by T. K. Leigh
Cam closed the gap between them once more. “I had trouble sleeping, too,” he admitted, gazing down at the beautiful woman in front of him. “Jolene,” he said breathlessly. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you all night. I tossed and turned, thinking how incredible that almost kiss was.”
Each syllable uttered out of Cam’s mouth felt like another knife through her heart.
He noticed her lackluster reaction. “I know that I made a promise to you and to myself to be patient and let you work through everything at your own pace. I just need you to know that I will never hurt you. I will always be here, looking out for you.”
He raised his hand once more. This time, she didn’t flinch. Those silver eyes were kind and she knew his words were true. Her peace was in those eyes. All she had to do was stare into them and she knew everything would be okay, even if for just a fleeting moment.
She leaned in closer to him, her cheek only a breath from his hand. The heat coming off his body sent sparks from her heart to her toes.
“I’ll never hurt you. I know I say this every day, and I will continue saying it each and every time I see you until you realize that the words coming out of my mouth are true, Jolene. I’m one of the good guys.”
Her chin quivered as she listened to Cam’s words. She tore her gaze from him when she heard the crunching of sand on the dirt road, her vision settling on a black government car driving past her house. Her breath caught and she saw David’s degrading eyes staring at her.
“Please, Cam,” she whispered. “I can’t do this right now.” She quickly retreated back into her beach house, the hurt she was feeling for betraying him threatening to tear her apart.
Cam watched in concern, wondering why she immediately turned cold. He heard someone clear their throat and spun around to see Elsie leaning against his Jeep on the side of the road.
“I think she just needs to be alone for a minute, Casanova!” she shouted as she walked across the road and up the steps to the deck. “You have a tendency to be a little intense. Give her time. She’ll come around.”
Cam exhaled, slumping his shoulders forward in defeat. “Can you at least go check on her and make sure she’s alright?”
“You got it, Charming.” She waited for him to walk down the steps before slowly opening Jolene’s front door.
“Tomorrow. It’s just me,” she whispered, spotting her curled up on the couch. “I sent Cam away.”
Jolene rolled over and opened her eyes, meeting Elsie’s concerned look.
“I think we need to have a bit of a chat, don’t you? What is it you’re not telling me? I saw that creepy guy eyeing you at the bar this week. I knew he looked familiar. He’s a U.S. Senator. Any reason a senator from Illinois was hanging out at my dumpy little beach bar, and then drove past your house just a few minutes ago?”
Jolene sat up quickly, her eyes growing wide. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. It’s all… It’s just a coincidence.”
“You’re an awful liar. Word of advice, Tomorrow,” she said, walking over to the one-cup brewer. “Don’t lie to Cam. He’ll know. Avoid answering, but never lie.” She finished making a few cups of coffee before searching the pantry for some whiskey. Finding some Jameson, she poured a bit in each mug. She returned to the living room and sat on the couch next to Jolene, handing her one.
Jolene brought it to her lips, needing the burn of the whiskey to get through that conversation.
“Listen,” Elsie said, her voice full of concern. “I may not know a lot, but I know something’s going on. Is there anything you want to tell me?”
Jolene lowered her eyes, the memory of the previous night fresh in her mind once more. “No. There’s nothing. I just freaked a little.” She sent Elsie a pleading look, willing her to believe the lies coming out of her mouth. She needed her to believe them. She had only been free for a week, but she refused to give up so easily. As much as it pained her, she remained mute. It was part of their bargain.
“Are you sure, Jolene? You can tell me.”
She shook her head. “There’s nothing to tell. Some things trigger memories. There’s no rhyme or reason to it. Like I said…” She raised herself off the couch, placing her mug on the coffee table. “It was just a coincidence.” She met Elsie’s eyes and gave her an icy stare. “Now, if you’ll please excuse me, I’m going to run myself a hot bath and try to relax.” She hurried up the stairs and hid herself in her room, breathing a sigh of relief several excruciating minutes later when she heard the front door close.
Heading toward the en-suite bathroom, she ran the water in the tub, wanting to scorch the previous day off her body. Once the tub filled, she lowered herself into it, relaxing against the cool ceramic. As she stared through the windows at the ocean, noticing the surfers bobbing up and down in the distance, she knew what she had to do. Elsie had become suspicious immediately, and that could not happen again.
She would turn it off. All of it. Go back to the smart-mouthed Jolene that she had been the past week, and do not let anyone see what lay beyond the wall.
She had been stupid. She let Cam under her skin and into her heart and, with each meeting, he had slowly begun to chip at the brick wall she had built up. It was time to resurrect her cold stone exterior and keep Cam away. It wasn’t what she wanted, but it was necessary. She would rather die than go back to him.
~~~~~~~~~~
“CHICAGO P.D.,” A ROTUND detective said sternly, knocking on the glass of a ticket window at a bus depot outside of the city. Flashing his badge, he was certain he finally had the clerk’s attention.
“Sorry,” she said quietly. “What can I help you with, officer?”
“Technically, it’s detective.”
The young girl nodded her head nervously. “I apologize, detective. Is something wrong?”
