by Julie Bale
She lifted her hips. I tugged on her panties.
And then every inch of her was mine.
Chapter Eighteen
Georgia
If you could die from anticipation I was there. I was there and I was in it and I was dying.
Ben Lancaster dressed in jeans and a T-shirt was hot.
Ben Lancaster standing at the end of the bed totally naked was a goddamn miracle. The man was beautiful. As if his wide shoulders, tapered waist and chiselled abs weren’t enough, there was his sexy tattoo—I was a sucker for tats—and well, his erection was impressive. Really, really, impressive.
His dark eyes glittered almost as if they were fevered and when he fell to his knees and placed his hands on my legs I wanted to cry because it felt so good to be touched that way. To have someone as amazing as Ben look at me as if I was special.
“You’re so fucking beautiful.” His voice was husky and deep.
His breath was warm along my thigh and it took a bit of nudging on his part, but my legs gave way and I was fully exposed to him. A blush crept up my neck and along my face, which was weird. I was no angel. I’d been in this situation before but it was different this time.
Ben was different.
I’d never felt this much raw need and desire to connect with someone. Never. It pressed hard, making it difficult to breathe, difficult to think. And I can’t lie. It was scary as hell.
This was different on so many levels. I didn’t just want to fuck. I wanted something deeper.
I wanted to matter.
His mouth moved slowly and I shuddered when his hands gripped my thighs, when he held them apart, and when he kissed me down there. I think I moaned—I’m sure I did—and I almost felt him smile against me.
And then his tongue and fingers were on me. In me. Stroking. Licking. Sucking. I was going crazy and the pressure inside was red hot. It was exquisite and as the ball of ecstasy widened and throbbed and then exploded, it was his name on my lips. His face in my mind.
His head in my hands as I held him there.
Ben.
And then he was kissing his way up my belly, his hands on my breasts, fingers rubbing my nipples.
“Oh God, Ben,” I whispered when he opened his mouth and sucked on my nipple, his tongue working it while he pulled and nipped.
I could barely catch my breath and he grinned up at me, “God has nothing to do with it, Peaches.”
Peaches. He’d called me that earlier as if it was his pet name for me. I fucking loved it.
Our eyes held each other and for one intense moment we connected—really connected—and I reached for him, coaxing him up because I had to kiss him. I had to show him how I felt inside because I knew there was no way I’d ever be able to explain it.
I kissed him as if he was the air in my lungs. As if he was the blood in my veins. As if I needed him to live. And then I trailed a bunch of kisses down his neck, my hands all over his shoulders, falling to his abs and then lower.
He moved slightly giving me room and I gazed into his eyes, loving the way his pupils dilated when my fingers found the hard length of him.
“Shit, Georgia.” His voice was hoarse, the veins on the side of his neck stood bulging as I slowly stroked every inch of him from the base to the top.
“I can’t,” he said roughly. “I won’t last.”
When he rolled away and grabbed a condom, I felt lost. I wanted him on me. Against me.
In me.
Sweat beaded along his forehead and I pushed away his rain dampened hair as he moved over me, his large body hot and hard. He cradled my face between his hands and as his mouth reached for me, as his tongue danced with mine, he eased inside me.
Our eyes were open. I couldn’t look away. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t utter one single sound.
It was as if this perfect moment was suspended in time and I would always remember what it felt like this first time. We weren’t fucking. We were making love.
His eyes were hooded as he began to move and he groaned into me. “I knew you would feel like this. So hot, and tight, and fucking perfect.”
I still couldn’t speak, but ran my hands along his shoulders as my hips met him thrust for thrust. We were perfect together. We fit in a way I had never experienced. Call it corny or stupid or whatever, but this guy was made for me.
He hiked my leg higher and our rhythm increased as we strained against each other, into each other, long slow strokes that gradually increased. He murmured all kinds of things in my ear but I couldn’t tell you what they were.
His mouth was everywhere, licking and sucking, driving me crazy. On my breasts, against my mouth. There beneath my ear.
And when I felt that pressure build and expand I grabbed him and dragged his mouth back to mine. I kissed him, throwing everything I was feeling into that moment.
I came just before he did and our worlds shattered together.
Holy. Fucking. Shit.
How in hell did you top something like this?
For the longest time, Ben held himself over me, this weight on his elbows as he pulsed inside me. As our connection solidified. I felt his heart against my palms, his warmth along my skin and I never wanted him to leave.
“That was…” God, I couldn’t vocalize what was in my head.
Ben leaned forward and kissed my cheek so tenderly it brought tears to my eyes.
“Yeah,” he said softly. “It was.”
I woke up to a dark room, a hard body pressed into my back and one arm slung over my waist. I could tell by the way he was breathing that Ben was asleep, and for a few moments I laid there, not wanting to be anywhere else, tucked into his body as if I belonged.
I rested my head against him and listened to the rain that still fell outside as I gazed up through the glass ceiling above his bed. It was awesome lying here with Ben, underneath a dark rain-soaked sky.
I didn’t want it to end. Ever.
