Stop!
Page 17
The window is closing already. He’s moving on. The vultures have started to circle. Walk away, Hollis. He obviously was never that into you. And who could blame him with your messed-up face. You were stupid to think you could get him back.
I got out of line and headed toward the door. The scar whispers got louder with each step. Suddenly, my body jerked. It was as if some invisible force grabbed me by the shoulders and kept me from leaving. Seeing Risher and Leah was like a shot of Red Bull to my insecurities and as usual I was drowning in them. I forced myself into logic mode. I needed to listen to the one thing that never let me down. Numbers.
Numbers were black and white. Right and wrong. Definite. The answer would always be the same until a new dependent variable was introduced. Change the variable, the equation shifts, and the outcome is transformed.
I borrowed a pen from the coffee girl and grabbed a napkin off the counter. I jotted down the only thing I was certain of in life. I then marched over to the lounge, prepared to go all algebraic on someone’s ass.
Parking myself directly in front of Risher, I held his gaze, and said, “Leah, get out of here.”
Her back stiffened. “What did you just say to me?”
“I’m sorry, was I not specific enough for you? How’s this? Get your scrawny, bubblegum painted fingers out of his hair, your overinflated tits off of his arm, and your bitchy, stuck-up ass off of that sofa.”
“Risher, aren’t you going to stop her from talking to me that way?”
Stunned, he answered, “Too late, she’s already done it. And I think you better listen.”
Leah pouted as she scooted off of the sofa.
“I have a class in twenty minutes,” Risher said.
“I won’t take long.”
As I stared into his hurt eyes, my nerves shook. I drew in a deep breath, summoning up a final push of courage.
“I’m sorry if I made you feel only skin deep. I know how it is to be on the receiving end of that and I will always regret doing that to you. Because there is an incredible soul underneath all your hotness. I had a hard time believing that someone like you could want someone like me. And that’s all on me. Ever since you walked out this morning, I’ve been trying to think of an adequate way to apologize. You know, the one-shot grand gesture to show you how much you mean to me. But you’re not a one-shot guy. You’re an every minute, of every day, for the rest of my life kind of guy. And if you give me a chance, I promise to use all of that time to prove how much I believe in you and in us.”
“Hollis…”
“You don’t have to answer me right now. I’ll be here when you’re ready.”
I handed him the folded-up napkin, gave him a slight smile, and walked away. When I was almost out the door, curiosity got the best of me. I glanced over my shoulder and saw Risher rubbing the back of his neck as he studied the napkin note.
I have two absolutes in life. One is numbers. Solve this equation to see the other.
~Hollis ☺
9x - 7i > 3(3x – 7u)
___________________
9x - 7i > 9x - 21u
-9x -9x
___________________
-7i > -21u
___ ___
-7 -7
____________
After a minute, he carefully folded it up and slid it into his shirt pocket. I felt a little lighter as I headed out the door. At least he wasn’t throwing it or me away just yet.
EACH TIME MY phone chirped, beeped, or rang my hopes soared. And each time Risher’s name didn’t appear on the screen they took a nosedive. It had been a week since I had given him the note. We passed in the hallway, in the cafeteria, and in class, of course, but we didn’t speak. I wasn’t a very patient person, so every minute I didn’t hear from him felt like a lifetime. But I owed him time. He had unconditionally given me his heart. To find out I had doubted his intention took time to get over and hopefully get past. I couldn’t take back the words that hurt him, but I would stay true to my promise. I’d wait for Risher for as long as he needed me to.
Pushing my boy troubles aside as much as possible, I focused on the weekend. It was Parent’s Weekend and I was excited that Mom and Dad would be here soon. It was the first time we’d seen one another since our tearjerker goodbye nearly two months ago.
I performed the final inspection of my side of the room, making sure I’d scraped off the dust from all visible surfaces and cleared the candy wrappers out from underneath my bed. Benton’s side looked immaculate as usual.
The loud pop of wood-on-wood coming from the direction of Benton’s dresser caused me to spin around. It took a second to adjust to the person standing across the room from me.
“Don’t take this the wrong way, but it’s so weird seeing you like that.”
“Imagine how it feels.” His words were clipped.
With closed eyes and a pinched expression, he tugged on the collar of the pale pink cardigan as if it were cutting off his air supply. Once Benton had revealed himself to me, the difference in his personality versus Abigail’s was like day and night. It wasn’t as simple as, jeans and hoodies were more comfortable than cardigans and skirts. Or that the spikey haircut was easier to manage than long hair. When he looked in the mirror he saw the real him. The reflection staring back at him finally matched the soul within him.
At first, Benton didn’t worry about Parent’s Weekend because he was positive neither of his would take time out of their schedule to attend. He was just starting to come out of the weird mood he’d been in when Mrs. Daniels called, informing him that she’d be coming. Since then, he’d been on edge and irritable.
I didn’t want to mess up my bed, so I grabbed the edge of the desk, I slid up onto it. “What time is your mom supposed to be here?”
He played with the blond wig until it was in the most bearable position on his head. “Any minute. Remember to call me Abigail and use female pronouns.”
