The only place I know to go and to maybe get some insight is to the horses.
I plan to stick around the barn after my lesson with Christian. Maybe one of the horses will tell me something.
By the time I tack Harmony up and head to the jump arena, Christian is already there.
“Hey, Vivienne, you doing okay?”
I shrug. “I guess. If anything, what happened to Joel has given me a new perspective.”
“How so?”
“Remember the talk you had with me after Martina disappeared?”
“Yeah.”
“How you said that life would get in the way, and if I really wanted to be successful at this then I would have to maintain a level of focus that wouldn’t necessarily allow life to intrude?”
“It’s a good speech, right?” He smiles gently.
“It is. I’ve decided that I don’t want life to get in the way of my riding.” I feel tears start springing into my eyes. Emotion wants to take hold of me so often these days.
Christian looks up at me. He sighs and purses his lips together. “What I said isn’t completely correct. The thing is, Vivienne, life does sometimes get in the way. It just does. I know how badly you want this. I know what this horse and this sport means to you, but after losing the fiancée I loved, I am telling you as your teacher, your coach, and as your friend, that sometimes you can’t stop life from intruding. And that’s okay. Just don’t let it take over. Understand?”
I nod, but I am not sure that I do understand. If I really pay close attention to everything around me right now, I don’t know how to keep from losing my focus.
“Good. Let’s get you on the job here and warm her up, then send her over the cross rails. We’ll build from that.”
I do as I am told, and the lesson moves along very well, until the sun begins to go down. Christian has set a good little course for us. We are to first do the vertical to the oxer, then the gate, then do a rollback to the chevron.
Harmony does fine over the first three jumps, but as we do the rollback turn and head toward the chevron, she swerves out to the left.
“Go back and do it again,” Christian says.
As we come back around, he instructs, “Left leg on, open that right rein a bit, and keep her straight. No, no, come at this straight, Vivienne.”
I don’t understand what Harmony is doing. We approach the jump, but she takes it two strides out and knocks the jump.
Christian sets it again. “One more time. Let’s do this right. Focus. Keep her straight to the jump, look straight ahead. More leg and open that right rein up.”
I do exactly as he says, but just as we take off, Harmony shows me her eye in my mind, and even though she’s done this jump correctly finally, I get off her right away and take a look at her eye. There it is. Again. The small pen-point-size dot that I had seen a few months ago is back and it is larger. This must have been what was bothering her when we jumped out in Lexington.
Christian walks over. “What’s wrong?”
I sigh. “Look. Look at her eye.”
Christian peers at it. “Ah. Looks like a uveal cyst. It must be blocking her vision some. It can be taken care of.”
“Great. My mom is a vet,” I blurt out.
“I know.”
“Any chance that the Fairmonts might let her take a look?”
“Worth a try.”
“I’ll ask.”
He puts his arm around me and says, “It will be okay. We can get this fixed. She’ll be fine.”
“Thank you.” It has been so long since I felt a fatherly-type figure comfort me that I don’t know how to act, but I can admit that it is nice, even though the situation sucks. It does explain a lot, though. Clearly, this eye problem has been brewing for some time. Another problem—although I guess the silver lining is that it’s something a vet can help her with.
I put Harmony up, and before calling my mom about Harmony, head to talk to a few of my favorite horses. I am just praying one of them has some information for me.
I try Melody first. But all I get is that damn blue color that then turns to turquoise. As I try hard to convey my own thoughts to her, I realize how sad she must be, and I decide to just allow her to be a horse and give her attention and affection. “It’s okay, sweet girl. Your kid loved you a lot. He really did. I’m so sorry.”
“Vivienne?”
I turn around to see Kayla standing there. “Oh, hi. I was, ahh, just talking to Melody.”
She nods. “Did she say anything back?”
I have been asked this before, of course—Riley said the very same thing to me once. But he’d spoken in jest. There is something about the way Kayla’s voice sounds that puts me on guard.
“Um, no,” I say.
“I know,” Kayla replies. “I know about you.”
“What?”
“I know about your gift, Vivienne.”
“I don’t understand.”
She takes a step closer and brushes her long blonde hair back behind her shoulders. “I talk to horses, too, and yes, they talk back. I knew there was someone here that was talking to them, and it took me some time to figure out who it was.”
I shake my head.
“Don’t deny it, sweetie.”
I stare at her, and for the first time I am scared of Kayla Fairmont. I mean, I was kind of afraid when I thought she might kick me out of school after I practically tried to blackmail her into buying Melody for Joel. But this is a different kind of fear. I don’t like the tone of her voice at all.
“You don’t have to say anything. Here is the thing, though, about communicating with horses. You don’t have enough skill and insight yet to really understand how to handle it. Your own thoughts, imaginings, and perceptions can get in the way. You have to be responsible about that. Otherwise, there can be serious problems in interpreting the communication. Sometimes, Vivienne, you need to allow horses to just be horses because, at the end of the day, they are not human.”