My throat tightened at the thought and I had to mentally smack myself down. How in hell could I be thinking of forever when A) we’d just met a few weeks ago and B) I was messed up.
Why would Ben want to get involved with someone as fucked up as me? A girl who had no idea if she would be healthy next week, let alone next month? As soon as he found out about the ‘before’ me, he’d either run or worse, he’d try to fix me. And there was no way he could do that.
Mental illness wasn’t something you could fix. It was something to be managed. Something my mother had failed at, so why the hell did I think I was going to be any better at it?
‘You need to learn to manage your illness before you can give yourself to someone. And you need to be honest with that someone.’ Seamus’ words, not mine, and he should know.
We’d chatted about Ben at our last session and he’d told me point blank that it was a bad idea to get involved with someone right now. He’d said that I was still feeling my way through the darkness and that I needed to stand on my own before I could even consider being with someone, especially someone who had no idea that I was fucked. (His words had been more gentle but I knew what he meant.)
When he’d asked me if I had shared the details of my illness with Ben, I’d stared at him in horror and shook my head. I couldn’t answer him because the fear inside me was that strong.
Ben would run. Any sane person would run.
Wouldn’t he?
Restless I slipped from Ben’s embrace and fell out of the bed. I was cold but my clothes were still in a damp pile on the floor beside the bed. I grabbed my cell phone out of the pocket in my skirt and then rummaged through his closet where I found a bright orange Flyers T-shirt. I slipped it over my head and then paused at the door.
Ben was sprawled face down across the bed now, the blankets rumpled around his waist though they were low enough that I could see the top half of his nicely rounded ass. His face was turned slightly and I could only see his profile, but damn he looked sweet with his messed up hair.
My phone vibrated
startling me and I glanced down at it quickly, noting that it was nearly eleven. I knew it was late but I was surprised at just how late it was. Having sex with Ben had eaten up most of the evening and after three rounds of hot, orgasm filled lovin’ we’d fallen into an exhausted sleep.
Shit.
I slipped out of Ben’s bedroom and fingered my phone. It was Matt. He was probably freaking out because I hadn’t talked to him all day and he had no idea where I was.
Padding through the darkened house I headed for the kitchen and answered.
“Where the hell are you?” His voice was harsh.
“Hello to you too.”
Okay, he was pissed.
“Do you know it’s nearly midnight? I’ve been going out of my fucking mind. Don’t you check your phone?”
Okay, he was more than pissed.
“Georgia?”
“Yes, I’m here, Matt. Sorry.”
“That’s it? That’s all you’ve got?”
Irritated at his tone I snapped back. “I said I was sorry. Time just kind of got away from me. You don’t have to worry. I’m good.”
“Well that’s good to know now. Dammit, Georgia I was ready to call Seamus. Or the police or even fucking Kendall.”
“Are you kidding me?” I sputtered, my throat tight. “What do you want me to say? I’m sorry I didn’t pick up my fucking phone. But Jesus, Matt, it’s not even midnight and I’m twenty years old. It’s not like I have to check in with you.”
“As long as you live with me you do. As long as I’m responsible for you, you fucking do.”
Silence followed his angry words and my throat closed even more. “Nice. Thanks for that.”
He swore and I could picture him running his hands through his blond hair and pacing through his loft. “G, I just…fuck, I was worried.” He paused the space between us filled up with empty static. He cleared his throat. “ Ben came around looking for you too.”
“I know.”
“Where are you?” he asked abruptly.
I winced, picking at the hem of my T-shirt. “I’m with Ben.”
“You’re with Ben.”
“Yeah.”
I tightened up, waiting for the blast that was going to come. Waiting for the condemnation, the anger or worse, the silent treatment. Instead I got a long sigh and I could picture him rumpling his messy blond hair.
“Are you coming home, Georgia?”
Surprised that he didn’t chew me out for sleeping with Ben, I didn’t answer right away. I gnawed on my bottom lip, hating how he’d intruded into my perfect little bubble.
Of course bubbles would burst and reality would set in, so why not now?
“G?”
“I don’t think so, Matt. It’s late.”
Awkward silence fell between us and I wrapped my arms around my waist, suddenly cold as hell. “Look, Matt. I’m sorry. I know you probably think this is a bad idea but I…I can’t stay away from him and it’s not just me. I’m pretty sure he feels the same way.”
I heard my brother exhale and hoped his disappointment wasn’t too much.
“Okay, I get it.” he said. “You’re both adults so it’s not like I can get in your shit and tell you what to do but G, just…I want you to be careful. I need for you to be careful. I almost lost you last year. I can’t…” His voice broke and I swallowed painfully, a lump the size of a basketball stuck in my throat.
“Matt, I’ll be good.” Did I really believe that?
“You still have a long way to go and I…Christ, Georgia I know you think I’m worried about Ben but I gotta tell you that it’s not Ben that I’m concerned about.. Ben’s a big boy and unlike some of the other guys you’ve screwed around with, he’s got brains. He’s the real deal. Ben Lancaster is headed for the top and I just don’t want to see you hurt.”
