by J. K Harper
Even though his voice stayed low, soft, Riley put every bit of conviction and strength he had into his words. “I would never judge you for the sins of your parents. You are good people, Marisa Tully. You are a good person.”
He watched her eyes staring at him, unblinking. But her lower lip trembled.
“And your cat isn’t crazy. Neither are you.”
“How do you know?” Her whisper was so low it almost melted into the snow.
“Because,” he slid his hand down her arm to gently grip just above her elbow, ready to help pull her up, “she came back here, didn’t she? Because she knew you couldn’t leave without saying goodbye. She let you come back. You are your cat, and you remembered to come back.”
The lip tremble turned into a shake, then an earthquake as her whole face crumpled in on itself. Then, the floodgates opened and tears began sliding down her cheeks, running down her chin. Faster and faster, and she didn’t even try to stop them. He pulled her up, unresisting, until she was on her feet. Small, thin, impossibly beautiful woman. Leaning into him, now her shoulders shaking. She was getting the front of his shirt wet. His bear roared. The need to protect her, to keep her safe while she finally let go and cried it all out, overwhelmed him. He had to get her inside where she could feel safe. With him.
Finally he glanced back at where everyone else still stood, collectively almost holding their breath as the scene played out. Shane looked solemnly at Marisa now sobbing into Riley’s chest, pulling Jessie close to him in some sort of protective response to seeing another woman bawling. Haley, also snuggled into Cortez, looked like she might cry too. Abby, oddly enough, seemed pleased, although her eyes mirrored the shock Riley knew everyone there felt.
He looked at Quentin. His brother still had some doubt on his face. Riley gave him a hard stare. Quentin grunted under his breath, one side of his mouth tucking up in an accepting half-smile. Nodding once at Riley, he then turned to his mate and simply said, “Looks like he’s got things handled here. ”
Abby nodded, hair gleaming under the first shafts of moonlight rising from the east. “And Slade's got the cubs for the night. He texted me to say whatever's going on, he's got them as long as Riley needs. Everyone will be fine. Let’s leave these two alone. Let me know if she needs anything in the morning,” she added to Riley as she turned to Quentin, tucking her arm through his as they strolled away.
Riley watched his clan members as they left. Trusting him to not only take care of Marisa, but that he’d keep them safe too from whatever demons lurked in her past.
Deep inside, uneasiness whispered that Marisa’s past wasn’t done with them yet. For now, though, all he could focus on was keeping his beautiful lion girl safe and sound. Brushing a kiss over her hair, he murmured, “I’ve got you. I’ve got you, you’re safe with me. Come on.” He gently walked her into the cabin, knowing with every fiber of his being that even if he didn’t know exactly why, everything had just changed for good.
Marisa was his to keep safe from now on. After the cubs, she was the most important thing in the world. He would do anything to protect his sexy lion girl.
No matter what dangers might still wait for them.
12
Marisa barely felt the steps up to her cabin under her feet as Riley opened the door and guided them inside. Her entire body felt detached from her, as if it were a puppet she controlled but couldn’t feel. The tears were unstoppable. They poured out of her as if she'd had an ocean locked inside, one that finally had broken free of its dams. It was terrifying but so necessary all at once.
She let the tears come since she was helpless to halt them anyway. Riley’s big, protective arms were wrapped around her tight, but not so tight she didn't have the space to howl out her pain. He just held her close, held her safe.
Safer than she’d ever felt in her life.
Completely unrestrained, she let herself bawl in earnest. Crying it all out seemed to be the only thing she was capable of at the moment. The relief of finally having told everyone the truth of her life was immense. The tears were like a final cleanse, clearing out all the hurts, the doubts, the old wounds. Washing away the primal fear that she was broken beyond repair and unfixable.
Riley held her close as she sobbed, his mouth dropping small kisses on her head, his arms strong and sure around her as the two of them stood in the middle of the cabin's small living room. His strong, hard body, the one that seemed like it could take on a thousand enemies and win, protected her from the world. But at the same time, his strength allowed her to fall apart.
