"Ford," I murmured in sympathy.
He pressed his hands over mine, his eyes searing into mine pleadingly. "You know that I would never hurt you. Right? If I go too far when we play, promise me you'll always tell me. I don't ever want to hurt you."
His doubt in himself broke my heart, and hardened it against his father even more. I treasured the intimacy we shared when he dominated me, and the trust that went both ways. I trusted Ford with my body and my heart. I knew he would never intentionally hurt me, and if he did accidentally, he sure as hell wouldn't get off on it. He'd proven to me time and again that he cherished the submission I gave him. Every time I used my safe word, he honored it immediately and unquestioningly. His dad was an asshole, and I wished I could give the man a piece of my mind right now.
"Don't you dare let that man make you doubt yourself," I snapped out angrily as I held his gaze firmly. "What we do together is consensual and amazing. You've never hurt me, and you always honor our safe words. I trust you with all that I am, and our play makes me feel closer to you, loved by you. You're perfect for me just the way you are. I love every demanding dominant part of you, Ford Spencer. Don't let anyone make you think it's wrong or something to be ashamed of."
"Holy hell, I love you, Jenny," he said in relief as his eyes softened with affection. "You're perfect for me too."
"I know." I gave him an impish smile. "Show me." I wiggled in his lap to tease and arouse him again. I'd never been with a man who could recover as quickly as Ford did. I was a very lucky woman.
"You realize that you're poking the bear right?" he asked in dark amusement as a corner of his mouth quirked up. It was a relief to see that the doubt that was in his eyes a moment ago was long gone now. I could feel his cock getting hard again underneath me.
"As long as I end up getting poked in the end," I answered wickedly, "I think it's worth the risk."
His eyes narrowed threateningly. "You are a very bad girl." His deep rumbling voice dripped with arousal.
"Maybe you should spank me?" I asked suggestively, wanting to prove to him that I trusted him completely. I met his eyes fearlessly.
He growled low in his throat, his indigo eyes darkening to blue-black. "Bring me two silk scarves from your room," he announced in a stern tone that brooked no argument. "Now," he added demandingly.
"Yes, sir," I replied breathlessly as I practically leaped out of his arms and hurried to my room.
I ached to have his hand stinging my ass. I needed this release from my troubles and worries, and to lose myself in Ford for a little longer. I needed to feel and not think for a while, before reality bit me in the ass, and thoughts of Carter's blackmail took over my head again, like it'd been doing before Ford showed up tonight. A shudder ran through me as I entered my room and an unwanted image of Carter's smug grin filled my head. A trapped and helpless feeling hit me hard, and I struggled to push it down as I stopped in front of my dresser to stare unseeingly at it.
I still hadn't figured out a way to talk my brother into Carter's deal. Andy had instantly recognized that Carter couldn't be trusted. My brother's instincts were sharp and always spot on, and he knew it. How was I going to convince him otherwise, when he was right? Dread billowed up inside me, and it made me feel ill. I didn't want to lie to my family anymore, but what other choice did I have?
"I'm waiting, Jen," Ford called out sharply from the other room, stopping my churning mind in its tracks. "Don't turn this into an actual punishment."
Yikes, that was the last thing I wanted right now. I hurriedly pulled the drawer open and snatched up two of my long silk scarves, then rushed out of my room, eager to have nothing but thoughts of Ford in my head.
Ford was standing in front of my kitchen table waiting for me with his arms crossed, and a stern expression on his face. His shirt was off now, and he looked delicious in only his jeans. I let my eyes caress his body, from his wide chest and muscular tattooed arms down to his long powerful legs. I could see his massive erection clearly through the denim. Holy shit, he looked like a sex God, and I wanted to worship and adore him.
I stopped in front of him and dropped to my knees without giving it a thought, and held the scarves up to him like an offering. I watched his eyes light up with pleasure as he took them from me. He reached down and dragged his knuckles gently across my cheek. Affection softened his gaze, his love washing over me in a warm tide that made me feel safe and cherished. Nothing else mattered right now.
