Unconditional

by Linda Rettstatt

  I rose with David and we walked arm in arm to the door. His goodnight kiss held the promise of things to come. “Let me know if Audrey will join us on Sunday, then I’ll call Preston.”

  “Talk to you tomorrow.” I closed the door behind him, so turned on, I’d never sleep. So I mopped the kitchen floor at midnight.

  ~ * ~

  Audrey glared at me while we sat in David’s Jeep and he stood at his brother’s front door ringing the bell. “You lied to me.”

  I turned in my seat and grinned. “I didn’t lie. I just neglected to tell you David and Preston were coming with us.” Ryan gurgled happily in his car seat in the center of the backseat. “You have the perfect chaperone right there beside you.”

  Her fingers drifted over Ryan’s head. “He could have been my date for the day, you know.”

  I heard a door slam and turned. “Oh, my.” I peered over my sunglasses. “Look at that man.”

  Preston wore snugly-fitting faded black jeans, a black T-shirt with gold print that declared him property of the Allegheny County Police and that stretched taut over his muscular chest. He carried a light jacket hooked on one finger and tossed over his shoulder. He looked like a model for a police academy ad.

  “Wow,” Audrey murmured.

  I chuckled. “And he’s all yours. You’re welcome.”

  The back door opened and Preston smiled, then climbed in. “Hey, Meg. Been behaving yourself?” Ryan looked up at Preston, screwed up his face, and wailed. Audrey attempted to soothe him. David’s introduction of Preston and Audrey was punctuated by Ryan’s cries. “And that’s Meg’s son, Ryan.”

  Preston leaned as far away from Ryan as he could get. “What did I do to scare him?”

  “You looked at him,” I said. “This week, he’s at that stage where he’s not fond of strangers.”

  Audrey bent over the car seat, talking softly and stroking Ryan’s cheek. He calmed to a whimper. But the moment Preston smiled down at him, he revved up again.

  David teased, “You have a real way with babies, bro.”

  “Oh, I suppose he likes you better?”

  “Actually, he does.” David laughed.

  I turned around in my seat. “Don’t take it personally, Preston. He’s gotten to know David. Once he gets used to you, he’ll be fine.”

  We drove out of the city and south, eventually climbing up to the summit of the Laurel Highlands. The air changed and carried the scents of autumn—rich damp earth, dying leaves, and impending winter. David parked in the lot just above the falls on the Youghiogheny River. He and Preston carried the food and blankets while I took Ryan and Audrey brought his carrier.

  We claimed a picnic table near the water and David covered it with a plastic cloth. “How’s this?”

  “Perfect,” I said, relishing the cool breeze and the warm sun glinting off silvery green water. I removed a bottle of baby-strength sun block and smeared it over Ryan’s face. The rest of him was adequately covered with a long-sleeved Pittsburgh Steelers shirt and matching sweatpants David had bought for him.

  I felt as if an electric cable has been stretched between David and myself. Every time our eyes met, both of us seemed to spark with energy. I couldn’t get the anticipation of the next weekend out of my mind. Apparently, neither could he. I knew Audrey had noticed, but Preston seemed to be unaware. I avoided eye contact with Audrey while we enjoyed our lunch of fried chicken, potato salad, and biscuits, courtesy of the Colonel.

  David leaned back and patted his stomach. “I think I need a walk before dessert.”

  “Good idea,” Audrey said. “You all go ahead. I’ll clean up here and feed Ryan.”

  Preston gathered up paper plates. “I’ll help.”

  David gave my hand a tug. “Come on. They can take a walk when we get back.” He glanced at his brother. “Behave yourself, bro. Don’t scare the baby.”

  Preston waved a hand at David. “Just go for your walk. We have everything under control here. Don’t we, Audrey?”

  At the sound of her name coming from Preston’s mouth, Audrey’s head shot up. “Huh? Uh…sure. We’re fine.”

  I grinned as I followed David toward a path that sliced into the forest. As soon as we rounded a corner and were out of view, David backed against a tree and pulled me toward him. “Alone at last.”

