Deity didb-3

by Steven Dunne

  ‘We’ll let you know if you do.’

  ‘And I could bring another DVD,’ he said excitedly. ‘Have you seen Badlands?’

  ‘Is it as good as Picnic at Hanging Rock?’ asked Adele.

  ‘You liked that?’ asked Rusty.

  ‘It was wicked,’ said Kyle. ‘Wondrous.’

  ‘Pretty good,’ conceded Becky.

  Fern looked less certain but nodded in agreement. If Becks liked it, she liked it.

  Rusty managed to lift his head towards Adele. Her eyes were still red from the tears. ‘What about you? Ade?’

  Adele stared off into the distance. ‘Haunting,’ she said finally.

  Rusty smiled and looked briefly at each in turn, before returning his eyes to the floor.

  Becky held her hands open. ‘Just one thing, Geek Boy. What happened to the three girls in the film?’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘Well, where did they go?’

  ‘They disappeared. They walked up Hanging Rock and were never seen again.’

  Becky pulled a face. ‘I know that. But it’s a film — what happened to them in real life?’

  ‘You’re missing the point, Becks,’ said Kyle.

  ‘I’m missing the point? Cheeky fucker.’

  ‘But you are,’ said Kyle. ‘See, it doesn’t matter what happened to them.’

  ‘It matters to me.’

  ‘Kyle’s right,’ said Adele. ‘What matters is they left of their own accord, on their own terms.’ She looked over at Kyle, who held her gaze for a second.

  ‘Oh, is that what matters?’ said Becky. ‘Well, that’s not what matters to me, Ade. I want to know if they really died. I mean, they must have found out what happened. Three girls can’t just vanish like that, can they?’

  ‘One of them was found a week later, remember,’ said Rusty. ‘But she had no memory of what had happened.’

  ‘D’uh!’ said Becky. ‘I’m not a mong. I saw the film.’

  ‘Yes, you did. And you should already know the most important thing,’ said Kyle. ‘They left their pain behind them for everyone else to bear.’

  ‘Yeah, okay, they left their pain behind. Boo hoo! But what actually happened to them?’ she insisted. ‘I can’t write a five-hundred-word review on just that. Three girls climb a rock and disappear. End of.’

  ‘It’s a mystery,’ said Rusty, risking another smile.

  ‘Stop grinning at me, Geek Boy, or you’ll be wearing your teeth as a necklace.’

  ‘He fancies you.’ Fern laughed, leering at her friend. Rusty looked away, suddenly flushed.

  Becky sidled round to him and put a hand up to stroke his cleanshaven cheek. ‘Course he does. He’s got eyes, hasn’t he?’ She remembered a line from the film. “Am I your Botticelli Angel?” ’ She giggled at Fern then turned back to Rusty and kissed him on the same cheek. ‘Mmm, you’ve got quite the manly stubble, haven’t you, Geek Boy?’ She laughed.

  ‘Don’t be dread, Becks,’ said Adele.

  ‘What?’ Becky held her hands open to underscore her innocence.

  Rusty didn’t move, a faint smile fixed on his face. He pulled the camcorder up to hide his reddening features and began filming her.

  Becky’s expression betrayed an objection but she didn’t voice it. ‘Stop hiding behind that thing, Geek Boy. Tell me.’ Rusty kept filming so Becky gave in and pouted at the lens, fluffing up her curly blond hair with her hands and striking several poses. ‘I mean, if it’s based on a true story, where did they go?’ she said as she looked at the camera with a startled expression.

  ‘Here’s a theory even somebody shallow and superficial can understand,’ said Adele, an icy edge to her voice. Becky narrowed her eyes. ‘Without doing a day’s work in their lives, those girls became famous. They were frozen in beauty and time forever and here we are talking about them over a hundred years later. Jealous?’

  Rusty put the camcorder down and smiled hesitantly at Adele. ‘That’s very clever, Ade.’

  ‘Jealous? Me?’ sneered Becky. ‘You mental bitch.’

  ‘When I go that’s what I want,’ said Fern. ‘People everywhere talking about me, missing me. It’ll be so sad. Like Romeo + Juliet.’

  ‘Kylie’s the jealous one,’ continued Becky. ‘He’d have loved going to a girls’ school, wouldn’t you, sweetie?’ She directed her laughter towards Fern, who cackled her approval.

