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Hope Returns

Page 23

by Dorey Whittaker


  Gladys’s living room lit up with excitement at hearing this wonderful news but everyone was careful to remain quiet so Hope could continue. “I finally told Michael that I could not marry someone I did not really love and I told him I did not think he really loved me.”

  Lisa gave Susan a quick high five at hearing this news as Hope continued. “I’ve found out a lot of ugly information today. I also got lots of my questions answered, but I don’t want to waste this long distance call talking about the Gundersol family. I want to talk to you about what I’ve learned.

  “I started out believing my life was just one big mistake; given away as an infant. Then the disaster at the bakery and then the trial, were all just part of some cosmic joke with me as the naive and gullible main character. But tonight, having just gone through a second attempt on my life within a year, my fiancé finally gone forever, and most likely at least two more trials in the near future for me, I now know my life has not been, nor will it be, a big mistake because the Creator of the universe has a plan for me and I am excited to find out what that plan is.

  “I’ve learned that although my life seemed to be spinning out of control—the One who controls everything has my life in His hands.

  “I’ve learned that I do not have to choose between my two families. It is not a competition where for one to win, the other must lose. I actually have one big wonderful family.

  “I’ve learned that I need to never be afraid to face the truth—even though painful. It is always better than living a lie.

  “I’ve learned that powerful people do not have power over me – that I should never surrender my right to stand up for truth – no matter what they threaten to do to me. I must never ignore my inner truth and allow others to lay guilt or shame on me, forcing me into going along just to keep the peace because—peace at any cost will never produce real peace.

  “Today, as we were flying around the curves of the highway, the steep cliff right outside my window and that man trying to force us off the road, I realized that life is much like that curvy road. At times, we have a beautiful vista with blue water spread out as far as we can see, then we hit a curve and everything changes in a flash and what was beautiful just a few moments earlier, becomes treacherous and life threatening. Then, after the crash, when I thought that man was coming up to the car to finish us off, and discovered it really was a rescue squad there to help me, I realized that life is too full of curves to try to maneuver through it by myself. I want to live a life of faith, the same life Tobias talked about in his study-guide, the same life Gladys and Ruth taught you to live, Mom, and I want my mother and father to come along on this journey of faith.”

  The hospital P.A. system announced that visiting hours were now over so Hope quickly brought the phone call to an end with, “I don’t really want to end this phone call. There is so much more I want to tell you guys, but we will have the rest of our lives together. Just know that I love all of you and will come back there as soon as they will allow me to travel, but this time I would like to bring my parents with me. I want them to get to know all of you and love you all as much as I do. Good night, everyone, I love you all.”

  A huge celebration of thanksgiving erupted at Gladys’s home that evening. Lisa’s joy was overwhelming, as mentally she reviewed Hope’s confession of faith. Gladys came over and hugged Lisa as she said, “Lisa, you know those curves in the road Hope was talking about reminds me of Dickens, ‘It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,’ right? But this is certainly one of those best of times moments.”

  “It sure is, Gladys,” Lisa agreed, her eyes filled with happy tears as she was finally able to add the one missing part, “and because my girl has experienced her own Epoch of belief, I know that my Spring of Hope has come to me as well.”

  As everyone began to settle into quiet conversation, Lisa took hold of Susan’s hand and silently walked out back to be alone with her sister. For several minutes they just sat in the stillness of the night, allowing Hope’s confession of faith to fully sink in. Susan could hear her sister’s breathing change from a contented sigh to a more rapid rhythm as she suspected Lisa was reliving the image of her little girl flying around those dangerous curves. Susan remained quiet, not wanting to force the conversation. The sky was clear and all the stars were out, as if God Himself was putting on a celebration display tonight. After all, one more of His precious little lambs had been rescued tonight and was now safe and sound.

  Almost reverently, Lisa slid her arm around her sister’s waist and whispered, “You know, Susan, all those childhood prayers really were answered, weren’t they. God has given us so much more than either one of us could have imagined. I’ve been sitting here thanking God for all the ways He has shown us He loves us – us – you and me, the Miller girls.

  “Susan, in my worst of times, I still loved you, but I also resented you. You were moving forward in life, happy, safe, and loved by so many, while I was stuck in a lifestyle no one could justify. I was so full of rage and excuses back then. You kept coming back no matter how I treated you.”

  “Because I loved you, Lisa,” Susan cried through thankful tears.

  “I knew you did, Susan, but I couldn’t hear what you were saying to me at the time. You wanted to wipe away my excuses and make me face who I was and my rage would not allow that. So, God sent Gladys to me. At first, I played the same game with her. I presumed she had no inkling what it felt like to live with crippling rage. I assumed she had always been this perfect, sweet old lady I was observing, someone who could never know my kind of rage.”

  Starting to chuckle out of embarrassment, Lisa turned and faced Susan directly and confessed, “Susan, do you know the night I realized how much God loved me?”

  Susan was too emotional to answer her sister. She simply smiled and shook her head no.