  I breathed in the slightly sweet, spicy scent of him as I kissed his neck. “Is this where you toss me over your shoulder, drag me into the woods behind a fallen tree, and ravage me?”

  “So you’ve had that fantasy, too?” He kissed me. “No. I want our first time together to be right—flowers, champagne, a soft bed. And then I ravage you.”

  “Oh, the way you talk, Mr. O’Neill.”

  “Uh-huh, but I can back it up.” He grabbed my hand again. “Come on, let’s hike.”

  “Wait. I have some news.”

  “Good news?”

  “I think so. My divorce is final. I thought it would take a few more weeks, but I got the papers yesterday.”

  He studied my face. “How do you feel about that?”

  “Honestly, my feelings are mixed—relief and a little sadness.” I gazed at his face. “Mostly relief, though.” I stood on my toes and kissed him then tugged on his hand. “Let’s go.”

  We returned from our walk to find Preston coaxing Ryan to accept a spoonful of custard. Ryan stared at him warily until Preston lifted the spoon and spiraled it toward him, all the while making a buzzing sound. Ryan opened his mouth and clamped down on the spoon, then grinned when Preston tugged it free to fill it once again.

  “Would you look at that?” David said.

  Audrey looked up as we approached. She smiled and nodded toward Preston who was committed to getting every last spoonful of custard into Ryan. Just then, Ryan accepted a mouthful of the creamy dessert and blew it out, showering Preston’s shirt with sticky goo.

  Ryan giggled, and Audrey laughed out loud. Preston set down the spoon and tugged the shirt away from his body. “Oh, man.” Then he said, “I guess it could’ve been worse. I could have been changing his diaper.”

  David slapped his brother on the shoulder. “Your turn. It’s a nice hike up that trail and back. We’ll take over with Mt. Vesuvius here.”

  I rummaged in the diaper bag and handed Preston a towelette. “Here, this should get that goo off your shirt.”

  But Preston tugged the shirt out of his waistband and pulled it over his head. “I’ll wash it out in the river.”

  My eyes riveted on his perfectly-sculpted pecs and abs. I glanced at Audrey who appeared to have swallowed her tongue.

  David muttered, “Show off.”

  Preston knelt down, dipped a portion of the shirt in the water and wrung it out, then stood and looked at Audrey. “You up for a hike?” He tugged the damp shirt back over his head.

  “Sure.” She accepted the hand he offered to help her across the rocks at the start of the trail.

  I watched them disappear around a bend in the trail. “Thanks for introducing Audrey to your brother. He’s a nice guy.”

  “Runs in the family.” David pecked my cheek then removed Ryan from his carrier. “Hey, little man. You have great aim. I think you could be a quarterback someday. Would you like that?” He lifted Ryan above his head, and the baby laughed out loud.

  “Careful, or you could be next.” I walked to the water’s edge, closed my eyes, and drew in a deep breath. I needed a day like this, when it seemed everything was in balance and working together.

  Chapter Forty-One

  I was wired, anticipating my weekend with David. I may as well have been plugged in to a wall socket.

  Nikki stared as I made my fifth trip into her office, again unable to remember what I came for. “You’re going to be exhausted before you get to the farm.”

  “No. But if things go as well as I hope, I’ll be exhausted when I get home.”

  She waved a finger at me. “Naughty girl. Do you have any idea how good it is to see you like this?”
<
br />   “Do you have any idea how good it feels to be like this? I swear I feel more alive than I’ve felt in ages.”

  She snickered. “If you think you feel alive now, wait until around midnight. And I am so jealous.”

  I needed to refocus. “Who do we have scheduled next?”

  “Mrs. Dorinsky.”

  “Oh, no. That woman has radar and x-ray vision. She reminds me of my mother. And she’s way too interested in what’s happening in my life.”

  “You’re the therapist. Don’t let her take you anywhere you don’t want to go.” Nikki ran her fingers through the hot pink strip in her hair.

  “You’re right. I can control the session. Who’s in after her?”

  “No one. You’re cleared for take-off at O-three-hundred.”