This was a true release, and he was giving it to her. Even through her tears, Marisa felt enormous gratitude that he was a strong enough man to let her cry and not try to stop it until she was ready.
Slowly, so slowly, the heaving sobs eventually dwindled. It felt like she'd cried it all out, emptying a lifetime's worth of pain. The tears finally ebbed to a stop, though her heart still felt raw. But she also felt…light. So light, as if the heavy burdens she'd carried for so long had finally been lifted.
It felt like a precious miracle.
Marisa felt mixed rumbling in her chest. Suddenly more aware, she pushed back.
No. No growling, not now. She wasn’t letting bad kitty out. She wouldn’t let out a snarl, or aggravated hissing, or the incessant demand to change so she could flee again across the empty mountains. She wouldn’t—
Wait. Wait, wait, wait. Marisa stopped short. She almost held her breath as she listened to her own body.
This was different. She couldn’t identify the rumbling in her chest, but it wasn’t a growl.
Riley whispered a laugh over her head, his warm breath stirring her hair. “Are you purring?” His voice was a low, comforting rumble by her ear. She could hear the smile in it.
Abruptly, she was fully back in her body. Lifting both hands, she splayed her fingers out, pressing her palms over her chest. Low, faint, but steady. There. “Is that what that is?” She could hear the wonder in her own voice.
Bad kitty knew how to purr?
Riley briefly nuzzled the top of her head, which made the rumbling in her chest intensify. “I think so, pretty kitty. Pretty lion girl.” He stepped back and very gently took her shoulders, turned her so she faced him. “Beautiful lion woman. Strong, sexy woman. Yes, that’s your cat purring.” A big smile curved up both sides of his mouth.
She stared back at him, still feeling the vibrations beneath her hands, looking closely at him as she tried to figure out what was different about his face. It hit her. “Your eyes. They’re really blue, aren’t they?”
He chuckled again, those amazing eyes still drinking her up. “Always have been.”
She shook her head, finally taking away one hand to reach forward. Tentatively, she touched the stubble on his cheek. Oh, sexy man. “No, they haven’t. I’d swear they were blacker than night the first, I don’t know, dozen times I ever saw you.”
He blew out a sigh, glancing around her cabin. “Yeah. I know. I get really dark when I’m angry. When—” He paused, seeming to search for the right words. His glance came back, settled on her again. “When I thought about what had happened to my family. Every time I thought about it, I had to work so hard to leash my bear that it took all my energy. I know that made me grim. Mean, sometimes.”
He huffed a breath again, leaning into her palm where it rested on his cheek. “It scared me when I began to realize I was so enraged over what they had done that I was losing control over my bear. Over everything. Even over my own happiness,” he said, as if he’d just realized it. “Huh. I never really thought about it that way. But it’s true. The only thing that kept me grounded was finding something to balance, which was the aikido and the cubs. I’ve kept my shit together for them. They’re never losing another parent.”
He said it so fiercely, she could see his bear rumbling deep in the shadows of his eyes.
But they stayed that sexy, clear blue.
She nodded. This moment suddenly felt bo
th strained but light, heavy but gentle. “What was her name?”
“Grace.” The way he said the name spoke volumes, but she didn’t hear the deep sorrow of someone clinging to something long gone.
She just heard him honoring his dead mate, as a good man should.
“And you found the ones who killed her?” Her stark words were calm, but her cat stopped purring. She seemed, instead, suddenly wary.
There was a long beat. As she watched, fascinated, his eyes definitely darkened again. The stormy sky blue went closer to navy. By the way he clenched his jaw, she knew he fought to keep himself on an even keel. After another moment, his eyes slowly started shading into the lighter blue. Then he shook his head. “No. They’re still out there. That’s part of why I didn’t trust you at first, Marisa. Knowing they’re out there has made me not trust strangers. Mostly humans, but unknown shifters, too. And,” his voice hardened again, “we know some outcasts have worked with shifter hunters before, to get them to take out enemies.”
