We Both Can't Be Bae

by Borderhouse Publishing

  Keith reached to the nightstand and grabbed a piece of ice from the cup he had placed nearby while she was relaxing in the tub. He used the ice to sensually trace a path down Cameron’s body and followed the trail with his tongue. The temperature change heightened the pleasure along with the anticipation of her wondering where he would go next. Keith grabbed another piece of ice and drew circles around her breasts before slowly working his way toward her nipples. When he reached his destination, he sucked them with so much intensity that Cameron was propelled into complete ecstasy. She grabbed his head with one of her hands, letting him know to stay right there for a minute. He inserted two fingers into her pussy while he sucked her breasts. “Oh my God!” she cried out.

  Keith traveled down further and escalated his ice escapade game. He was enjoying it as much, if not even more than Cameron was. When he reached her pussy, he rotated between sucking her clit with the ice and his mouth and tongue. Back and forth with just the right amount of pressure applied. Cameron immediately climaxed but Keith wasn’t done satisfying her yet. After she came again he gave her what she really wanted, and what he knew she was going to miss the most. He fucked her so hard and good that she came three more times just in that round. That was just the beginning of what he had in store. He made sure this would be a night to remember as he entered her raw once again. After declaring that they would always love each other through sweat, tears, and a night full of lovemaking…they both ended the night by climaxing together.

  ***

  Chapter 2

  Three Years Later

  If it were not for the three carat diamond ring, wedding photos, and constant stories from Cameron’s friends and family, she wouldn’t have known a thing about her wedding day. It was all a big blur; there was only a mist where the memories should have been. The ceremony started almost two hours late because Cameron wouldn’t emerge from the bridal quarters. She had ice cold feet. It took her dad coming to get her for her to change her mind because wouldn’t budge for her mom or her friends. The mentally perplexed beauty imagined the entire ceremony to be just like her life was, routine.

  Toya teased her often about not reciting every line in her vows. Cameron literally stared at the pastor on parts she didn’t want to repeat like she was in a trance. Toya went in on Cameron about it every chance she got. The entire bridal party was shocked to hear that her husbands’ first name wasn’t Malcolm, including Cameron. The preacher asked Cameron if she took Keegan to be her lawfully wedded husband and Cameron screamed “WHO?” That preacher really wasn’t supposed to even marry y’all asses. Did y’all attend marriage counseling? Toya always said.

  He despised his first name; therefore he used his middle name, Malcolm. The girls would never let her live that day down. They constantly reminded her that three months wasn’t nearly enough time to know enough about a person, let alone marry them. Malcolm vowed not to have sex until marriage so Cameron’s father was immediately impressed. He did everything in his power to make it happen, including footing the whole bill. Cameron’s mom however was against the entire idea. She never revealed to Cameron that she knew about her secret lover, but she knew everything and she really liked Keith better than Malcolm. She fussed daily saying that Cameron had plenty of time before thinking about tying herself down for the rest of her life because she KNEW her daughter. A bigger wedge was formed between Cameron’s parents because of this wedding. She wasn’t even twenty-one and here she was about to get married.

  Malcolm was so predictable. Cameron knew him like the back of her hand; at least she thought she did. To people on the outside looking in Cameron had it made, but she felt empty on the inside. She only wanted to be truly happy and even at that, more spontaneous. She read so many books with happy endings and envisioned her life to be the same. A bed of roses is what she wanted. Cameron had always fantasized about one of those happily ever after endings and couldn’t get them out of her mind. It was her dream.

  The newlyweds lived in a 3500 square feet, four bedroom traditional home with three and a half bathrooms. Cameron was able to have some of the amenities she not only needed, but simply desired in her home. She had a spacious walk-in closet, a shoe rack that was to die for, her own vanity, a walk in shower, and a Jacuzzi. She wasn’t very hard to please. She liked nice things, but material things were not what she longed for in life. She tried her best to be happy but despite of it all she was miserable. Though she searched her mind and soul, she just couldn’t figure out what was missing. She didn’t know Malcolm enough to marry him, but she didn’t want to admit that to her friends.

