Right Where You Are

by L. E. Bross

  Was this all happening too fast? Four years with Grant was a long time. Single for only a few months and I was getting hooked on another guy?

  If any of my sorority little sisters came to me with this scenario, I’d tell her to slow down. But damned if I wanted to. Seth wasn’t like anyone else I’d known. He didn’t have an agenda. He wasn’t with me for what I could give him careerwise. I was just . . . Avery to him. And I liked it.

  Because honestly, I wasn’t really sure who I was anymore.

  Finally I had started taking control and making my own choices, and I liked the feeling. For the first time in my life, I didn’t have classes or schedules or obligations. Aside from CS, my planner was open and I had mentally written Seth in on every day.

  I grabbed a six-pack of local beer and a couple of bottles of water and headed to the checkout, eager to see him again.

  The hours before Seth showed up felt like years. I rearranged the picnic basket three times trying to get it just right.

  By the time he knocked on my door, I’d even changed my clothes a half dozen times. The light blue sundress I’d settled on whispered against my thighs as I tried not to run to open the door.

  “Hi,” I said with a smile.

  He’d changed his clothes—jeans and a charcoal T-shirt that made his eyes look amazing. His hair was still damp, and I could smell the fresh scent of soap.

  “Hey.” The way his gaze ran down over me and then back up made me glad I’d chosen this dress. His eyes were dark and full of want when he finally met my stare. “You look beautiful.”

  I swallowed and pointed at the basket when he took a determined step toward me. “There. Please. Grab that?” Words tumbled from my lips, but I needed him to take the basket before I pushed the door shut and we had our picnic on my bed.

  Seth grabbed the basket in one hand and wrapped the other around my waist, pulling me against his body. He buried his mouth in my neck and my knees went weak. “God, you always smell so good.”

  Maybe lunch in bed wasn’t such a bad idea?

  “So I’m guessing we’re having a picnic?” he asked when he pulled away.

  He left his arm around my waist and I leaned into him to grab my purse.

  We took my car for the AC, and after a short twenty-minute drive, I pulled onto the gravel road that led to the parking lot in front of Lake Johnson.

  “This is it,” I said. A sudden case of nerves got me. What if Seth thought it was stupid that a small bit of secluded lakefront was the place I went when I needed to think? To dream a little?

  “Cool. Never been here before.”

  We got out and Seth grabbed the picnic basket. We walked hand in hand down the mulch-covered pathway, but instead of going straight to the public beach, I veered him off onto a barely discernible trail.

  “Is this where you dispose of the bodies, counselor?” Seth asked.

  “Of course,” I said over my shoulder. The path was so narrow that we had to walk single file now. Finally, I could see the water sparkling between the thick bushes and led Seth down a short embankment.

  The lake opened up in front of us, brilliant blue water that was so clear you could see the pebbles underneath. Boats whizzed by, pulling laughing water-skiers, and a few sailing boats floated farther out.

  Even though a hundred feet farther up there was a beach full of people, this spot was quiet.

  “Wow.” Seth set the basket down and stepped to the edge of the water.

  It should have been weird, being there with someone, because I never had the urge to share this with Grant. I never once wanted to bring him here. This place was all mine.

  But I wanted Seth to see it.

  Wanted it to be our place now.

  God, this was happening too fast. The logical part of my brain wanted me to take a step back and analyze what was going on. Was I lonely? Was this a natural reaction to being cheated on and dumped? Would this excitement fade when my normal life started back up again?

  That I had no answers should have made me turn and run, but it made my stomach flip and my skin tingle. This unknown. This taking-a-chance thing was seriously addictive already.

  “Look for rocks, Avery. I want to show you how to skip them.”

  Seth stood in the water with his pant legs rolled up. Sun glinted off the bits of blond in his hair, and every time he caught me staring, he would grin at me.

  Something had shifted since I’d met him at O’Malley’s. He seemed lighter. Freer.

  And he was entirely too good-looking for his own good.

