Rhylan
Page 75
His thoughts wandered back to Lucy as he made the final trek back to the shop. A woman that he barely knew and should hardly trust all things considered, yet he wasn’t above admitting that he wanted something more to happen between them. And that’s exactly why her declaration the night before hurt him so much.
Shifting was such a fundamental part of who Dan was; he couldn’t picture his life without it. He recalled his contemplation on the possibility of a human mate and how quickly he casted it aside because he felt, deep down, he needed another bear that understood all of him. As much as he hated to admit it, a bit of hope blossomed in his heart when he learned that Lucy was a shifter because it made his immediate attraction to her a little less complicated.
But then she told everyone that she didn’t shift.
Hello again, complication.
Learning a bit of Lucy’s backstory, Dan could guess that there was a good reason that she chose not to shift, but the primal side of him didn’t know how. To him, giving into the beast was natural and inevitable. He hoped that, whatever her reasons, she’d remain open-minded to a life with the pack that included showing her bear every once in a while. Otherwise, he wasn’t sure if there was much of a future for them, after all.
He scoffed quietly to himself. “Figures.” I should have known better, he finished internally as he stepped through the shop doors. Cursed bears don’t deserve happiness, remember?
Distant noises of power tools and the strong odor of axle grease filled the quiet office area, signs of the alpha brothers hard at work. With a final long sigh, Dan forced down the turmoil that churned deep in his belly about the fundamentals of shifting and the beautiful woman who defied them. He worked here, too, and Lucy aside, they had too much to do for him to worry about something so miniscule in comparison. Tom would probably be leaving soon to work on the house, and Nick would need help with the auto work before patrols started for the day. On top of that, having openly vouched for Lucy to the point of borderline pleading for Nick to trust her, he felt obligated to watch over her for Nick on the off chance that his intuition was completely wrong about her. Not that he minded doing it; he could hardly complain about having to survey a beautiful woman all-day, anti-shifting or otherwise. His attraction to her was still going strong, but there was a little sadness in the mix now.
I wonder if talking to her about it will change anything, he thought, somberly. If he found out the reasons behind her unwillingness to shift, could he maybe talk her into a change of heart someday soon?
Unbidden, the question had hope blossoming unceremoniously in his heart once more. If he had to guess, it likely had something to do with her thug of a brother. If all she knew of shifting came from him, Dan couldn’t blame her for being reluctant to embrace that part of her. But maybe, just maybe, he could show her the good side of shifting. Maybe all she needed was a glimpse at the bigger picture, what being a shifter is supposed to look like.
His heart began to lift as he thought of the possibilities. He’d likely be spending a lot of time with her in the coming days, which meant he’d have plenty of time to convince her that there was a good side to her bear. He’d show her everything he could, how important and strong and beautiful she could truly be.
He thought back to all of the helpless bears still trapped in Lucas’s clutches, and how he’d vowed a mission to help them see that there was more and better than what they knew. As thoughts of Lucy ran circles in his mind, he knew without a doubt that the best place to start was with her.
Chapter Nine
“Good morning!” bellowed a cheery, deep voice as Lucy entered the office.
She smiled at Dan, his wide grin so early in the morning, making it hard for her not to reciprocate. She could admit to herself that he looked quite handsome, the bit of bruising that remained from his tussle with Dominic notwithstanding. His muscles stood out in the dusty shop vest that he wore, but not in the garish way that her brother’s muscles bulged with the slightest movement. Dan looked… organic, real, and strong in a way that Lucy could most definitely appreciate.
“Has your morning treated you well?” she asked as Jo rummaged with something in her trunk. Dominic hadn’t told her much of anything about this pack before they uprooted and moved here. The idea of a human mate seemed odd to say the least, but she’d warmed to Jo rather quickly. Staying with the alpha and his human mate at the cabin wasn’t nearly as awkward as she’d originally feared it’d be.