  Putting all her dreams on hold to cater to a husband and child at such an early age was not what she had dreamt of. Cameron had big dreams of being a famous attorney and getting away from the small town she was raised in. There were no lawyers in her family and she wanted to be the first one. She wanted to move away and make her people proud of her. Everyone was always in anyone’s business but their own and never wanted more than complacency in life. One thing Cameron would never forget was where she came from, but she always wanted to do something different. She felt things may have been better if she would’ve had time to enjoy her marriage for a few years without a child but the cards didn’t fall that way. Cameron loved Kingston with all of her heart, but she felt trapped at times. She must have gotten pregnant two days after her wedding. Yes, two days because she did not consummate her marriage on her wedding night.

  Sex was nowhere near Cameron’s mind the night she got married. A huge argument quickly changed her mind and thoughts. Malcolm made sure to badger her about what went down the night before the wedding, and in her mind she knew he had every right. He had heard rumors about her leaving with some man in a black car and confronted her about them just as a new husband would do. Cameron ignored his rants and to deflect her guilty stance she argued with him about not disclosing his real name. She also brought up the mean stares she received from his family and how ugly the wedding pictures were bound to turn out because of his mom hiring a bootleg photographer. Even though Cameron’s dad had paid for everything, Malcolm’s mom had taken over with the planning. She changed things as if it were her wedding and attempted to save money that wasn’t even hers. She probably pocketed what she saved which Cameron made sure to express to her parents. Cameron slept at her parent’s house that night, in her childhood bedroom, and Malcolm slept outside on the porch. He refused to go home without her, and she refused to let him in. Her dad tried to make her go with Malcolm but she continued to refuse, so he finally gave up going back and forth with her about it. She wondered all night if she had made the biggest mistake of her life. Deep down, she knew that she had. Her truth made her cry herself to sleep on what was supposed to be the happiest night of her life.

  Malcolm worked as a cross country truck driver so his scheduled required him to be gone for two weeks at a time. He would come home for four days, leave right back out and worked overtime when he felt like it. He often complained about being away from Kingston so much, but had yet to put in the effort to find another job. Even though Kingston was the complete opposite of Malcolm from looks to personality, Malcolm loved him with all of his heart. Kingston had a creamy beige skin complexion with curly hair when his mom let it grow out. Malcolm hated for her to let it grow. Everyone loved Kingston so much because he was easy to please and he had a smile that could light up the darkest room.

  Cameron was forced to stay at home and raise Kingston until he was school age because Malcolm wouldn’t have it any other way. She argued her point constantly but nothing she said mattered to Malcolm. When he told her that he would quit work altogether or find a job at home she finally agreed to stay at home in order to keep him on the road. She was even forced to put school on hold for herself to shut him up. She started to resent him back then because he never compromised.

  In the beginning, Malcolm’s ways seemed sweet and innocent and Cameron mistook it for true love. Now the word “controlling” pops into her head and a
ssaults her pride when he suggests, or better yet “demands” things. As soon as Kingston became school aged, Cameron found a job as a paralegal. Malcolm wasn’t happy about it, but Cameron paid him no attention because she had lived up to her end of the deal. He reminded her about being submissive but she wasn’t hearing that shit. In a way, she was on a subliminal strike. To help smooth things over Malcolm had suggested they go to a few different groups at church for newlyweds, oh and he loved to throw things in her face that they heard while they were there. When she threw something in his face he would always make up some bullshit excuse to flip it. Cameron felt like those groups should have been for eighty year old couples, not twenty year olds because the stuff was based from the 1930’s. To ease her own mind, or at least mask over her discontent of the whole situation, she decided to focus on her career.

  With the schooling and training that Cameron had, as well as a hook up from her friend Toya, she landed the job with ease. She looked at this as an opportunity to be closer to her original dreams. You gotta crawl before you walk, she told herself. Cameron absolutely loved her job and it was at work where she was able to relax and be herself.