  Where Grant was tall and thin, built more like a long-distance runner, Seth looked like he could step into a fighter’s cage and come out the winner. Lean muscles and broad shoulders, and indents in all the right places on his stomach.

  Dips and valleys that I traced with my fingers for almost an hour after the third go-around last night. My fingers tingled from the memory. Absently I bent down and grabbed the first rock I touched.

  “Like this one?” I held up a sort of round one the size of a grape.

  Seth splashed over and examined my find. “Nope, try again. Look in the water.” He was determined I’d get it. It took another five minutes of looking before I found one he deemed acceptable.

  “Perfect. Now turn your hips.” He put his hands on my hips to guide me into the correct position. Cool water splashed over my calves. “Pull your arm back and hold the rock loose, palm up. Then pull back and flick your wrist.”

  I waited for him to step back, but he didn’t. Heat radiated from him, and an ache started in the spots where he touched. When he brushed his lips over my neck, I dropped the rock.

  He chuckled in my ear, a confident, satisfied sound. When I bent over to pick it up, his grip tightened, keeping my hips pressed against his. “Now just drop it again about ten more times.”

  I stood up and laughed, then swayed my ass back and forth across the front of his jeans. He wanted to play that game? His groan was the best revenge.

  “Best teacher ever.” I sighed.

  He laughed and kissed my shoulder. “It’s all in the wrist technique.” He slid his hand slowly down my arm until his fingers wrapped around my wrist. Then he tilted it at an angle and moved it as if I were throwing it. “Try again.”

  This time when I let it loose, it actually skipped twice before plunking into the lake.

  “I did it!” I laughed and spun around to face him. “You are officially the best teacher.” I stood on my toes and ran my lips over his neck. His hands tightened at my waist.

  “You’re killing me,” he growled. “There are people everywhere, and all I want to do is get you naked and spread out on that blanket.”

  Heat coursed through my body. I almost said to hell with the people.

  Seth took my hand and led me to the blanket, and for one exciting second, I thought he was going to just do what he said he wanted to.

  He must have seen the direction of my thoughts because he laughed. “Sit down, you exhibitionist. We are not fucking in public.”

  I pouted, and he drew me down to sit beside him. His breath was hot as it washed over my bare shoulder. “When we get home, on the other hand . . .”

  “When can we leave?” I asked, lost in the sensations spiraling from where he touched me.

  “Not yet.” He fished through the picnic basket and pulled out some grapes, the crusty baguette, and the cheese. When he lifted out the chocolate, he raised his eyebrow at me. I swatted his arm.

  “What? This is perfectly acceptable picnic fare.”

  “Uh, no, it’s not. No fried chicken. No baked beans. No chips even. And where the hell is the pie?” He tipped the basket upside down and shook it. As if a pie would mysteriously fall out.

  “Have you ever had a slice of baguette with cheese?” I asked, pulling the bread from the packet and ripping off a hunk.

  Seth lifted an eyebrow with amusement. “Uh, nope. Unless you count grilled cheese. Then yes, yes I have.”

  “This is not g
rilled cheese.” I chuckled and cut off a thick slice of the aged cheddar, then arranged it on a paper plate with sliced apples and grapes. Instead of handing the plate to him, though, I reached out and took the bread and cheese and lifted it to his mouth.

  He opened and I fed him, never breaking my stare from him. Every nerve in my body was strung tight. I’d never fed anyone before. When his warm lips closed around one finger and he ran his tongue over it, I almost dropped the plate.

  I think I was panting. Or maybe it was just in my head that I couldn’t catch my breath.

  Seth nudged my hand with his chin. “More.”

  After I fed him half the loaf of bread, the apple, and a handful of grapes, he lay back with his hands behind his head. It would have looked like the whole thing hadn’t affected him at all, except the bulge in his jeans said otherwise. I leaned over and ran my nails over the outside, and he grabbed my wrist.

  “Nope.”

