

  Demetri grabbed my hand and led me into the theatre.

  It suddenly dawned on me how disappointed Brady would

  be in my behavior. He’d always said I would change the world one

  day with my constant cheerfulness and positive attitude.

  How did I go from that person — a person I don’t even

  remember being — to someone my parents put on suicide watch?

  The smell of buttered popcorn bombarded my senses as we

  made our way past the ticket counter. The boys wouldn’t let Nat or

  me pay. Which was weird for me. The only person I’d ever dated

  before was Brady. We were such good friends that I never wanted

  to take advantage of him. We always went Dutch. Until now, I’d

  never understood how good it felt to have someone treat me.

  My smile was huge. I couldn’t help it. Demetri walked up to

  the candy counter and scanned the glass. “One box of Swedish

  Fish, a bag of Gummi Worms, two bags of plain M&M’s and three

  sodas.”

  “Are we feeding an army?” I nudged him as he paid for the

  candy and pop.

  He grinned and nudged me back. “Nope, just a recovering

  drug addict with a very serious candy addiction.”

  “Thanks, bro.” Alec swiped t
he Swedish Fish away from

  Demetri and opened the bag, dangling a fish in front of Nat. She

  blushed and kissed him before tossing it into her mouth.

  “Never mind them. Swedish Fish are kinda their thing.”

  Demetri smirked and wrapped his arm around me.

  “And worms are yours?” I asked.

  “Worms, taffy, soda, Alyssa…” His voice trailed off.

  “Too bad I don’t fit in your pocket and give you a cavity.” I

  sighed.

  “You’re short enough to, let’s be honest. And while you

  couldn’t give me a cavity, you make me want to taste you every

  second I’m with you.” He licked his lips and grinned.

  “Oh.” I felt my cheeks heat as I looked away. Thankfully the

  movie theatre was somewhat dim, thanks to the crappy lights they

  used. Otherwise, I would have been embarrassed over the fact that

  I was blushing like a fool.

  We found the right theatre and went to the back. The

  previews started just as we sat down.

  I should have known my perfect day would end horribly.

  The screen went green, and then the first preview started.

  My chest tightened as I watched the preview unfold. The

  story so similar to my own. Girl and boy fall in love. Boy dies, but

  not before getting girl pregnant, and then she’s shunned by her

  friends until the new boy in school takes her under his wing.

  The new boy is a football player.

  I smiled at the relationship between the two.

  And then that guy gets in a horrible accident, leaving her

  wondering if she would be left alone again without her love. My

  breathing was erratic, that much I knew. I tried to close my eyes,

  but the screeching of metal hitting metal was suddenly too much

  for me.

  I ran out of the theatre, tears streaming down my face. Crap.

  Why did I have to cry now, when everything finally felt normal? As

  if it was going to be fine.

  I ran right into Sam, who was standing with Aaron. “Hey,

  you okay, Alyssa?”

  “Fine,” I mumbled then pushed past them. My vision

  blurred as I tried to get to the women’s restroom in time. I felt like I

  was going to pass out. The sound of the crash played over and over

  again in my head.

  The way I held his broken body, the way my hands looked

  so tiny trying to do compressions against his chest.

  But it wasn’t enough.

  It hadn’t been enough.