Dan nodded, snapping her from her reverie. “Absolutely,” he answered, his grin growing. “Nothing like a bear run first thing in the morning to get a tired mind going!”
Instantly, something soured in her stomach. “Oh.” She felt her smile wilting around the edges, but she tried not to show it. The night before, she knew she saw something change in his eyes when she told them all that she didn’t shift, but she wasn’t sure how they’d take it. Surprisingly, they didn’t seem to care, but in a pack where the alpha leader’s life mate is a human, she assumed they held more open ideals than most. Even Dan hadn’t said anything outright, but there was something in that gaze of his…
“So,” Dan continued, unfazed by her sudden silence. “What are your plans for the day? They putting you to work already?”
She shrugged, looking around the shop. “I told them I’d help wherever I could.” She smiled up at him, seeing a good opportunity to steer the topic of conversation away from shifting for a while. “Think you can help me with that, sailor?” Dan’s eyes glimmered as he grinned, and it warmed Lucy’s heart. He really was a good guy. It was refreshing.
“Helping others is what I do best!” he quipped, taking a cursory look around the shop. “I know Jo’s been working to spruce this drab office up a bit. Maybe you can help with that?”
Lucy followed his gaze around the office, her nose wrinkling subconsciously. “DIY isn’t really my thing.”
“Oh come on,” Dan laughed. “It’s just a bit of dusting and maybe laying a little paint on the walls. Besides,” he added with a wink, “I bet you’d look pretty cute in a pair of overalls with a little paint on your cheeks.”
Lucy laughed as little bubbles of excitement popped in her belly. When they’d first met, Dan seemed like the type to let others take the lead, but it was nice to see that he could be a little more forward if he tried.
“Fine,” she agreed with a mock roll of her eyes. “I’ll ask Jo what she needs help with once she gets in.”
Dan chuckled his approval. “And who knows? Maybe when you feel like taking a break, we can grab some lunch together?”
Lucy raised an interested eyebrow at the proposal. This was a different man than the clumsy bear she’d met the night before. She approved. “Yeah, I’d like that.”
“Good to hear,” he replied with a smirk before turning away to join the others in the garage. She couldn’t help watching him as he went, all toned muscle and pure brawn as he walked away.
She wondered idly what would come of this, their budding attraction for one another. She wasn’t holding out hope for anything permanent. She’d painted herself as an asset to be used against Dominic and her cousin, Lucas. She had no way of telling what they’d think of her once the threat was eliminated, or if her help would eliminate it at all. Jo was nice, Nick was kind, and Dan was… nice, in more ways than one, but this pack didn’t quite fill the hole of the home she’d left behind. If they cut her loose once all was finished, she honestly wouldn’t be surprised.
But how would Dan feel?
She didn’t know if what they had now was worth worrying about, but she couldn’t stop the question from wafting through her mind. Would he care that she’d be gone? Or would something like her unwillingness to shift be enough for him to write her off forever? Her stomach churned uneasily at the possibility.
“Well, he did ask me to lunch,” she reasoned quietly to herself, peeking out at Jo once more. She took solace in that fact; he must still have some bit of interest in her, even after that odd look he�
�d given her back at the cabin. Maybe there was something worth salvaging, even if only for the moment.
She knew he’d probably want to talk about it soon. Some days even she didn’t fully understand why she was so hard fast on keeping her bear locked down, but deep down she knew it was for the best. Bears are predators, hunters, attackers. They measured their strength in power, not kindness—domination, not benevolence. That kind of mindset… corrupted people. They began to crave the fear, the, the subjugation, and called themselves privileged for it. Like it was some heavenly gift bestowed upon them solely for the purpose of enslaving those weaker than them. The shift to bear and back against always left whoever gave in a little less human, and it was terrifying to see, every time. It happened to her brother; she wouldn’t let it happen to her. That was that. If Dan hoped for anything to blossom between them, it was just something he’d have to accept.