  ‘All those gorgeous dresses to wear,’ Fern answered.

  Kyle managed a good-humoured middle finger.

  ‘Never mind, Geek, I can guess what happened,’ replied Becky, sitting back down. ‘I’ll bet those blokes raped and murdered them. Only sensible solution. Men are only interested in one thing. Isn’t that right, Kyle?’

  Kyle squirmed under her accusing gaze but this time didn’t react. The limelight shifted quicker that way.

  ‘No answer from Faggot.’ Becky downed her drink and stood to leave. Fern followed suit. ‘Well, I’ll see you all at Sad Bastard Central tomorrow night. And you better not tell any cool people I’m coming to your party, Kylie.’

  ‘I don’t know any,’ quipped Kyle.

  Becky glared at him but decided not to challenge. She stalked away as if on a catwalk, Fern trailing in her wake.

  Rusty stood to film them as they walked away. ‘Poor Becky.’

  ‘What do you mean?’ asked Kyle.

  Rusty stared at the table. ‘To be so ugly inside.’

  Adele gazed at him, a thin smile forming around her mouth. ‘Maybe it’s a cry for help, Rusty.’

  Rusty turned the camera on Adele but lowered it when she became uneasy. He looked into her dark eyes briefly.

  ‘Do they really not know what happened to those girls on the Hanging Rock?’ asked Kyle.

  ‘No, though there are lots of theories,’ said Rusty, finishing his drink. ‘The favourite is that they were buried under a rock fall somewhere near the summit. Me? I prefer not to know. That way they do live forever.’

  ‘Live forever.’ Adele nodded at him. ‘Like angels.’

  ‘Or gods,’ chipped in Kyle.

  ‘And poor Sara who flew to her death from the roof of the school — did she really kill herself? For real, I mean.’

  ‘Sara?’

  ‘The orphan — the girl who wasn’t allowed to go on the picnic because her school fees hadn’t been paid. She lost her best friend on Hanging Rock and later jumped off the roof of the school.’

  Rusty shook his head. ‘I don’t really know. Most people concentrate on the girls who disappeared.’ He looked at her, pleased, and then a moment later said, ‘She had to content herself with being mortal.’

  Adele nodded at him, her dark sad eyes mesmerising. ‘And alone.’

  At that moment Rifkind entered the refectory and glanced across at Adele. She darted a quick peek in his direction then looked away.

  ‘You okay?’ asked Kyle.

  She raised her dark eyes to him and smiled. ‘I will be.’

  Six

  Brook did a few hours’ paperwork then set off home in the late afternoon as there was little more to be achieved after details of the incident had been entered on the PNC. It was a fine warm day though he was so tired he hardly noticed. The post mortem on the unknown corpse would take place in the morning, and without a cause of death and an ID, there was nothing left to do except pointless theorising.

  Dr Higginbottom had already emailed a copy of his preliminary report. He couldn’t speculate on COD but his initial inspection had shown that several, if not all, of the deceased’s organs had been removed, so the corpse had clearly undergone a rudimentary post mortem.

  One possibility mentioned by the doctor was that the body might have already been somewhere in the mortuary system but had been misplaced or misappropriated, so Brook had Noble contact the Coroner’s Office to request a list of all recent post mortems performed on corpses fitting a broad description of their John Doe. Brook then compiled a list from Yellow Pages and the trade website for undertakers
and funeral directors of all organisations who might employ a mortician. He restricted the search to Derby and the surrounding area but even so there were still dozens. Death was a reliable employer.

  One drawback to Higginbottom’s theory was the unusual incision in the man’s side. The doctor had never seen a corpse after a PM with such an aperture, and neither had Brook or Noble for that matter. More often than not, a British pathologist or mortician would cut a corpse down the middle of the chest from the neck to the pubis with a slight detour around the sinew of the belly button, because it was difficult to both cut and sew up afterwards. Brook had known pathologists who’d trained in the United States as Medical Examiners and used the Y-shaped incision often preferred over there. But no reputable pathologist would extract the organs of a cadaver from a six-inch opening on the flank. It just wasn’t practical, according to Higginbottom.

