Touchdown Tony Crowne and the Mystery of the Missing Cheerleader

by Peter Guy George

  Her mother turned away from Bouguereau, chuckled and said, “Honey, I’ve been flying for years. I can fly in any weather; I just need to know where to land.” She snapped her fingers, looked about the room and muttered, “That reminds me, did I bring in those charts? I’m going to need them to see how to get to the other lake.”

  Tisha glanced around the kitchen and said, “I don’t see them. Let me look in the living room.” She scurried out, searched quickly and yelled back, “They aren’t in here! You must have left them in the plane.”

  Her mother let out an audible sigh, unlocked the door, stepped out onto the landing, turned and before closing the door announced, “All right. I’m going to get the charts. I’ll be right back. Make sure everything is packed and ready to go. Also, make sure you do your hypnosis thing with Ash what’s-her-name. I don’t want her having a hissy fit about flying. The last thing I need is a little girl screaming in the plane. And make doubly sure J.B. is tied up tight!”

  Walking into the kitchen, Tisha thought about securing Bouguereau’s and Ash’s hands once again, changed her mind and said, “You two look okay. I gotta pack my bag.” She turned and walked out of the kitchen, through the living room and into the bedroom.

  Bouguereau watched her enter the bedroom, turned to Ash and whispered, “Now is our time. You must listen very close to what I am about to say. Do you understand?”

  Ash looked at Bouguereau, swallowed hard and softly said, “Yes sir.”

  He smiled and said, “Good. Here we go.” He glanced toward the bedroom once more then riveted his gaze on Ash. “Dear, when I count to three you will no longer recognize the word dear as a command from Miss Brady nor from anyone else, forever. One. Two. Three.”

  Giggling, Ash said, “There was nothing to that!”

  “Oui, that was the easy part. Now, for the hard part. You have to make believe, pretend, that you are still hypnotized. When she comes back out, she will undoubtedly give you another command. You must look like this...” Bouguereau tilted his head, opened his mouth and stared vacantly for a second. “But only for a few moments, even better, repeat what she will say. It is very important that they think you are still hypnotized. When they take you down the stairs, as soon as you get to the bottom, kick Mademoiselle Brady’s shin as hard as you can and then run fast, fast as your tiny, little legs will carry you, in any direction. They keep saying the fog is heavy, so that will give you cover.”

  “But, what about you? I don’t want to go without you!” Ash’s eyes teared up at the thought of leaving her new friend behind.

  “Ma chérie, I shall be all right,” he whispered, smiled and looked at her like she was his granddaughter. “You don’t get as old as me without knowing a few tricks, plus, I still have my trusty cane.” He saw Tisha exiting the bedroom, winked at Ash and said, “Ssh, she is returning. Remember the plan!”

  Lugging her suitcase into the living room, Tisha plopped it onto the floor, draped her overcoat onto it and looked for anything else to take with her. Satisfied that she had everything, she bustled into the kitchen, crouched down and untied Ash’s legs from the chair. Staying eye level with Ash, she pointed her finger at her and said, “Dear, you will be so happy about going on a trip. You love flying. You love my mother and you love me.” Tisha looked deep into her eyes.

  Ash tilted her head like Bouguereau, let her mouth drop open, stared at Tisha without looking at her and repeated in a monotone voice, “You’re right. You’re right. I love your mother and you. I am happy. I love to fly, really I do.” She closed her eyes for a second, then opened them quickly, bounced on her chair and shouted, “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!”

  Ah! Bouguereau thought, she is a natural actress. Que oui! You betcha!

  Bouguereau’s happiness was short-lived, however, as Tisha’s mother stomped up the stairs, threw open the door and slammed it shut several times, yelling and screaming louder with each successive slam.

  “Mother! What is wrong!”

  “Look! Look at these charts, they’re all wet and probably ruined!” She threw the chart binder on the floor and it made a little squish sound as it bounced off the carpet. She put her hand up to her chin, paced back and forth and glanced at the watch on her wrist. We’ve got to try to dry these charts out. Is there a blow dryer here?”

  Tisha thought for a moment and said, “Yes! I saw one in the bathroom.” Her mother cleared the kitchen table and spread out the Hideaway Lake chart while Tisha went to get the blow dryer.