What if he didn’t? What then? Would she leave, or would she hold up her end of the bargain and trade information for safety? Could she handle being alone? These people were kind, even for strangers, and Dan had the possibility of being something more. Did she really want to throw that all away simply because of a petty personal preference?
She shook the questions from her mind, clutching her hands to her chest in an effort to physically suppress her doubt. It had been so long since the bear was let out; it had a way of slipping uncertainty into her subconscious. She wouldn’t let it win. She couldn’t. No, not, not ever.
Setting her shoulders, Lucy took in a long centering breath. There was only one way she could keep her unease from growing worse. She’d have to sit down calmly with Dan and fully explain her situation. She’d have to thoroughly convince him that this was who she was and if he expected anything more of her, then he would be sorely disappointed. They both needed to lay out their boundaries and expectations, because anything less would only be setting each other up for heartbreak. If she put anymore hope into this pack than what she already had, she didn’t know how badly it would break her if things fell apart right in front of her. She’d make damn sure she had all the information before taking another step forward with them… and especially with Dan.
She glanced idly at her watch, heaving a sigh. It would be a few hours before she and Dan would be able to talk. Until then, she supposed she’d busy herself with some of the menial tasks he’d told her about before he left.
As if on cue, Jo walked through the office doors, looking around expectantly with an arm full of paint brushes and tape. “Oh, you’re alone,” she said, giving Lucy a mildly confused look.
“Yeah, well, I mean, I wasn’t but he — Dan left,” Lucy answered, giving Jo a perplexed look of her own. “You almost look disappointed.”
Jo only grinned in response.
***
“Oh, wonderful!” Savannah exited the back room of the office in a flurry of motion, making a beeline for the coffee pot that was stationed in the side of the room. “Fresh coffee!”
Lucy had tasked herself with brewing a fresh pot after Nick’s second cup of the morning had drained it dry. She learned early on that the alpha pack of Woodhaven drank a lot of coffee. Forest Haven, she corrected internally, chastising herself for falling back on her brother’s old terminology. If she was going to be a part of their pack, she didn’t want to drag any potentially bad habits into it. They were good people, untainted by the darkness of her old life. Until the day she left them behind, it was her job to keep it that way.
She smiled happily at Savannah. “I couldn’t think of much else to do around here, so I’m happy to have helped some.”
“Oh, never you worry,” Jo interjected with a smile as she ruffled though what looked like some flashcards of paint samples. “There’s plenty to be done around here. I’m sure you can tell by the mess that we’ve been doing a bit of remodeling.” She looked up from her stack of cards with an open smile. “Anything you can do to make this interior design disaster a little less painful would help me immensely!”
Lucy nodded. “Dan mentioned that,” she confirmed. “Though like I told him, I’m not sure how much help I’ll be. Decoration isn’t exactly my passion.”
Jo’s smile only grew. “I’m not sure it’s any of ours, either,” she quipped, Savannah nodding animatedly in agreement over the steaming cup of brew she’d poured. “But look around you and tell me if we can honestly do worse than…” She let her voice trail off, dramatically waving her arm at the current state of the office.
Lucy had to admit, it was a bit drab, but she wasn’t well versed enough in the art of interior design to state all the reasons why. But still… “Would you be surprised if I told you I probably could?” she asked with a joking smile.
Jo laughed. “I’m in the same boat as you, if we’re being honest.” She held up a few of the color samples on the desk in front of her. “We’ll just have to start slow. What harm could we do with a simple splash or two of paint?” She fanned out the cards in her hand. To Lucy, it looked like two shades of blue and the exact same shade of grey on three different cards. “Which one do you think would brighten this place up best?”
“Definitely the middle grey one,” Savannah declared. “It’s light and welcoming. We might even get a few more customers with it.”
“Really?” Jo asked, intrigued. Lucy couldn’t help but utter the same question mentally, but with a great deal more doubt.
Savannah nodded again. “I think so, but I’m no expert.” She peeked at the walls surrounding them. “To be honest, any one of those colors would be better than what we have now.”
