The Debt
Page 7
I set the flashlight on the nightstand and let it reflect off the wall. It was enough to fill the room, and with that, I noticed her fingers worrying the hem of her jeans.
“Give it a second,” I said. “The generator will kick on.”
Without fail, I checked the generator outside the garage on the first of every month to make sure it was fueled. During a storm freshman year, we lost power for two days, which meant the house was without the security system for just as long. We got by just fine at Tom’s house, but Hadley didn’t sleep at all. She was agitated and anxious all night as Tom and I stayed up to watch movies with her as a means of distraction. Following that episode, I made the investment in a generator. It was enough to power the security alarm and floodlights on each corner of the exterior, plus connect the fridge and A/C.
Just as it was supposed to, three beeps sounded from downstairs, indicating that the keypad in the foyer had reset itself.
“See? No worries.”
Hadley looked up and nodded. She was doing her best to fake it. “Thank you. For remembering.”
“It’s my job.”
Hadley was in the unenviable position to sort of need me. The least I could do was take my responsibilities seriously.
“Right.” She looked out the window being pelted by rain.
“We should probably go ahead and lock up.”
It was too early to contemplate sleeping, but the sooner we got it over with, the sooner she’d relax.
“Yeah.”
Her mood had deteriorated. For the last hour, everything had been as close to perfect as I could hope for. I didn’t want to let this little hiccup ruin her evening, but I didn’t know what to do about it.
I held the flashlight as Hadley led the way to her room. She stopped in her bathroom to light a candle and set it in front of the mirror. Enough to brighten her bedroom while the door was open.
In precise order, Hadley performed her ritual through her room and then downstairs. I gave her a bit of space while I found candles to light and leave burning in the kitchen and living room. The orange glow bounced off the windows and shiny appliances, filling the open floor plan with soft light.
After setting the alarm, Hadley stood looking out the front windows.
“All good?” I asked.
“Yep. So...I guess I’ll get ready for bed.”
“I downloaded some new music on my laptop. We could go back upstairs and listen to that.”
I’d missed Punky’s company. We hadn’t sat and listened to music together in a long time. I wanted to get that feeling back.
“Or a movie,” I offered. “I have a few on my hard drive, but we could pick a DVD if you want.”
“Yeah, okay.”
Hadley’s expression perked up, so I assumed I’d done something right.
“I want to change clothes and stuff. You pick something,” she said, “and I’ll be there in a minute.”
I handed Hadley the flashlight to find her way up the stairs and went into the living room to look through the DVDs. Best to err on the side of levity, so I picked out a few comedies to choose from. I grabbed one of the candles from the coffee table, made sure that the others downstairs wouldn’t ruin any surfaces or burn down the house, and then went back to my room.
Hadley’s door was closed, so I set the candle down and quickly pulled off my jeans to put on a more comfortable pair of lounge pants. I sat back against the headboard and waited for the laptop to boot up. Punky appeared at the threshold of my bedroom wearing my sweatshirt, which hung midway down her slender thighs. She looked adorable.
“What?” Hadley pulled her long hair out of the neck of the sweatshirt and came toward the bed.
I shrugged. “Come take a look at your options.”
“You were supposed to pick.”
“You know how bad I am at following instructions. I narrowed the field. Lady’s choice.”
“That one.” She pointed at one of the DVDs laid out on the nightstand.
I liked that about Punky. She was decisive. And she had great fucking taste in movies.
“I haven’t watched Four Rooms in years.” I popped it out of the case and slid the DVD into my laptop.
Hadley crawled up on the bed next to me. She rearranged the pillows behind her until she was comfortable while I set the laptop down between our legs and turned the volume up as loud as it would go.
“Homecoming, freshman year of high school,” Hadley said, pointing out the last time we’d watched this movie together. “I didn’t want to get dressed up—”
“And you were mortified at the idea of dancing—”
“So you rented a limo, picked me up at Tom’s in a tux, and brought us back here.”
“I’ll take Tarantino over high school rites of passage any day. But you did dance.”
“And you’ve been sworn to secrecy about that,” Punky reminded me with a potent glare.
I’d taken requests at the piano at her insistence. To fit the occasion, I’d opted out of my classical repertoire in favor of Billy Joel and Elton John. Punky could get down to some “Uptown Girl” as long as no one else was watching.
“On my honor as a gentleman, your secret is safe with me.”
“Fuck off and start the movie, MacKay.”
Through the opening credits, Hadley adjusted her position against the headboard and messed with the pillows behind her.
“Can you see okay?” I tilted the screen in her direction.
She shifted again, closer to my side.
Oh, fuck it. It wouldn’t be the first time Hadley had punched me in the nuts. Man up, MacKay.
“Come here.” I put my arm over the back of her pillows and slid her until she was leaning against my shoulder. “There. Better?”
For the viewing vantage point. That was all.
“Yeah,” Hadley answered as she dropped her head against my chest. “Better.”