“I’ll remember. Y’all wanna come to lunch with me and my parents?”
He looked at me as if I’d grown another head. “Hollis, what are you doing?”
“Inviting you and your mom to lunch.”
“My plan is to spend as little time as possible with her.”
“Um… you gotta eat. Besides, Parent’s Weekend kind of implies spending time with your parents. Some of the activities sound fun.”
“Do I look remotely interested in participating in a mother-daughter sack race?”
I shook my head in response.
“Why don’t you invite Golden Boy and his golden parents? Isn’t it about time y’all get together and start planning the wedding?” He teased, attempting to lift his mood.
“Yeah, that’s up in the air at the moment.”
“What do you mean?” The teasing disappeared, replaced with genuine concern.
“We’re in a bit of a holding pattern right now.”
“I’m sorry, Hollis. I’ve been in my head a lot this week. I told you I sucked at this friendship thing.”
“I know.”
“You need me to kick his golden ass?”
Chuckling, I said, “It’s hard to be tough wearing a pink cardigan and a flowery skirt.”
There was a knock at the door. Benton—I mean Abigail—drew in a deep breath and opened it.
I flew off the desk the second I saw my mom standing in the doorway. We immediately threw our arms around each other.
“Oh, it’s so good to see you!” I yelled.
“I missed you.” Mom held me back taking a good long look. “You’re so grown up.”
“Thanks.”
A deep throat cleared behind us. My gaze shifted to Dad standing with open arms, waiting.
“Daddy!” I leaped into his hug.
“Hello, Sweets.”
I guess it was the combination of the emotional week and realizing just how much I’ve missed my parents that caused a few tears to roll down my cheeks.
I pulled away and wiped underneath my eyes.
“Yeah. I’ve just missed y’all a lot.”
“Hello, I’m Sarah Murphy, Hollis’s mom, but you’ve probably figured that out already.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. Mom and Dad, this is Abigail.”
“Nice to meet you Abigail,” Dad said, extending his hand.
She hesitated before taking it. “Nice to meet you too, Sir, and Mrs. Murphy.”
Mom walked farther into the room. “We were disappointed we didn’t get to meet when Hollis first moved in.”
“Yes, Ma’am.” Abigail’s gaze drifted to the floor.
It amazed me how different her demeanor was from Benton’s. She was uncomfortable, awkward, and shy. While my parents looked around, Abigail backed herself into the corner of the room, as if she was trying to fade into the wall.
“Hollis, some of Abigail’s neatness must have rubbed off on you. Your area looks as good as the day we moved you in.” Mom winked toward Abigail.
I playfully narrowed my eyes. “Ha-ha.”
“Your mother was looking forward to deep cleaning your half of the room. All of her supplies are in the car.” Dad joked.
“Just don’t look under the bed,” Abigail said.
My parents laughed. A snarky comment from Benton was par for the course. But coming from Abigail it was a shock. It made me happy that she felt comfortable enough around my parents to attempt a little humor.
“Hollis, we brought you a few things,” Mom said.
Bouncing on my toes, I clapped. “Oh boy, presents!”
“They’re out in the hall, Tom.” Mom instructed.
“Oh, let me go get them. Y’all stay right here.” He teased.
Dad hauled in a big box with a couple of garment bags draped over the top. “Susan, where do you want this?”
“On the desk.”
Dad did as Mom said and promptly got out of the way. Mom and I unpacked the box of goodies loaded with a fresh supply of groceries.
Unzipping one of the garment bags, Mom revealed the maxi dress she’d texted me about.
“It’s even cuter in person. Thanks, Mom.” I gave her a quick hug.
“You’re welcome, Sweets. I’ll hang it up.”
I grabbed my keys and unlocked my closet. Tossing the keys back onto the dresser, I caught Abigail, still standing in the corner. The sadness in her eyes as she watched the interaction between me and my mom was heartbreaking. It was the first time I’d ever seen anyone consumed by loneliness. When our gaze locked, an appreciative smile ghosted over her lips. She knew I understood what she was feeling.
“Abigail, will your parents be coming this weekend?” Dad asked.
“Yes, Sir. My mother will be coming. My father has to work.” There was a slight tremble in her voice.
Dad glanced out of the window. “What does your dad do?”
“He’s a minister.”
“Ah, the weekend is his busy time then.”
“Yes, Sir.”
While Mom kept busy putting away my stuff, Dad strolled around the room.
“Who’s the Braves fan?” He picked up Benton’s baseball cap that hadn’t been put away.
Benton and I had double-checked last night to make sure all of his stuff was safely locked away in his closet. I couldn’t believe we missed the cap on his nightstand.
My gaze darted from Dad to Abigail.
I walked up to him, snatching the cap playfully out of his hand. “I am, of course.”
“When did you become such a sports fan?”
“When I saw how cute the spor-tee guys were.” I smiled, plopping the cap on.
“Sports are overrated. Your focus needs to be on grades.”
“Oh, Tom. Let her have some fun.”
Rapid knocking filled the room followed by, “Hello?”
Mrs. Daniels stood in the doorway.
“Hey, Mom.” Abigail and her mom timidly hugged each other, neither making full contact.
