For I Have Sinned: Bastian and Rob 1 (Southern Sin)

by Julia McBryant

  “You’re gonna make sure I behave and take care of me now, aren’t you?” Bastian’s words came in that same dreamy, faraway voice.

  “If you let me.” Rob wanted it so much, and Bastian wanted it so much, and why the fuck not? They had to keep from getting caught for what, three months? So simple. “Do you want me to make sure you behave and take care of you?”

  “Yes, Father.”

  “When it’s the two of us and no one will overhear — and I mean no one, never in school — if you want to, you can call me ‘Daddy.’” Rob swallowed hard, his stomach dropping at the enormity of it.

  Bastian gave those same slow blinks. “I get to call you ‘Daddy’ now?”

  “I want you to, Bastian.”

  “Then will you give me a kiss, Daddy? No one ever kisses me.”

  Rob had made vows and he’d stayed faithful to them for five long years, no matter how much he struggled. He’d stayed faithful to their spirit in seminary, trying to fit himself into them, to mortify the flesh, to put off earthly things. It had been years, too many years, and he could probably parse out how long and when and with whom, but he didn’t want to. Instead, he kept Bastian’s wrists pinned behind his back with one hand and tipped his chin up with the other.

  Bastian’s lips were slightly chapped from the cold when Rob sucked them gently; he tasted like sugary candy. Bastian kissed back, stretching toward Rob, nipping his lip. Rob bit his more firmly, then sucked the bitten place, and Bastian sighed, a good sigh, it seemed. He rocked his hips against Rob. Bastian had stiffened unbelievably, oh God, he was just as big as Rob had thought, as Rob had hoped; he loved a big cock on a twink. Rob had long ago risen to meet him, and the cotton of Bastian’s briefs slipped deliciously against Rob’s horrible black polyester pants.

  Rob nuzzled up and whispered in Bastian’s ear. “Will you still feel as good if I let your wrists go?”

  “Please keep holding them Daddy, it feels so safe.”

  Rob still didn’t understand this. But he was lucky enough to have it. He just had to accept it now, take it as a gift, hold it and say yes.

  He’d already said yes. He already held it in his hands. It baffled him, terrified him, and elated him in equal measures.

  “I need to see you play with your cock. If I’m going to be your daddy, I need to know what you like.” Rob slipped into it like a warm bath, like something he’d been waiting for. “I’m going to sit against the back of the bed. I want you to take yourself out — no, don’t take them off, take yourself out, it’s so much better that way — and lie back against me. I’ll hold you tight. It’ll give me a chance to take some of these clothes off, too. Can you wait a second for me, kelpie?”

  Bastian smiled a little. “No one ever called me something like that.”

  Rob let him go carefully. “Irish water spirit. You’re so beautiful you ensnare the unwary and drag them down to their doom.” He smiled. “Why do I feel as if I’m being dragged?”

  “Because that white collar is choking you again, Daddy-O, and you’d better take it off.”

  He swatted at Bastian, who darted away. “You’ll come back when I offer to pin you again.” Rob began unbuttoning his shirt.

  “Oh, fuck me, I will. Didn’t take you long to figure that out, did it, Daddy?” Bastian stretched out on the bed. “So what kind of underwear does Daddy wear? Is this the part where we get to find out?”

  “Daddy wears boxers.”

  “I used to look at you when you’d swim with us.” Bastian still watched him.

  “Did you? And what were you looking at, in particular?”

  Bastian colored. “You’re cut — I mean, cut like you lift or something, I couldn’t tell about the other thing. I don’t have any hair but all the guys who do, they wax it off. You don’t wax and it’s all blond. I’d wonder what your chest would feel like on mine, because you have chest hair and I don’t.”

  “I thought you fucked around with men before.”

  “That doesn’t mean they ever took their clothes off.”

  Rob turned and stared. “Were you just blowing your teacher?! You made it sound like there was some kind of relationship there.”

  Bastian shrugged. “It was murky. He was hot and he wanted me and he had a kink and I liked it too, and that doesn’t mean it was a real relationship.”

  “So he was assaulting you.”

  “It’s a gray area.”

  “He was at the very least taking advantage of you.”

  “Probably, yes.”

  Rob turned his back. “This is a mistake.”