It hits me in this moment that all of the color sequencing, all of the gray shading and murkiness—in short, all of the confusion that I have felt from these animals over this semester is because of Kayla. She has blocked them in some way.
“Okay,” I say.
“Good. Let them be horses. They have jobs to do. They aren’t humans, and it is not their responsibility to take care of us. Be smart about this. You have a big future in front of you. Good night.”
“Good night.”
I stand there for several minutes as she walks away, and I wonder now about everything she has said to me. What is right, and what is wrong? I have been talking to horses since I was a five. Why and how did Kayla Fairmont put a block between me and these animals? Is she being protective as she suggested, or is she being manipulative for some reason? Does Kayla have something to hide?
CHAPTER fifty-nine
The school year has come to an end with all of its up and downs and many unanswered questions.
The local vet has looked at Harmony’s eye and confirmed the presence of a cyst. There hasn’t been a decision yet to remove it, but I think there will be. The vet did say that she can go to Liberty Farms with me this summer and that the cyst won’t grow rapidly. Apparently, I am a good enough rider to give her the confidence she needs to go over the jumps, so I’ll wait it out with her until the Fairmonts decide what to do about the problem. I may not have paid for Harmony, but I know in my heart that she belongs to me. That is the truth.
I feel a lot weighing on me as I pack up my things to go home for two weeks before heading to Virginia—Harmony’s eye, Kayla’s knowledge of my gift and all that swirls around that, my confusion where Tristan and Riley are concerned—and topping it all off is the ever-present awareness that my friend is dead. Joel is gone and I miss him.
I wish more than an
ything in this world that I could forget all of this and just go and ride. But my conscience tells me that I would not be a decent human if I didn’t follow my gut, which means that as soon as I get to Liberty Farms this summer, I’ll start looking for answers about what really happened to Joel.
I am packing up my things when my cell rings. Tristan. I take the call. “Hello.”
“I need to see you.”
“Okay.”
We agree to meet in the tack room in a half hour.
He is already there when I arrive. He looks like he has been crying. He stands up from the tack trunk when I walk in, and he puts his arms around me. I hug him back. “Vivienne, I love you and I can’t lose you. Please, please forgive me. Can’t we please go back to the way things were? I will never keep a secret from you again. I will never betray you again. I promise. I really do.”
I look at him and then up at the ceiling in the tack room, and I believe him. I start to cry. “Yes. Fine. I don’t want to be mad anymore. I don’t want this to keep us apart, but if you ever lie to me again . . . if you ever keep . . . or do . . .”
He brings a finger to my lips. “I won’t. I promise,” he says and he seals it with a kiss.
CHAPTER sixty
Who knew the second semester at Fairmont would be more insane than the first? But it has been; I admit that much to myself in the moment I walk down the Jetway to board the airplane home. I’ll only have two weeks to unwind there before I leave for Virginia, but I’m hoping that’s enough time to get back to being me again.
I find my seat on the plane and pull out my cell phone. I need to talk to Tristan. I feel so much better about us, and I trust him again. It’s one problem off my shoulders.
A text comes in as I’m about to make the call. It’s from a blocked number. It reads: Thought you might want to know.
There is a photo. It’s of Tristan and he is asleep in bed, but it isn’t his bed. I study the photo for a minute and take in the nightstand next to the bed.
I swallow hard.
There’s that saying, a picture is worth a thousand words—and for the first time I really understand how true it is. On the nightstand is a photo of a horse that I recognize: Lydia’s horse, Geisha. Tristan is asleep in Lydia’s bed.
I fight back tears. So everything he said before I left was a lie. One big, stupid lie, and if Tristan was protecting anything or anyone at all, it was Lydia and himself. Was he even being honest with me about his dad and mom? Was any part of what he said true? I feel so duped. What was last night even all about? How could I have fallen for all of that?
Thoughts run wildly through my mind. Thoughts of getting even, but that’s not me. That’s not right.
I close my eyes and wonder how in the world I am going to make it through the summer with them. Maybe I shouldn’t go.
No. That isn’t the answer. There are a few reasons why I need to go to Liberty Farms. The first is that I am resolved to find out the real truth behind Joel’s death, and I think there are answers at Liberty Farms.
Second, going out to Virginia will bring me that much closer to achieving my goals. I know it. It would be stupid to pass up the opportunity just because I’ve been lied to by someone I thought cared for me. Loved me.
This thought makes me cry in earnest, and the poor woman who has just sat down next to me is shifting uncomfortably in her seat. I face the window.
I should have followed my one freaking rule. The one I’ve wanted to live by ever since I realized that humans can really hurt other humans—which I adopted, big surprise, when my dad left. I’ll never forget my mom spending night after night trying to cover up the fact that she was in tears. My rule has been: focus on your goals. Get it done. Christian was right the first time he talked to me—never let life interfere.
I’m going back to that. Going back to my rules. No guys to interfere. None. Nope. Not allowed.
My cell phone dings again. I shake my head, not wanting to look at it, but morbid curiosity gets the best of me. What photo will I see now? Tristan and Lydia making out? Or worse?