  “I am?” A wave of anxiety rolled through me just as the phone rang. It wasn’t too late to change my mind. Maybe it was too soon to get this deeply involved with David. I had to face the fact that I was scared. Maybe that’s what had held me back and not waiting for the divorce to become final. I was afraid David would be disappointed. I mean, the last man I’d slept with left me for another man. What did that say about my sexual prowess?

  Nikki answered the phone, then said, “Uh-huh. Uh-huh. I’m so sorry. Uh-huh. Okay. Thanks for calling, Mrs. D. No, there won’t be a late cancellation charge under those circumstances. We’ll see you in two weeks.” She hung up and grinned at me. “Mrs. Dorinsky sprained her ankle on her way into the garage. She can’t make it today. You are now free to get down and dirty.”

  “Don’t say it like that.” Heat radiated in my cheeks.

  “You’re blushing, so I know you’ve already thought about that.” She stood and took me by the shoulders, turning me around and into the hall. “Get your briefcase and give me your files. Then go home and pack as little as possible.”

  I didn’t argue. I wavered between giddy teenager and seasoned slut. Until I realized the weekend was about sex, and not only about sex. I wanted to feel wanted again, to feel desirable and sexy and womanly. I wanted to feel that intimate emotional connection with a man.

  “You’re home early,” Elena said when I walked in the front door.

  “Yes, I had a cancellation. Is Ryan asleep?”

  “He should be waking up from his nap soon. Thomas called and said he would be here at four to pick him up. What time are you leaving?”

  “Four-thirty. But I still need to pack. If you want to go, I’ll be here when Thomas arrives.”

  She nodded. “Okay. I can beat rush hour traffic. Meg, have a nice weekend with your friend.”

  “Thank you. We’re…uh… I’m helping him decorate his new counseling center.”

  She gave me a rueful smile. “That’s good. I’m glad you’re going away for a few days.”

  “Me, too. Thanks for everything. See you Monday.”

  “I’ll be here.” She picked up her purse and jacket and headed out the door.

  I checked on Ryan before packing my bag. I laid out clothing on the bed—a pair of cotton pajamas, a pair of short boxer-style bottoms and a matching tank top, and a silky nightgown Audrey had given me as a gift. My lingerie would have been considered sexy, if I lived in a retirement home. I should have bought something special. The pajamas said ‘let’s sip cocoa and tell ghost stories’. The boxers and tank said, ‘let’s do our nails and gossip’. And the nightgown screamed, ‘turn off the light when you come to bed, gramps’. Crap. Why didn’t I go shopping? Then I laughed. Who’s going to be clothed for more than five minutes anyway? I tossed the shorts and tank top into the suitcase.

  Thomas arrived at four o’clock and I handed the baby off to him, then followed him to the car carrying Ryan’s diaper bag. “Everything is in his bag. Well, you have food and diapers at your place, I guess.”

  “I have everything we’ll need.”

  “Good, so I’ll see you on Sunday.”

  “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were trying to get me out of here as fast as possible,” Thomas said.

  “No. I just don’t want you to get tied up in traffic. You know how fussy Ryan can get in the car when it’s not moving.”

  He studied my face. “Uh-huh. You’re going out of town?”

  “Not really. Just north of the city for a few days to help a friend with decorating, relax a little.”

  “Good.”

  Mercifully, the phone rang in the house. “I need to get that.” I kissed Ryan on the cheek. “Be good for Daddy. You guys have fun this weekend. Bye.”

  “Meg, have a nice weekend,” Thomas called after me. Then he grinned. “And tell David I said hello.”

  I raced up the steps and into the house, grabbing up the phone. “Hello?”

  “Hi. I’m running a little late. I should be there in half an hour,” David said.

  “I’m ready. I mean, I’ll be ready. When you get here—to leave. I’ll be ready to leave.”

  He chuckled. “I get it—you’re ready. I am, too. See you soon.”

  I heard Thomas’s car pull away from the house. I took in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “Okay, get a grip.” I carried my bag to the front door and paced until David’s Jeep turned into the driveway. I grabbed my jacket, hoisted the bag onto my shoulder, and opened the front door.

  He met me on the porch and grinned. “In a rush?” He kissed me ever so lightly, sending a shiver down my back. Taking the bag from my hand, he pulled the door shut behind me.

