Heart in the Right Home

by Lisa Hill

  ‘Hmmm?’ Louise broke away from her illustrious thoughts and turned to see Pamela Hardwicke standing on the other side of the counter, her basket brimming with purchases. ‘Sorry, is Johnnie not on the till in the shop?’

  ‘He’s talking to Jack.’ Pamela heaved her burdensome basket onto the counter and leaned in towards Louise. ‘Which is why I’m here.’

  ‘Right, but I can’t ring those purchases through this till, we keep them separate, sorry.’

  Pamela waved her perfectly manicured, red nails dismissively. ‘I’m not here to buy these, I’m here,’ she turned around to check no-one was in earshot and lowered her voice, ‘to talk to you about wedding cakes.’

  Louise’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. ‘Oh, um, right. Is James getting married then?’ Louise was aware how long-suffering Lottie was as a daughter-in-law; she had to pity the next, unsuspecting victim.

  ‘No, not James, me!’ Pamela staged whispered.

  Louise remembered to close her mouth just in time. ‘Oh, congratulations! I didn’t know your divorce had come through yet?’

  ‘It hasn’t,’ Pamela hissed, ‘which is why I’m whispering. We’re keeping it quiet for the moment; obviously the family knows.’

  Recovering from her initial shock, Louise clasped her hands together. ‘Oh, how lovely, congratulations.’ She was genuinely pleased. Jack was such a gentleman and she had always felt sad that he was a widower. Secretly, Louise envied Lottie and her relationship with Jack. Although incredibly sad that Lottie had lost her mother so young, she had a close relationship with Jack and the two clearly helped each other out. Louise had never really got on well with her parents. Living in the shadow of her older, much more successful sister, Sofia, Louise had been glad to stay in London after university. In fact, since they’d moved to Yorkshire she barely saw her parents, just the obligatory visit down to see them at Christmas. It was probably why she had latched onto Johnnie at such an early age and been grateful for the stability he’d provided her.

  ‘Thank you,’ Pamela hurried on. ‘The thing is, I know you’re going to be booked up with cakes after that spectacular one at the Thorpe’s wedding and I don’t want to miss out. So, can you pencil me in?’

  ‘Of course,’ Louise said, picking up a pad of paper and pen from under the counter, a thrill zinging through her of feeling wanted. Sought after, in fact. Debbie Newcross, the lady she’d spoken to last weekend at the wedding, had replied to Louise’s email this morning wanting Louise to send over some initial sketches. Louise didn’t know when she was going to find the time, but she was determined she would. It felt like the beginning of something. ‘What’s the date then?’

  Pamela blushed. ‘We don’t actually have a date but I’m hoping September, certainly the autumn.’

  Louise pursed her lips together, desperate to conceal her astonishment.

  ‘I know what you’re thinking—’

  ‘Please, Pamela, it’s really none—’

  ‘You’re thinking, stupid woman, hasn’t even divorced her husband and is planning the wedding to the second one. The thing is, Jack and I aren’t getting any younger. Who knows how long we have left together or altogether, if you catch my drift?’

  It dawned on Louise that she actually did. She nodded. ‘Live for today.’

  ‘Exactly.’ Pamela’s perfectly applied raspberry lipstick parted to show off her pearly white teeth.

  A thought suddenly flashed across Louise’s mind. ‘May I ask you something, Pamela?’

  ‘Of course.’

  ‘What made you realise you were unhappy in your marriage to Edward?’

  If Pamela was caught off guard by such a personal question, she certainly handled it well. She tilted her head back and raked her fingers through her blonde bob, evidently composing her answer in her mind. Finally, she turned to look at Louise. ‘Do you know, Louise, I think I always knew that I’d made the wrong decision. But life was different in the Seventies; I’d made my bed, I had to lie in it. And if you’d asked me a year ago if I would have had the balls to leave Edward, I’d still have told you that was my bed to keep on lying in, but I was lucky. He was the unfaithful one and, in doing so, he set me free.’

  ‘Not to mention he’d done that a few times before.’

  Both women jumped to see Jack standing behind Pamela.

  Pamela’s hand flew to her chest. ‘Oh, Jack, you gave me a fright!’

  ‘Come on, we’re picking the children up from cricket practise soon.’