I take a deep breath and look down. Whoa.
I read the text and reread it.
It’s from Austen.
Hey, V, guess who is on as a working student at Liberty Farms this summer? I’ll be seeing you soon.
“Crap,” I mutter under my breath. “Just what I needed.”
But I can’t fool myself, because even as I’m saying those words, there is a tingle down my spine that goes straight to my toes. I wipe my tears away, and try to tell myself this feeling is the opposite of what is right. Austen Giles is my friend. That is it. Getting a text from him is not supposed to make me want to faint. And he is definitely not supposed to be going to Liberty Farms.
“Damn,” I say—a little too loud.
The woman next to me glances over. She probably thinks I have Tourette’s syndrome.
I shake my head and turn off my phone, knowing that if there is any guy in this world who might be able to get me to break my rules, then it’s the one who just texted me.
GLOSSARY
air vest: An air vest is a safety vest used in the cross-country event. A strap hooks on to the saddle, and if the rider becomes disengaged in a fall, the vest acts much like an air bag, and inflates around the neck and spine of the rider immediately upon disengagement.
airy: The term “airy” before an eventing obstacle (such as “airy hanging log” or “airy plank”) means that an obstacle is set above the ground with a clear, free space below it.
airy verticals: This particular jump possesses an open design, which makes it appear much higher compared to a normal vertical jump and thus more challenging to the horse.
bank jumps, bank steps: Bank jumps are steps up and down from one level to another, and can be single jumps or built as a “staircase” of multiple banks.
bay: The color of a horse. Bay horses’ coats are a deep red to mahogany brown with black legs, mane, tail, and muzzle, called points.
bedded: Bedding for horses may be straw or wood shavings. Riders will bed the horse’s stall frequently.
big cabin: a wooden fence on a cross-country course built to resemble a log cabin
bounce: A bounce, also called a no-stride, is a fence combination sometimes found on the cross-country course of eventing. It consists of two fences placed close together so the horse cannot take a full stride between them, but not so close that the horse would jump both fences at once. The horse “bounces” between the two jumps, landing with his hind legs before immediately taking off with his front legs.
building stride: moving forward and lengthening the horse’s stride
chestnut: the color of a horse; chestnut is a reddish-brown color
chevrons on the mounds: Also called arrowheads, these fences are shaped like triangles, with the point facing toward the ground. They are generally very narrow, and usually only a few feet wide.
cleaning tack: cleaning the saddle and bridle
coffin canter: short, choppy strides to balance out to the coffin jump
coffin combination: Also called the rails-ditch-rails, the coffin is a combination fence where the horse jumps a set of rails, moves one or several strides downhill to a ditch, then goes back uphill to another jump.
course: Vivienne will have to maneuver two kinds of courses. One is a cross-country, with solid obstacles to jump. The other is a show jumping course, where the rider and horse have various obstacles to jump. Instructors may describe the course to the riders during a practice session, or the rider must learn it through walking it on the ground and studying it via diagram when competing.
cross-country: A popular phase of three-day eventing, cross-country is a timed event that requires the rider to walk the course previous to the ride and to memorize it. Horse and rider need to be in optimum physical shape as well as courageo
us and very trusting of each other. This phase consists of approximately twelve to twenty fences (at lower levels), or thirty to forty at the higher levels, placed on a long outdoor circuit. These fences consist of solid objects (logs, stone walls, etc.) as well as various obstacles such as water obstacles, ditches, drops and ditches, and various jumping combinations one might find in the countryside. Sometimes, particularly at higher levels, fences are designed that would not normally occur in nature. However, these are still constructed to be as solid as more natural obstacles. Safety regulations require that some obstacles be built with a “frangible pin system,” allowing part or all of the jump to collapse if hit with enough impact. Speed is also a factor, with the rider required to cross the finish line within a certain time frame (optimum time). Crossing the finish line after the optimum time results in penalties for each second over. At lower levels, there is also a speed fault time, incurring penalties for horse-and-rider pairs completing the course too quickly. Going off course and refusal of jumps also result in penalties. After three refusals, or after missing a jump by going off course, the horse and rider will be eliminated.
cross-ties: A tie on each side that clips into the horse’s halter to aid in grooming and tacking up.
dressage: Dressage consists of riding the horse through an exact sequence of movements in a square arena where letters are placed around the arena. The rider must memorize the test and perform different movements at the different letters. The test is evaluated by one or more judges who are looking for balance, rhythm, suppleness, and, most important, obedience of the horse and its harmony with the rider.
Each movement in the test is scored on a scale from zero to ten, with a score of ten being the highest possible mark and with the total maximum score for the test varying depending on the level of competition and the number of movements. Therefore, if one movement is poorly executed, it is still possible for the rider to achieve a good overall score if the remaining movements are very well executed.
Dark Harmony: A Vivienne Taylor Horse Lover's Mystery (Fairmont Riding Academy Book 2) Page 26