More Than A Feeling (The Boston Five Series #3)

by Poppy J. Anderson

  “Mm-hm.” She offered him a weak smile and gave him a wide berth as she stepped out of the shower to stand in front of the sink. “Everything’s fine.”

  “I see.” He could hear the grumpy tone in his own voice.

  And then he watched her avoid eye contact as she toweled her hair dry in silence.

  Only a few hours earlier, they’d had passionate, mind-blowing sex, he’d poured out his heart to her, and then they’d fallen asleep in each other’s arms, and now she was acting as if he were nothing but a casual acquaintance, who happened to be naked while she was brushing her teeth and hiding her curves under an oversized towel.

  Her nervous voice confirmed his impression. “Would you please leave the bathroom? I want to get ready.”

  He frowned and crossed his arms, an uncomfortable feeling creeping up on him. “What’s wrong, Kayleigh?”

  “Nothing’s wrong,” she replied much too quickly, meeting his eyes in the mirror over the sink. “I simply want to get ready now.”

  Aidan snorted, really upset now. “In case you don’t remember, we had sex last night. I’d assume we’ve passed the bashful stage.”

  With a sigh, she turned around to face him, folding her hands in front of her body as if she didn’t know what to do with them, and nibbled her lower lip almost shyly. “Listen, Aidan, I just think that last night wasn’t such a good idea.”

  He was silent, staring at her.

  He could see her throat move as she swallowed. It was weird how she couldn’t meet his eyes for more than a second. “This sex thing complicates everything. You’re Thorne’s brother, and I’m Shane’s sister …”

  “What do our siblings have to do with anything?” Aidan asked scornfully. “We’re both adults, and we’re not committing incest.”

  “But I think it feels weird,” she insisted, sounding utterly dishonest.

  “You think it feels weird?” An eyebrow went up. “The only weird part is that last night I didn’t get this impression from you at all.”

  “Don’t make this so hard for me,” she pleaded and took a step toward him. “Aidan, I like you. I really like you.”

  He knew what was coming, but for some reason asked anyway. “But?”

  “But …” She shrugged sheepishly. “We shouldn’t turn this into more than it is. We get along great, you live in my house, and yesterday … yesterday we had sex, and that was a stupid idea, and it shouldn’t happen again.”

  “Ah.” A throbbing sensation sprang up behind his temple as he realized what she was trying to tell him in a somewhat roundabout way. He’d known the whole time that someone like Kayleigh Fitzpatrick was out of his league and would never consider being in a relationship with someone like him—a jailbird, an ex-con, a criminal. Women like Kayleigh, who were clever, funny, and beautiful, who had medical degrees, weren’t made for ex-cons like him. It really was that simple.

  She’d sent him out the door once before; a second time wouldn’t kill him. Maybe this time around, she’d at least offer him a cup of coffee before he went, he thought bitterly.

  “I understand,” he said.

  “Really?” Her face lit up with obvious relief. “No hard feelings between us?”

  “None,” he agreed lamely and nodded at her. “I’ll be in the guest room if you need me.”

  He was already out the door when she called his name hesitantly. “Aidan?”

  “Yes?” He turned around and took in her unsure expression, her nervous smile. “What is it?”

  Kayleigh licked her lips, took a breath, and stepped toward him. “I’m sure you’ll make your dream come true someday.”

  It took him a moment to react, but then he shrugged and gave her a humorless laugh. “Thanks.”

  Chapter 11

  “Heath, could you get Hayden on the phone now please?” Kayleigh implored. She sat on the edge of her bed and looked around the room despondently.

  She was utterly beside herself—she couldn’t believe she’d slept with Aidan. Again.

  But the hopelessly rumpled sheets, her clothes on the floor, and the hickeys on her throat were mercilessly unequivocal in telling her that she had, indeed, slept with Aidan again, sent him packing again, and couldn’t even blame the alcohol on her sexual escapade this time, either. She didn’t care that it was still early; she needed to discuss the chaos in her life with her best friend.

  Unfortunately, her oldest brother was a little slow this early in the morning.