  ‘Okay, I just need to pay Johnnie for these.’ Pamela hauled the basket back off the counter. ‘I’ll be in touch to confirm a date, but promise me you’ll fit me in?’

  Louise smiled. ‘Of course, I will.’

  Pamela waggled her fingers and wandered off through the archway, back into the stores. Jack moved closer to the counter and appraised Louise with an all-knowing look. She found herself fiddling with the ties of her navy and white striped apron.

  ‘What she failed to mention is that we’d developed a friendship prior to me nudging Edward out of the family nest.’

  ‘Right.’ Louise nodded, not knowing what else to say.

  ‘Everyone has a right to be happy, Louise. As long as we try not to hurt others in the process.’ Jack winked, before turning on his heel and returning to the stores.

  Louise’s gaze returned to the view over the fields. Perhaps her acting wasn’t as good as she thought it was, because it appeared her unhappiness was not only clear to her daughters, but some of the villagers too.

  ***

  ‘I guess that’s probably the last ones,’ Lottie said, collecting up the brochures. She looked at her watch, it was just gone midday. ‘Busier than I thought.’

  ‘Yes, I’m surprised actually,’ Rebecca replied. ‘It hasn’t had any redecoration for a good twenty years, I really thought it would put people off, the fact it needs a complete overhaul.’

  ‘I spoke to three of our investment landlords, they’re all interested.’

  ‘That’s the advantage of you offering lettings, I guess. We don’t have that many landlords on our books.’

  That’s because most of Hardwickes’ properties came with expensive price tags and weren’t of interest to landlords wanting to make money, Lottie silently thought. That wasn’t Rebecca’s fault though, that was Edward’s; the elephant in the room.

  ‘So, what are you doing now?’ Lottie asked breezily, as she slotted the brochures into her file which she carried everywhere with property keys and business cards.

  Rebecca looked at her watch. ‘Back to the office, I guess. I expect James will want relieving for a break.’

  ‘Stuff James, let’s go and have lunch. Betty’s, my treat.’ She stared at Rebecca with dare to defy me meaning in her eyes. She’d promised James she’d talk to Rebecca, but the morning had been busier than she’d expected, and it was even more difficult to slip into the conversation, so, how are you? Got over shagging my father-in-law yet? She might be brilliant at interfering, but the art of tactfulness sometimes eluded her.

  ‘Oh, I don’t know—’

  ‘Oh, come on!’ Lottie placed her hands on her hips. She was wearing black, Capri trousers and killer heels and was in the mood for being defiant. Actually, with all the years she’d put up with being bossed about by Rebecca, she was starting to enjoy this. ‘James can wait; you can blame me. We haven’t caught up for ages and we’ve both worked really hard this morning; we deserve a little treat!’

  A wry smile twitched at the corner of Rebecca’s lips. ‘I’m not sure, I—’

  ‘Look.’ Lottie slung all the Hardwickes’ brochures into the pull along case Rebecca had brought with her. ‘How about we limit the first fifteen minutes to Edward; get the whole thing out the way and then we can move forward again, as friends.’

  ‘Friends?’

  ‘Rebecca, we’re both knocking on the door of forty and I’ve known you since I was nineteen. I think that probably amounts to a friendship, don’t you?’


  Rebecca’s pretty, pouty bottom lip trembled. ‘Um, yes, I guess so.’

  ‘That’s settled, then. I hope they’re still serving breakfast, I could practically inhale some eggs benedict.’

  Chapter Thirteen

  Betty’s had been busy when they’d arrived. They’d surreptitiously tried to blend in with the tourists all queuing down West Park Street – a mean feat both wearing trouser suits and stilettos – and were now sipping champagne whilst waiting on their smoked salmon eggs benedict. Having skipped breakfast the bubbles were going straight to Rebecca’s head, which wasn’t a bad thing seeing the conversation on the walk up from HG1’s car park at the back of the Ginnel, had been slightly stilted.

  Lottie put down her champagne flute and leaned in towards Rebecca. ‘So,’ she fixed Rebecca with a meaningful stare. ‘How are you? Really?’