  “No! No, it’s not like that!” Bastian’s voice changed suddenly, got higher, more desperate. “You’re different! You’re not taking advantage of me! I’m asking for this! I am eighteen and I am asking for it. We’re in a room. You just called me a nickname.” He was quiet for a few seconds. “You said you wanted to take care of me and make sure I behave. He just got off when I called him ‘daddy.’ And I want this. I asked you for it. You didn’t ask me. You never asked, not once. I pushed and pushed and pushed you.”

  Rob faced Bastian slowly. He wanted him. He shouldn’t have him. He should take what he wanted. He should kneel down and beg for forgiveness. He was caring for a boy who wanted him. He was corrupting someone who depended on him.

  “Why me?” Rob shook his head. “Why, out of anyone, why me, Bastian?”

  Bastian blinked at him. “Because you’re you.” As if it were that simple, that easy, as if it answered every question. “Daddy, please?”

  That little voice. It broke all self-control.

  Rob sat at the top of the bed, legs apart, and held his arms out. Bastian crawled into them and lay against his chest. Rob had expected Bastian to settle facing away from him, but instead Bastian curled in a ball and rested on him, head on his shoulder, face buried in his neck. Rob pulled his knees up, pinning Bastian between them. He sighed and cuddled closer as Rob wrapped his arms tightly around him. “Little kelpie.” Rob said it quietly, trying it, seeing how it sounded. Bastian rested soft and smooth against him, but jutted hard knees and elbows.

  “You smell good,” Bastian murmured.

  No one had said anything like that to him in so long. “What do I smell like?”

  “Coffee and something else.”

  Bastian smelled like mint shampoo with a hint of chlorine. Yes, Rob wanted this. His imagination had groped toward this when he’d stood in front of Bastian, tongue-tied, in the pool office. He held Bastian for a long time, neither of them speaking. Finally, Rob whispered into his ear. “Turn and let me see you. I’ll keep holding you tight, the way you like it.”

  “Okay, Daddy.” Bastian shifted sideways, enough for Rob to see his cock, but stayed curled up. “Wait.” He untangled from Rob’s arms, scampered across the room, rooted through his bag, and returned with lube. He settled back in.

  “You brought lube?”

  “You never know. God. I might’ve been using it with that Littleton kid or something.”

  “Aren’t we just a prepared little boy scout,”

  “Are you mad?” Bastian sounded anxious: his voice higher, faster. “I’m sorry if I made you mad. Should I not have —”

  “You’re fine.” Rob kissed his head. “Show me now how you do it.”

  “Now I’m not hard. I thought you were mad.”

  Rob held Bastian tightly in one arm, bit his lip, reminded himself that Bastian wanted it as much as he did, and reached between Bastian’s legs to stroke his cock very gently, really just resting a hand on it and petting with his thumb. Bastian sighed again, clearly contented, and his eyes fluttered closed. “That feels good, Daddy.” He immediately began stiffening. “Do it more. Do that to my balls, Daddy.”

  Rob cupped him. Oh God, they were big. He held them in his hand and stroked gently. Bastian fairly purred. “Oh please Daddy, please do that to my ass.” Bastian was curled up, resting on his tailbone with his knees drawn up; Rob slipped a finger lower and oh God, there it was: that
perfect little hole, drawn up tight, that little pucker Rob had pictured so many times while he jacked off. Rob circled it through his briefs and teased the tiny opening. Bastian made a contented sound in his throat and spread his legs some more.

  “Tell me the truth.” Rob dropped his voice again. “Have you ever had sex?”

  “Yeah. But I’m clean. I get tested, Daddy.”

  “You know what kind of sex I mean. I don’t mean fucking girls.”

  “Uh-huh. I’ve done that.”

  “How much?”

  “Some.”

  “How big were they?”

  “Average. They were my age so they were probably stupider at it than you would be.” He opened his eyes and looked at Rob. “You wouldn’t hurt me.”

  “I’m bigger than average. I’m bigger than you.”

  “But you’d be careful with me. And this feels so good, Daddy.” Oh God, that tight little hole was opening for him. Rob wanted to so much tease it, to slick it and fuck his finger into it. He loved to finger a twink who wanted it bad. Rob’s breath caught. He wanted to watch Bastian and see what he liked but oh, the allure of that puckered entrance. It had been so long, so incredibly long, since he’d fingered a perfect opening like Bastian’s and even touching it through his briefs had Rob stiff and grinding helplessly against him. No, no, no. He couldn’t.