  “Seriously? No one can even see us,” I groaned, flopping onto my back at his side. If this was his idea of foreplay, he was exceptionally good at it. Too good. I was pretty sure I was on the verge of imploding from suppressed need.

  “This is the get-to-know-you portion of our date.”

  I rolled onto my side and leaned my head against my hand. “I thought we did that already? Multiple times in fact.” When I wiggled my eyebrows at him, he laughed.

  I could listen to that sound all day.

  He rolled to face me. “I want to know what makes Avery Melrose tick.”

  I wrinkled my nose. “Honestly, I’m just a boring, ordinary person.”

  Seth leaned in and brushed his lips over mine. “You are anything but ordinary.” He lay back and pulled me with him so that I was tucked under his arm. “Why law? Tell me why you chose it.”

  Why I chose it? I thought back to when I was younger, to when I used to sit in my dad’s office in our home and watch him shifting through papers, hundreds of sheets, while he worked a case. Back then he was a partner in a private practice, and I thought he was the most amazing man on earth for helping innocent people.

  It was many more years before I realized that wasn’t always the case.

  But by then, my father had already started to guide me along a similar path.

  So no, I don’t think I ever chose to be a lawyer, it was just what was expected of me.

  “I guess I never really chose it so much as let it happen,” I admitted. “I mean, I do love law and I love solving problems, but it was my father who wanted me to pursue it. I went along because . . . I guess because it was something I was good at?”

  Seth laid his hand on my chest. “What about in here? Did you want it in your heart?”

  I tried to shift away from him, uncomfortable with this turn in conversation, but he held me tight.

  “I didn’t have aspirations of being a dancer or an artist or anything like that, so it didn’t matter.” My voice grew higher, and I knew I probably sounded defensive. “I grew up around the law. It makes sense.”

  “Settle down,” he said against my hair. “I’m not trying to piss you off, Avery, I promise. So law. Cool. What kind?”

  I inhaled a ragged breath through my nose. Grant never asked me about my choices because he’d been there the whole time. I’d never had to actually explain myself to anyone. “Corporate law.”

  “What does that mean?”

  The soothing feel of his hand stroking my back helped to settle the churning in my stomach.

  “When I graduate and pass the bar, I can be hired by a big corporation. There I can help defend against litigation or lawsuits, or if the company gets into trouble, I’ll be part of the team to get them out.”

  Seth stayed quiet until I couldn’t stand it anymore.

  “What?”

  He still said nothing.

  I pushed up onto my hands and glared down at him. “Okay, what about you? What are your big life dreams?”

  This turn in our perfect day made my head hurt. I didn’t want to fight with him, didn’t even really know why I was so mad. But then his expression changed from guarded to open, where I saw a glimmer of hope.

  “On the few days I let myself think past all the shit going on right now . . . sometimes I think I’d like to be a coach maybe. There was this guy when I was around seven or eight, coached my baseball team. I was only on the team for a year, and even then, I almost had to quit. We didn’t have any money for gear, and when I told Coach that, he said he had some extra stuff lying around. A glove. A uniform. I was too young to realize that that shit was way too new to have been lying around, but now I see what he did.

  “So I played and got better and Coach said I might have a shot at a scholarship if I kept at it. He was the only person in my life who said I could do something better. Freshman year is when everything started to turn to shit at home. I ran into him a couple of years after that, and he asked if I was still playing. I felt like I disappointed him when I said no, but he only shook my hand and told me not to give up. Obviously I did at some point, but it’s still there sometimes, in the back of my head. That I could help some kid do better, ya know.”

  All the anger I had vanished. He sounded like he didn’t believe he should want something better. Like he didn’t deserve it.

  “I think you’d be great at it.” I lay back and twined my fingers with his.

  After a few minutes I felt him squeeze my hand. “Thank you.”

  “For what?” I leaned in and put my cheek against his chest.

  “For not telling me it’s a stupid idea. For believing in me, I guess. Not used to hearing that.” He stroked his thumb over the back of my hand. “I kinda like it.”