  They had a cosy little table in the corner of the ground floor, both chairs angled together so they could enjoy the view over Montpellier Parade and the formal gardens. Rebecca looked out and bit her lip whilst she considered how best to answer Lottie’s purposefully loaded question. It would be so easy to brush her off, but the matter wasn’t going to go away until they talked about it and could, hopefully, move on. Recently, Rebecca had started to feel isolated; it would be good to have a friend with the same interests as her, something she never thought she’d hear herself conceding about Lottie. She may have had an affair with Lottie’s father-in-law, but Rebecca wasn’t sure she could find anyone who hated Edward more than Lottie. Perhaps she was the sympathetic audience Rebecca had been looking for after all.

  ‘Don’t laugh, but I thought I was in love with him.’

  Silence. Voices tittered and laughed around them, china chinked, waitresses came and went carrying plates of food, but Lottie remained silent and still. Her hands clasped together on the table, continuing to look at Rebecca with that appraising stare.

  It was uncomfortable. ‘I realise now, I wasn’t,’ Rebecca hurried on, surprising herself with how unnerved she felt by Lottie’s stillness. ‘I mean,’ she shifted in her chair and crossed her legs, ‘I know I’m the one in the wrong; he was married for goodness sake. What was I thinking?! I should have left well alone, but I was flattered. He’s a successful man, I’ve always admired him.’ She finally took the courage to look at Lottie who was showering her with an expression full sympathy. No pity. No judgement. Just some sort of unspoken empathy. ‘Now I feel lonely all the time and I have this overbearing feeling of guilt. I tried to resign, but James wouldn’t hear of it. We’ve agreed he’s got a month for me to change my mind and, if I’m still not coping, I can walk.’ She shrugged. ‘I feel like running away, leaving Harrogate for good but my home is here and my reputation as an agent too. I could go back to my parents in Windsor, but I’d have to start all over again. I’m hurtling towards forty, my ovaries are on the point of shrivelling up and, oh—’ she grabbed her napkin and dabbed at the corner of her leaking eyes. How embarrassing, crying in public, she was made of stronger stuff than this! ‘I never thought I’d say this Lottie, but I envy you.’

  Tears were escaping from the corner of her eyes now. She took some deep breaths and tried to compose herself while Lottie laughed and necked back her champagne.

  ‘Can I have that in writing?’

  Rebecca managed to smile, glad that Lottie hadn’t turned on her with a lecture on how she should be ashamed of herself. ‘If you like. I’ve been a hard-nosed bitch to you in the past and I’m beginning to see the error of my ways.’

  Lottie leant her elbow on the table and pursed her lips together in contemplation. ‘I think you’re being incredibly harsh on yourself.’

  ‘Pah!’ Rebecca took a swig of champagne. ‘I committed adultery,’ she whispered. ‘I deserve everything that’s coming for me.’

  Lottie extended her neck and rubbed her fingers over her chin. ‘Do you remember when I kicked Drew out last year?’

  ‘Yes, and you were in the tabloids having a clandestine affair with Tom Thorpe. Only you weren’t really, you were being faithful, just trying to get your career back on track.’

  Lottie nodded. ‘True. But can’t you see the similarity?’

  Rebecca frowned. ‘Not really.’ Lottie was whiter than white. Always sticking her nose in where it wasn’t wanted, which had led to her separation from Drew, but she had nothing to feel guilty about.

  ‘Well, I had the family and wanted to get my career back on track and you’ve got the career but at the expense of no future with a partner and no babies on the horizon.’

  ‘Gee, thanks Lottie, you know how to kick a girl when she’s down.’

  Lottie shrugged. ‘I’m just trying to justify what happened with Edward, I guess.’

  ‘What happened with Edward was a mistake. He wasn’t going to give me kids, was he?’

  Lottie almost spat her drink out. ‘You would have been my mother-in-law, if you’d married him. Your kids would have been Drew’s half-siblings!’

  They both dissolved into giggles. Rebecca put her head in her hands. ‘See! It was doomed from the start, not to mention how I feel about Pamela. She’s been like a surrogate mother to me; I can’t believe how I’ve treated her.’

  Lottie rolled her eyes. ‘I shouldn’t worry too much about her; she’s shacked up with Dad now, even she concedes you’ve done her a favour.’

  Rebecca’s mouth suddenly went dry. It was one thing to think you were the topic of discussion, it was quite another to have it confirmed.

