Trust Me

by Lacey Black

  As I make my way to the end of the park, near the edge of town, I decide to head out of the park and hit some side roads. I don’t know anyone who lives in this area of town so I know I don’t have to worry about being stopped and having to make small talk. I’m definitely not in the mood to chit chat with anyone.

  When I reach the end of the street, I stop in front of a big house that always seems to catch my eye. I find myself driving by it on patrol or running by it more and more frequently. I have no idea what I find so appealing about this house. It’s not too big, but it’s definitely made for a family. A family that I never intend to have. The backyard is big and fenced in and I can almost see my friends gathering in the backyard with food and beer. It has a big front porch, too, which I love, but my favorite part is the big garage. I’ve been told there is an attached shop area on the back of it. I wouldn’t need a whole shop for working on stuff, but I could definitely use a space for tinkering. Plus, the thought of a man cave with big television, comfy chairs, fridge, and maybe a pool table is appealing as hell.

  I start to jog again, heading back towards home. I take a moment to actually entertain the thought of living in a house like that one, maybe a wife and kids waiting there for me when I get home from work. Someone like Avery who is funny and sweet and sexy as hell. A kid like Brooklyn and maybe a brother or two.

  The thought of a future with Avery doesn’t completely turn my stomach which actually might scare me most of all.

  After tucking Brooklyn into bed and reading three different princess stories, I grab my phone and head to the front porch. I hit the best friend lottery when I met Holly Jenkins in seventh grade. We met during volleyball after we both discovered we weren’t exactly the athletic type, and we’ve been joined at the hip ever since. Besides my mom, she’s the only other person I confide in and truly trust. When everything with Drake came to a head, she wiped my tears, answered her phone at all hours of the night, held my hand in the bathroom when I peed on that stick and waited for the plus sign, and held my hair back when I threw up everything I ate that first trimester. She’s Brooklyn’s Godmother, and I know she loves my little girl like she’s her own. She’s proof that blood isn’t the only thing that makes a couple of girls sisters.

  I press speed dial number one and wait for her to answer. She’s five feet four of dynamite with shoulder length brown hair and hazel eyes. Where I might be more quiet and reserved, Holly will tell it like it is. Sometimes her honesty can be a hard pill to swallow, but ultimately, she’s always upfront and direct with me and has my best interest at heart. We just click.

  “You’re late,” she said in way of her greeting.

  “I had to read an extra princess story to the little princess tonight,” I reply, sitting down on the front porch swing with a glass of water. I love my porch swing. I would sit here year-round if I could get away with it.

  “Well, I guess I’ll let it slide…this time.” I hear the humor in her voice because we both know that this won’t be anywhere close to the last time I call her late. She starts to tell me all about her shift at the ER that day. She works days with my brother, Will, at Rivers Edge Health Center, the small hospital in town. Will has been a paramedic for three years and rotates between working the ER with Holly and working the rig. Holly loves it, saying that every patient who comes in is different and keeps her on her toes. She’s the best nurse I know. She was born to heal and help. And I’m not embarrassed to admit that I’ve used her as my own personal nurse a time or two.

  Our conversation progresses into Sunday family dinner night. She always asks and I wonder if it’s because she’s genuinely curious or if it has more to do with my brother Will. Holly knows about my ongoing childhood crush on Maddox. She’s the only one who knows, for that matter.

  “Maddox was there this week,” I said after I swallow a big gulp of water.

  “Really? Did you tell him you’re madly in love with him and want to have screaming sex with him?”

  “Of course not! He doesn’t like me. He looks at me like I’m his best friend’s little sister.”

  “You are his best friend’s little sister,” she replies dryly.

  “I know that, but I’m not a little girl anymore. He still sees me as the little girl who followed him and Jake around all the time, staring up at him with big googly eyes and a dorky brace-face smile.”

  She chuckles a little at that one. “You know, if you don’t go for it with him, he’s going to find someone else to wrap those strong arms around and shower with kisses from those mouth-watering, to-die-for lips.”