“I’m hoping you can help me. Last Saturday night, this girl got on a bus from this station.” He held up a picture of Jolene.
The clerk scanned the photo. “I’m sorry, detective. She doesn’t look familiar to me. Why? Did she do something?”
“No. Just a missing person case that we’re trying to get to the bottom of. Now, my sources indicate that she, most likely, arrived here at around one in the morning and supposedly got on a bus for California. Is there a bus schedule?”
“Yeah, but I’ll make it easy on you. The only bus for the west coast leaves in the afternoon so she wouldn’t have been on that one. The last bus out of here leaves at one-thirty each night and its final destination is Miami.”
A sly smile crossed the detective’s face. “Do you happen to know who the driver was last Saturday night? I believe you. I just want to confirm that the girl was, in fact, on the bus before dispatching my team to Florida. I hope you understand.”
“Of course, detective.” She turned her attention to the computer in front of her and, after typing for several minutes, smiled. “It’s your lucky day. The drivers on that route were Terry and Mitch.” She nodded toward two men in bus driver’s uniforms hanging out by the vending machine. “That’s them over there.”
“Perfect.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
SINKING
“EVERYTHING OKAY, TOMORROW?” ELSIE asked the following Saturday night while they were slinging drinks behind the bar.
“Of course. Everything’s great. Why do you ask?” She tried to dodge her inquisitive eyes.
“I don’t know. Maybe because you’ve been avoiding Cam all night. Do you think he comes here just to hang out and have some drinks?” She gestured toward where he stood with his friends. “He is not a fan of bars. He’s here to see you, so stop ignoring him.”
Jolene finished pouring a beer and handed it to a customer, giving him an appreciative nod when he left her a big tip.
“I’m not ignoring him. It’s just…” She trailed off, glancing across the bar at Cam. Just past him stood David. She fought back her tears as she thought of their arrangement. That week, he had shown up at her front door aft
er midnight every night. She had no choice but to let him in.
“It’s just what?”
Jolene stared into Cam’s kind silver eyes, the perfect juxtaposition to the malicious dark eyes standing beyond him, looking at her like she was a piece of property and nothing more. And that’s exactly how she felt. She wasn’t a person. She was simply a thing for David to use as he saw fit, and the thought made her sick.
“I need to use the ladies’ room,” she said abruptly, rushing out from behind the bar and running down the narrow hallway toward the staff room. Locking herself in the private bathroom, she tried to calm her nerves. All it took was one word and Cam would know everything that was going on. But she couldn’t do that because David would out her to him. She wanted to scream in rage and frustration.
Taking several deep breaths, she attempted to calm her nerves, inhaling and exhaling while she fought to shut off everything. Show nothing and they won’t know that they’re getting to you.
Once her emotions were under control, she opened the door of the restroom and headed down the hallway toward the loud bar. Suddenly, an imposing figure in business attire turned the corner, walking briskly toward her. She lowered her eyes, struggling to hide the fear that was in them.
She attempted to continue past him but he grabbed her arm, forcing her to stop and face him. “Where do you think you’re going?” David seethed.
“I need to get back to work. Please.” She raised her eyes to meet his, biting her lower lip to keep her chin from quivering.
“Fine. But first…” He licked his lips and pressed his body against hers. “There’s something I need to discuss with you about our little arrangement.” He leaned in, running his tongue across her neck, making her skin burn. Bile formed in her throat and she swallowed hard. “I want the key to your house.”
Her eyes grew wide. “What? Why? I don’t understand.”
“I can’t very well be seen standing on your front deck, waiting for you to let me in. I expect you to leave me a spare key underneath the doormat out front. Tonight. And I’ll be holding on to it. This arrangement will only work if you’re available when I need you to be. And I’ll need you to be home every night, unless I know that you’re here.”
“People will get suspicious…”
“Do not talk back to me, Jolene. You forget that my secrecy depends on you playing along. It could all fall apart for you at any minute so don’t test my patience. Understand?”
“Yes,” Jolene whimpered.
“Yes, what?”
“Yes, sir.”
A sly smile crossed his face. “That’s a good girl. Now go back out there and act normal. Your life depends on it.” He released his grasp on her and she headed down the long hallway back to the bar, trying to put on a smile for Cam, keeping the secret that was breaking her heart.
“You know I can see right through you, don’t you, Tomorrow?” Elsie remarked when she made her way behind the bar. “What’s really going on with you?”
Jolene fixed her expression into the smile that she had learned to plaster on her face over the years. “Nothing, Else. I’m just a little tired. That’s all.”
“Do you want to take off? It’s starting to die down. I can handle it with the rest of the girls. It’s only a half-hour until last call anyway.”
Jolene shook her head. “I can stay. I don’t mind.”
“Listen. I’m your friend, but I’m also your boss. I’m ordering you to go home. Get some rest. It looks like you haven’t slept in days. Take the next few days and just brush off whatever the fuck is going on with you lately. I’ll see you for your next shift on Thursday and I don’t want you to step foot in this place before then. Got it?”
“Elsie, I…”
“I mean it. Leave. Now.”
Jolene hung her head in defeat. “Okay. I’ll go.”
“Good. I’ll stop by sometime this week and we can check out the cute surfers from your deck.”