  “Oh, this is so soaked! I am furious!” she growled.

  Rushing back in, Tisha plugged the blow dryer into the electrical socket, turned it on to ‘High’ and handed it to her mother.

  “What is this? A travel dryer? This will take forever!” Her mother yelled above the din of the blowing air. For a good five minutes she passed the blow dryer over and across the chart, checking her watch several times as well. Shaking her head back and forth, she moaned, “I give up. This is not getting dry and I still can’t read it! We have to go, now! Did you pack the money?”

  “Yes, it’s in my suitcase.”

  “Is the annoying, little brat hypnotized?”

  “Yes, she’s all set.”

  Ash bounced up and down in her seat, “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!”

  Tisha’s mother rolled her eyes and said, “Oh, I don’t know what’s worse: the squirt with an attitude or the cheerleader with no brains.” She drew a deep breath, exhaled, turned to Tisha and said, “Okay, we have to get out of here. I’ll grab the suitcase, you grab little Miss Sunshine—”

  In an effort to stall and buy time in the hopes the police will arrive soon, Bouguereau interrupted, “Madame, surely you realize how dangerous this plan is. How will you find this...this...what was the name of the lake?”

  In a voice melting with sarcasm Tisha’s mother set the suitcase down, tapped her finger on the tip of Bouguereau’s nose and said, “Oh, Boogie-Woogie, I never told you the name of the other lake. If, by some miracle you should escape, I’m not going to tell you where we are going!” She smiled wickedly and added, “I will follow up to see if the boys in blue found you in time or not. If they did, oh well. If they didn’t, rest in peace Bouguereau!”

  He glared at her with unwavering eyes and said, “You, Madame, are one of the most vile creatures I have ever had the displeasure of meeting!”

  Tisha grabbed Ash by the elbow, headed for the door and said, “Come on, Mother. We need to leave. Remember the timetable?”

  “Yes, yes, yes. I just needed to get one last little jab at my old friend. Ah, I feel so much better now.” Picking up the suitcase and walking out the door, she turned and said, “Turn out the light, Tisha, he won’t need it and we don’t want anyone getting suspicious since Wendell What’s-his-face isn’t in town.”

  With her hand on the light switch, Tisha looked back at Bouguereau and said, “Buh, bye Boogs. I’ll be thinking about ya, not! Ha, ha!” She flipped the switch and when she closed the door the room immediately became pitch black. Bouguereau, however, did not notice the absence of light. He was smiling and thinking of the surprise Tisha and her mother would receive at the bottom of the stairs.

  Chapter 30- The Escape

  “What do we do now, Tony?” Judd asked, as he helped Tony off the wing of the seaplane and onto the dock.

  “That was stupid! Stupid, stupid, stupid!” Tony said in a low voice. “I had four bars without standing up! Arrgh!”

  “There ain’t nuthin’ you can do about it now.” Judd pleaded. “We just gotta save Ash and Detective Boognatowski ourselves! Think, Tony, think!”

  “Okay, okay. I see your point. I need to concentrate.” Tony closed his eyes, breathed in through his nose and exhaled. Tony’s mind raced with images of Ash, Bouguereau, Tisha, her mother, the boathouse—the boathouse!” I completely forgot about the boathouse, Judd! There are interior stairs that go from the boat slip up to the apartment. The back door! C’mon, maybe we can surprise them!”


  Running down the dock and then along the seawall to the boat house, Tony and Judd came up to the outside boat-level door, stopped and caught their breath. Tony turned to Curly, gave him the signal to stay and Curly obediently laid down, but remained in an alert position.

  Turning the knob, Tony was surprised that it was unlocked and made a thumbs-up gesture to Judd. They both slipped inside the door and were met with total darkness. Tony had his pen light ready, clicked it on and whispered, “Watch your step, there’s a bunch of ropes and other stuff scattered on the floor.” Hearing muffled voices filtering down from the apartment; they crept up the carpeted staircase and sat down on the top step. Light from the kitchen streamed out from a tiny gap beneath the door and Tony put his head on the floor in an effort to see how many people were inside. All he could see were feet, but that was enough.