  “Geez, Holl. Are you sure you’re not the one with the massive crush?” I ask mostly as a joke, but realize that the thought of Holly crushing on Maddox wasn’t that funny at all.

  “Every woman in town notices that man. You should just walk up to him, throw your arms around him, and kiss him. I bet you won’t be disappointed.”

  “Well, I’ll keep that in mind,” I reply, knowing good and well that I won’t be doing that anytime soon.

  “Hey, why don’t we go out next Saturday night? It’s been a while since we went to Jack’s for some drinks and pool. I bet your mom would keep Brookie Bean for you until Sunday dinner.”

  “Okay. That does sound like fun. I’ll ask her tomorrow when I swing by the bakery.”

  I proceed to tell her all about my conversation with my mom about Drake and his newest squeeze, Kelsey. “Geez, Kelsey? She sounds 18. Is she a cheerleader, too?” Holly asks sarcastically.

  “She’s a junior in college apparently. I hope she doesn’t mind sharing her boyfriend,” I throw out there as my mind returns briefly to my own relationship with Drake.

  If there’s one thing Drake can’t do, it is monogamy. I started dating him the summer before my seventeenth birthday. Drake was my first boyfriend; my first everything. Well, almost first everything. He had just turned nineteen when we met, and I was smitten from that first moment. We met at the river where all the kids go for swimming, sunbathing, and to hang out with friends. He was super tan in his board shorts that hung low on his lean hips. He had just finished his freshman year of college, and every girl was looking at him with lust filled eyes. Ultimately, it was me he approached that day, and we hit it off right away. He used his good manners and sexy smile to charm his way into my life and eventually, my pants. On my seventeenth birthday, he gave me a beautiful heart necklace, and in return, I gave him my virginity. I fell hard and fast for Drake Connor.

  It took awhile before I heard the first rumor of Drake being with another girl from a few towns over. It was my senior year in high school and he was a junior in college. When I confronted him on it, he swore he was faithful to me and that the rumor was started by a jealous frat brother. Of course, being the naïve eighteen year old, I believed him. In fact, the way he looked at me made me feel guilty for questioning his faithfulness and loyalty to me.

  By the time I graduated from high school, I started hearing more and more rumors. Girls I didn’t even know were coming up to me on the street and telling me he was cheating on me. One girl in particular called me up and told me she had been with Drake multiple times. Again, I confronted him, and he denied it. So when she called again, I told her off. I didn’t have time for jealous girls and their petty stupidity. That’s when she sent me copies of their text messages back and forth. She even had photos; lots of photos. I was sick; literally sick to my stomach at his betrayal. Turns out it wasn’t only his betrayal making me nauseous because that’s also when I noticed my period was late. After a brief conversation with Holly over the phone that involved a whole lot of crying, she met me at my parent’s house with a drug store bag full of pregnancy tests. First test came back positive right away. So did the next four. I was nineteen, pregnant with a cheater’s baby, alone, and nursing a broken heart from the man who swore he’d always be by my side.

  Even after we broke up, I assumed he’d be a part of his child’s life. When I told him that I was pregnant, his response was
to tell me it wasn’t his. Apparently, in his mind if he’s not faithful, I’m not being faithful either. He threw me out of our apartment we just rented together. Seriously, the ink was barely dry on the lease. He walked away telling me he wasn’t ruining his life by saddling himself up to a baby. Who says that, anyway? I didn’t get myself pregnant, mister. I can count on one hand how many times Drake has seen Brooklyn in the three years since her birth. Even then, he doesn’t acknowledge her as his child. Jerk.

  I wrap up my conversation with Holly with a promise to call her as soon as I confirmed my sitter situation for next Saturday night. After our good-byes, I sit on the swing in the crisp October air, staring into the dark of night, and recall all those nights I cried myself to sleep over Drake. How can one person be so stupid? And not just once, but twice. You’d think that with the Drake drama, I wouldn’t be so stupid as to put my heart out there a second time. But no one ever said I was the brightest star in the sky. The fact was I wanted to believe in the magic of true love. But the one time I finally decide to open my heart again, that person rips it out and stomps on it, too. Is it so hard to find a guy who wants to relationship with you and you alone?