  “You can’t have that yet.”

  “Why, Daddy?”

  “Because I need time. I just — I need time.” Rob would devour Bastian. Rob would flip him over and fuck him, wait, then fuck him again while his thighs were still sticky, holding him close and pinned so Bastian felt dreamy and safe. But Rob wouldn’t do it. He was too lucky to have this, too lucky to be trusted. “Come on, little kelpie.” He made his voice silky-sweet. “Take yourself out for me and show me how you like it, and I won’t stop touching you, promise. Let me see how much you come. I love a lot of come.” God did Rob like come. He’d take Bastian’s briefs off and use it as lube to fuck his finger just a bit into his ass, to get him ready to go again, this time in his hand. Rob had gone without this many years and he could make himself patient for Bastian. Bastian deserved it.

  Curled in his lap, head on his shoulder and eyelashes fluttering against his neck, Bastian finally, finally took his cock out. Rob’s suspicion had been right: he was uncut, with a thick shaft, and a pink, defined head. He dribbled lube on himself. “It’s easy.” Bastian dreamily took himself in his hand, slicked his cock, and began jerking it, pulling his foreskin up and nearly over his head every time. It stretched farther the more he played with it, and his dripping precum made Rob want to jerk himself.

  “Does that feel good, little kelpie? Tell me how good it feels.”

  “My cock feels so good. I never take long. I go so fast. I’m gonna go really really fast with you petting my ass.” His breath was already catching, his head swelling a little and his balls drawing up. Rob rested his finger right on that little hole and rubbed. Bastian gasped. He jacked himself hard, bucked, and spilled over the edge of his briefs and his stomach, so much come, oh God, so much. Bastian breathed like he’d just run a race, swiped his hand on the sheets, and curled close into Rob again.

  “That helped, baby, didn’t it? Didn’t that help you feel better?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “But boys like you need it more than once, don’t they?”

  “Yeah. I like to do it twice.”

  “Take your briefs off for me, they’re sticky.” Rob still stroked his ass. “But don’t wipe your stomach off. Then come back just the way you were.”

  Bastian pulled his underwear off. His cock had gone mostly soft, his foreskin drawing forward to cover nearly all of his head. Rob desperately wanted to spread come over it. Instead, he took a bit of it and stroked it over Bastian’s ass, then a little more of it, then some more, until Bastian had become slick with it. He whimpered a little as Rob spread it over him, stroked him with it and very gently opened him up. Bastian snuggled into him and spread his legs. Rob thoroughly slicked his first finger and slid it just inside his tight ring; Bastian gasped a little.

  “Was that good or bad?” Rob stilled his finger.

  “Good. Really, really good, Daddy.”

  Rob got even harder. He hadn’t known how he’d react to Bastian calling him ‘daddy’ but it turned him on so much. “Do you want more, little kelpie? Tell me.”

  “More, please more.”

  Rob scooped all the come he could manage onto his finger and slid it into Bastian. He moved it inside him gently until he found the good spot that would make him arch and buck; had anyone done this for him yet? Rob pressed that spot, then moved his finger across it lightly. Bastian gasped. But when he stroked it a bit harder, Bastian buried his head into Rob’s neck and almost shouted.

  “Shhh, shhh, you can’t be too loud. Has anyone ever done this?”

  “Not like that, Daddy. Oh God. Oh God.” Bastian clung to Rob. Oh, Rob wanted this: holding Bastian tightly as he pleasured him. He didn’t know he wanted it until he had it. Bastian started to rise again. Very, very gently, Rob used his thumb to spread the very last of his come onto his head. Bastian shivered with pleasure. Then he dribbled plenty of lube on Bastian’s cock and began to jerk him gently. Occasionally, he softly thumbed over his swollen, slick head, and every time, Bastian gasped. As he kept it up, Bastian finally sucked in a sharp breath. “Don’t, it’s too much, just play with it.”

  “I can show you how to come without anything touching your cock. You want to learn that?”

  “Uh-huh.”

