The Perfect Boy

by Hailey Abbott

  “So I’m really sorry about what I did,” she began. “I had it all set up in my head that AJ would make the perfect boyfriend for me, and there was a lot of stuff going on in my life that made me think I needed a boyfriend.”

  “Did you, like, need stability because of your parents’ divorce?” Heidi asked.

  “Hmmm.” Maybe Heidi had a point. Maybe she had been trying to re-create the kind of relationship her parents used to have. “I never thought about it that way, but yeah. Probably.”

  “I kind of figured it was something like that,” Heidi said. “People get so weird when their parents get divorced. Kevin wouldn’t come out of his room for like a month.”

  “I know, he told me,” Ciara said. Just the thought of Kevin made her sigh a little on the inside. She couldn’t believe it had taken her so long to realize just how amazing he actually was. And now it was too late.

  “He’s part of the reason I decided to talk to you today,” Heidi said. “I was hoping I could just go on not speaking to you until you went back to LA, but he conducted this whole campaign to get me to at least give you a chance to explain, and he kind of helped me see things from your point of view. Not that what you did is excusable, but he helped me understand why you might have done it anyway. He’s a good guy.”

  “I know.” This time the sigh was audible. She couldn’t believe Kevin had secretly been talking to Heidi on her behalf. How sweet was that? “The greatest.”

  Heidi gave her a funny sideways glance, and her lips curled into a smile. “You like him, don’t you?”

  “No!” But Ciara felt the smile spreading to her own face as well. Heat rose in her cheeks. “Maybe.”

  “Yes…,” Heidi encouraged.

  “Okay.” Ciara blushed. “Yes. I like Kevin, okay? But it’s too late. He’s with Marlene now—and I am not snaking another girl’s man.”

  Heidi sat down and picked up a handful of sand, letting it run slowly between her fingers. “You know, they’re not really together,” she said musingly. “I asked Marlene about it—they haven’t even kissed. They’ve just been hanging out as friends.”

  “Really?” Ciara couldn’t keep the hope out of her voice.

  Heidi laughed. “Look at you, all excited over Kevin, the hot single stud,” she teased. The thrill at hearing that Kevin wasn’t serious with Marlene mixed with hurt that he was spending so much time with her. All summer long, Ciara had felt like she and Kevin were “partners in crime.” Now it seemed like he had that with Marlene instead of her, and the feeling of being replaced stung.

  “Anyway,” Heidi continued. “All I’m saying is, Kevin’s more up for grabs than you probably think. If you want, I can help you figure out ways to get him.”

  “That’s really sweet of you,” Ciara said, turning to Heidi and smiling. “But I think I’m done with scheming for now. If anything’s going to happen with me and Kevin, it’ll happen because I just went with the flow. After all, look where plotting and planning got me with AJ…and with you.”

  “Yeah.” Heidi sighed. “I would be a lot more pissed at you, but it’s almost hard to blame you. There’s just something about AJ that makes you go a little nuts. Like the way I started dressing like a rap groupie and going on about my wild side? That wasn’t really me. I was just trying to get his attention. It’s almost like, he’s so hot and so sure of himself and what he likes, he can turn you into something you’re not unless you’re careful.”

  “I know exactly what you mean,” Ciara said firmly.

  “You know,” Heidi mused, “he almost made us forget the cardinal rule: friends before mens.”

  “Bros before hos,” Ciara added.

  Heidi paused. “Mates before dates?”

  They both laughed. “Speaking of dates,” Ciara said. “What about the one you had the other night?”

  “Oh, Sunday?” Heidi asked. She grinned at the memory. “It was awesome. He was awesome. We had a totally great time.”

  “Who was he, anyway?” Ciara asked.

  Heidi looked down at the sand, biting her lower lip in a combination of embarrassment and glee.

  “Remember that guy from Smoothie City?”

  “Oh, Heidi!” Ciara shrieked. “The one with the tattoo? Not him!”

  “Why not?” Heidi asked defensively. “He’s a freshman at UC Santa Cruz majoring in biology, and he has three dogs! Guess what he wants to do after college?”

  “Get another tattoo?”