  As I’m sitting on the swing, I see a shadow coming towards me down the sidewalk across the street. As the running figure crosses the street a few doors down and heads towards the sidewalk in front of my house, I realize that I know that shadow. It’s Maddox. As his swift, strong legs carry him along the sidewalk in front of my house, he turns his head and catches my gaze. He stops his jog and pulls the ear buds from his ears. His breathing is labored and his body is sweaty. I can hear the faint music from the ear buds and can tell it’s loud and edgy. Probably AC/DC if I had to guess.

  “Hey, what are you doing out here?” he asks.

  “Just enjoying what’s left of the nice evening weather. Out for a jog?” I ask. Well duh, Miss Obvious. Idiot.

  “Yeah,” he says as he approaches my steps. “Mind if I join you for a minute?”

  My brain almost shuts down, and I can’t think. Maddox wants to sit with me on my front porch? Hell. He actually sits down on my porch swing with me. I can’t help but wonder if it would be inappropriate to climb into his lap. Maybe lick his sweaty neck and rub my hands through his sweaty, messy hair? So I just shake my head, nodding my approval to join me.

  “Can I get you a drink of water?” I finally get out.

  “No, I’m good. So what are you thinking about out here all by yourself?”

  There’s no way I can tell him what I was honestly thinking about so I decide to go the safe route and mention my conversation with Holly about Saturday night. “It’ll be good for you to go out for a night. Of course, Jake and I will be there after we get off work to keep an eye on you,” he says.

  Great. Maddox is in big brother mode. “Well, I’m a big girl. I don’t really need you to watch out for me,” I reply, my tone kind of short.

  I look over at him, and he’s staring at my chest. Not like a little glance, but full-fledged staring at my girls like he’s picturing what they look like under my shirt without my bra. My nipples pucker under his intense watchful eyes. He glances up and makes eye contact with me which causes me to blush. Not just a slight pink, but a full-fledged red faced ‘Oh my God it’s two hundred degrees out here’ kind of blush. He gives me that crooked half smile of his, not even embarrassed that I just busted him ogling my girls.

  “Yeah, you’re not a little girl anymore,” he says after a few moments of silence. Well, I have no reply to that. Is he actually flirting with me? “Well, I better head back home and shower.”

  And just like that - with those eight little words, I’m now picturing him in the shower. Crap. I stare at his sweaty shirt that is clinging to his upper body and picture it being peeled off his chiseled chest and thrown on the floor. The shower. I could definitely enjoy a shower with Maddox. He gives me another of his slow, sexy grins as if he can read the dirty thoughts going through my mind. Great. It would be my luck he really can read minds.

  “See you Saturday night,” he says as he puts his ear buds back in his ears and heads back down my front porch steps. He turns and looks at me over his shoulder one last time before he takes off, jogging into the night back towards his house.

  Hell, now I need a shower. A very cold shower. Why can’t I be attracted to a guy who is actually looking for a girlfriend, not just a quick fling? I sit for a few more moments lost in thought before heading back inside with the images of a very naked and very wet Maddox running through my mind.

  It’s been the longest damn week ever. Jake and I were in and out of the squad car all week long. High school and college kids enjoying the last of the fall weather before it gets cold, underage drinkers, a few DUI’s, a couple of domestics, and a bunch of speeders. I’m definitely ready to let loose for a little bit Saturday night after work, but Jake doesn’t know the real reason why. It’s Saturday night and I get to see Avery, hang out with her and maybe share a few laughs with her.

  I walk into Jack’s Pub and am assaulted by the classic rock coming from the jukebox. I immediately spot Jake and a few other friends in the back by the pool tables so I swing by the bar and grab a beer before heading towards the back. I see Jake has wasted no time and already has a few ladies surrounding him. He gives me a nod and re-introduces me to Emma and Heather. He’s got that shit eating grin on his face and I know he’s already secured us a couple of ladies to enjoy for the night. I can’t tell him that I’m not interested in casual sex with one of the double D twins. There’s no way in hell I can tell him I’d rather go home with his little sister tonight.