  “She’s changing Kayla’s diaper,” his tired voice informed her. She could hear him munching on some snack as he spoke. “Why are you calling this early anyway? You can drop by and discuss it later. Whatever it is that you need to discuss.”

  “But I need to talk to her now!”

  “She’s upstairs with Kayla,” Heath protested, sounding distracted. She heard the sound of the TV in the background, indicating that that was how her brother spent his morning, while Hayden took care of the kids.

  Kayleigh rolled her eyes in irritation. “Then take Kayla out of her hands and tell her I need to talk to her, Heath!” she barked. “Now.”

  “Jesus, Kayleigh,” Heath mumbled. “Alright, alright. No need to murder me over the phone, you know.”

  “If I were planning to murder you, you’d know,” she promised seriously, eliciting only a guffaw from the idiot on the other end. Then the line went quiet. As soon as Hayden’s amiable voice came on, however, Kayleigh dropped backwards onto her bed and stared up at the ceiling in resignation.

  “Hey, Kayleigh! What’s going on?”

  “Aidan and I had sex,” she announced without prior warning.

  As could be expected, she heard the shocked gasp of her sister-in-law, who’d also been her best friend since early childhood. “What?”

  “Aidan and I had sex,” she repeated. “And we also made out. I think Mr. Willoughby from across the street saw everything.”

  Hayden gasped again. “What? Mr. Willoughby watched you have sex?”

  “No, of course not,” Kayleigh protested with a frown and then swallowed. “But he watched us make out. The curtains in his living room were moving. I saw it!”

  “Kayleigh,” Hayden groaned in frustration. “I don’t understand a word you’re saying! Please start at the beginning. You just had sex with Aidan—”

  “No,” she interrupted with a sigh. “I mean … yes, I did. We had sex, like, seven or eight months ago. And then again last night.”

  “Excuse me?”

  Kayleigh chewed on her lower lip, weighed down by the tangle of the story, but not at all bashful about telling her friend what was going through her head. “I found out he’d just been released from prison when we first met, so I figured that was the reason he was so ravenous that night … but last night it was exactly the same.”

  “For God’s sake,” Hayden croaked, flabbergasted. “Are you drunk?”

  “I wish I was,” Kayleigh said miserably.

  It was dead silent on the other end, until Kayleigh heard a door creak, and then Hayden heaved a sigh. “I’m in the bedroom so Heath doesn’t hear me. Alright, now I want the full story, Kayleigh. Start at the beginning, please.”

  “Okay,” she murmured despondently, pressing her favorite snuggle-pillow against her stomach. “But you gotta promise you won’t tell anyone. Not even Heath.”

  “Are you insane?” Hayden barked. “If I told your brother you had sex with a man who served time and is now living under your roof, he’d beat up Aidan at Shane’s wedding. Of course I won’t tell him!”

  The fact that Hayden mentioned Aidan’s prison sentence made Kayleigh pout grimly. “What does this have to do with Aidan’s sentence?” she protested with great vehemence.

  “You know what your brothers are like—”

  “If you mean to tell me they’re insensitive, big-headed idiots who think they’re God’s gift to mankind, you’re not telling me anything I don’t already know,” she growled angrily, though she didn’t even understand why she was s
o close to flipping out.

  “Kayleigh, they only want to protect you.”

  She snorted scornfully. “From Aidan?”

  “I don’t know,” her sister-in-law admitted. “But because he served time, none of them would be thrilled that you went out with him.”

  “First of all, it’s none of their business who I go out with,” she said, feeling herself growing more furious by the minute. “And second, that would make them the most intolerant, stupid blockheads I’ve ever met!”

  “Calm down, Kayleigh. I’m only guessing what would happen.”

  That didn’t make her calmer. Kayleigh possessed the same temper that was the curse of all the Fitzpatricks. “Nobody tells me who I can and can’t sleep with!”

  “I don’t think your brothers would dare set rules for your sex life, Kayleigh,” Hayden said dryly. “None of them has a death wish, you know.”

  “Jesus, Hayden,” Kayleigh groaned. “That’s not even funny.”

  “In a way, it is, considering how hotly you’re defending Aidan right now. So what is really behind this urgent call?”