  “I think you could do anything you want.”

  “I think you could do anything you want too.”

  His quiet comment sent my pulse racing. Was I brave enough to change the path I was on? Seth shifted and lay back on his side, facing me and tracing his finger along my jaw.

  “I don’t deserve all this,” he whispered in my ear. “But you’re this light that gives me hope and being with you makes everything feel a lot less like shit. I don’t want to let that go.”

  I had no words. Only feelings, and they were so unexpected that I couldn’t even begin to process them yet. I wanted to try, and I opened my mouth to do it when the theme to Psycho split the air, cutting me off.

  I groaned. “Her timing really sucks.”

  “Who?”

  “My mother.” I rolled over and pulled my phone from my purse. After a deep breath, I pushed Accept. Ignoring her was not an option. She’d only keep calling until I answered.

  “Hello, Mother.”

  “Avery. I was about to hang up. What are you doing? No, never mind. Your father and I are having a few guests over tonight for drinks and hors d’oeuvres, a campaign thing, and we want you to be there. I’ll expect to see you at six o’clock.”

  “It’s a Saturday night,” I burst out. And I’d rather be with Seth, I added silently.

  “And this is your father’s campaign. After your little tantrum, we need to show a united front. Let them see your father won’t waver on his platform, even when it’s his daughter breaking the rules.”

  “I can’t, I have plans.”

  “Avery Eleanor Hartley, this is not a negotiation,” my mother’s cold voice snapped. “You will be here at six o’clock in appropriate evening wear. Am I being clear?”

  I wanted to throw my phone in the lake and scream. But I didn’t have fifteen thousand dollars for restitution, and I certainly could never pay for law school by myself. She had me by the metaphorical balls and she knew it.

  “Avery?”

  “Yes, Mother. I am very aware of my obligations. I’ll be there,” I ground out.

  She didn’t even say goodbye, just disconnected the call.

  “That didn’t sound good,” Seth said. “Everything okay?”

  “It’s a stupid party I have to attend tonight.” I turned away before Seth could
see the tears of frustration burning in my eyes. I didn’t want today to end. I wanted to spend the night with him, wrapped in this cocoon we’d created, not with a bunch of opinionated rich people. “Will you come over after?”

  It was a lot to ask. The party would probably run late. We could just meet up in the morning. That made more sense.

  “Is that what you want?” he asked.

  I really did. “Yes.”

  “Then I’ll be there.”

  I rubbed my hands along my bare arms. The chill from my mother’s call had not washed away yet. “Will you promise me something, Seth?”

  “Anything,” he whispered right next to my ear.

  “Promise me that if you change your mind about this, about us, and you’re not interested anymore, you’ll tell me. Just tell me, okay? I can deal with honesty. I don’t think I could deal with being tossed aside again, like someone’s garbage. Especially not by you.”

  Seth was quiet for too long, and I sucked in a ragged breath. I couldn’t bear to look at him. He owed me nothing, no explanation if he wanted to bail. He didn’t ask for any of this. I knew he wanted me physically, that wasn’t the problem.

  The problem was that I wanted more than just a few nights of sex.

  And that confused and scared the crap out of me.

  These feelings swirling around inside me, making me feel ill, were nothing at all like I had felt for Grant. My skin never exploded with goose bumps when he touched me; I never felt weak in the knees when we kissed.

  I sort of enjoyed sex with Grant, but it wasn’t mind shattering, not like those trashy romance novels make you think it should be. I never thought it could be this good until last night, with Seth.

  Already I craved his kisses. His touch. What would happen if he pulled away from me? My chest ached at the thought.

  That night at O’Malley’s had been about letting go and doing something crazy with a stranger. I had accepted that maybe the timing was all wrong. Then Seth was there. On Monday morning, in the Public Works lobby, I found him again.

  What were the chances? I was a realist, I liked facts. Honestly, the odds of seeing Seth again, in a city this size, were small at best. And yet there he was.