Shock and anger lashed through her at that terrible piece of news. Shifters, even if they were outcasts, working with shifter hunters? Against their own kind? The thought was enraging.
He nodded, then shoved up one shoulder in a regretful half shrug, keeping his eyes locked on hers. “Yeah. So partially because we knew that, Quentin didn’t want to trust you either. He’s suspicious of everything anyway. But he said Abby was so convinced you had just been used, that you were caught up in something you wanted no part of, that he wouldn’t let me do anything. Like interrogate you.”
Her voice suddenly threatened to stick in her mouth, but she managed to shove out the words. “Would you have? Interrogated me?”
He shook his head, slowly but firmly. “No. I wanted to, but I couldn’t. My bear was so interested in you. I was so interested in you. I knew you weren’t bad. You weren’t really one of them, Marisa, and I knew it deep down. I tried to make myself believe you were, so I tried to push you away. I was an ass to you. Because I was scared shitless. I was so terrified of what it might mean I wouldn't even let myself think it.” His hand reached up hold hers where it still cupped his face. “I’m not scared anymore. Are you?”
Marisa felt her breath speed up. “No. I could never be afraid of you, Riley. But,” she added quickly. She had to ask. “Are you—is she—Grace, I mean. Is she—”
She didn’t have to finish her stumbling sentence for him to understand. His hand in hers tightened, fingers stroking the back of it, eliciting tingles that ran down her arm, through her body. “She’ll always be the mother of my cubs. We will never forget her. One day I will avenge her.” The shade that rippled through his voice when he said that made a long, low shiver skitter down Marisa’s back. Her cat growled in support.
“But,” his voice softened again. “Although they were wonderful years, and I’ve mourned her for a long time, she’s gone. I truly let go of her a long time ago. It’s what she would have wanted me to do. I had to anyway, if I was going to be an even halfway decent father to Finn and Laney. Part of her will always be in my heart, Marisa. She deserves that. However,” he murmured, pausing for a long moment. Eyes still locked on hers, he turned his face until the inside of her hand covered his mouth. Pressing his lips against it, he kissed her palm so slowly, so tenderly, that the breath started rattling in and out of her chest, her entire body heating so fast she felt lightheaded.
Moving his head back, his own breath coming quicker, he studied her face with a new expression on his. One filled with a sweet, rich hunger. “However, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you from the first second I saw you. You are not weak, Marisa. You are not unworthy. You are worthy of every joy and amazing thing in this world, do you hear me? And,” he growled, his eyes a sexily ravenous blue that threatened to devour her willing body, “you are so fucking sexy I can’t deny this anymore.”
He crashed his lips onto hers, meeting her more than willing mouth, kissing her so hard and fast their teeth scraped together as she molded herself to his body. Riley groaned, pressing his hands against her ass then lightly squeezing it. She gasped against his mouth, closing her eyes, shamelessly pushing herself against him.
Yes. This. All of this. All of him. This was what she wanted, and needed.
Riley murmured something into her lips, the sound a rumble of excitement that curled and danced along her nerves. She felt delicious goosebumps tickle up and down her body as she arched fully into his kiss.
Never in her life had anything felt like this. All the times she'd tried to find something with some random guy that resembled love, anything that could take her away from the ugly realities of her life for even a few moments, disappeared into a forgotten haze.
Because this was incredible. Spectacular. Filling up her heart and soul in a way she knew was realer than real.
“Marisa,” he groaned against her mouth. The sound of it held such deep longing, such pure worship, that she felt its echoes in her heart. “Now. Need you now.”
“Yes,” she whispered back.
Without warning, her hoisted her up in his arms, drawing a small gasp of surprise from her. But she quickly melted against him, wrapping her arms around his broad shoulders, nibbling at his neck, his cheekbone, as he strode toward her bedroom. Gently, he set her down on the bed. Carefully, he stepped back, never taking his eyes from hers.