* * *
Her fingers dug into my shoulder and nails lightly scratched down my back. I groaned, thrusting deeper. So fucking tight, her body clenched around my cock, pulling me inside. With my weight leaning on my forearms on either side of her head, my tongue laved at one pink nipple. She whimpered, arching her back to push her tits in my face. I bit down, tugging the erect tip between my teeth.
“Fuck, Josh.”
I moved one hand between us as I sat back on my heels, dragging her hips up with me to slide deeper, feeling her stretch around me. She moaned an almost painful sound. Watching her, I played with her clit. Her entire body convulsed as my thumb pressed harder.
Around my hips, her thighs trembled. She sucked her bottom lip between her teeth and bit down. I watched, fascinated with the sight of my dick disappearing inside her. It felt too good. So tight. So warm. I grabbed on to both of her hips, thrusting up and embedding myself deeply as she climaxed. I spilled inside her a moment later, my orgasm clenching every muscle.
I couldn’t hold myself upright anymore and collapsed on top of her. Her fingers slid up and down my spine as I kissed along her collarbone and up the side of her neck, nipping at her warm flesh along the way.
“I love you, Punky.”
“I like you pretty well, too.”
I raised my head to glare at Hadley. She wore a cocky smirk. Narrowing my eyes, I thrust inside her.
“‘Like’?”
“Like a lot,” she said with a playful smile.
Bad Hadley.
“Bend over, naughty girl. I’m going to fuck you till you love me.”
I woke up hard, sweating, with my hand fisted around my cock. I’d known it was a dream even while the fantasy played out in my sleep, but that didn’t lessen the disappointment when my eyes finally opened to confirm that I was alone. It was rare that I had a dream about Hadley that didn’t end in a panic attack. When I did, it was all the more damaging. Wishful thinking only made reality suck that much worse.
I blamed Asha for putting ideas in my head. Fucking irritating little monster.
Frustrated, I threw back the blankets. My phone read 3:00 a.m. There were three text alerts from Corey. Since none of them were a plea for bail money, I ignored him. Might as well take a shower and rub this one out, or I’d never get to sleep.
Out of habit, I flicked the light switch in my bathroom, which reminded me that the power was out. Right. Brilliant.
Hadley screamed.
My blood went cold.
I ran to her room and collided with the door, damn near pulling the handle off when it refused to open.
“Hadley! Are you okay?”
The door cracked open and I shoved it aside, almost clipping her in the process.
“What’s wrong?” I demanded.
She wouldn’t look at me. I grabbed her face between both hands, urging her eyes to meet mine.
“What happened? I heard you scream.”
“It was nothing,” she whispered. Her pulse throbbed against my fingers splayed along her neck. “I...Nothing. It’s stupid. I’m sorry I woke you up.”
“Stop it with that shit. What happened?”
“I woke up and heard something at the window. It startled me. That’s all. I’m fine.”
Tapping. Scratching. Beneath the sound of rain, a tree limb battering her window. I cursed under my breath and let my lungs inhale. She stepped out of my grasp.
“You scared the shit out of me,” I admitted. Both hands ran through my hair and scrubbed at the back of my neck. “You’re sure you’re all right?”
“Fine.”
“Okay.” I made no move to turn around and go back to my room. I just couldn’t make myself move. “I...uh...Fuck. Give me a second.”
Leaning against her dresser, I forced a few deep breaths to go in and out. It wasn’t lost on me that I might have been more terrified than she was. My hands trembled with the adrenaline still running through my body. I’d been ready to murder someone with my bare hands. Now what?
“I’m sorry,” she muttered. “I—”
“You know what I’m thinking about now?”
Hadley didn’t say a word. Right, that was a poor way to open.
“The time you dislocated your shoulder when you were nine. I saw you disappear down the hill on your bike, and then you screamed louder than I’d ever heard in my life. I think I almost shit myself.”
“I still say that tree came out of nowhere. It jumped out in front of me.”
“So I ran down there, expecting to find you flattened by a car or something, and you’re lying at the base of the tree—a good ten feet from the road, by the way—laughing your ass off with tears running down your face.”
“Yeah, I don’t know. I was surprised as hell to be alive? No idea, because it hurt like a bitch. But you carried me all the way up the hill to Tom’s house. I’m surprised he didn’t melt my bike down after that.”
“But he did have you suited up like a hockey player before he let you ride it again. You were so cute in that bright pink helmet,” I teased, pushing her hair off her face. It took a second for me to realize how I’d touched her, and then I just felt awkward and self-conscious.
Dipshit.
“I should...um...” Hadley trailed off and looked to her windows.
The wind howled outside, rain battering the glass and that damn tree limb clawing at the window like a bony talon.
“I’ll take care of it. Corey will probably have a chainsaw I can borrow. It won’t take anything at all. We should trim all the limbs back from the house anyway.”
“Yeah. Okay.”
She still didn’t sound quite right, and I got the impression she wasn’t entirely calm.
“Come on.” I grabbed her pillow off the bed and put my arm over her shoulder as I led her to my room.
“What are we doing?”
