A Wicked Liaison

by Christine Merrill

  ‘And because you allow me a degree of intimacy, for which I am most grateful…’ he looked up and smiled at her and there was a wicked glint in his eye that made her heart beat faster ‘…I do not assume that I can do as I please with you. If ever I make a suggestion that offends you, you have but to tell me to stop. I am yours to command.’

  And thoughts appeared of what she wished to command him to do. They had nothing to do with stopping his current behaviour or being any less wicked in her presence. Quite the contrary. She blushed. ‘No. It is quite all right. You have done nothing to offend me. I am…’ She whispered the next words, ‘I fear I am enjoying it too much.’

  He whispered back to her. ‘You have nothing to fear. As I told you the first night, your secrets are safe with me. All of your secrets. But if you enjoy my company so much, why were you not at home, when I called?’

  ‘What we spoke of last night…I do not know if I can go through with it. It seemed so right, at the time. But it is foolish of me to make promises in the moonlight that I am afraid to keep in daylight.’

  ‘I see.’ He reached out and gently touched her arm. ‘And why were you crying? This is the second time that I have come upon you and found you in tears. I do not believe you gave me a clear indication of the problem on that night, either. What is it that distresses you so?’

  ‘I thought I informed you then that it was none of your concern.’

  ‘But we hardly knew each other, then. I dare say we are much closer now. One might say, thick as thieves.’ He considered. ‘Although for the most part, I have not found thieves to be much in each other’s confidence.’

  ‘Then why should I trust you?’

  ‘Because I care enough to ask, and sincerely hope that the problem will be something I can aid you in. You must admit, I have helped you before.’

  She laughed through her tears. ‘It is not so easy, this time, I fear. You tempt me. And it is hard to resist you. But the gentleman you discovered me with in the library? I had hopes…’ She left the sentence unfinished.

  Tony stiffened next to her. ‘I see. And does the gentleman reciprocate your feelings?’

  She blinked away the tears. ‘I did not claim to have feelings. It would be most insensible of me, at my age, to base everything on “feelings.” Instead, I had hopes.’

  ‘Oh,’ he said, clearly not understanding at all.

  ‘He is a gentleman, his income is not as great as my late husband’s nor his estates as fine, nor his title as prestigious. But, truly, I do not expect to find the equal of Robert. My first marriage was extremely fortunate in that regard. Lord Endsted was more than rich enough. And he seemed interested. Of course, they all seem interested, at first.’

  ‘I should think that they would be. You are a charming and attractive woman, your Grace. Any man would be honoured to have your attention.’ He opened his mouth, ready to say more, then stopped and looked at her. ‘But I take it, the man of your choosing is not among them?’

  She shook her head. ‘As I said before, this is not so much about what I choose, or what I feel. I would have been more than willing, should he have offered, or any of the others. It would have been most foolish of me to say nay if he’d have offered matrimony. But he saw me with you, and then Barton was here, when we returned. And he now thinks me inappropriate company.’

  Anthony exploded with an oath. ‘He does not want you because other men find you attractive? Then the man is a jealous fool. Or blind. I will find him and call him out.’

  ‘Don’t be absurd.’ She laid a hand on his arm. ‘He offended me, not you. And if you wish to call out every gentleman who has disappointed me, then I would have to make you a rather long list. I expect it to grow even longer, ere I find a man who will do otherwise. You came upon me in a low mood, that is all. I had not expected, at thirty, to be so thoroughly on the shelf with regard to matrimony. And I am not yet to the point where I find the other suggestions to be flattering.’

  ‘I should think not,’ he responded indignantly. ‘The cheek of these men. I had thought that one such as yourself, fair as any of the young ladies of the ton, but with grace and poise, with wit as well as intelligence…’ He showed signs of continuing, and then looked down. ‘I would have thought that one such as you would have no end of suitors.’

  ‘I have had suitors enough.’ She smiled sadly. ‘But they are rarely seeking a wife. I suppose it is a comfort to know that men still find me desirable.’

  ‘Oh, I must say yes, you are very much that. But that they would be so coarse as to suggest…’

  She stared at him. ‘You yourself had admitted that you would have me, should I be so inclined. I fail to see the source of your indignation on my behalf.’

  ‘But that is before I realised that you would settle for nothing less than marriage.’ He dropped to his knees before her. ‘I am ever your servant, your Grace. You would do me a great honour, should you give me your hand, and I would endeavour to keep you in comfort and safety for the rest of your days.’

  She pulled her hand from his grasp. ‘And now you are taunting me with my foolishness.’

  ‘I assure you, I am not. If you cannot find another who suits you, and do not wish to accept any of the other base offers made to you, then have me.’

  ‘Most certainly not.’ She had blurted out the words before she could stop to think how they might sound.

  He looked up at her, eyes glazed with shock, and skin white, but with a streak of colour on each cheek as though she had slapped him hard. ‘May I ask why?’

  ‘I should think that would be obvious.’

  His voice was steady, but strangely distant. ‘Not to me.’

  She ducked her head so that he might not see the fear in her eyes. ‘We hardly know each other.’