  Before heading for home, Brook and Noble searched the Missing Persons databases for both Nottinghamshire and Derbyshire and marked the files of the dozen men around the right age who were unaccounted for. Unfortunately, though some had seen the inside of a prison, none had been born in Scotland. The attached photo IDs for the subjects didn’t look promising either, though some of the images were out of date, sometimes by many years, depending on the date of disappearance.

  ‘Want me to start ringing round the funeral homes?’ Noble had asked.

  Brook picked up his car keys and shook his head. ‘Let’s have that conversation tomorrow when we have more information and maybe an ID.’

  American Beauty starring Kevin Spacey, directed by Sam Mendes in 1999 — an exploration of romantic and paternal love, sexuality, beauty, materialism, self-liberation and redemption. According to Wiki at least. He could show them that film at the party. Adele would love it. Kyle too. Maybe Becky would be more cynical.

  But the bonus was Ricky Fitts, one of the characters. He was young and cool and spent all his spare time filming on his camcorder. Just like me.

  Rusty stopped at the side of the road and bent down to the pavement. Yeah, American Beauty. Life — a journey without meaning. This pigeon knew. You live, you get by, you die and everyone forgets you. He lifted his camcorder and zoomed into the pigeon lying on the ground, its neck slack, and its opaque sightless eyes half-open. Maggots were chewing through the bird’s intestines.

  A few seconds later he zoomed out and continued on his short journey across the Brisbane Estate, at the western edge of Derby. He replayed the short sequence as he walked through the cool night air then deleted it. His brand new Sanyo camcorder had great picture quality even at night. Just as well.

  Becky Blake read the letter one more time, refolded it and slid it into the small gap between the carpet and the actor’s make-up bureau which her dad had made especially for her. The light bulbs around the frame were to accustom his daughter to stardom.

  She sat on the padded chair, cradling her old teddy bear and staring at her reflection in the illuminated mirror for what seemed hours. Finally, she sat up straight and Justin the bear fell to earth. She looked away from her reflection but there was no escape from her face — wherever her eyes wandered in her bedroom, her image glared sassily back at her. Sometimes writhing on a bearskin rug, sometimes peeping coquettishly over a bare shoulder, sometimes hands on hips in Don’t-fuck-with-me mode. The confident, self-assured bitch snarled next to the vulnerable girl/woman, who jostled for wall space next to the siren looking for love. Her portfolio of portraits, professionally done and paid for by her father, filled the walls.

  A tear fell as Becky turned to face herself on the wall. She couldn’t meet her own eye and was tempted to trash the shrine, tear down every corrupting image and deconsecrate the pink room completely. Avoiding her own gaze, she looked instead at the few remaining posters fighting for space, posters that spoke of Becky’s graduation from thirteen-year-old wannabe to the luminous cynicism of the eighteen year old. Thus the lacy chutzpah of Gwen Stefani was juxtaposed with the brassy sexuality of Christina Aguilera, the perky whole-someness of Hannah Montana with the brooding promise of Rihanna.

  With a sigh Becky stood in her silk slip as another tear fell. Calmly, methodically she toured the room taking down all the photographs her father had paid for then slid them under her bed. She flipped up the lid of her laptop and clicked off Facebook to load the document she’d written a couple of days previously. Dear Becky, I am pleased. .

  She finished reading and spotted the spelling mistake underlined in red but it was too late to correct — it was already two days in the post. As she closed the brief letter, a casual glance back at her mirror caught a movement outside in the darkness. A second later her eyes widened in disbelief at the sight of Rusty Thomson, Geek Boy, shinning his way along the branch of the large tree outside her window. Her initial impulse was to turn and vent her spleen, but to her astonishment she found herself watching him in the mirror, unable to move, as he slithered into position.

  Instead of rushing to the window to scream abuse, Becky busied herself on her laptop keyboard, keeping her back to the window but her eye to the mirror to observe the gawky Thomson. A moment later Becky watched him lift his right hand. The faint dot of red light emanating from the object in his palm was confirmation of his intent. He was filming her. Geek Boy was filming her in her bedroom. Cheeky fucker.

  She took several deep breaths then put her laptop aside on the bed and stepped over to her make-up bureau. She moved the chair so she could stand closer to the reflection and the lights. She stared at herself in the mirror again, this time with heightened interest. Her nipples had hardened under her slip and she brushed them with her forearms as she ran her hands through her hair.