"Up." His voice was rough with arousal. He motioned with his hand, and I instantly obeyed. "I want you bent over the table." He stepped aside, and I could see that he'd already cleared off my kitchen table for his use.
I stepped up to the edge of the round table and laid my upper body across the dark wood. My nipples pebbled when they made contact with the cool surface.
"Arms up, Jen," he commanded. I stretched my arms up and gripped the edge of the tabletop. Ford rounded the table and tied one of the scarves around my wrist. I let out a soft sigh of contentment as he pulled tension on the scarf and bound me to one of the table legs. I watched in a haze of desire as he did the same to my other wrist.
He walked back around behind me, trailing his fingers down my spine in a soft yet possessive caress that ended with him grabbing a handful of my ass. He growled low in his throat. "I'm not going to do it today," he rumbled out seductively as his fingers slowly slid between my cheeks. "But very soon," One of his fingers ghosted across my asshole as he bent over me, his lips close to my ear, "I'm going to fuck this ass," he whispered with erotic promise.
A shudder of arousal traveled through me, a low moan escaping my mouth.
"You want that too, don't you?" His breath caressed my neck. The heat of his body radiated into mine. His lips brushed feather-soft against my skin.
"Yes, sir," I whimpered softly, desire pumping through me like liquid fire.
He straightened and cool air hit my back, followed by the sudden unexpected sting of his hand connecting with my ass. I squealed in surprise, and Ford chuckled darkly. Two more blows followed in quick succession, my body bucking with each one, before his fingers slid between my thighs and found my wet molten core.
"So goddamn wet," he growled out. "So fucking perfect." He pressed into my clit with slow lazy circles that weren't enough to quench the fire inside me.
"Please," I mewled needily as I wiggled my hips.
His palm cracked down on my ass twice, the loud sharp noise filling the room along with my gasping cries of pleasure over the delightful sting of each blow. His hand immediately rubbed soothing circles over my heated skin, turning the sting into warm bliss.
"Ford," I whimpered shakily as I raised up on my toes, eager for more.
His fingers found my pussy again, and he groaned deep in his throat. "You're fucking soaked, Jen. You love this, don't you?"
"Yes, sir. More, sir," I moaned desperately.
"That's my good girl."
He began spanking me in earnest, periodically teasing and tormenting my swollen sex and engorged clit, edging me closer and closer to release but keeping me just shy of it. My ass felt hot and sensitive, and my body strung tight almost to the breaking point. The sweet torture fed me body and soul, and it quickly got to the point where I couldn't take much more. I needed to come so badly, and I began shamelessly pleading and begging for him to let me.
"Please!" I wailed loudly. "Oh please, Ford! Please!" My body shuddered and shook with need. "Let me come, let me come, let me come!" I was so desperate that I was practically sobbing now.
He pulled his hand away from my body, and I heard the distinct sound of his zipper lowering. Oh thank fucking God. I moaned when I felt the wide head of his cock bump against my pussy.
"Yes, yes, yes," I chanted softly, my eyes closed in anticipation.
Then Ford snapped his hips forward, thrusting into me hard and deep, filling up the emptiness inside me, both physically and metaphorically. "Come!" he snarled and my entire world burst into blinding
searing pleasure as my body obeyed.
Blistering heat consumed me as my release swept through me and felt like it split me apart from the inside out. I screamed and wailed as Ford pounded into me over and over again, keeping me flying, the orgasm continuous and overwhelming. Then just as it felt like I would lose myself completely, Ford's rhythm faltered as he neared the end of his control.
"Fuck, Jen!" he bellowed. "Holy motherfucking hell!" He erupted, his cock swelling as he pushed into me one last time, so goddamn deep that it almost hurt. He jerked and spasmed inside me, and I could feel long jets of his warm seed pumping into me. His hands tightened viciously on my hips as his body convulsed violently against me. I reveled in it, wanting his fingers to leave marks on me, to lay claim to me.