  ‘I doubt you knew the other gentlemen so well as you thought, if you were surprised when none of them offered. So that is not the real reason, is it?’

  ‘All right. If you insist.’ She steeled herself and said the words, ‘You are a criminal. How could you expect me to accept that fact, and bind myself to you? You would ask me to live in comfort off ill-gotten gains and feel no guilt about it?’

  He rose from his knees and dropped back into the seat beside her. There was a flash of pain in his eyes, but when he spoke, his colour was returning to normal and his voice was light, albeit with a slight edge of sarcasm. ‘Women I have supported in the past took care not to know where the money came from. They assumed, correctly, that someone would take care of them, and shield them from the unpleasantness of finances.’ He looked at her. ‘Just as I assumed that, since you took the first money, and had no problem with the theft of the deed, you would not be bothered with the rest.’

  ‘You assumed incorrectly. I take pride in knowing the details of my finances, although I cannot say I’ve done a very good job with them. And I am tired of men who promise to be a shield against unpleasantness, since unpleasantness has managed to find me in any case.’

  ‘You would not have the details of it rubbed under your nose. I do not entertain my fence at my rooms. I keep my private life very much removed from my professional one.’

  ‘Or you will until such time as you are caught and hanged. Then you will drag those around you to disgrace as well.’

  The words pained him, and his voice was quiet when he responded. ‘It is not as if I have never considered the fact. And I have taken great care not to be caught. Another reason I never married, I think.’

  ‘It was probably wise of you. I cannot imagine a crueller fate for a woman than to know such a thing about her husband and to live in fear of his discovery. I could not bear it.’

  A shadow passed over his face again. ‘Thank you for making your opinions clear on the matter. I intended no disrespect. I only wished to offer you a solution to a problem that seems to weigh most heavily upon you. The offer stands, of course, for I doubt that my attraction for you will wane. But I will not break my heart over your refusal, since I suspect there is
nothing to be done to change your low opinion of me.’ His tone was light, and he seemed to have returned to normal, but she could tell he did not speak the whole truth.

  ‘Thank you for your understanding.’

  ‘And thank you for your honesty.’ There was more than a touch of bitterness in the word. ‘And tell me, does your refusal of my more noble offer extend to my friendship as well?’

  ‘No.’ Her voice was small and unsteady.

  ‘Because I will not trouble you with my presence again, if you find my criminality so offensive.’ She had hurt him again, and she felt her resolve wavering. But she could not very well marry him, just to spare his feelings. Why could he not understand that one of them must hurt, no matter what path she chose?

  She reached out to take his hand again. ‘No. Please, do not forsake me. I cannot help the way I feel. I wish I could, in so many ways, and yet, I cannot. I know I cannot marry you. But neither am I able to let you go. And I do not know what I am to do, in either case. It hurts me to think of it, just as it hurt to say it aloud. And that is why I was crying.’

  He laid his other hand over hers and squeezed it tightly. And his smile was sad, but it was a real smile. ‘That is all right. I did not think you would say yes, and yet I felt moved to ask. I do not wish to make you cry, and am sorry to have done so. And truly, I have no desire to leave you and will not unless you send me away.’

  He sighed. ‘So let us not think overlong on the details of this, since they pain us both. Until such time as you say otherwise, I am yours to command, your Grace, and that should be more than enough to be happy on, I think.’ And he pulled her close to him, so that she could lay her head on his shoulder, and rocked her in his arms until she dozed.

  When she awoke, he was gone.

  Chapter Eleven

  She returned to the house, lightheaded from her nap in the sunlight and unsure of her emotions. The crying had left her with a megrim that the nap had only partly soothed.

  But it had been so restful, leaning against Tony, that she had quite forgotten what a bad idea it was to do so. And strange that he’d even allowed it. He had offered. She had refused. Afterwards, one of them should have slunk away in embarrassment, to nurse their wounds in private.

  But he had been very accepting of her refusal, even though she could tell he was hurt. It would have been much easier if he had raged and stormed and then left her in peace. If he had abandoned her, she might have begun the difficult process of forgetting him, rather than closing her eyes and leaning into his shoulder, losing herself in a dream of what it might be like if they were two different people and she could say yes to him.

  It could not have hurt him too deeply, then. It was a blow to the ego, of course. No man wanted to be told that he was not good enough to be marriage material. But it must not have been a blow to the heart. If it had been a mortal wound, he would not have recovered so quickly. It might actually have been the answer he wanted to hear, since he had done his best to help her, but had been able to keep his heart free, in case he ever managed to succeed with his dream woman.

  All the more reason not to marry him. Although he might want her, he did not truly love her. Their marriage might have been a very workable relationship, if she had had the sense not to fall in love with him before he had asked. But if she had agreed to marry him because she loved him, she could see a grim future ahead. Once he had her, his ardour would cool and he would lose interest. And she would sit like the fool she was, suffering with every small indifference and worrying the night away that he would be captured and killed, or, worse yet, unfaithful.

  He would be baffled by her behaviour, since he had given her no reason for it. He had made no grand promises of undying faithfulness before the marriage. Why should she expect them after?