  When Malcolm returned off the road everything was always the same as it has been for the past three years. He would always send a message letting Cameron know how far away he was in the middle of the night. Upon his arrival he walked in the door and went straight to bedroom. After he undressed and showered, he would nudge Cameron to wake her up. She always pretended to be asleep, but that never stopped him. Before she could even react to him he was in and out of her in the blink of an eye. If I would’ve fucked him before I said I do, I never would’ve married his ass, Cameron thought. Damn I should have listened to Shay, she always thought. No hey baby, no foreplay, no kiss my ass, no nothing. A few pumps and he was always done.

  By the time Cameron finished her shower and got dressed Malcolm was sound asleep, snoring. On that particular morning while Cameron was applying her makeup she heard Malcolm’s phone vibrate. That was very out of the ordinary because he never puts his phone on silent. After she finished putting on her favorite lipstick, MAC’s Ruby Woo, she walked over and picked up his phone. Even more shocked to find a pass code on the phone, she immediately attempted to bust it. She tried his birthday and BINGO!! So simple minded, she thought. Cameron read the newest text message which said, I enjoyed you, see you soon with two smiley faces. The number was not saved but it only took a couple of seconds to program it into her mind. Everything else had been deleted except messages between Cameron and Malcolm, plus a couple from his mom and sister begging for money. He was still snoring when Cameron placed his phone back down with her mind was racing a mile per minute. She had never gone through his phone before and began to feel like it was a mistake to do so at that time. I would rather not even know, Cameron thought. Who is this woman that enjoyed my husband so much that she just had to text? How long has she been texting? Time will surely tell, she thought as several thoughts began to take over her mind. She started to wake Malcolm up but decided against it when she glanced at the clock. She still needed to cook breakfast before she left for work. She always left food for him to prove that she could work while maintaining her household duties. It didn’t stop him from making smart remarks, but she did her part which put her mind at ease.

  ***

  Chapter 3

  As Cameron drove to work after dropping Kingston off at preschool, she tuned into the Rickey Smiley Morning Show as they were doing a segment called Love and War and a thought entered her mind. Malcolm is cheap and would fall for anything free so he could easily be persuaded, but Cameron wouldn’t allow herself to be embarrassed in such a manner. She continued listening in as the woman talked about how she suspected her husband was cheating and why she felt that way. She had them to call his cell phone and offer him a free trip, making everything sound legit. Once he agreed to take them up on their offer they asked him to provide a name of who would be accompanying him. The husband asked a few questions and then told them that he would be taking a woman by the name of Monica or something. They beeped out the last name. Go figure, the woman whom he had named was not his wife but a coworker as he revealed. His wife couldn’t hold her composure even though she had previously been asked to do so she made it known that she was on the phone. All hell broke loose. She cussed him out from A to Z and pig Latin back and forth! The husband began to stutter and try to convince her that he was just playing along with the people on the phone but the wife wasn’t hearing it. He even tried to say that he knew she couldn’t get off work and just wanted to show his new coworker a good time. She told him that he better go to the Monica bitch house after work because he sure as hell would not be able to come the place he used to call home.

  Just as quickly as the thought entered her mind, she dismissed it. Cameron began thinking, No way in hell would I embarrass myself like that. Maybe I’m over thinking this. Surely it’s nothing. I’ve been faithful, loving, caring, understanding, and totally committed to him since the day I said I do. I’m sure he’s satisfied. The only time we argue is about me working. He still wants me to sit at home but that is not up for debate. What man doesn’t want a woman who is bringing something to the table in this economy? Sure he makes good money, but I don’t want him holding it over my head like he has before. If I want to by myself something nice I don’t feel like I should have to jump through hoops to explain myself. He pays bills for his mom and sister every month without even consulting with me so I will continue working to bring something to the table and of course stashing some away in my rainy day fund. Every woman better keep a stash just in case because you never know when a nigga is going to trip. Oh and we argue about the fact that he wants to have more kids right now but I feel like we are content. I told him if it happens it happens, but he’ll never know my birth control pills are the reason it hasn’t happened yet. I’ve never complained to him about not being satisfied sexually so that can’t be it. Shay put me on to something that helps me to get the edge off and it has helped me to remain faithful. The only time she could enjoy sex with Malcolm was when she thought about Keith. She knew how wrong that was but it was only for a few minutes anyway which made it at least tolerable to do.