  Rob stroked him a little harder, then lubed another finger and carefully slid it up to meet the other. He held Bastian tightly, like before. Carefully, because even if Bastian had sex before, it had been a very long time, Rob began fucking his fingers in and out of him, always sure to return to that good spot. He talked while he did it. “That’s it, honey. You like when I finger your ass? Because I love to pet you like this, baby. You feel how hard my cock is? What a sweet, tight little ass you have. I can’t wait to teach you how good my cock feels inside it. I can make you feel so good with my cock, honey. But I have to be so careful with you. If you’re a good boy, you can have this whenever you want. Good boys get this all the time and you were such a good boy today. You’re such a good boy, honey. What a good, sweet boy with a gorgeous cock and a perfect ass. Are you gonna come hard for me? I bet you are. I want to see all that sweet, sticky come again. You need to get it all out.” Bastian’s breath had quickened, his arms tightened around Rob’s neck.

  “I know you want to grab your cock but don’t do it. Let me finish you off. You said it’s my job to take care of you. Come all over for me. C’mon. That’s it.” Bastian strained towards it. “C’mon. You can do it. Come for me.” He pressed on Bastian, fucked him once, and pressed again. Bastian curled up with a small cry and came hard, spurting all over his belly, up to his chest, pumping in rhythm with Rob pressing inside him. Rob made it last for him, then brought him down gently. Bastian finally went limp in his arms. Rob slid his fingers out carefully. Bastian would be sensitive now.

  “I’ll be right back. I’m going to get you a washcloth to clean up baby, okay?” He laid Bastian down on the bed.

  Bastian blinked slowly. “Oh fuck me, I’ve never come that hard in my goddamn life. What the fuck did you do to me?” He stretched. “Ï need to go clean up.”

  “I rubbed your prostate until you came, honey.” Rob laughed. “I know someone’s probably touched it before, but no one’s spent time doing it, have they?”

  “Not like that.”

  “You’re a baby in bed.” He grinned.

  “I am not!”

  “Lay down, kelpie, and let me clean you off. You’re sticky.” He wiped off Bastian’s tummy, then Bastian got up and went to the bathroom. Rob heard water running, and he came out a bit later.

  “What about you?” Rob heard suspicion in his voice.

  “I’ll get myself off later. You don’t need
to do that tonight. You swam too hard. You need to sleep.”

  “Are you gonna sleep in here?” Bastian reddened. “I don’t like to sleep alone in strange places.”

  “Do you want me to?” Rob hadn’t dared to hope.

  “Yes.”

  “Which bed do you want?”

  Bastian rolled his eyes. “The same one I’m in, duh.” He paused. “You’d get off if I laid on my stomach and you rubbed against me, wouldn’t you? I’d like that. You’d feel good on top of me.”

  Rob’s cock stiffened again. “I definitely would. Very, very quickly.”

  Bastian flipped on his stomach, naked, legs spread slightly so Rob could see his ass, just slightly open, his balls between his legs. “Please, Daddy? I wanna feel you on me.”

  Rob shed his boxers, slicked his cock, and covered Bastian’s body with his own. He rested between Bastian’s muscled cheeks. “Is this what you wanted?”

  “Uh-huh. Oh, Daddy, you are big.”

  Rob began thrusting on him. Bastian purred and wiggled and moaned a little. Those moans went straight to Rob’s cock. His balls dragged against Bastian’s ass and thighs. That little cleft slicked with lube; Rob’s cock slid deliciously. Bastian arched up at him and that tiny movement did him in. Rob sprayed all over himself, all over Bastian’s back, the pent-up frustration of holding him and touching him and watching him finally letting go against that soft skin.

  Rob lowered his head and rested it on Bastian’s shoulder.

  “You felt good.” That faraway voice again. “I like you holding my arms down.”

  Rob had pinned him without realizing it.

  “Will you fuck me like this? Sometime? Will you? I think I’d like it a whole lot.”

  “If you want me to.”

  “Can we go to sleep now? I’m really tired.”

  He cleaned Bastian’s back off. Bastian flopped back down and looked at Rob. “Are you getting in bed?” He spoke like Rob was a fairly stupid child.

  Rob pulled his boxers back on, set a cell phone alarm for 6:30 am, turned the lights off, and pulled the blankets up. Bastian didn’t bother with clothes.

  “Daddy-O, when you sleep in bed with someone, you’re not supposed to sleep on the opposite fucking side.”