I was still coming as his body collapsed on top of mine, both of us shuddering and quaking through the last remnants of our shared orgasm until we were both left utterly spent and gasping for air. I lost myself to the moment, riding the edge of unconsciousness until I realized that Ford had already unbound me from the table and was lowering me onto my bed. Then he was under the covers next to me, pulling me into his warm naked body and cuddling me close before I finally slipped away into a deep dreamless sleep.
**********
I stood by the door out to the Purcell Auto garage wringing my hands and fidgeting on my four-inch heels. My stomach roiled with unease, and my heart felt heavy with guilt. I needed to talk to my brother and try to convince him to go along with Carter's deal, but how was I going to do that if I couldn't keep it together? Andy would know immediately that something was up if he saw me like this. I needed to suck it up. I was doing this to protect him, and I didn't have a choice. I'd been putting it off out of fear since Thursday, but it was Saturday morning now, and I was running out of time. I couldn't take the chance that Carter would cost Lydia her job because I failed.
I let out a harsh breath. "Suck it up, buttercup," I mumbled to myself, then forced myself to walk through the door.
I could hear Andy laughing across the garage, and I strode toward the sound. I rounded a pickup truck to find my brother. He was smiling broadly at Denny as they both leaned in the open hood of the vehicle, joking around about something while they worked. He seemed to be in a really good mood today, and I hoped I wasn't about to ruin it.
"Andy?" I called out in an even voice.
"What can I do for you, oh sister of mine?" His grin was infectious, and I smiled back at him despite my tension over this situation.
"Do you have a minute to talk?"
"Sure." He straightened and handed the tool in his hand to Denny. He gave Denny a bow, and an exaggerated hand flourish. "If you will excuse me, good sir," he said in a ridiculously haughty accent. "The Princess beckons, and I must attend to her wishes."
"As it pleases you, your highness," Denny answered in the same absurd accent. "I shall await your return with bated breath."
"You two are idiots," I grumbled out as rolled my eyes. I continued smiling though. It was hard not to. Andy was a funny guy, but he wouldn't hear that from me. I didn't want to encourage his already inflated ego. I turned and Andy followed me through the garage, then down the hall and into my office.
"How's Ford?" Andy asked as he took a seat in front of my desk.
"He's good." I smiled genuinely as I sat down behind my desk. Thoughts of Ford always made me smile, and I was glad to put this off a little longer.
"Well, from the look on your face right now, I'd say he was a lot more than just good." Andy leaned forward conspiratorially. "He's the one isn't he?" His voice was soft and sincere.
"Yes, he is," I answered quietly as I looked away, his open honest face killing me since I was about to try to manipulate him. Luckily, he took my reaction as embarrassment.
He reached across the desk and grabbed my hand. "Don't be embarrassed to love someone, Jenny. It's not a weakness. It takes a lot of strength to let someone in and trust them with your heart." He squeezed my hand gently. "I'm so happy for you. You're a good person, and you deserve to be happy."
Tears stung my eyes as the guilt stabbed my heart again. I was the shittiest sister ever. "Thanks, Andy," I murmured, wanting to put an end to this topic.
He nodded and leaned back in his chair. "So, what did you want to talk about?" he asked with a curious expression.
Here we go. There was no going back now. All our futures depended on this. I had to make this work. "Why are you fighting this deal with Elliott Bennett?" I asked worriedly. "Dad and I think it's a good thing for all of us. Our future is at stake here, Andy. The dealership is really struggling right now."
His mouth tightened into a hard straight line. "You too?" he asked in exasperation. "Am I the only one who thinks that guy is an arrogant tool?"
"He's a very successful business man," I countered. At least, that wasn't a lie. "I think you're letting your emotions cloud your judgment." As soon as I said it, I felt ill. My brother might get emotional about things, but his good judgment was something that could always be relied on. Questioning him like this was so wrong, and it felt like the guilt was eating me alive from the inside out.
His blue eyes widened in surprise, flickered with hurt, and then anger. "It's our family and our future at stake here, Jenny. There's no way that I can't be emotional about it, but that doesn't mean I can't see Bennett for the spoiled entitled asshat he is. I don't trust him." His words were sharp and emphatic.