Nodding, she scanned the bar, thankful that David didn’t seem to be paying attention to her. He was too busy hitting on a tall blonde. Jolene said a silent prayer that he would take the girl home and leave her alone for the night. She had a feeling she wouldn’t get her wish.
Leaving the shoreline restaurant, she headed for the sand, deciding to walk home on the beach. She made her way down to the water, the only sound that of the crashing waves and the fading classic rock song playing in the bar.
There was something so calming about the melody of the ocean, the darkness of the water soothing and mysterious at the same time. She didn’t know what possessed her but, before she knew it, she was stripping out of her jeans and work t-shirt, running toward the water and diving in, wearing just her bra and panties.
She shrieked when the cold water hit her legs, but she didn’t care. It felt refreshing. She submerged herself in the ocean, floating on her back as the waves began to wash over her, cleansing her of everything she had endured throughout the past decade. Closing her eyes, she let the water carry her where it wanted as she savored her momentary freedom.
She thought about her mother, the woman who raised her. She thought about how caring and gentle she was. They didn’t have a lot of money, but Jolene never went without. Her mother gave up so much to take care of her. She remembered when her father was actually around, which wasn’t much. But when he wasn’t drunk, he took an interest in her. He showed her how to hold a softball glove. He taught her how to pitch. He took her to baseball games. To this day, every time she smelled peanuts, she thought of him. It was the most non-traditional family she could think of, but it was her family.
As waves continued to carry her farther and farther from the shore, she kept thinking about her dad. Where was he now? Did he miss her? Did he know that his alcoholism would ruin her life, too? Did he know that the man he had granted guardianship to was a complete monster? Did he know where she was? Did he even care? Surely he would have come looking for her if he did. So why didn’t he? Why did a complete monster appear on her doorstep instead?
As she began to sink deeper and deeper below the surface, she thought about whether she should fight when she became short of oxygen. Would anyone miss her? No one missed her when she was taken all those years ago. She was certain that no one would miss her now…except for the man with the brilliant silver eyes. A feeling of euphoria washed over her as Cam’s gentle eyes flashed in her memory. She thought about how safe she felt in his presence. How caring he was. How patient he had been. How heated her body became whenever he was near her. How perfect his lips looked every time he almost kissed her.
She even heard him at that moment calling her name, the sound muffled from beneath the ocean surface, just as the blackness took over. And for the first time in over a decade, she was no longer afraid.
~~~~~~~~~~
“JOLENE!” CAM SCREAMED UPON seeing her delicate frame being carried out to sea, the bright moon lighting her against the darkness of the ocean as she continued sinking.
Stripping out of his shirt, he ran into the water, diving beneath the surface and kicking against the waves. After what seemed like an eternity, he finally reached her, praying that she was okay. Not even considering the potential ramifications, he wrapped his arms around her and dragged her to the shore, hoping he wasn’t too late.
Gasping for air, Jolene’s eyes flung open, the sense of someone’s hands on her skin scalding her.
“Don’t touch me!” she screeched, fighting against the arms that had her trapped. She began inhaling and exhaling in rapid uneven breaths.
Cam attempted to maintain his hold on her while she squirmed in his grasp. After just a few seconds of intense struggle, she stilled, almost as if she simply gave up. Wanting to get her on solid ground quickly, he rushed to the shallow end of the ocean.
“Please,” she whimpered. “Just make it quick.”
Her quiet plea tore him apart. He released her once he approached the shore.
“Jolene.” His tone was soothing
as he stared at the frightened woman in front of him. “It’s me. It’s Cam. I’m not here to hurt you. I’m just trying to help you. The ocean was carrying you out. Something could have happened to you.”
She opened her eyes, looking at Cam’s physique illuminated by the large moon. “How could you?” Fighting back tears that were threatening to fall, her voice was full of hurt and her chin quivered. “Why did you do it? You know…”
“What did you mean when you said to ‘just make it quick’?” he interrupted as they stood in the ocean, the waves splashing up to their knees.
Jolene crossed her arms in front of her stomach, trying to hide her body from him. “It’s none of your business,” she spat out, sloshing out of the water toward the sand.
Cam ran after her. He stopped in front of her in an attempt to prevent her from going any farther. “Come on, Jolene. Don’t lie to me. You can tell me. I’m not going to hurt you.”
She laughed sarcastically at his comment. “This isn’t my first fucking rodeo, Dr. Cam,” she said snidely. “That’s what they all say. They all promise that they’ll be gentle, that it won’t hurt.” Her body shook from all the memories. “But the truth is, you all just say that for yourselves, to make you feel better about what you’re doing. You may not think that you’ll hurt me, but you will. You’re all the same.”
She stormed past him, wanting to put some distance between herself and the man that could see behind the wall she had built around herself over the past decade.
“Jolene, please.” Cam grabbed the shirt he had tossed to the sand and ran after her as she bolted up the beach wearing just her panties and bra. He made a mental note to stop giving Elsie so much crap for saying that he only went for the troubled girls. She was spot on, and it took him running on the beach past midnight after a girl wearing wet underwear to make him fully realize what she had been saying for years.