“You won’t sleep at all in there tonight. The stupid tree is going to keep you up as long as the storm continues. You’re sleeping here.” I tossed her pillow on my bed and pulled back the blankets. “Hop in. I’ll take the futon.”
It wasn’t great, but my futon sofa wasn’t awful to sleep on in a pinch.
“Josh—”
“I’m not going to sleep if you don’t. Spare me the argument and just get in. Unless you’d rather we both camp in the living room.”
Because I wanted to be close by if she had an anxiety attack.
“Gee, when you put it that way.”
That was better. Sarcasm meant she was calmer.
“Don’t get lippy. In,” I ordered, pointing at the bed.
Punky huffed. I was sure she tried glaring at me, but the effect was lost in the dark. She did, however, follow my command. She could go right on and consider herself tamed for the night.
“Good.” I tucked the blankets around her, realized that was a fucking creepy thing to do, and went to the futon against the opposite wall.
“Josh?”
“Hmm?”
“You don’t...um...You don’t have to sleep over there.”
My dick stood at attention, now quite interested. I really fucking hoped she couldn’t see me pointing at her like a goddamn weathervane.
“I don’t want to kick you out of your own bed. Just...just shut up, don’t argue with me, and get in.”
“Since you asked so nicely.”
In truth, I was teetering somewhere in the middle of dumbly standing still and taking a sprinting leap right at her. Not at all calm or collected, I walked around the other side of my bed and slipped in beside Hadley. Fucking goddamn torture. If I got up to rub one out now, she’d definitely notice. How was I supposed to sleep with blue balls?
Hey, Hadley, would you mind rolling over and wiggling that little ass against my cock? I’ve still got this raging hard-on from dreaming about fucking you senseless.
Just. Peachy.
Chapter 12
In the morning I found Hadley sitting at the kitchen counter with a white bakery box.
“Hey,” I greeted her as I took a peek inside. “You got up early.”
“I ran out and grabbed breakfast for us since the power is still out.” Her voice was chipper, light. She smiled at me. “Dig in.”
Best not to question my good fortune and just sit down, shut up, and enjoy the moment. If I was honest with myself, I was feeling chipper, too. But I was rarely so forthright within my own mind. I picked out a maple doughnut and shoved half of it in my mouth before I said something stupid to piss her off.
There wasn’t a doughnut in the world big enough to fill the silence between us.
“Hey, umm—”
“I wanted—”
“Go ahead,” I told her.
Hadley turned on her stool, propping one elbow on the counter. “Thank you. Not just for letting me share your room...but for keeping me company and whatever. And if you tell anyone I freaked out over a tree, I’ll smother you in your sleep.”
“No need to make threats.”
Hadley reached over and picked off a piece of my doughnut. I glared at her irritating habit, but she just shrugged and popped the piece between her lips with a cocky smirk.
“It was fun.”
Punky raised an eyebrow, which had me backpedaling.
“Movie night,” I corrected. “We haven’t done that in a while. And it was a hell of a lot better than staring at the ceiling by myself.”
“That’s high praise,” she said. “I’m more entertaining than doing nothing at all. Unless that’s code for watching porn?”
“Fuck. You’re right. I could have been watching porn. Now I feel cheated.”
Hadley slapped my arm.
&
nbsp; “Keep those weapons to yourself, girly. I’ve got your pillow hostage in my room. Behave, or I’ll defile it in all manner of unsavory ways.”
“That’s a low blow. Not nice.” With an unapologetic smirk, Hadley stole the last bit of my doughnut and popped the huge piece in her mouth, chewing in a big, satisfied motion while wiping the icing from her fingers and licking her lip.
Goddamn. Why had I ever tried to break her of that habit?
“Did you sleep well?” I asked.
“Uh-huh.”
Was that code for “I spent the whole night trying not to get groped” or “I’ve never slept so well in my life, and I’m never going back to my own bed”? How was I supposed to interpret the two most vague syllables in the English language? For that matter, why was I putting so much thought into the answer at all?
Because a certain wicked fairy stepsister stuck a bug in my ear that was slowly burrowing into my frontal lobe, digesting gray matter, and coiling around my brain stem.
Fucking Asha.
* * *
As a rule, I tried to avoid participating in discussion during my lecture courses. This one was an elective for songwriters that explored the correlation between popular literature and contemporary music. I’d skimmed the reading, grasped enough to sort of follow along, but I was only half listening. The majority of my attention, as I sat near the back of the room, was dedicated to my notebook. A melody I couldn’t pin down existed on the edge of my consciousness, bobbing on the tide just within sight, though it often disappeared over the horizon. It was teasing me, taunting my ability to isolate and transcribe it in any useful way. That shit pissed me off.
Songwriting and composing, no matter the instrument or style, had always come naturally to me. I was that irritating sort of person who just shat lyrics and melodies like effortless sentences. At least I had been until this particular tune. I scribbled bars of music. After a few minutes, I reviewed my work and determined it looked nothing like the composition I heard through the distortion in my head, like a garbled radio transmission. I just couldn’t hone in on the frequency to clear the noise.
“Mr. MacKay, care to offer an opinion?”