  “Hi there,” Heather coos at me in a flirty, sing-song voice.

  “Evenin’ ladies,” I reply and give them each a little nod. Heather curls up to my side, batting her over-done eyelashes at me. I’m just not feeling it tonight. I’ve enjoyed Heather’s company a few times in the past and we’ve always had a great time. She’s rubbing her free hand up and down my forearm and gives me a flirty wink. She’s smiling at me as if she already knows where our night is leading. Sorry, sweetheart, not tonight.

  I notice platinum blond hair standing up at the bar, chatting with the bartender, Gabe. Gabe is a total player and it pisses me off that he’s watching her with a hungry look on his smug face like she’s his next meal. Avery laughs at something he says, and I want to walk up there, throw her over my shoulder, and take her straight out the front door caveman style so I’m the only person who can hear that laugh.

  I watch her for a few moments, taking in her outfit from behind that accentuates her beautiful ass. To top off her outfit, she’s wearing sexy black boots that make her legs look endless. I want them to wrap around my waist - or better yet, my neck.

  Avery turns from the bar at that moment and hands her friend, Holly, a drink. They both head our way, and I notice Gabe checking out her ass as she heads towards us. Apparently, I growl. Out loud.

  “Is that guy checking out my sister,” Jake breaks my train of thought, already standing up straighter, glaring at Gabe, and looking for a fight.

  “No, don’t worry about it, man. She’s not into Gabe anyway,” I reply, hoping there’s truth to my statement.

  As Avery and Holly approach our group, she makes eye contact with me and smiles. Her eyes take an appreciative glance down my body, and I can feel her gaze burning my chest through my shirt. But, then her smile quickly fades and she looks away. That’s when I realize Heather is still plastered to my side. I shake Heather off of me and lean in to give Avery a kiss on the cheek. I inhale as I do, and damn does she smell like heaven. It’s sweet like sugar and vanilla, and I instantly want to know what the rest of her smells like. Fuck. My pants are getting tight at the mental image of smelling her. All of her.

  “Dude, get the fuck away from my sister,” Jake growls and trains his intense blue eyes on me.

  “I’m just saying hello,” I reply, not looking at him for fear that he’ll see straight through my lie. I quickly sa
y hello to Holly and give her a peck on the cheek too so it looks like it’s just a regular part of my welcome.

  I can’t tell you what either one of the Double D twins are wearing right now, though no doubt it’s skimpy, low cut, and has tons of cleavage pouring out the top. But, Avery is wearing her favorite skinny jeans, the ones with the little holes in all the right spots, and a tight blue v-neck t-shirt, which makes her eyes sparkle even more if that’s even possible.

  “Let’s play a game,” Holly says to Avery as she heads around the table to slip some change into the pool table and rack up the balls.

  “Partners?” Avery asks as she glances between me and Jake, and then back to the Double D twins.

  “Sure,” I reply before Jake can decline and run off to start his night with Emma.

  “Well, I know how much Jake sucks at pool so I’ll take you as my partner,” she replies and points her long, narrow finger at me.

  “I do not suck,” Jake says. “I just hate listening to you cry because you lost so I let you win! Besides, I’m very good with a stick.” He laughs suggestively and hands his beer to Emma who is laughing and chatting with Heather. Both girls are looking at me and Jake, giving us their best flirty look. I’m pretty sure both of them are willing to leave right now and head someplace more private.

  I turn my attention back to Avery who is chatting with James, another good friend we’ve known since high school. They are talking about Brooklyn, and I can hear the happiness in her voice. James’s sister is married with a couple of kids so he’s sharing his latest silly antic story about his niece and nephew.

  I take a long pull from my beer bottle and walk up behind her. I lean in and catch a whiff of her coconut shampoo. I whisper in her ear so only she can hear, “You better be ready to play dirty. I don’t like to lose to Jake. Ever.”