  “No, dumbass!” Heidi swatted her on the arm. “Go to veterinary school.”

  “That does sound kind of perfect for you,” Ciara mused.

  “We had an amazing time,” Heidi said rapturously. “He knows someone who works at the aquarium, and we went there after hours and looked at all the fish and just talked and talked and talked. I mean, he’s only working at Smoothie City as a summer job to make money for college. It’s not like it’s his career or anything.”

  “Whatever,” Ciara said. “I’m glad you found someone who makes you happy, Heidi. That’s seriously great.”

  “Me too,” Heidi said, her eyes still shining. “Now you just need to get together with your perfect guy, and we’ll be all set.”

  “I know,” Ciara said, thinking of the look in Kevin’s eyes when he had put his hand on her shoulder and told her everything was going to be okay. “But if it happens, it happens. If not…well, I guess I’ll have to live with that.”

  Chapter Twenty

  I don’t wanna be a player no more

  Now that I found the one I’m lookin’ for

  —DJ Kevlar

  I found it!” Ciara screamed. She quickly hit “print” on her laptop and waited for pages to start spewing out of the printer. Before the document had fully finished printing, she had grabbed up a handful of the papers and was running toward the kitchen, where her dad was marinating a chicken breast and watching the evening news.

  “You found what, honey?” he asked.

  “The answer,” she said, waving the papers excitedly in front of his face. “What I want to do this fall.”

  “Well, then.” Her dad chuckled. Even through his laugh, she could tell he was slightly nervous. “What is it?”

  “Look at this.”

  “Hmmm.” Her dad scanned the first page. “UC Santa Barbara Program for Academically Exceptional Youth. And what makes you think you’re so academically exceptional, young lady?”

  “Please.” Ciara laughed. “Dean’s list every semester at one of the top private schools in LA? Extracurricular activities and internships coming out my you-know-what? You know, I didn’t spend all those hours studying in my room for my health.”

  “I know you didn’t,” her father said, putting his arm around her. “When it comes to ambition, you’re your mother’s girl.”

  “Look at the programs,” Ciara said, pointing lower on the page.

  “All right, all right.” He read out loud: “Marine biology, advanced mathematics, music business…”

  They looked at each other at the same time, and her dad smiled and nodded. “Bet I know which one you’ll be going for.”

  “It’s perfect,” Ciara said. “And I already checked to make sure they partner with the local high school. You take regular classes at school in the morning, and then in the afternoon, you go to the college campus and take courses in your specialty. Do you have any idea how good this will look on my transcript?”

  “You’re aware that it involves staying here in Santa Barbara,” her dad said. He was trying to sound serious, but she could see the smile threatening to burst onto his face.

  “Um—duh?” Ciara said.

  “Your mom’s going to miss you. But I’ll be happy to have you here.”

  “And I’ll be happy to be here,” Ciara said, throwing her arms around him and giving him a hug. “Plus, with these classes, I might be eligible for the accelerated graduation program.”

  “Okay,” her dad said when they disengaged. “You need to do the right thing and call y
our mom and let her know what your plans are. You know she’ll be disappointed and hurt, and you need to take responsibility for that. Sometimes you can’t help hurting people in order to do what’s right for you.”

  “Well, maybe I’ll go down there and visit her before school starts,” Ciara said. She wasn’t looking forward to hearing the disappointment in her mom’s voice, but maybe knowing they’d see each other soon would make it a little less harsh. Besides, it would be nice to go down to LA and see Em for a while.

  She went to her room, closed the door, and sat at her desk, staring at the screen of her cell phone before she got up the guts to call.

  “Ciara!” Her mom seemed thrilled to hear from her and anxious all at the same time.

  “Hi, Mom,” Ciara said. Her voice sounded weak and timid in her own ears. “Listen, I wanted to apologize for the things I said to you when you were here.”

  There was a pause on the other end of the line. “It’s okay,” her mom finally said. “You had a right to be upset.”

  “Thanks, Mom,” Ciara said. She pushed down the lump in her throat and went on. The hard part wasn’t over.

  “So have you made a decision about where you want to go to school yet?”