Looking at the matte brown finish of the walls, complete with a wallpapered accent to the wall that reeked of the 60s and marred in spots with oily handprints and forest mud from everyday working and living, Lucy had to agree.
Jo groaned. “I told Nick it was a terrible color, but he’d wanted to keep the budget small and use some paint he already owned. Plus, he liked the color, a lot. Said it looked ‘woodsy’,” she finished in air quotes, her nose wrinkling in distaste.
Savannah and Lucy laughed as she shook her head forlornly. “But would you believe that this is better than how it looked before?” she asked. “You should have seen this poor office when I first arrived. It was a train wreck.”
“Oh, so you haven’t always lived here?” Lucy asked, realizing just how much she had left to learn about everyone here.
Shaking her head, Jo shared a quick smile with Savannah. “Nope. In fact, I haven’t been in Woodhaven for very long at all,” she answered. “Before Nick, I was involved in the art business, pretty much across the country. I met Nick in transit to a job, and well, one thing led to another…” Her voice trailed off, leaving the rest to history as she smiled at memories Lucy couldn’t decipher. “Now, I live in a cabin with the love of my life and work here at the shop as a secretary of sorts.”
Savannah chuckled. “I’m all the happier for it. If it weren’t for your expert organizational skills, I’m not sure if I could have been much help when I arrived.” She looked over to Lucy. “I do the finance things here. And let me tell you, even with Jo’s amazing logging system, it’s been tough keeping up with these guys and their sheer negligence towards all things orderly.” She shook her head, but there was a smile on her face. “They may know how to run a pack with ease, but when it comes to running a business…” She and Jo shared another knowing look that Lucy hoped to understand some day.
Her heart grew warm at the obvious friendship they shared, and found herself wanting something of the same one day. Maybe she could find it in them, if she stayed. “So you came along after Jo?” she asked Savannah.
Savannah nodded, her smile dimming slightly. “I did. As you know from last night, I was once a part of the Northern Wind pack, myself, so I know a little of what you’re going through, if only not in blood.” Jo gave Savannah an encouraging look, and Lucy could tell that Savannah was reliving some dark times before she spoke once more. “I forsook them after falling in lo
ve with Tom and swearing my loyalty to this pack, and we’ve been known as the Forest Haven pack ever since.”
“Oh wow,” Lucy replied in awe. “That’s some tale. So you know first-hand what my cousin’s pack is like? What they’re capable of?”
Savannah grimaced. “Kind of,” she admitted. “I was a bit low on the totem pole though, not even allowed to fight or know much of the inner workings. That was more Dan’s forte. He was a part of the Northern wind pack for way longer than me and was way further involved; he’d know more from his time there than I ever would.”
Lucy started at the new information. “Dan was a part of Lucas’s pack as well?”
“Yeah,” Savannah answered. “A big shot, too. Second in command before things went south. He ended up joining this pack a little before I did.”
“But not willingly,” Jo murmured with a smirk.
“True,” Savannah agreed with a smile of her own before turning back to Lucy. “But it’s not my story to tell. Just have a chat with him when you have the time, I’m sure he’ll be open to explain just about everything to you, no problem.”
“I will,” Lucy replied, already mulling over all of the new information she’d received. “I certainly will.”
Chapter Ten
Five days passed before Lucy was able to speak to Dan alone. Their original lunch date fell through due to some extra work Dan had promised to do and had forgot about, and then the next few days were a series of rainchecks that kept getting postponed because of personal obligations, responsibilities, and general busyness. They’d spent a good amount of time together since her first night in town, but it was always as a part of ‘the pack’, the two of them never finding time to themselves. This evening, however, Lucy was determined to change that.
“Dan,” she called, catching him as he stood from doing some unnamable task at the rear of a wrecked truck with no wheels. His body glistened with sweat from a quick patrol he’d done earlier, and it didn’t help that the fans in the garage port only blew around warm air. Lucy appreciated it, nonetheless. Fatigue looked good on him.