Sucks to Be Me

by Painter, Kristen

  “No one. Just me.”

  Incredulous, he raised his brows. “Could someone have followed you?”

  “Didn’t seem like it. What are you getting at?”

  “Two men are dead, Donna.”

  “Right, you said that. Wait. Are you saying you think I did it? I didn’t kill anyone. I just fought my way free.” The memory was blurry in places as she tried to piece it together. She needed to change the subject until she could gather her thoughts. “You think Tony hired these three new guys to handle this one specific job?”

  Rico’s gaze was piercing. He wasn’t letting up. “Where did this drop-off of yours take place?”

  She stared at her coffee cup. There was no way to go except forward. “An old industrial park near Midden.”

  “And you’re sure you weren’t followed? And that no one went with you?”

  “I’m not completely sure I wasn’t followed, but I promise on my children’s lives that I went alone.” She picked her gaze up. “H-how did the men die?”

  “Blunt force trauma.”

  Those three words were chilling. Was it possible? Had she really done that? She knew she’d been high on the adrenaline of the situation, but there was no way she was physically capable of that kind of damage.

  Was she? “Do you think I did that?”

  “Honestly, no. But this job has taught me to expect the unexpected.”

  There were other possibilities. She pointed them out. “Maybe Big Tony followed me. Or showed up after I left. Or sent a couple more of his guys to see how things were going.”

  “Maybe. What time was the meeting?”

  “Nine.”

  “Fits time of death.”

  She shook her head, out of words. The idea that she might have killed two men left her numb with grief and disappointment, even if they had been trying to hurt her.

  Rico seemed to sense she was closing down and changed the subject. “We found a few shell casings, but they matched the guns recovered at the scene. Also, none of the men were shot.”

  She had been, though. Her trench coat was proof of that. “Blood?”

  “A good bit. All but one sample matched the three men. The lab is still trying to find a match for that one.”

  That had to be hers. Which wasn’t on file, that she knew of. Or was it? She didn’t know. Couldn’t think clearly enough to figure it out. Funny that she’d never had a panic attack before, but sitting here in Rico’s office, she felt like she might be about to have her first one. Holy smokes, she was going to have a lot to talk to La about this afternoon.

  But right now, she needed fresh air.

  “I should go.” She clutched the strap of her purse. “I just remembered a thing I have to do.”

  She didn’t wait for Rico’s response, just got up and left the office, walking as quickly toward the door as her stupid high heels would let her.

  “Donna?” Rico called after her.

  She kept going.

  He didn’t catch up with her until the parking lot. “Hey, hold up. Wow, you can move. When did you get so fast?”

  Key fob in hand, she turned, squinting even in the overcast light. “I need to go.”

  “What aren’t you telling me? I know you’re holding back, and it’s clear you’re freaking out about something. I don’t think you killed those men, okay?”

  “But you think I’m capable of it.”

  “We’re all capable of it if the situation is right. But I like to think I know you well enough that killing someone is the last thing you’d want to do.”

  “It is.” Ending a life, or two lives, would make her as bad as the Villachis. At least Rico understood that. “Then how did those men end up dead?”

  “Most likely, the person who killed them was already there, waiting to see how things went down. When the guys failed to do whatever they were supposed to do, they paid the price.”

  That didn’t explain why one man had been left alive. Or why none of the men had been shot. The Mafia did things a certain way. Bullets were a big part of that. But she let it go, because it felt like Rico was doing his best to find another explanation, and she appreciated that.

  He leaned against her car. “So what’s going on? Did Tony threaten you? Someone else? You know we can protect you. I need to know everything that happened the other night so I can piece this together.”

  She shook her head, so upset she couldn’t think straight. She wanted to tell him everything. If only just to tell someone. “That’s the problem. I…don’t really know what happened.”

  “Come back inside. You can tell me what you do know, and maybe we can make sense of it together.”

  She glanced toward the office. What if Tony had tried to have her kidnapped, or worse, killed because he figured out she was about to rat them all out? “I’m afraid.”

  “I know.” He reached out and took her hand, surprising her. “But I also know how brave you are. And how much you want to put all of this behind you.”

  She thought about her kids and what they would want her to do. The right thing. It’s what she’d always taught them. She nodded and took a breath. His hand was warm and strong and a little calloused. “Okay.”

  They walked back in together. Donna prayed Rico didn’t laugh when she told him the whole story. Well, maybe not the whole story. There were a few parts she planned on leaving out. She couldn’t afford to have him think she’d lost it.

  In his office, she sat in the same chair. He closed the blinds so that no one could see in. Not like they didn’t know she was already in there, but it gave her a little sense of privacy all the same.

  “Can I get you anything? Warm up your coffee?”

  “No.” Her taste for it was gone now. She put her purse on the other chair, then looked him straight in the eyes as he sat behind his desk. “Are you going to record this?”

  “Do you want me to?”

  “No. I would prefer you didn’t. Not this first part, anyway.”

  “Okay.” He sat back and folded his hands over his belt buckle, the curiosity in his gaze undeniable. “I’m listening.”