  “Yes, I have,” Ciara said. She took a deep breath. “There’s a music business program for high school students through UC Santa Barbara, and I want to take advantage of it. So that means I’ll be staying here.”

  “Oh.” She could hear her mom trying to keep her voice calm, and she felt a twinge of guilt. Why couldn’t she just make everyone happy all the time—even herself? “Well, I’m happy you found what you want to do. It’s important to take opportunities like that as they come. But of course, I’ll miss you.”

  “I’ll miss you too,” Ciara said, realizing she genuinely meant it. “But I’ll still see you—I mean, Santa Barbara and LA are only about an hour away. I’m going to come down before school starts and check out our new place down there, and I can come down on weekends sometimes and on holidays.”

  “Oh, good.” Relief flooded her mother’s voice. “It’ll be so great to have you. I’ll even make that Peruvian chicken from my mom’s recipe. Remember how much you loved that as a kid?”

  “Of course.” A sudden fine mist rose in Ciara’s eyes. She couldn’t even remember the last time her mom had offered to make her favorite food—over the past few years, she had always been too busy with work and had left the cooking to her dad. Maybe the divorce would have some positive side effects after all. Maybe being away would make her mom appreciate her that much more when she was around. And maybe she would learn to appreciate her mom more as well.

  “Great,” her mom said. She sounded happy—as happy as Ciara felt. “So I’ll see you next weekend?”

  “I’ll be there,” Ciara assured her before saying “I love you” and hanging up. She was about to get up and tell her dad about the conversation when she had another thought: if she was going down to LA for the weekend, she should probably tell Em too.

  She pressed her old best friend’s speed-dial number into her phone, expecting the call to go straight to voice mail the way it usually did when she called Em lately. But to her surprise, her friend picked up on the first ring.

  “What’s up, Ciara?” she asked.

  “Hey, not much,” Ciara said. She paused, realizing how ridiculous that sounded. All sorts of stuff was up.

  “You’re coming home soon, right?” Em asked. “We should start looking at classes and make sure we take some of the same ones.”

  “Actually…,” Ciara began. Her throat felt dry. Why did telling people about big decisions have to be so hard? “I’m staying in Santa Barbara this fall.”

  “You’re kidding, right?”

  “I’m not,” Ciara said firmly. “I’ve made a lot of friends here, and there’s this program at UCSB that I really want to take.”

  “Wow.” Em sounded stunned. “I can’t imagine Westwood without you.”

  “You’ll still have Tim,” Ciara pointed out.

  “Sure, I know, but it’s not the same as having you around,” Em said. “So this is it—ta ta, it’s been real, have a nice life?”

  “No, I’m coming down next weekend to chill with my mom,” Ciara assured her. “I promise we’ll hang then.”

  “Next weekend? That’s Tim’s birthday—he’ll be so psyched that you can come down! Oh, and you can help me set up and get the cake and run errands…will you? I mean, that way I can spend time with you without Tim around.”

  “Sounds great,” Ciara said, smiling to herself. She would definitely miss Em, but she wasn’t sorry to be leaving her Tim-centricity behind. “I’ll give you a call before I come down, okay?”

  “All right,” Em said. “Oh, Tim’s on the other line—gotta go.”

  At the beginning of the summer, Ciara would have been pissed at being blown off so quickly, but after what she’d been through, she could almost understand why Em was so crazy about her boyfriend. Not that she’d ever act the same way, she assured herself. When—er, make that if—Kevin was her boyfriend, she’d make tons of time for her girlfriends too.

  She said good-bye and glanced around the room that was to be hers for the next year. Her gaze drifted toward the closet. It was time to pick out something to wear for the big night ahead.

  “Wow, you know summer’s almost over when the sun starts setting before eight,” Ciara remarked as she, Heidi, and Todd of Smoothie City fame strolled through the quiet streets of downtown Santa Barbara to the club, which was all lit up like a jewel against the dim night sky.

  “Oh, please don’t talk about summer being over!” Heidi cried, wrapping her arms around Todd’s waist and squeezing him tight. “That means my baby has to go back to school.”