Marisa's breath hitched in her throat. They weren't even naked, they'd done nothing yet but kiss, but just having Riley look at her this way sent trembles racing all over her body. His eyes, shadowed with pure desire, wouldn't let hers go. She felt the heat spreading throughout her, lighting a delicious fire in her veins. The sensation flickered beneath her skin, the moment so charged with erotic electricity she thought she might explode.
From a torrent of tears to being totally turned on. She almost giggled at the inane thought, until Riley started to unbutton his shirt. Then she just stopped thinking. Her breath seized again, catching in her throat as she watched him take off his shirt.
Then his pants.
Under which he wore nothing at all.
Her eyes widened and she almost forgot to breathe.
Oh, holy… The man was ripped. Nothing but pure muscle. Muscles slid from his shoulders all the way to his forearms, plated across his flat stomach, surged down his legs.
And between his legs. Oh, holy everything. Her lips parted. Riley was big everywhere. Definitely.
Marisa dragged her eyes back up to his, which looked at hers with that burning desire. His mouth curved up in a smile at her dropped-open mouth, but when he spoke, his voice was solemn. Respectful. “May I undress you, Marisa?”
Sweet, kind, thoughtful man. She was about to rip her own clothes off, and here he was, asking her permission like a gentleman. Not sure her voice would work, she just nodded. He padded toward the bed. Completely at ease in his body. Completely unafraid to share all of himself with her.
Marisa found her voice. “Riley. Fast. Take them off fast. I want to feel your skin next to mine.”
A sound that was half growl, half groan sounded in his throat. “Slow,” he gritted out. “Have to go slow, or I might not be able to give you the attention you deserve.”
Oh, that was sexy. So very, very sexy.
At the edge of the bed, he paused. Carefully, gently, he reached out a hand to touch her feet, then slowly unlaced her shoe. She almost laughed. She'd forgotten she still had shoes on. Was this sexy? This couldn't be sexy. Suddenly embarrassed, she started to sit up, reaching for her shoes herself. But he shook his head. “Let me. They're just shoes.” He added in a whisper, “You deserve to be worshiped, Marisa.”
Worshiped. Marisa's head spun at the simple word that rocked her world. No one had ever worshiped her before.
As promised, Riley undressed her slowly. So slowly but so deliberately, with small touches on her bare skin after he removed each piece of clothing, that she was panting when he was done. Each graze of his thumb over her sensitive flesh, each
breath as he kissed her stomach, her legs, her arms, set her pulse rocketing.
She thought she might pop like a cork from all the exquisite tension inside her. Her breath vibrated in her throat as gasps tumbled from her lips.
“So beautiful,” Riley murmured, staring down at her like she was the most incredible thing he'd ever seen. “Let me see all of you now.”
With fingers as light as air, he pulled off the last wisp of her clothes, leaving her completely exposed to his heavy-lidded gaze. His breaths, she noted, were coming as quickly as hers. A light moan of appreciation was more suggestion than sound as he gently stroked her everywhere, exploring each curve, each hollow, every inch of her body.
“Riley,” she said, his name falling out in a gasp. “I need you.”
“Yes.” His voice was a deep growl filled with desire. Then he reached for her, sliding his body over hers, the expression on his face as purely worshipful as he'd promised.
But to her surprise, he moved off to her side, then onto his back. Hands still gentle but with just as much urgency as she felt, he rolled her on top of him. “Want you up here,” he murmured. “Want you to go at your pace. You lead this, beautiful woman.”
Marisa gulped at the raw need in his voice. His body trembled beneath hers. She realized with a jolt that he wanted her as badly as she wanted him, but he was holding back.
For her. So she could for once in her life feel in control of something.
Her heart burst wide open, flooding her with a world-rocking depth of connection and wonder. Oh, this man.
Every nerve in her body felt alight from the way he'd been touching her as he undressed her. His thick, heavy dick pressed hard between them, stoking the flames higher. She let a pleased smile slide over her face, then slipped her hand between them to take the heavy warmth into her hand. Squeezing it, feeling it pulse against her fingers, she grinned even more as Riley's control loosened. He made a garbled sound, his eyes darkening with passion rather than the fury she'd sensed in him for so long now.