  He raised his head back up, shined the light on himself and mouthed into Judd’s ear in the barest of whispers, “There are only four people in there. Ash and Bouguereau are sitting and I think they are tied up. Miss Brady and her mother are walking around. I didn’t hear or see anyone else.”

  Judd nodded his head okay, and asked, “So what are we gonna—”

  “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!” Ash yelled as she bounced up and down in her seat.

  Judd stuck his head on the floor and peered in through the gap. He saw Tisha remove the last rope from Ash’s legs, lifted his head and whispered, “They’re gettin’ ready to go out the door. I ain’t gonna let them put Ash on that arrowplane!”

  Before Tony could react, Judd swiped the pen light from his hands, bounded down the staircase, picked up a coil of boat rope, turned and tossed the pen light back to Tony. “Shine it so I can get out,” he said in a hushed voice.

  Knowing he couldn’t say anything without Tisha or her mother overhearing, Tony lit up the boat slip. Judd, with a serious look on his face, saluted Tony, slipped out the door and disappeared into the fog.

  Tony shook his head in frustration then looked again through the gap. He heard Tisha laugh, saw the light go off in the kitchen and the door slam shut. Got to get to Bouguereau, he thought as he got up on his feet and twisted the door knob.

  “Who is there? Is that you Tony?” Bouguereau asked as he saw the door open and a beam of light cascade onto the floor and then directly into his eyes. His eyes were barely adjusted to the darkness and now the light shining into his face caused more impairment. He squinted with one eye shut and the other eye open and said, “Please, take the light from my face.”

  “Oh, sorry Detective! Yeah, it’s me, Tony. Let me turn on the kitchen light—”

  “No, no! We do not want them to know that something is different up here. Please, go to the door quickly; open it a little bit, so we can hear. Hurry!”

  Tony sprang to the front door and opened it.

  THUD!

  “OW! Why you little punk!”

  THUD!

  “OW! Stop it! Come back here! DEAR! Come back here, NOW! Oh, this hurts so much! DEAR! I command you to come back here! Where are you? Why aren’t you answering? Mother! Where are you? Help me—”

  THWACK!

  Shining his pen light back into the kitchen, Tony turned and asked, “What’s going on down there?”

  Chuckling uncontrollably which shook his body all over, Bouguereau took a second to gather himself and said, “Ah! That was your little friend, Miss Richardson! I de-hypnotized her, gave her instructions to kick Miss Brady on the shin and then to run quickly away. She must have kicked her twice for good measure! Good for her! Que oui!”

  “Wait a minute. There were two thuds and a thwack.” Tony’s eyes lit up and he added, “I betcha that thwack was Judd. He went back outside with a rope to save Ash.”

  Regaining his serious voice, Bouguereau said, “Tony, we must hurry. Untie me, please. Better yet, take my cane and press the button under the handle. That will release a hidden sword. It is very sharp, so be careful.”

  Reaching down and grabbing his cane, Tony pressed the button, unsheathed the shiny sword and held it up in front of him. “Wow! You’re full of surprises Detective Bouguereau. I never would have guessed—”

  THUMP, THUMP, THUMP, THUMP.

  “Someone is returning. Tony, get behind the door!”

  THUMP,THUMP, THUMP, THUMP.

  Running to the door, Tony stood behind it and raised the sword above his head. The door knob turned back and forth, rattling a little bit. Tony’s breathing became shallow and his muscles tensed.

  The door creaked open, a figure stuck their head inside and whispered, “Tony! Are you in there? Detective Boo-hoo-hoo? Hello-o-o-o?”

  Tony sighed, relaxed his muscles, brought the sword down and whispered back, “Judd! It’s me. What happened!”

  Judd stepped inside and sheepishly said, “I kinda got carried away and took care of Miss Brady.”

  “Wow, did you hit her with something? I heard a big thwack sound.”

  “Oh no, I wouldn’t punch a lady, Tony. You know that! But I got so wound up, when Ash kicked her for the second time, that I ran kinda hard and I kinda, sorta tackled her. I think I knocked a little wind outta her, Tony, she acted just like you did when you got tackled today. I told her I was sorry and everythin’—”

  “Where is she now?” Bouguereau interrupted.