  “Don’t worry, sweetie,” Todd said, nuzzling Heidi’s hair. “You can come visit whenever you want, and I’ll call and e-mail you every day. Promise.”

  Ciara smiled to herself. Normally, a couple as sickeningly sweet as Heidi and Todd would make her want to puke, but in the wake of the AJ debacle, Ciara was just glad her friend had found her perfect boy.

  “I wonder if the boys are nervous right now,” Heidi mused as they approached the entrance, following a stream of hip-hop fans in do-rags, knit caps, and tight Baby Phat jeans.

  “Probably,” Ciara said. “They’ve only been practicing for this gig all summer. It’s more or less the biggest show they’ve ever played.”

  She thought that Kevin and AJ probably weren’t the only ones feeling nervous right then. She hadn’t seen Kevin in over a week, even though he’d sent her a few short, polite e-mails asking how things were going with Heidi. She wondered if everything would be different now that she realized how she felt about him. Would he know as soon as he saw her? Would she be able to tell if he felt the same way too? What if he didn’t? What if he really was into Marlene, or still into Heidi, or had met some girl since she’d last seen him? Would the way she felt about Kevin turn into the same kind of embarrassing crush she’d had on AJ all summer?

  She pushed the thoughts out of her mind as they waited in line to get their wristbands and be let into the venue. She was here to have fun, not mope over some guy. She’d done enough of that over the summer. Now she was just ready to watch her friends make some incredible music the way only the B-Dizzy Crew could.

  “I can’t believe how packed this place is!” Heidi said. The large, open dance floor in the club was filled to the point of bursting, the excited burble of voices almost drowning out the thud of A Tribe Called Quest over the speakers.

  “This is great,” Ciara said. “B-Dizzy’s just the opening act, but if all these people are here already, it must mean their name is getting around.”

  “Look, there’s Marlene,” Heidi said, pointing all the way to the front. The room was so crowded that Marlene had actually gotten up on the lip of the stage to wave at them. “How are we going to get through all these people?”

  “Follow me,” Todd said. He t
ook Heidi’s hand, Heidi grabbed Ciara’s, and Todd began to lead them through the crowd, gently brushing past people as he politely excused himself. Unlike the dancers on the party boat, everyone at the club moved aside easily to let them pass. Before they knew it, they were standing at the foot of the stage, right next to Marlene.

  “How did you do that?” Ciara asked admiringly.

  Todd grinned. “Wait’ll you get to college,” he said. “You’ll spend so much time pushing your way through crowded parties, it becomes second nature. The trick is just to be polite and firm.”

  “Welcome to the front of the room!” Marlene called, leaping off the stage and spreading her arms for a hug. Ciara noticed right away that there was something different about her. She’d ditched the plain black T-shirts she’d worn all summer and had on a filmy shell with a rose print, layered over a flesh-colored tank top and flowing gauchos. Her lips shimmered with gloss, and her eyes shone with an enthusiasm that Ciara hadn’t seen in her all summer.

  “You look great,” Ciara said, wrapping her in a hug.

  “Thanks,” Marlene said. “I feel great.”

  “What happened?” Heidi asked. “You’re like…all glowy and stuff.”

  Marlene just raised an eyebrow and smiled. “You’ll see,” she said mysteriously.

  Ciara was about to start prying for details when the canned music faded out and the stage lights went up, bathing everything in an electric blue glow. The crowd shushed itself in anticipation, a final bark of laughter skipping over their heads like a flat stone on the surface of a lake and an embarrassed “shhh!” from the laugher’s companion.

  Kevin walked casually onto the stage, brought his fingers to his forehead, and tipped them toward the crowd in a small salute before positioning himself behind the turntables. His face looked strong and confident, and for once he wasn’t wearing a visor, so she could really see how the haircut she’d made him get flattered his high cheekbones. Cheers filled the room, and Ciara’s heart sped up like a thirty-three played on forty-five. She could hardly believe that Kevin had the same effect on her that AJ used to, but it wasn’t just the usual quickening pulse, clammy palms, and tingling skin. It was something more. Seeing Kevin made her feel warm and safe inside, the way a cup of cocoa would make you feel after coming in out of the cold.