  Slowly, very slowly, she began to sway her hips from side to side, throwing back her head and opening her mouth invitingly. She cupped her breasts in her hands through the soft silk and massaged her nipples with fingers and thumbs. Then she crossed her arms over her chest and flicked the thin straps of her slip from her shoulders and down her bare arms.

  Little by little she lowered the slip until, with a faint wobble, her breasts wrestled themselves free of the material and she pushed the garment to her waist. Swaying more urgently now, she eased her hands down her stomach before pushing the shiny slip to the floor, standing naked before the mirror. Finally she turned towards her bedroom window and stared intently at the red dot.

  PICNIC AT HANGING ROCK — A FILM BY PETER WEIR

  In the 1975 film Picnic at Hanging Rock, set in Australia in 1900, a party of girls from a local college set out for a day at Hanging Rock, a local beauty spot. The film begins in Appleyard College and introduces us to the girls as they dress, wash their hair and press flowers. They are all very ladylike and it is clear that the college is private and parents have to pay to send their daughters there.

  Early on we meet the beautiful Miranda, who is compared to a Botticelli Angel by the French teacher from a book she’s reading. Botticelli was a painter in the fifteenth century. We are also introduced to Marion and Irma who are also pretty, but it is Miranda who steals the film with her looks and also her sadness. She seems to know that she’s not going to live very long because she tells her friend Sara, who idolises Miranda, that she must choose someone else to love because she herself is doomed.

  Sara is appalled at this. She is an orphan who is picked on by the headmistress, Mrs Appleyard, because her foster-parent has not sent the money to pay for her lessons and so she is not allowed to go on the upcoming picnic. Irma compares Sara to a deer she found that died, fragile and pale and also doomed to die.

  So things are all set up towards some kind of tragedy at Hanging Rock and every time we see a shot of the rock the music becomes creepy, as though some supernatural force is living there. Also, the girls spend a lot of time looking at the sky as though they are thinking about the afterlife and being angels.

  At the picnic, the coach driver tells us his watch has stopped: another bad omen that the Hanging Rock is somehow not
natural. Miranda asks a teacher if she, Irma and Marion can go and explore the rock. Another girl, Edith, nags them to come along too. She is not pretty but overweight and she always complains, in comparison to the calm beauty of the other three. As they disappear from view, Miranda turns with her long blond hair and waves at the teacher, almost as if she’s saying goodbye.

  On Hanging Rock the film becomes less natural. There is a lot of slow motion with weird sound effects and odd camera angles which imply that some unseen force is watching them. Also the girls seem very calm and resigned to their fate. At one point, Marion says, ‘Surprising how many humans are without purpose,’ which I take to mean that she sees no point in living. Also Miranda says, ‘Everything begins and ends at exactly the right time and place,’ as though she knows her time is up and she accepts it.

  While Edith is whingeing again the three friends hold hands and set off further up the Rock. This is in slow motion and there is an unnatural rumbling as they leave. Edith seems to know something is wrong and begins screaming and runs off.

  I found this film very moving. It was quite slow but I couldn’t take my eyes off it. What I found most moving was the calmness with which the girls faced their death. They are the only ones in the film who don’t seem to be suffering. They’re leaving the world behind. Their pain is over and it is left to everyone remaining to suffer the torment of their disappearance and to wish they’d behaved differently towards them.

  Back in the real world, Mrs Appleyard’s school starts to go bust and she ends up drinking too much and then killing herself at Hanging Rock. Sara throws herself off the roof of the school because she misses Miranda so much and she can’t bear the pain. The director is telling us that perfect love can’t exist for very long and we have to settle for imperfect love or die.

  Interestingly, one of the girls, Irma, is found but she can’t remember anything and her life becomes really miserable again once she returns to normal life. The director might be suggesting she may have been better off dead because now she has to grow old and ugly and live with all her pain. He’s also trying to tell us that a lot of the story may not be real and not to believe what happened because the first words spoken by Miranda are from a poem by Edgar Allan Poe which I found on the internet. ‘What we see and what we seem is but a dream, a dream within a dream.’ This tells us that reality and fantasy are being mixed up, like life may be a (bad) dream but there are different places where you can be happy, including when you go to the afterlife.