  “Well, after I tackled her, I sat her up and she got her wind back quick and I asked her if she was okay and she said yes and I said good and I said you ain’t gonna like this and I roped her like a calf and set her behind a big ol’ bush. She said she was gonna yell for her mommy and I said if you yell, I’m gonna take off one of my stinky ol’ socks and put it in your mouth.” Judd took a deep breath and continued, “She quieted down real ladylike, so I ran up the stairs lookin’ for you two.”

  “And where is Mademoiselle Richardson?”

  “You mean, Ash? I dunno. She kicked Miss Brady and then ran. I don’t think she saw me at all. I’m thinkin’ she ran toward the house, but I couldn’t really tell in all this fog.”

  “Did you see her mother?”

  “When I was hidin’, I let her pass ‘cause Ash wasn’t with her. After I tied up Miss Brady and was about to come up the stairs, I think I heard her walking down the dock. She walks kinda loud, you know?”

  “Tony, we no longer need worry about the lights. Turn on the kitchen light and use the sword to release me. We must stop Mademoiselle Brady’s mother from flying away!”

  Flicking the light switch and digging into his pocket, Tony said, “I don’t think we have to worry about her flying away.” Opening his hand and smiling, he revealed the ignition key to the seaplane. “I took it out when we were looking for the charts!”

  “Ah, Tony you are a smart boy, but unfortunately planes are easy to steal without the ignition key. She has been flying for a long time. She will know what wires to cross to start the plane. It will delay her, but we need to get down there now!”

  “Yes, sir!” Tony cut through the ropes with the sword and Bouguereau was standing up and massaging his wrists in a matter of seconds.

  Chapter 31- The Confrontation

  “Stay behind me! We do not know if she is armed or not!” Bouguereau ordered as they ran down the dock. When the seaplane emerged from the fog, Bouguereau stopped, turned and put his finger up to his lips to Tony and Judd. Quietly, they approached the seaplane and heard muffled screams coming from it.

  “What is she doing?” Tony whispered to Bouguereau.

  “She undoubtedly discovered the missing keys.” Bouguereau chuckled. He walked up to the side of the seaplane and tapped on the window with the titanium knob of his cane. “Madame, you are through!” He grabbed the door handle and yanked it open. “Come out with your hands in the air!”

  With a surprised look on her face, Tisha’s mother scanned their faces, shut her eyes and dropped her head onto her chest as her body sank in resignation. Looking up, she asked softly, “Who took my keys? You two little fellas? Why, why d
id you that?” She scrunched up her face in bewilderment and asked, “Who are you?”

  “Nevermind all of your questions. You need to exit the plane, now!”

  “Oh, all right, Boogieman.” She took a deep breath, exhaled and said, “I give up. I am so tired I could sleep for days. I’m kind of glad you caught me, Boogie. I don’t think I could have flown in this weather after all.” Reaching for the door to help her get out, she stopped and said, “I don’t suppose I could interest you in splitting that money in the suitcase, say fifty-fifty?”

  Bouguereau’s face did not change.

  “Or even, sixty-forty? Okay, okay. This is my rock bottom offer. How about seventy-thirty?”

  He still stared at her.

  “Oh, come on, Boog! She cajoled. “You need some extra moolah for your retirement. Think about it, hmm? Seventy-thousand dollars! It’s right here!” She tapped the suitcase sitting behind her seat.

  “Madame, are you not forgetting someone?” Bouguereau asked with an innocent look.

  She put her hand up to her chest and just as innocently said, “Oh, who?”

  A shrill voice in the distance called out, “Mother! I can hear every word! How dare you try to skip out on me! If I wasn’t tied up, I’d... I’d... oh, I don’t know what I’d do, but I’d do something!”

  Shaking her head and rolling her eyes, Tisha’s mother laughed and said, “Do you see what I have to put up with? I thought I taught her all the tricks of the trade, but did she listen? Oh, no! She can’t even hypnotize a little girl. She messed that up. She messed up the marriage with Wendell What’s-his-face and cost me big bucks. This was a long-term con job, I sank a lot of my money into this and she botched it up!” She pointed her finger at Bouguereau and added, “The last straw was that little brat kicking her and escaping. I decided right then and there that our professional partnership had ended. Oh sure, she’ll still be my little girl. I’ll be sure to write and visit her in whatever prison you stick her into.”

  “Madame, please come out of the plane.”