I didn’t need Matt to say anymore because it was pretty obvious that he, too, thought there was no room for a girl like me in Ben Lancaster’s world.
My bubble instantly deflated because sadly, it was already too late. I was already in way too deep with a guy who was riding that shooting star, the one that had no room for me.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Matt. I’m sorry I worried you.”
“I love you, G.”
“I know,” I whispered. “I love you too.”
I’m not sure how long I stood in the dark, staring out at nothing but I was surprised when two strong arms slipped around me from behind, pulling me back against a warm, rock hard body.
“Hey,” Ben murmured against my neck.
Shivers rolled over me and I closed my eyes, shaky, confused and—as his mouth kissed a path along my neck up to behind my ear—horny as hell and already damp for him.
“What are you doing out here?”
I smiled when he nipped at my ear, his hands dropping to my hips holding me still while his erection ground against me.
“I was hungry.”
“Did you eat?”
His tongue licked the edge of my earlobe and then traced the inside contours as I trembled in his arms. How could he do this to me? How was I already weak with need?
How was I not hungry anymore?
“Because I’m hungry.” He continued his assault, his hands now underneath my T-shirt, rolling over my skin until his fingers were between my legs. Until he was inside me.
“But not for food.”
“Ben,” I said hoarsely, my mind already blind to everything except him. I groaned as he began to stroke me, while his tongue continued to do wild and crazy things to my earlobe.
“Let’s go back to bed and I promise I’ll make you the biggest, baddest breakfast in the morning…or later, I don’t care. I just need you again.” His whispers were feverish, his touch on fire. “‘I need you right now, Georgia.”
God, the way he said my name.
He lifted me without another word and I forgot about food. I forgot about Matt. I forgot everything except Ben’s mouth, his hands and his body.
He took me to places I’d only read about in those romance novels my mom used to read. Places I had never thought were real, because in my reality that kind of perfection was fake. It was unattainable. It had never been real until now.
I let him take me there more than once, and this time when we fell asleep together, we stayed that way until the sun came up.
Chapter Nineteen
Ben
I watched Georgia eat and though it sounds stupid and lame, man, I could watch that girl do nothing and be perfectly happy doing it.
Her long hair was really tangled and wild looking, but I liked it. I liked that my hands had snaked through those waves and had sculpted them while I’d been inside her.
Just thinking of everything we’d done the night before was enough to get me hard and I shifted in my seat, adjusting an already thickening erection as I watched her eat.
She had no makeup on and looked almost vulnerable as she sipped her coffee, her eyes on the yard, her body curled up in my T-shirt. We were on the deck out back having a big ass breakfast—I don’t mean to boast but I’m pretty much the king of eggs and bacon—and it was almost nine.
Time for me to ask the big question. Time for me to take this girl on a date.
“So, Peaches.”
She glanced my way, her eyes automatically moving down my bare chest, going lower to the large bulge in my boxers. Which, at least were black this morning—not that the color hid much.
When her eyes met mine again, my gut tightened and my heart sped up. A smile widened that sexy-as-hell mouth and I found myself answering with the same. How could I not? The girl was everything I had ever fantasized about and more….more because she was real. And she’d spent the night with me.
Peaches was mine, she just didn’t know it yet.
“Why do you call me that?” she asked softly.
“Peaches?”
She nodded.
“I don’t know,” I answered truthfully. “It somehow fits. Georgia peach?”
“No shit,” I answered, my grin widening when she moved closer and whacked me on the arm.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
I had no idea what she said because when her legs untangled I’d caught a peek at the treasure between them and every sane thought in my head automatically went south. Way fucking south.
I couldn’t believe it—this had to be some kind of record—but I seriously could have bent her over the chair and taken her again. I was that hard and horny for her.
I reached forward and kissed her, my hand in that hair, my tongue in her mouth. My plate crashed to the deck but I didn’t give a shit and pulled her out of her chair and onto my lap because I needed to feel her. Touch her with my hands and my mouth.
She squirmed against me and my fingers roved up her shirt, feeling for her breasts—wanting to touch every inch of her body again. She made me crazy, so damn crazy, and we were just getting started.
We came up for air and I took a breath and then whistled, low and suggestively. My T-shirt had ridden up past her chest so she was basically naked, and my cock was so hard it was standing on end like a fucking flag pole.
“Ben,” she whispered, her mouth swollen from mine. “We can’t.”
“We can,” I grumbled against her.
“You’ve got more stamina than a horse.”
“Well, I’m hung like one. What did you expect?”
She giggled and I decided that if I could hear that sound every minute of every day, my life would be complete. That’s what this girl had done to me in the space of a few weeks.
I went silent and just looked at her. I knew that what I was feeling wasn’t just that excitement you got when you had hot sex with someone new. I’d been there and done that many times. Whatever this was, it was more than that. A hell of a lot more than that.
“I should go,” she said slowly, stretching her arms above her head. Her nipple was right there and I flicked my tongue over it, loving the whimper she made when I did it again.