  She couldn’t look at him all of a sudden, so she focused on the file on his desk. The tab read Villachi #301. Was that how many files they had on Big Tony’s organization?

  She took a breath and began. “The drop-off was at nine, but I didn’t go straight there. I found some things at the house, things I want to turn over to you. We’ll talk about it more later but suffice it to say that what I found made me very angry. So I left early and went to the cemetery to have it out with Joe one last time.”

  She looked up at him. He was nodding like he understood. “I had a whole speech planned, but before I could really get into it, I was knocked down and attacked by some idiot playing at being a vampire.”

  Rico’s smile disappeared. “What?”

  She nodded. “He bit me and everything. Knocked me out. When I came to, a woman was crouched over me. Checking that I was all right. She apologized for her friend and said she had to go after him. And then she was gone. Just like that.”

  His eyes widened slightly, then immediately narrowed as he pushed forward in his chair. “Did you have a doctor look you over?”

  “No, but I’m fine.” The fact that he even asked such a thing made him more caring than Joe had ever been. “I checked myself out when I got home. I didn’t find any marks. Not even a bruise.”

  That seemed to relax him. “You’re sure you shouldn’t still see a doctor?”

  “Positive.” She turned her head and pulled her hair back on the side where she’d been bitten. “See? Nothing.”

  He exhaled. “Okay. Then what happened?”

  “I realized I was in danger of being late for the drop-off, so I jumped in the car and hit the gas.” She wasn’t telling him everything but leaving out the craziest parts seemed like the best decision. Explaining that she’d woken up to find herself drinking blood from the wrist of a woman named Claudette just wasn’t something Donna wan
ted in her file, because even if this wasn’t being recorded, Rico would undoubtedly add his own notes.

  “Did you make it in time?”

  “I did, although I’d really wanted to be early. There was another car there, which I expected. I didn’t really know what to do next, though, so I got out and opened my trunk to get the duffel bag I was given to deliver. That’s when the first guy rushed me.”

  “Did you get a look at his face?”

  Was this a test? “No. They had ski masks on.”

  He nodded. “Yes, that matches how we found them. It also supports the kidnapping idea. If they’d intended to kill you, hiding their faces wouldn’t have mattered. What then?”

  “He was coming toward me, and I thought he was going to shove me into the trunk. Not sure why, but that’s what I thought. Anyway, as I turned I realized there was a second guy coming at me from the other side of the car. He grabbed me with his arm around my throat.”

  Rico’s gaze went very serious.

  She kept talking, miming the moves she’d made by reaching her hands toward her throat. “I used his arm for leverage to pull myself up and kick the first guy away.”

  “Smart,” Rico said.

  “I bit the second guy and got him to release me, then punched him as hard as I could.” She faded back into the moment. “That’s when I heard the car door open and the first shot went off.”

  He let her talk, not saying anything.

  “It grazed me. My shoulder. Or maybe it just grazed my coat, now that I think about it.” Although she’d been sure she’d felt pain. “The blood sample that hasn’t been matched could be mine. Not sure if I actually bled or not.”

  “I’ll tell the lab.”

  “Thanks. Where was I? Oh, yes, something about being shot at flipped a switch in me. I got crazy-angry.” She smiled. “I’m half Sicilian on my mother’s side, you know.”

  He grinned. “We know.”

  “Makes for a long, slow fuse that burns white-hot. Anyway, I turned toward the third man, the one shooting at me, and charged him.” She shook her head. “All I can tell you is that something came over me that I can’t explain. I shoved him into his car. I don’t know how I had the kind of strength I had. I’ve never experienced anything like it before. Adrenaline, I guess.”

  “The driver’s side window was shattered.”

  “That happened when he hit it.” She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth for a moment. “Is he the one who survived?”

  Rico shook his head. “From your telling, the man who survived would be the one you punched.”

  “Oh.”

  “I highly doubt you’ll be charged with anything. It’s up to the DA, but we have some influence. In case that’s worrying you. For one thing, it was self-defense. For another, you’re cooperating in an ongoing case. We make allowances for such things. For a third, I’m still not convinced you had anything to do with these deaths.”

  “Good to know.” She stared at her hands. “But if I did kill them, I didn’t mean to. I was terrified. And trying not to end up dead myself.”

  “The bureau knows. And considering the circumstances, you did exceptionally well.”

  “Thanks.” But there was no real gratitude in her voice. She was pretty convinced she’d ended two lives. That made her no better than Joe.

  That was a lot to take in. A lot to process. La was going to earn her $275 an hour today.

  If Donna went. She was starting to think she should just pack up and move while she still could.

  Chapter Ten

  “Hey,” Rico said.

  She looked up.

  “Don’t torture yourself over those goons. They weren’t saints. And they would have killed you. I’m sure of it.”

  She shrugged. “I’m sure you’re right. Doesn’t make me feel all that much better at the moment.”

  “Time helps.” His chair squeaked as he shifted. “You said the bag you were given to deliver was filled with newspaper. Did you know that before you went to the drop?”

  “No. Vinnie was adamant that I not look in the bag, so I didn’t. It had a padlock on it anyway. But after the third man was knocked out, I got curious. That’s when I realized something bad had been about to happen one way or the other.”