  So, it was all for the best. As long as she ignored the emptiness she felt, after denying him.

  ‘Your Grace.’ Susan rushed to her side, as she entered the house, trying to stop her as she walked down the corridor. ‘I am sorry. I tried. But his foot was in the door. And when I tried to close it, he pushed me and I fell. And I told him you were not at home, but he would not go away.’

  The words were overwhelming, and made no sense, but Constance knew, before she opened the door to her sitting room, who she would find there.

  Barton was smiling the same placid smile he always did when dealing with her, as though common sense and reason would eventually lead her to do the unspeakable. He did not rise as she entered, remaining relaxed and in control. ‘You ignored my note to you.’

  ‘Yes, I did,’ she responded. ‘And my servants were instructed not to open the door for you. You cannot continue to force your way into my home, Lord Barton.’

  ‘Your home.’ When he said it, it was no longer a question. He must know that she’d got the deed.

  She pretended to ignore the fact. ‘I will have no more of these nonsensical threats of yours. I have no intention of becoming your mistress. And I do not acknowledge your ownership of my home. If you think you have a case, then take me to court, and prove that you own this house.’

  He laughed. ‘You are beautiful, Constance, and more clever than I gave you credit for. I know you have taken the deed. I don’t suppose you would care to enlighten me on how that might have happened. I suspect that the one who helped you might have another motive to gain entry to my house. And I would like a word with him.’

  ‘I do not know what you are talking about.’

  ‘Of course you don’t, darling. To hear you, I am almost convinced. I doubt that you have the necessary skills to achieve this yourself. I know you had help. So I will watch you closely, and watch the men who watch you, until I see who your favourite shall be. And when I have discovered him, I will deal with him as he deserves.’

  ‘My favourite? I have no favourite.’

  ‘Not that I have noticed. But if you do not, you soon shall. The man that got the deed to your house made you work for it, I’ll wager, just as I intend to.’

  She almost responded that Tony had been different, before she could help herself.

  He smiled as he saw the look in her eyes. ‘You almost told me. But no matter. You will slip eventually. With a word. A glance. A chance meeting that is no chance. I will find him, and punish him. If it matters to you, you might warn him that I wish him to stay out of my business and that if he thinks he can take you from me, he is sadly mistaken.’ He looked up at her and reached into his pocket, producing a packet of papers. ‘I took the liberty of going up to your room as you slept in the garden, and retrieving what he took from me. And thus, we are back to where we started. You owed me then, and you owe me now.’

  ‘You lie.’ She reached to snatch it from his hand, and it disappeared again, inside his coat.

  ‘It was in the drawer of the night table, in your room. It is no trouble, getting by your servants, Constance. Freddy has kept anyone of value in his service. And you, with your soft heart, have employed his cast-offs. You are left with foolish girls and old men. It did not take more than a single blow to dispense with the few that stood in my way.’

  ‘You struck my servants?’ she said, with horror.

  ‘I taught them who the master of this house is to be. I doubt I will have to teach them twice.’

  ‘You had no right. They were doing their duty to me. You were trying to enter my room without permission.’

  ‘Then you had best give them permission to obey me, or next time I will strike them harder.’

  ‘If you must hit anyone, then hit the person who gave them the command.’ She stood in front of him, daring him to raise his hand to her.

  ‘And what good would that do, other than to mark that which I wish to remain unblemished? You are much more likely to obey me to save others, than you would to save yourself. Allow me to demonstrate. Call your maid into the room.’

  ‘I most certainly will not.’

  He got up, stepped out into the hall and said, ‘Susan, come here, please. Your m
istress needs you.’

  ‘I do not!’ But even as she said it, the girl had obeyed the first command, and come to the door of the sitting room. Barton seized her by the wrist and hauled her into the room, closing the door behind her.

  Susan struggled, but was no match for him and he pulled her arm until her hand was held high above the flame of a candle. ‘At this height, she barely feels the heat.’ He pulled her arm lower, and the maid closed her eyes. ‘At this height, she is beginning to feel some discomfort. It is very warm on the skin, is it not? Answer me, Susan.’

  The girl nodded.

  He looked again at Constance. ‘Any lower, and the flesh will burn. Would you like me to demonstrate, or are you willing to see the value of co-operation?’

  ‘You cannot do this. I will call the Runners.’

  ‘Afterwards, perhaps. And what good will it do poor Susan then? If you try to leave the room, I will have cooked the flesh of her hand before you can return with help.’

  ‘Let her go.’

  ‘Give me the key to this house.’

  Constance saw the resolve in his eyes and hurried to her desk, fumbling in the drawer for a spare key. Her hand trembled as she handed it to him.

  He released the maid. ‘Very good. We have an understanding. And if you have a notion to bar the door against me or change the locks, know that the next time I come, I shall bring servants of my own, and it will go worse for all inside.’

  He smiled thoughtfully. ‘And now, let us return to the matter of your lover, the thief. He is your lover, is he not? I suspect you traded that lovely body of yours for his assistance. You should not have done that, for you knew to whom you belonged when you went to him.’