  Kayleigh drew up her legs and whined into the phone. “I told you! Aidan and I had sex several months ago, and now we went and did it again!”

  “And?”

  “And? What do you mean, and? I’m asking you what to do!” Torn between the urge to hit the wall and the urge to hide under the covers, she fumed, “It’s all Ryan’s fault! If he hadn’t insisted that Aidan stay at my house, this whole mess wouldn’t have happened!”

  “Remember, I asked you to start at the beginning,” Hayden said, irritation creeping into her voice. “How is Ryan responsible for you having sex with Aidan?”

  Kayleigh made a face and sighed impatiently. “Alright, story time. A few months ago I was at O’Reary’s, met a nice guy, and took him home. The next morning, I sent him packing—”

  “Very classy, Kayleigh,” Hayden cut in with a chuckle.

  “That’s what you do after a one-night stand,” Kayleigh lectured, suppressing her guilty conscience. “But how could you know that?” she added mockingly. “You and Heath have been together since kindergarten.”

  “Exactly,” Hayden replied gleefully, not taking offense at all. “And now I know why.”

  “Very funny. Are we done with the amusement yet?”

  “Yes, go on. This is a lot more interesting than my usual morning routine.”

  Kayleigh went on with her story. “So I assumed I would never see my one-night stand again, but then suddenly it turned out he’s Thorne’s brother. Before I knew what hit me, my dear brother Ryan declares that Aidan can live in my guest room until he’s found a place of his own. And now look at this mess. Everything’s screwed up.”

  “Because you had sex?”

  “Yes!” she snapped. “You don’t understand, Hayden,” she explained desperately. “He’s nice, funny, helpful, and obliging, and also damn hot.”

  “Oh, that sounds really terrible. Have you called the authorities yet?”

  Kayleigh felt like screaming. “Hayden!”

  “I don’t see the problem,” Hayden said calmly. “Is it so bad that he’s nice and funny and helpful and sexy?”

  Instead of answering, Kayleigh cried, “What am I supposed to do now?”

  After half a minute of silence, her friend cleared her throat. “Risking the wrath of your Catholic mother, I suggest you continue to sleep with him. It seems like that’s what you want to do anyway, otherwise you wouldn’t have called me, and you wouldn’t be this agitated.”

  Kayleigh rubbed her face. “Hayden—”

  “What’s the big deal?” her sister-in-law cut her off lightly. “If you get along and don’t want to make it official, you can just have sex as often as you want. You have my blessing.”

  “Thanks a lot,” Kayleigh said with tired irony.

  “Well, what’s the con to continuing to have sex with him?”

  That was an excellent question. If she looked at it rationally, there was no con. Quite the contrary. The man she’d thrown out of her bathroom half an hour earlier, even though he made her pulse race and her heart flutter like no one else ever had, was actually extraordinarily nice, funny, helpful, and hot. She enjoyed spending time with him, enjoyed their conversations, and liked him a lot. Maybe a little too much, considering she was going to her brother’s wedding with another man. She felt cheap for having been in bed with Aidan without a thought of Alec. And now she felt less than thrilled at the prospect of her date with Alec, which she should’ve felt jubilant about. Right?

  And why did her guilty conscience have nothing to do with Alec, but everything to do with Aidan?

  Embarrassed, reluctant, and utterly sheepish, Kayleigh grumbled, “I’m going to the wedding with Alec.”

  “Alec?”

  “Yes,” she said, reacting to Hayden’s irritated question with a grudging monosyllable. “Alec.”

  “But why would you do that?”

  Kayleigh blinked in surprise at Hayden’s flabbergasted tone. She took a deep breath and finally confided in her best friend. “Because I’ve been in love with him for almost three years, Hayden.”

  “What?”

  Kayleigh ground her teeth. “I’ve been in love with Alec for almost three years,” she repeated.

  There was a long moment of silence. “Don’t be silly,” Hayden said severely, a hint of accusation in her voice. “You’re not in love with Alec Anderson.”

  The surprise took Kayleigh’s breath away. Speechless and dumbfounded, she stared at the receiver, searching for the right words. “What? What the hell are you talking about? I would know who I’m in love with, don’t you think?”