  “Who do you think did it?”

  “The way I figure, it has to be one of three people. Vinnie, who dropped off the bag to me and stressed over and over that I’d better keep out of it. Big Tony, because the bag had to have come from him. Or Lucinda, his wife.”

  Rico made a face. “Why would your sister-in-law do that?”

  “Because she’s got some wild idea that I’m after Big Tony. Can you imagine?” Donna made a gagging sound. “Please.”

  Rico laughed. “He’s so out of your league. I mean—” He blinked a few times. “It’s just that—I’ve seen Big Tony. He’s not exactly a male model, and you…”

  For the first time since she’d returned to his office, she grinned. “Yeah?”

  He flushed a little. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

  “But you did.”

  He took a breath. “You could have any man you wanted. That’s all I’m saying. So Lucinda Villachi is crazy. Except, if she thinks you want to stay in the family, then she might imagine you’d come after Big Tony.”

  “I suppose. I’ve never given her any indication that’s true, though.” Her insides were warm and toasty from Rico’s kind words. Also, the butterflies were back. Rico thought she could have any man she wanted.

  Little did he know his was the only name on her list.

  “Do you still have that duffel bag?”

  “I do. It’s in the trunk. Do you want me to go get it?”

  “No, I can send one of my guys out to grab it.”

  What if he saw the boot box behind the driver’s seat? He’d have keys to her car. He could do some snooping. “Why don’t you just walk out with me when I leave? I’ll give it to you then.”

  “That’s fine. What’s this stuff you found in your house? The stuff that made you mad? Where did you find it?”

  She sighed hard. “I found a secret room in Joe’s office. A stash room. You can have everything in it. Or I’ll find a way to dispose of it, but I’m guessing you might consider some of it evidence. Lots of guns, some body armor, boxes of ammunition, and a few more boxes of what looks like cocaine and marked playing cards.”

  His brows went up. “I’ll take all of that. The guns could be especially important once ballistics tests them.”

  “That’s what I thought too. But what I think you’ll find the most interesting are the ledgers. There’s one for every year that Joe worked for Tony.”

  Rico’s eyes rounded a little, and his excitement was undeniable. “Ledgers?”

  She nodded. “I looked at one of them. Didn’t make much sense to me, but there’s a whole lot of names, numbers, dates, information like that. I figure you guys will make sense of it.”

  “When can I have them?”

  “The sooner that stuff is out of my house, the better. But first, do we have a deal?”

  His eyes tapered down like he was thinking. “About?”

  “I want your word that I won’t have to testify and that you’ll still protect me, since I’m providing you with all kinds of new evidence.”

  “You have it, Donna. I promise.”

  “Good. Now, we have to figure out a way for you to get that stuff out of my house without making it plain that the FBI is paying me a visit. Any ideas?”

  He smiled. “We can handle that. And we can be there tomorrow.”

  “We?”

  “I’d like to bring another agent with me. Agent Kowalski. Good man. He’s been working organized crime almost as long as I have, and with this case getting hot, the help would be welcome.” Rico’s phone buzzed. He looked at the screen and nodded.

  She waited until he made eye contact with her again. “Okay. Tomorrow. What time?”

  “Three all right? I should be
able to coordinate everything by then.”

  “Yes. Text me if that changes.”

  “I will.”

  She looked at her watch. “I should go. I have another appointment I need to get to. Are we good?”

  “We’re good.” He stood. “I’ll walk you out and get that bag.”

  She got to her feet and started for the door. “I’ll be happy to have it out of my trunk.” Then she stopped and looked at him. “Regardless of whether Big Tony’s the one who set me up or not, won’t he expect me to give the bag back to him? He’s texted and left me a voicemail, wanting to know how things went.”

  He came around from behind the desk. “So he’s either playing dumb, or truly out of the loop. But I think playing dumb. Covering his bases so he looks innocent. Tell him the guys took the bag.”

  “But he’ll know that’s not true if he talks to the one who survived. What’s that one’s name again?”

  “Albert Moran.” Rico was so close she could smell his aftershave. It was clean and a little woodsy. “And Big Tony won’t have that opportunity. We plan on taking Moran into custody this afternoon. The message I got earlier was to let me know ballistics matched the handgun found on him to a murder committed last year in Staten Island.”

  “Wow.” Her brows lifted. “I can’t wait to see what you find after you test all those guns of Joe’s.”

  Rico’s smile was sly and telling. “Me too. Now let’s go get that duffel bag.”

  After she gave him the bag, she left. Her mood was good from talking to Rico, and she wanted to browse the little boutique that was next door to La’s office.

  My Closet was one of Donna’s favorite places to look. She’d never done much shopping there, because even getting into their size eights had sometimes been impossible. She had a feeling things would be different today.

  She parked, grabbed her purse, and headed in.

  A soft chime announced her entrance. The store’s interior looked like it was designed to cater to the mob wife. And maybe it was. Shades of pink adorned the walls, leopard carpet covered the floor, and three crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling. Touches of gold completed the look.

  Donna couldn’t lie. It was appealing, but that was because it was somehow still done tastefully and with a touch of whimsy.