"Just promise me you won't completely dismiss the Bennett deal without giving it a chance," I pleaded. "We might not have a choice in the matter."
His eyes narrowed at me, and I could see the gears turning in his head. Shit, had I made him suspicious?
"There's always a choice," he finally said firmly. "Dad already agreed that we should look at other options before deciding on anything."
"Andy-"
"You can't honestly think taking the first deal that comes along without exploring our options is a good idea, can you? Even if I did trust that douche." He shook his head in disbelief. His eyes suddenly softened with concern. "This isn't like you at all. You never just jump into things where work is involved. Is there something you're not telling me?"
Shit, shit, shit. Panic flooded my entire body. "Our financial situation is really bad, and I...I'm just really scared, Andy," I blurted out in a wavering voice. I wished like hell that I could tell him the truth, so he could help me find a way out from under Carter's thumb, but I couldn't risk losing everything for all of us.
He reached out and took my hand again. His eyes were soft and worried. "So am I," he said gently, "but we need to be sure before we decide anything. Let's consider all our options first. You know that's the right thing to do."
"Okay," I agreed, afraid if I kept pushing right now, that he'd get suspicious of my motives again. Besides, he'd find out soon enough that there weren't going to be any other options thanks to Carter Bennett and his sick game. God, only knew how my brother would react when he realized that we weren't going to have a choice. We were going to have to make a deal with that asshole. I stared down at our clasped hands with nausea roiling inside me.
"Hey," Andy said reassuringly as he squeezed my hand. I glanced up to see his concerned expression. "We're going to be okay."
I nodded, not trusting myself not to start sobbing if I tried to speak. We were so far from okay, and I was so lost and alone. I knew I needed to work on him some more, but I couldn't bring myself to push him anymore today. I just couldn't stomach it.
"Don't worry." He released my hand and rose from his chair. He smiled down with such certainty in his eyes. "Everything will work out fine. You'll see. We've got this." He winked at me and left my office, closing the door behind him.
I dropped my face into my hands as a maelstrom of guilt, fear, and hopelessness overwhelmed me, and I burst into tears in my office once again. Sadly, it was all I seemed to do lately.
**********
"Jen?" Ford asked. "What's wrong, honey?"
&
nbsp; I glanced up from my plate of ravioli to see him looking at me with a worried expression. I'd been picking at my food for a while now, brooding in silence as my appetite dwindled away with each passing moment.
"Nothing. I'm fine," I answered softly from across the booth we were sitting in. Ford had taken me out to dinner at a tiny out of the way Italian place after he closed Apex Ink for the night. The food was delicious, but my stomach was churning with stress and worry over Carter's blackmail, and my less than successful talk with Andy earlier today.
"Like hell, you're fine." He narrowed his eyes and looked at me sternly. "You've been picking at your food without saying a word since you got it."
"I'm sorry," I murmured pathetically.
"Don't apologize, honey." His brow furrowed with worry. "I'm not angry. Just talk to me."
I stared at my plate again. I longed to confess everything to him and damned the consequences, but I couldn't risk Ford being sucked into this mess.
"I'm...I'm just worried about work," I told him vaguely, praying that he wouldn't insist that I elaborate.
"Is it that bad, honey?" he asked gently. "I overheard your brother and father in their office on Thursday talking about possible layoffs. Has your father not found any potential business partners besides the first one? Andy sounded pretty upset about that one. Was it a bad deal?"
"Can we please not fucking talk about it?" I snapped at him with exasperation coloring my words. I was desperate to put a stop this conversation before I was forced to lie to him.
Ford pursed his lips as hurt and anger flashed in his eyes. "Fine," he grumbled irritably, and then quieted. He turned his attention back to his own food, and I could see the muscles in his jaw flex as annoyance simmered in his eyes.
Great, now I was a bitch. Add that to my pile of guilt. I wasn't sure how much more of this I could take. I buried my face in my hands and fought to keep from crying.
After a moment, I felt the light touch of Ford's fingers on my hands. "Jenny," he said tenderly. "Don't cry."
An Act of Release: Order & Chaos Book 2 Page 17