  “Kayleigh,” Hayden said good-naturedly, “I’m not denying you’re attracted to Alec in some way. Probably all women think he’s attractive—including your mom, Thorne, and myself. But that man is far too snotty for you.”

  Kayleigh couldn’t believe her ears. “What?”

  “Oh, come on! I like Alec, don’t get me wrong here, but he’s a little too focused on good looks and all that …”

  “Does that mean I’m ugly?”

  “Fuck, no!”

  Once again, Kayleigh was having a hard time believing her ears. Her sweet, charming friend Hayden using that kind of language was certainly a first.

  “You’re not ugly! Don’t let anyone tell you a thing like that, Kayleigh.”

  “But you—”

  “Haven’t you ever noticed the kind of women Alec runs around with?” Hayden asked ominously. “Or the speed with which he changes girlfriends?”

  “Of course I have,” Kayleigh admitted reluctantly. “But that doesn’t have to mean anything.”

  “Right. It doesn’t have to.” Hayden sighed deeply. “Have you ever talked to one of those girlfriends? None of them have struck me as being able to hold a meaningful conversation, and they aren’t funny, either. Do you know what Heath calls them?”

  “I have no idea,” Kayleigh groaned. The conversation was getting more annoying by the minute.

  “He calls them ‘Jeannies,’ from I Dream of Jeannie, the show. And do you want to know why?”

  “Because they’re all blond and scantily dressed?” Kayleigh guessed lamely.

  “No,” Hayden said hollowly. “Heath calls them Jeannies because Alec only calls them out of the bottle when it’s convenient for him, and also because apparently Alec needs a woman to moon over him and call him ‘master.’ As soon as he’s done with one of them, he puts her back in the bottle and forgets her.”

  “What are you trying to tell me?” Kayleigh snapped, but of course she knew the answer to that question.

  “You are far too intelligent, independent, and liberated to let anyone degrade you to a Jeannie,” Hayden said gently. “Why do you want to be with a man who enjoys being anyone’s master, Kayleigh? You don’t need that. And what’s more, you certainly wouldn’t have made out with another man on your front porch if you were really in love with
Alec Anderson.”

  Kayleigh loved her sister-in-law like a genuine sister, but right now she couldn’t take her astuteness. She hung up.

  ***

  Aidan was angry with his sister for coercing him into taking part in this rehearsal dinner. Now he was sitting in Ellen Fitzpatrick’s dining room with Thorne, her fiancé, and the entire Fitzpatrick family, to taste all the dishes the catering firm could potentially serve at the wedding. In his opinion, it was bullshit to sample the wedding food a few days ahead of time, and it was even greater bullshit to force your closest family members to do the same. He could think of many better ways to spend his time than sitting here with a bunch of people he didn’t belong with, eating tiny spinach things, and frantically wondering what to say so he could at least make some small talk.

  And to top it all off, they’d placed him opposite Kayleigh.

  They’d been avoiding each other ever since they’d had sex the day before yesterday. That was surprisingly easy to do, since Kayleigh had worked a long shift yesterday, and Aidan had thrown himself headlong into the hunt for an apartment, but that didn’t change the regrettable fact that their amicable relationship was gone.

  Right now, he couldn’t imagine roaming a hardware store with her, picking out wallpaper patterns, or going to a baseball game.

  No, he had slept with her, bared his soul to her, and gotten his hopes up that she might reciprocate his feelings, but had been rebuffed politely, yet no less determinedly.

  He knew his place. It certainly wasn’t at Kayleigh Fitzpatrick’s side.

  “We definitely need to offer this tuna salad, honey,” Shane interrupted Aidan’s thoughts, nodding enthusiastically at Thorne, who was bustling about the room. “You can leave the spinach squares for all I care, but the tuna salad should definitely be on the menu.”

  “I like the steamed dumplings best,” Ryan said, chewing loudly.

  “Ryan, that’s the tenth time you’ve told us,” Thorne sighed. “I heard you the first time. Your dumplings have made the list.”

  “Great,” her soon-to-be brother-in-law said and then grinned at Aidan, who was sitting before a plate filled with all manner of foods. He’d been told to sample each of them but didn’t feel like stuffing himself full.