  “I had been living with Gladys for months, listening to Gladys and Ruth tell me all about how much God loves us all. I would usually just sit there quietly trying to ignore what they were saying. I had run through all my excuses and they had fallen on deaf ears. No matter what I said, these two women had a Bible verse ready and waiting for me.

  “Well, one night Gladys decided it was time for me to hear her story—the same story she told Hope and Benny just before my wedding. But with me, Gladys went into much more detail about just how ugly she had become while in her rage. She emotionally undressed herself to me so I could see that she really did understand what I was battling inside. She showed me all her scars that night, using words I could fully relate to. I remember sitting there, looking at this lady I had come to admire, telling me that she had been where I was. She was honest and transparent and I loved her for that. It was only then that I realized this Jesus she was talking about was the One who had changed her from that rage-filled person that I identified with – into this sweet and kind person I so wanted to become. I realized that this same Jesus had put this wonderful woman in my life because I needed a flesh and blood example of what Jesus could do for me if I would just trust Him. “That night I surrendered my heart, my excuses, and my past to God. It wasn’t easy, but it was so worth it. Seeing how God had changed Gladys gave me hope that He could, and would, change me also. I cannot imagine that night in the bakery, facing my daughter, if I had not had those eight years of restoration and healing before meeting her. Because Jesus forgave me of my past and changed who I was, I could be as honest with Hope as Gladys had been with me. When you stand before people, a forgiven person, you are able to be open and transparent because you know that the change was all God’s doing.

  “Then God sent Hope back into my life. I wasn’t expecting it. I wasn’t even asking God for that. I just wanted Him to keep her safe. He had done so much for me, how could I ask Him to bring my girl back to me? But God knew that Hope needed to see all the love in this family. She also needed to see our faith in action. Seeing what He had done for me and Gladys, showed her He is real and He can change our lives if we will trust Hi
m.”

  “Don’t you forget Ben,” Susan teased. “Ben is a really huge gift.”

  “I know. I do not deserve any of this, but God did it anyway.”

  “Susan, tonight, hearing my daughter say she accepted God’s forgiveness, makes me realize that I need to do something I have struggled against ever since I was forgiven. The Bible says, ‘With what mercy you show; you shall be shown.’ Gladys and Ruth have been challenging me to take a real step of faith and to finally forgive Mother for my childhood. For a long time I have refused, believing she does not deserve to be forgiven. But, Susan, I have been forgiven so much, how can I refuse to forgive her, regardless of how she responds? I need to go see our mother, but would you come with me? I do not expect her to behave any differently than she always has, but her reaction is not what must guide my actions. I need to tell her that God is in the business of forgiving everyone, you, me and her. I need to be free of the burden of carrying this around with me. I intend to make sure Marjorie Miller has heard the truth and then I will finally be free.”

  Susan smiled at her sister. “I’d be honored to go with you, Lisa. Hope is a wonderful thing, isn’t it? As children, hope was never part of our lives, nor was it ever part of our mother’s life. We know that God is not that big ogre up in the sky who enjoys beating us down, but our mother still believes that. We know He has a plan for our lives and that He can be trusted to direct our paths through all the twists and turns of life, if we will simply accept His love and trust His heart. It is the only way to flood our lives with His hope. Our mother needs to know this hope is available to her as well and she can only know it if she knows the God who offers this hope.”

  Lisa swung her arm around Susan and started back toward the house, saying, “You know, little sister, God’s hope really has returned, hasn’t it? Just imagine, we two Miller girls have become safe and secure in God’s love to the point that we are willing to go face the lioness to share this wonderful truth with her. I am so filled with gratitude that I cannot think of a better way of showing it than to share it with our mother. What she does with it is up to her but I need to try. After all, Susan, this is not the end—it is only the beginning.

  About the Author

  Dorey Whittaker lives in central Virginia with her husband, Bruce. She and Bruce have been married for forty-five years, raised two daughters, have four grandchildren, and have partnered together in lay ministries for over forty years.

  Having completed Wall of Silence and Hope Returns, Dorey is busy completing book three of this well received series.

  Coming Soon

  Book three of this series will cover three generations of the Bascom Family. We will travel back to the Stewart Plantation where Tobias’s grandfather, Tobias Samuel Bascom, and his twin sisters, Ms. Ruby and Ms. Pearl, were born into slavery.

  We will experience Antebellum Georgia on the Stewart Plantation as Samuel, Ruby and Pearl strive to keep their little family together. We will see what it was like as Samuel risked everything in order to keep his sisters safe as Sherman’s March on Atlanta threatened everyone in its path.

  We will watch these three young people struggle to find employment during post war Atlanta. Slaves no more, they sadly learn there are other ways people are held in bondage. Determined to make a way for himself, Samuel refuses to take the easy path—returning to Master Stewart’s employment. Although all three of them would be assured a roof over their heads, food in the belly, and even a fair wage for the labor they would be expected to do—Samuel knows he would always remain a slave in Master Stewart’s eyes, and even more damaging, Mr. Stewart would always be, Master Stewart, in his.

 

 

 


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