“Hey, Mrs. Daniels.”
“Oh, hello… Hollis?”
I realized the lady had met me only briefly the one time, but I was her only child’s roommate. My parents hadn’t even met Abigail and they remembered her name. I couldn’t help but notice Abigail’s eye roll.
“Yes, Ma’am. These are my parents, Tom and Susan Murphy.”
All parental units present nodded their greeting.
Mrs. Daniels’s gaze roamed up and down Abigail, as if she were doing a routine inspection.
“Abigail, you look… good.” She sounded skeptical.
Awkward silence.
“How about some lunch?” Mom announced.
Taking Mom’s cue, Dad chimed in. “That sounds like a plan.”
Mom walked up next to me. “Mrs. Daniels, would you and Abigail like to join us?”
A weird glance passed between Abigail and her mom. “That’s very kind of you, but I think we’ll have to skip this time. I don’t get to see my daughter very often and would like to spend some time alone with her.”
Mom smiled. “Of course, we completely understand.”
My parents and I filed out of the room. As I passed Abigail, I noticed the complete disconnect in her eyes. Like she had mentally gone somewhere in order to make it through the time with her mom.
Once in the parking lot, Dad said, “Hollis, give me the keys to your car. After lunch I’ll take it for an oil change and fill up the tank.”
I patted the pockets of my jeans. “I left my keys back in the room. I’ll run up and get them real quick.”
As I approached the room, I noticed the door was still cracked open.
The voice of Mrs. Daniels shot out, her words clipped and stern. “Would you like to explain to me why you’re wearing that wig?”
“Because my hair is still really short.” If I didn’t know the only other person in the room was Abigail, I wouldn’t have recognized the meek and timid voice.
“Why? Enough time has passed. It should have grown out to an appropriate length by now.”
“Well, I’m sorry. I don’t know what to tell you, Mom.”
“Are you honoring the arrangement you made with me and your father?”
“Yes.”
“Trust is a very fragile thing, Abigail. It takes a long time to build, but only a second to destroy. Your father and I have agonized and prayed over the decision to let you attend Chambers. Don’t let us down.”
“I don’t know what you want. I’m sorry, I can’t make my hair grow faster.”
“Open your closet.”
“Are you serious?”
“Abigail Marie Daniels, do not disobey your mother. Now open your closet.”
“I’m really hungry. Can we do this after lunch, please?” Abigail pleaded.
“No. It’ll only take a second.”
“What do you think you’re going to find in there?”
“I pray I find your dresses, skirts, and sweaters we bought you.”
Acting on pure protective mode, I burst through the door, startling both Abigail and her mom. “It’s me again. I’m sorry, my dad wants to take my car and do car stuff to it. I forgot my keys.”
Spotting the set of keys on Abigail’s dresser, I grabbed them.
Looking puzzled, Abigail said, “Hollis…”
“I know, I always toss my keys on your dresser. Sorry. I’m such a nutter butter. Yours are over there on my dresser.”
She glanced at me, indicating she knew what I was up to. Once her mom saw a closet full of girly clothes, she’d be satisfied. So what if it was my closet. Most of my wardrobe was thanks to Abigail anyway.
I hesitated while Abigail opened the closet. Her mom stepped forward, disappearing from view.
A look of gratitude washed over Abigail’s face, as she mouthed, “Thank you.”
I winked.
The sound of hangers sliding over the metal rod echoed from the closet.
“Well, it’s nice to see you’re keeping y
our clothes neat and you’ve bought a few new pieces,” Mrs. Daniels said.
“I better go. My dad’s a bear when he’s hungry.”
Abigail walked over to where I stood behind her dresser. She slyly handed off my keys without her mom noticing. Once the pass was complete, we squeezed each other’s hands.
“Y’all have a good day together,” I said and headed out the door.
After lunch, my car was given the dad treatment while Mom and I took off to the mall. It was the best day I’d had in over a week. Mom and I were in and out of so many shops that I thought about Risher only ninety-eight point five percent of the time. The other one and a half percent filled in that night while lying in bed, not sleeping.
In an attempt to busy my mind, I asked Benton, “How’d the rest of the day go with your mom?”
“Peachy. We hit every feminine cliché in the book. We got a mani-pedi, facial, went shoe shopping, and had lunch at Miss Tillie’s Tea Room.”
“Oh, I’ve driven by that place. It looks really cute from the outside.”
“I swear, if she could have scheduled it, we would have had a mother-daughter OB-GYN exam.”
Laughter burst out of me. “I’m sorry. That’s not funny.”
“It’s kind of funny,” Benton chuckled.
The room fell silent as the mood shifted.
“Thank you again for today. No one has ever done anything like that for me before,” he said.
“No problem. I got yo back, Bro.”
“My parents are suspicious.”
“What makes you think that?”
“My mother was here to check up on me and report her findings back to my father.”
“Well, she didn’t find anything to report back about, except that you’re doing great.”
“I guess.”
“And only two more weeks until your birthday and freedom.”
There was a long pause, then Benton whispered, “I guess.”
There was something weird in his voice.