  ~ * ~

  The farm house smelled of roses and pine cleaner. David had planned everything down to the finest detail. Fresh flowers adorned the coffee table and the kitchen table. Firewood had been stacked beside the fireplace. Candles were strategically placed around the room. A bottle of champagne chilled on the kitchen counter.

  David picked up his small duffel bag and my suitcase. “I’ll take our bags upstairs.”

  “I’ll come with you. I want to see what you’ve done with this place.”

  “Oh, no. The bedroom is off limits for now. It’s a surprise.” He kissed the tip of my nose. “I’ll be right back.”

  I removed my jacket and hung it in the closet in the front hall. The polished hardwood floors gleamed. A soft leather burgundy sofa with two matching chairs sat facing the living room fireplace. In the kitchen, a butcher-block farmhouse table occupied the center of the space. A valence with a rooster design hung above the window at the sink.

  David walked up behind me and put his arms around me. He nuzzled my neck. “Finally I have you all to myself.”

  I leaned back into him, tilting my head to give him better access to that tender spot near my ear that ignited me. “Mmm, that’s nice.”

  “You like that? How about this?” He nipped my earlobe as his fingers brushed across my breast.

  My response was immediate and evident. “That’s nice, too.” I turned in his arms and thrust my hips forward.

  David groaned. “This isn’t part of my plan. Not yet. But, damn, you are so inviting.”

  “You know what they say about the best laid plans…”

  He laughed. “Freudian slip?”

  For all I cared, he could back me onto the butcher block table, tear off my clothes, and take me right there in the kitchen.

  “Let’s have a toast.” He removed a bottle of champagne from the bucket on the counter. He pressed a thumb to either side of the cork and worked it loose. With a resounding pop, the cork flew across the room and champagne bubbled from the bottle. I held two flutes while he filled them.

  He lifted his glass. “Here’s to us. To love that’s new, longing that’s deep, and happiness that will last.”

  I clinked my glass with his and sipped the bubbly liquid. “Very poetic.” He was so sensitive and a red flag waved in my brain. I stared into David’s eyes and ran my tongue along my lips.

  He got my message and picked up the bottle. “We can take this with us.” He waited for me to go ahead of him up the stairs where I met a closed bedroom door. “Wa
it one minute,” he said as he slipped past me and into the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

  I stood in the hall holding my half-empty flute of champagne.

  He opened the door and took the glass from my hand, setting it inside the room. Then without warning, he swept me into his arms and carried me across the threshold.

  Red and pink rose petals littered the bed. Blinds darkened the room and candles sent shadows dancing across the walls. Soft jazz wafted from a CD player on the dressing table.

  “This is so romantic.”

  He smiled into my eyes. “I wanted to make our first time together special. I hope you’re not allergic to roses.”

  “I love roses,” I said, glancing at the bed.

  Our mouths locked, tongues dancing together as he carried me to the bed. He laid me atop the rose petals, then dropped down beside me. We undressed each other efficiently, without a spoken word. Our actions were interrupted only by brief kisses.

  “God, you’re beautiful,” he said, staring at my naked body. Smooth palms traced over my breasts and down my belly, leaving hot trails.

  Still, I felt self-conscious. Had I lost all the baby weight? I knew my belly hadn’t returned to its formerly flat self. I glanced down. What if my body had changed since I’d given birth? What if I didn’t feel sex the same way?

  He teased me with soft lips and rough fingers until I was ready to burst, dispelling the last fear. Each time I neared the crest, he eased back, torturing me until I begged for release.

  “David,” I breathed his name. “Do that again. Please, I need…”

  His mouth covered first one breast, then the other as his hand trailed up the inside of my thigh. With one touch, he sent me over the edge and into the grip of an orgasm that made my toes curl.

  Then I reached for him, urging him inside me. I relaxed when I realized my parts all worked. And his parts seemed to work just fine, too.

  Our lovemaking was slow and tender. When his control reached its limit, he drove deep into me and spoke my name with such intensity. Another explosion rocketed through my belly as I dug my heels into his back. I wrapped my arms around his neck and clung to him, riding out the aftershock.