  She felt like a harlot. She was a harlot.

  ‘It has, um, come up in conversation then?’ She fiddled with the stem of her champagne flute, unable to meet Lottie’s gaze.

  Lottie put her hand on Rebecca’s forearm and squeezed it. ‘No one is judging you, I promise.’

  Rebecca raised her gaze to meet Lottie’s, still full of concern, not a trace of pity. ‘Just me then.’

  Lottie pursed her lips together. The waitress arrived with their brunch.

  ‘Thanks,’ Lottie said, making a fuss of her napkin, straightening her knife and fork. Rebecca stared at her plate, wondering how she was going to swallow her food.

  ‘You, Rebecca Cavendish,’ Lottie said, pointing her fork in Rebecca’s direction, ‘need to remember who you are.’

  Rebecca laughed. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?!’

  Lottie speared some lettuce leaves and hovered them, mid-air, on the end of her fork. ‘Valentine’s Day, last year? The office looked like a florist you had so many random men sending you flowers, and you were only seeing one of them!’

  Rebecca beamed at the memory. ‘I was seeing Michael at the time. I soon binned him off when Edward began flattering me with his attention.’

  ‘Well, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; Edward is exceptionally good at getting what he wants. You do know that showering of affection from half the eligible men of Harrogate was the catalyst for me kicking Drew out?’

  Taken aback, Rebecca detached herself from the table – she really wasn’t hungry – and crossed her legs. ‘No?’ she said, frowning. ‘I thought it was because Edward kicked you off the Clunderton Hall deal.’

  Lottie nodded, hurrying up with her mouthful of smoked salmon and toasted muffin. ‘Yes, that too, but Drew had bought me home a cheap bunch of peonies the night before and hadn’t even bothered with a card. All those flowers made me realise how wanted you were. Desired. Drew had started taking me for granted, you made me realise that.’

  Rebecca blushed. ‘You’re very kind, Lottie, but you don’t have to try and buoy me up. I’m carrying around too much guilt and even your Pollyanna outlook on life can’t raise me out of it.’

  ‘See, I told you so.’

  ‘Told me what?’

  ‘You’ve forgotten who you are. The real Rebecca Cavendish wouldn’t behave like this. That feisty filly would be out to prove everyone wrong. So, you made a mistake; what of it? We’re all allowed to make mistakes, as long as we learn from them.’ />
  Rebecca sighed. ‘And how do you propose, I do that?’ she asked, feeling the need to give in and humour Lottie.

  ‘I don’t know yet, but I’m sure there must be some way to make you see your own self-worth.’

  ‘Said like the real Lottie Hardwicke; ready to interfere at a moment’s notice.’

  ‘I most certainly am not!’ Lottie snapped. ‘I’m just, you know, making you feel good about yourself.’

  ‘And telling me you’re going to find a way for me to redeem myself.’

  ‘If I can recover from the tabloids accusing me of an affair with Yorkshire’s A-list heartthrob, I’m pretty sure we can gloss over your indiscretions with a man who should have known better.’

  Rebecca, feeling more uplifted than she had done in nine months, lifted her glass. ‘I’ll drink to that,’ she said, finally feeling like she had found some much needed friendship. But as she recovered her appetite to get stuck into her lunch, an uncomfortable feeling began to lap over her that friendship with Lottie would inevitably mean bumping into Pamela at some point. And she really didn’t feel ready for that.

  Chapter Fourteen

  ‘Have you lost a member of staff too?’

  Drew looked up to see James striding across the office of HG1 towards his desk. He looked at his watch; three o’clock. Lottie had popped her head in over three hours ago and said she was going for a quick bite to eat. He’d been so rushed off his feet covering lettings, he hadn’t realised the time.

  His stomach groaned. ‘Well, seeing I last saw her just before midday, I’d say, yes, I guess I have.’

  ‘Rebecca didn’t turn up after her open house, I’ve been on my own since nine-thirty.’

  ‘Ah, diddums.’ Drew grinned at James.

  ‘I coped perfectly fine on my own, thank you,’ he said, pulling out a visitor’s chair and crashing into it. ‘It was dead up at the office, so I thought I’d shut up early and take a wander down here, see how Lottie was getting on.’

  ‘Lottie?’

  What was she up to now?