  Cameron made it to work, her place of peace, and logged into her computer before starting a fresh pot of coffee. She bumped into her girl Sonya, who was a junior partner at the firm and smiled while saying good morning. Sonya complimented Cameron on her red and white Versace blouse then immediately began to bash her about not meeting up with the girls for drinks on Saturday night. Cameron didn’t even have the chance to tell her how nice she looked in her orange Donna Karan dress that complimented her skin so well because Sonya was going in on her. Cameron had met Sonya through Shay and they were all mutual friends of Toya’s. Toya and Shay both worked as occupational therapists across town.

  Malcolm hated for Cameron to go out with anyone so she always made excuses not to go with the girls unless they could all take their lunch breaks at the same time or meet up immediately after work. Sonya gave her usual speech about how Cameron needs to enjoy life because we only get one, and silently she agreed. Don’t let life pass you by and honey live yo life, were phrases she would say often.

  Sonya is married with a little boy and she still finds time to have a social life which is why she’s always preaching her point. She was pregnant with a little girl but lost the baby at five months, so she took that as a sign not to have anymore. Even though her parents and in-laws loved kids and wanted her to try again, she didn’t want to put herself through the agony of possibly losing another child. In her eyes no one understood the pain that she felt. She never really expressed herself much but she made it clear that she was content with her son. Cameron always took Sonya’s words to heart because deep down she knew she was right and was genuinely trying to help. Sonya was a few years older than Cameron so she felt like Sonya was someone she could look up to. Cameron genuinely liked her and was glad they cro
ssed each other’s paths in life. Cameron agreed not to miss the next outing because if her feelings were accurate about what happened with the phone from this morning, she would definitely need a drink or three and some girl talk. Probably even some shots.

  Cameron started thinking back to how Malcolm use to run her bath water, rub her feet, give her massages, buy spontaneous gifts, and take her out. She thought back to their very first date and how sweet Malcolm was. She didn’t want to go out with him the beginning and she felt guilty for her thoughts after seeing how sweet he was. He was a true gentleman. He pulled out her chair, ordered for her, and was very attentive which was something she had never experienced before. Cameron was impressed but she still couldn’t help but to think about Keith, the one love that she no longer mentioned. She hadn’t realized it until now, but all of that had stopped some time ago. She had been able to remain true to her word that the last time would truly be the LAST time. It had been almost a year actually. How could I not notice that? I guess going through the motions does that to a person, Cameron thought.

  SHIT, Cameron swore mentally. She had been daydreaming and not paying attention so the coffee had run over and spilled onto her hand, blouse, and thigh. She didn’t even notice that she had started crying. Sonya walked back by and was ready to continue with her bashing until she saw the tears and disturbing look on Cameron’s face all the while noticing her coffee stained blouse as well. “Cam what’s wrong?” Sonya asked sincerely. Cameron began to cry harder feeling like she was losing her mind with her many thoughts. It seemed as if an ocean was enclosing itself around her mind. Sonya grabbed some Kleenex and paper towels and passed them to her. Cameron thanked her and tried her best to assure her that she would be fine. She explained that she really had a weird morning and she honestly didn’t know how to express it at the moment. She honestly didn’t know what to think so she figured it was best to keep quiet instead of jumping to conclusions. She took a few deep breaths and promised not to miss the next outing with the girls so that she could relieve some of her rising stress. Sonya gave her a gentle hug and told her that she would see to it that she kept her word before rushing off to a meeting that she had scheduled. Cameron was thankful she kept a change of clothes in her car most of the time, because now she didn’t have to leave work and go buy anything.